Chap.7- Explanations
"Sydney, wait!" Vaughn yelled at her retreating figure. She didn't stop or turn around, but kept going. He looked down at Jake and then at Lisa and realized what had gone through Sydney's mind.
"Dada!" Jake exclaimed, suddenly setting eyes on Eric. He waved his arms around, waiting to be transferred to his dad.
"Yes, my little man, unless there's something that your mother isn't telling me..."
Lisa glared at her husband for cracking jokes when his best friend was struggling with his emotions. Eric looked at her face and his smile disappeared.
"Why don't you go after her?" He suggested.
Vaughn looked over at Eric and started up the stairs when Scott walked into the room.
"The party's out back. Where's Sydney?"
"Um...upstairs..." Vaughn told him.
"Is she okay?"
"No...She seemed upset."
"I better go see what's wrong. Did you need something upstairs?" Scott asked, seeing that Vaughn was halfway up.
"Yea..." Vaughn trailed off, thinking furiously, "can I use your bathroom?"
"Sure." Scott answered. "Since you're almost up there, just keep going, turn right. It's the fourth door on your left."
"Thanks." Vaughn said, heading upstairs while Scott passed him, turning left.
Eric, Lisa, and Jake had left to go to the party and he slowly trudged upstairs. If only Jake hadn't insisted that his godfather carry him, if only he had told Weiss to meet him at the party, if only Lauren hadn't insisted on buying that house, if only....if only he had waited for Sydney.
Vaughn finally reached the top of the stairs and turned right, counted four doors to his left, turned on the light, waited five seconds, flushed the toilet, ran the water, and left the room. He was about to go back downstairs and join everyone else at the party when he heard Sydney and Scott in their bedroom.
Quietly, slowly, stealthily, he continued walking down the hall, ignoring the stairs and kept walking. Pressing his ear against the door, he could hear Sydney crying and Scott trying to console her. Vaughn experienced an extreme feeling of guilt for causing her so much pain.
"Sydney, tell me what's the matter," Scott tried. She didn't answer him. "It's the mood swings, isn't it?"
"Yea..." Sydney began hesitantly, "it's the mood swings."
"The first couple of months are the hardest, and then it gets better. Just imagine how beautiful our baby will be."
Vaughn's heart sank, and he could just see Sydney start to smile.
"Now, let's go downstairs and have a good time, okay?" Scott continued.
"Okay..."
Vaughn heard the bed rustle as they got up and he quickly turned to leave.
"You always make me feel better. I love you, Scott."
"I love you too."
When Sydney and Scott arrived back downstairs, Vaughn was already in a deep debate with Agent Lewis about the new training techniques and the competencies of the new agents compared to the old agents. Although his mind wasn't completely on the subject, he argued his points excellently and earned Agent Lewis' approval which meant a big promotion in the near future.
Ana was completely soaked and was forced to change into her bathing suit for the rest of the night. She was still mad at Mark and kept trying to get him back. James, watched uncomfortably as Mark chased Ana around the yard. Finally, he couldn't watch them any more and disappeared into the house.
Sydney looked at Ana pointedly and she sighed, running into the house after him.
By the time, Eric, who had taken over the grill when Scott left, took the last piece of steak off the grill; everyone grabbed their plates and sat down to eat. Loud conversations arose and soon everyone had abandoned their food to argue their point.
Eventually, everyone had finished their food and they all settled back into their chairs in silence.
"Excellent food, Scott, my compliments," Jack said, raising his wine glass in a toast.
"Here here!" Everyone said, following suit.
Scott bowed.
"Hey..." Katie started, "where's Ana and James?"
Everyone looked around and saw the two empty chairs.
"Oh, man!" Mark and Eric remarked at the same time. They looked at each other and grinned.
"Oh dear, there's two of them!" Lisa exclaimed. Jake gurgled happily as Vaughn tickled him under his chin.
Sydney watched as Vaughn talked and played with Jake. He was so natural and loving that her stomach flipped.
"Excuse me," Sydney said, clapping her hand to her mouth and rushing to the bathroom.
When she came back, everyone was still talking about Ana and James' disappearance. Sydney had checked in all the rooms of the house, not finding them anywhere.
"She must have forgotten you where here, Greg." Jack said, laughingly to Mr. Chen who had a disapproving look on his face.
"Are you related?" Sydney asked inquiringly.
"Yes. Ana is my niece. My wife and I took her in after her parents were killed by the communists on a mission. Her mother, my sister, and I were very close."
Everyone nodded sympathetically and Sydney looked at her watch.
"Oh! Look at the time! It's time for the game!"
Lauren and Scott hung back as everybody else rushed into the living room to watch the game on the big screen. Scott began to clean the grill and in mid- scrub, he suddenly noticed that someone was staring at him.
He looked at her expectantly.
"So why aren't you in there with them?" Lauren asked him.
"I'm not a big hockey fan." He answered nonchalantly and began stacking up the plates.
"I'm not either." Lauren said, helping him clean up.
The two of them could hear screams and shouts coming from the living room. Scott smiled when he heard Sydney cheering. He looked over to Lauren who was observing Vaughn. Scott could tell that she was in love but not content. Deciding not to say anything else, they worked in silence until the game was over and everybody else came out to join them.
While everyone else was chatting happily and excitedly about the amazing game they had just witnessed, Sydney and Vaughn stood uncomfortably. The awkwardness between them was unbearable and they had tried to avoid each other the whole night. Whenever Sydney looked at him, all she could think about was how innocent and adorable his little boy was.
Next door, Donovan could hear his master's voice and started to bark suddenly, waking Jake up from his peaceful sleep. Bawling and pushing his mother away, he reached out, screaming for his father.
"You better go to your son." Sydney suggested when Vaughn didn't move and she walked off toward the direction of the garden.
A look of confusion crossed Vaughn's face, but then he suddenly remembered how Sydney had mistaken Jake as his son. He walked swiftly after her and could see her, sitting on a bench under the beautiful new cherry blossoms.
"Syd..." Vaughn started.
"Vaughn...you don't have to explain anything. You're married, you have a child."
"Jake isn't my kid." He said hurriedly, as she started to get up. Sydney looked at him, and then sat back down. "I'm godfather."
"So...who's?"
"Eric and Lisa's."
"What!" Sydney asked in disbelief. "Eric has a kid?"
"I know." Vaughn said, agreeing. His heart ached and he realized how much he missed talking to Sydney. Eric, had left the CIA when Jake was born, continuing his career in law. He had only started for a week at his uncle's firm before he was recruited to the CIA. Now, his uncle had retired and left Eric his successful firm.
"Wait...so, Lisa isn't your wife?"
"No." Vaughn answered.
"She must think I'm awful..."Sydney thought, covering her mouth with her hand in shock. She had to admit that she had been especially cold toward Lisa and that she had been jealous.
"No, she won't." Vaughn said, assuring her. "She told me that you're a great person, but it seems that you have something on your mind." He tried, hinting.
She didn't respond to his hint, but continued clarifying the whole situation.
"I thought you were married."
"I am."
"But...Lisa's not your wife..." Sydney suddenly gasped and stared wide-eyed at Vaughn. "You're married to LAUREN!"
He nodded.
"Hey, neighbor." He said, laughing weakly.
Sydney closed her eyes and looked at her beautiful home.
"Well...you're going to have to be the one that moves." She told him.
"What?" He exclaimed. "No one's moving, Sydney. You know that neither of us can afford to move now.
"I guess I can always find another house..." Sydney said, sighing, not hearing anything he had just said.
Vaughn looked at her intently.
"Why do you want to get away from me?"
"WHY? Vaughn...don't make me tell you." Sydney said quietly.
"No, Syd. Tell me. Tell me why."
Tears started to well up in both of their eyes.
"Fine, Vaughn. I'll tell you. I'm finally over you. I have a great husband...I...I'm about to have a baby..." Sydney started, seeing the hurt in his eyes. "My life is almost complete. I'm happy. Don't you want that for me?"
"Syd, you know that I do."
"Then why do you keep hurting me?"
"You know I wouldn't hurt you. You're everywhere I go! In everything I do! At work, at home!"
"Would it have been better for you if I had died?" she whispered fiercely.
"Syd..." he begged.
He could see her mind whirling as she looked at him and a single tear slid down from his eyes and down his cheek.
"I would've waited for you Vaughn. I wouldn't have cared how long it took or if everyone else thought that you were dead. I had fought too hard to be with you. I would have waited forever."
"Sydney, wait!" Vaughn yelled at her retreating figure. She didn't stop or turn around, but kept going. He looked down at Jake and then at Lisa and realized what had gone through Sydney's mind.
"Dada!" Jake exclaimed, suddenly setting eyes on Eric. He waved his arms around, waiting to be transferred to his dad.
"Yes, my little man, unless there's something that your mother isn't telling me..."
Lisa glared at her husband for cracking jokes when his best friend was struggling with his emotions. Eric looked at her face and his smile disappeared.
"Why don't you go after her?" He suggested.
Vaughn looked over at Eric and started up the stairs when Scott walked into the room.
"The party's out back. Where's Sydney?"
"Um...upstairs..." Vaughn told him.
"Is she okay?"
"No...She seemed upset."
"I better go see what's wrong. Did you need something upstairs?" Scott asked, seeing that Vaughn was halfway up.
"Yea..." Vaughn trailed off, thinking furiously, "can I use your bathroom?"
"Sure." Scott answered. "Since you're almost up there, just keep going, turn right. It's the fourth door on your left."
"Thanks." Vaughn said, heading upstairs while Scott passed him, turning left.
Eric, Lisa, and Jake had left to go to the party and he slowly trudged upstairs. If only Jake hadn't insisted that his godfather carry him, if only he had told Weiss to meet him at the party, if only Lauren hadn't insisted on buying that house, if only....if only he had waited for Sydney.
Vaughn finally reached the top of the stairs and turned right, counted four doors to his left, turned on the light, waited five seconds, flushed the toilet, ran the water, and left the room. He was about to go back downstairs and join everyone else at the party when he heard Sydney and Scott in their bedroom.
Quietly, slowly, stealthily, he continued walking down the hall, ignoring the stairs and kept walking. Pressing his ear against the door, he could hear Sydney crying and Scott trying to console her. Vaughn experienced an extreme feeling of guilt for causing her so much pain.
"Sydney, tell me what's the matter," Scott tried. She didn't answer him. "It's the mood swings, isn't it?"
"Yea..." Sydney began hesitantly, "it's the mood swings."
"The first couple of months are the hardest, and then it gets better. Just imagine how beautiful our baby will be."
Vaughn's heart sank, and he could just see Sydney start to smile.
"Now, let's go downstairs and have a good time, okay?" Scott continued.
"Okay..."
Vaughn heard the bed rustle as they got up and he quickly turned to leave.
"You always make me feel better. I love you, Scott."
"I love you too."
When Sydney and Scott arrived back downstairs, Vaughn was already in a deep debate with Agent Lewis about the new training techniques and the competencies of the new agents compared to the old agents. Although his mind wasn't completely on the subject, he argued his points excellently and earned Agent Lewis' approval which meant a big promotion in the near future.
Ana was completely soaked and was forced to change into her bathing suit for the rest of the night. She was still mad at Mark and kept trying to get him back. James, watched uncomfortably as Mark chased Ana around the yard. Finally, he couldn't watch them any more and disappeared into the house.
Sydney looked at Ana pointedly and she sighed, running into the house after him.
By the time, Eric, who had taken over the grill when Scott left, took the last piece of steak off the grill; everyone grabbed their plates and sat down to eat. Loud conversations arose and soon everyone had abandoned their food to argue their point.
Eventually, everyone had finished their food and they all settled back into their chairs in silence.
"Excellent food, Scott, my compliments," Jack said, raising his wine glass in a toast.
"Here here!" Everyone said, following suit.
Scott bowed.
"Hey..." Katie started, "where's Ana and James?"
Everyone looked around and saw the two empty chairs.
"Oh, man!" Mark and Eric remarked at the same time. They looked at each other and grinned.
"Oh dear, there's two of them!" Lisa exclaimed. Jake gurgled happily as Vaughn tickled him under his chin.
Sydney watched as Vaughn talked and played with Jake. He was so natural and loving that her stomach flipped.
"Excuse me," Sydney said, clapping her hand to her mouth and rushing to the bathroom.
When she came back, everyone was still talking about Ana and James' disappearance. Sydney had checked in all the rooms of the house, not finding them anywhere.
"She must have forgotten you where here, Greg." Jack said, laughingly to Mr. Chen who had a disapproving look on his face.
"Are you related?" Sydney asked inquiringly.
"Yes. Ana is my niece. My wife and I took her in after her parents were killed by the communists on a mission. Her mother, my sister, and I were very close."
Everyone nodded sympathetically and Sydney looked at her watch.
"Oh! Look at the time! It's time for the game!"
Lauren and Scott hung back as everybody else rushed into the living room to watch the game on the big screen. Scott began to clean the grill and in mid- scrub, he suddenly noticed that someone was staring at him.
He looked at her expectantly.
"So why aren't you in there with them?" Lauren asked him.
"I'm not a big hockey fan." He answered nonchalantly and began stacking up the plates.
"I'm not either." Lauren said, helping him clean up.
The two of them could hear screams and shouts coming from the living room. Scott smiled when he heard Sydney cheering. He looked over to Lauren who was observing Vaughn. Scott could tell that she was in love but not content. Deciding not to say anything else, they worked in silence until the game was over and everybody else came out to join them.
While everyone else was chatting happily and excitedly about the amazing game they had just witnessed, Sydney and Vaughn stood uncomfortably. The awkwardness between them was unbearable and they had tried to avoid each other the whole night. Whenever Sydney looked at him, all she could think about was how innocent and adorable his little boy was.
Next door, Donovan could hear his master's voice and started to bark suddenly, waking Jake up from his peaceful sleep. Bawling and pushing his mother away, he reached out, screaming for his father.
"You better go to your son." Sydney suggested when Vaughn didn't move and she walked off toward the direction of the garden.
A look of confusion crossed Vaughn's face, but then he suddenly remembered how Sydney had mistaken Jake as his son. He walked swiftly after her and could see her, sitting on a bench under the beautiful new cherry blossoms.
"Syd..." Vaughn started.
"Vaughn...you don't have to explain anything. You're married, you have a child."
"Jake isn't my kid." He said hurriedly, as she started to get up. Sydney looked at him, and then sat back down. "I'm godfather."
"So...who's?"
"Eric and Lisa's."
"What!" Sydney asked in disbelief. "Eric has a kid?"
"I know." Vaughn said, agreeing. His heart ached and he realized how much he missed talking to Sydney. Eric, had left the CIA when Jake was born, continuing his career in law. He had only started for a week at his uncle's firm before he was recruited to the CIA. Now, his uncle had retired and left Eric his successful firm.
"Wait...so, Lisa isn't your wife?"
"No." Vaughn answered.
"She must think I'm awful..."Sydney thought, covering her mouth with her hand in shock. She had to admit that she had been especially cold toward Lisa and that she had been jealous.
"No, she won't." Vaughn said, assuring her. "She told me that you're a great person, but it seems that you have something on your mind." He tried, hinting.
She didn't respond to his hint, but continued clarifying the whole situation.
"I thought you were married."
"I am."
"But...Lisa's not your wife..." Sydney suddenly gasped and stared wide-eyed at Vaughn. "You're married to LAUREN!"
He nodded.
"Hey, neighbor." He said, laughing weakly.
Sydney closed her eyes and looked at her beautiful home.
"Well...you're going to have to be the one that moves." She told him.
"What?" He exclaimed. "No one's moving, Sydney. You know that neither of us can afford to move now.
"I guess I can always find another house..." Sydney said, sighing, not hearing anything he had just said.
Vaughn looked at her intently.
"Why do you want to get away from me?"
"WHY? Vaughn...don't make me tell you." Sydney said quietly.
"No, Syd. Tell me. Tell me why."
Tears started to well up in both of their eyes.
"Fine, Vaughn. I'll tell you. I'm finally over you. I have a great husband...I...I'm about to have a baby..." Sydney started, seeing the hurt in his eyes. "My life is almost complete. I'm happy. Don't you want that for me?"
"Syd, you know that I do."
"Then why do you keep hurting me?"
"You know I wouldn't hurt you. You're everywhere I go! In everything I do! At work, at home!"
"Would it have been better for you if I had died?" she whispered fiercely.
"Syd..." he begged.
He could see her mind whirling as she looked at him and a single tear slid down from his eyes and down his cheek.
"I would've waited for you Vaughn. I wouldn't have cared how long it took or if everyone else thought that you were dead. I had fought too hard to be with you. I would have waited forever."