Disclaimer: Don't own Smallville, Tina Turner, Max Max, or the word "Woobie." I did own Mel Gibson, but I forgot to renew my title.

Dedication: To Lex's Mafia. You know who you are.

Author's note: I never intended for this to be a finished story. However, two years after my last update I'm still getting requests to "wrap it up," so I will. But first, I'm updating the earlier chapters with some minor changes.

Explanations: "Woobie" is a term meaning someone needs a hug. Particularly Lex. "CoCK" stands for "Chamber of Clark Kent," the room in the mansion where Lex keeps all his Clark Kent memorabilia – er, I mean, all his meteor rock stuff.

When: Season 3 finale. Lex has just discovered Clark in the CoCK.
Where: They are still in the CoCK.
Why: Because he's beautiful when he's angry.


We don't need another hero
We don't need to know the way home
All we want is life beyond
Woobiedome

"This friendship is over!"

That stung a bit, but Lex never lost his balance. "You know, this is a bit rich coming from you, Clark. You haven't been honest with me since the day we met!"

Clark turned and began pacing. "And clearly I was right not to be, since you've been stalking me this whole time!"

Luthors, on the other hand, did not pace. "I have not been stalking you. I told you, I stopped trying to figure out what you were hiding two years ago – around the time I shot the one person who could have told me what's going on, as you may recall."

"Really. Then what's with the giant picture of me?"

Well, that was a good question. "I … just like looking at it," Lex explained, trying not to sound completely lame.

"You expect me to believe that?"

"Yes. Do you not have a mirror?"

Clark stopped and stared at Lex. Taking advantage of Clark's confusion, Lex changed the subject. "And by the way, what are you doing here? I know you could have broken the door down, but it's not damaged. How did you get in?"

"Your father – "

"Oh, so you went to see my father. And I suppose he gave you the key. And of course you don't need my permission to come snooping around my home, since it technically belongs to LuthorCorp, and Lionel gave you the key. Well, that all makes sense now."

"You know, Lex, Lionel may be evil, but he's been more honest with me that you have!"

"You think so? Was he honest when he sent you into the lab and then had you stuck in that isolation tank? Do you think he gave you the key to this room out of his altruistic desire for you to have all the facts? Do you have any idea how much funding he's put into researching you?"

"No," said Clark. "Why, is it more funding that you put into researching me?"

"I keep telling you, I'm done with that. For the last two years I've been trying to protect these big secrets of yours without even knowing what they are, and you repay me by breaking into the one place in my house you know I don't want you to go."

Clark shook his head. "Sorry, Lex, I just can't believe any of that. There have just been too many lies."

Lex stood away from the doorway. "You know what, Clark? That was my best shot. If you still don't trust me, get the hell out of my house. And give me that key first."