The Bachelor Chapter 6
Draco Malfoy slid comfortably into the large bed, his mind on the events of the early evening—namely, the rose ceremony.
He knew perfectly well that he had just subjected himself to much torture from family and friends at Hogwarts. First off, it was this whole bloody show. He thought angrily of Narcissa and how she'd practically forced him to apply. Draco, honey, what a marvelous idea this is! You're perfect for this! And it had come as no surprise when he had been picked—it was merely a pleasure to date twenty-five women at once. Draco had been positive that nobody was better than him for the part, and he had been right.
Then again, he hadn't really thought about the consequences of the show.
He was more of a one-night-stand kind of guy. In fact, he'd never had a serious relationship in his whole life. And he was just too damn lazy to work his way through every girl. He'd already decided to keep Granger till almost the end—she was bloody fun to annoy, and he might as well pick Hogwarts girls because he more or less knew them. Or at least knew some fun secrets about all of them…well, except Granger. But the rest of them had quite a bit of dirt glued to them.
He shrugged off his odd feelings about everything and consoled himself…there were ten girls here. Ten girls! That was twenty boobs! He could live with this. Easily. He fell asleep dreaming of twenty dancing boobs.
Hermione lay awake, plotting revenge against Malfoy. She had to get him back, of course, but the question was…how? Embarrassing him on public television was quite easy, but it just wasn't that appealing. Well, telling the world of his animal escapades (here she smirked, thinking of ferret like abilities) wouldn't exactly be a drag, but she could surely think of something better.
Like the time she'd caught him snogging Goyle in the broom closet.
Well, he had screamed in shock and shoved Goyle's head into the wall. And he'd claimed that he had been under the impression that it was Pansy. Which was quite believable, as it had been dark. But she could just leave all of that out of the story and make it a real eye-opener.
She smiled wickedly as she felt her eyes closing. Perhaps this trip wasn't all that bad.
The next day, Hermione was rudely awakened by a certain Lavender Brown. "Get up," she commanded. "Kathy's telling us what'll happen and stuff in ten minutes."
Hermione groaned and rolled over. "Can't you just tell me afterwards?" she said, moaning into her pillow.
"No! We won't have time to come up. Anyway, I think she's telling us who's going on the next date and such."
"Damn." Hermione rolled out of bed and stomped her way to the bathroom. Ten minutes later, she emerged, wearing plain robes and her hair up in a drab bun. She liked to think she was balancing it all out from all the gold-diggers around her.
When she reached the living room, it was abuzz with hormonal activity. Girls were shrieking and squealing as usual, but Hermione couldn't see any reason for them to be.
"What's going on?" she asked Hannah Abbot, who was standing next to her.
"Oh, Mione! You have to see this! Omigosh!" Hannah said, eyes sparkling. Before Hermione could ask who-what-why, Hannah thrust something into her hands.
Hermione realized that she was holding a stack of photographs. "Whose pictures are these?" she asked warily. No way in hell she was looking at something these girls were so crazy about…what if it was Malfoy naked or something?
"They're Draco's baby pictures!" Hannah exclaimed happily. "Kathy showed them to us and we've been passing them around."
Hermione turned them over to be greeted by, in fact, a very naked three-year-old Malfoy, smiling and waving happily. In one hand he clutched a tiny broomstick and in the other a model of the snitch. In spite of herself, Hermione had to laugh. "He's adorable," she said. "What went wrong?"
Hannah rolled her eyes. "No pretending to hate him, missy," she said matter-of-factly. "We all know it's a tactic so come off it."
Hermione ignored the comment as she sifted through Malfoy's pictures. He really had been a very, very cute kid. Too bad he had a personality to destroy any good qualities. Immediately.
Just then, Kathy Silver waltzed into the room. "How'd you girls like the pictures?" she asked, smiling widely.
"We love them!" some chorused. Hermione shook her head in amazement. They sounded like a bunch of little kids talking to Mickey Mouse or something…that was, until Hermione remembered that wizards would probably be afraid of Mickey Mouse.
"Well," Kathy continued. "Here's the plan for today."
Some of the girls were so excited that the pictures soon slid out of their hands and ended up on the floor. "Nothing's better than the real thing," one of them declared.
"There will be three dates again," Kathy explained. "And three different girls will get individual dates. Remember, he can only keep six of you after this round, so try your best!" With a small, deliberate wink, Kathy left the room.
The morning turned out to be a stink for Hermione. Today's topic of conversation was "how many he's had!" as one of the girls had shrieked.
"How many what has he had?" Hermione asked exasperatedly. "Non-human experiences? One right now, but believe me, it might be two by the time I'm out of here," she finished up stonily.
Parvati rolled her eyes. "Seriously, Hermione, enough with that game," she declared, as the rest of them giggled like house-elves that had had too much butterbeer. "We already know that you want him just as badly!"
Another girl cut in. "And anyway, we're talking about how many women he's had!"
Hermione stared at her, open-mouthed. If they were all vying for him, why exactly did they want to know how many girls he'd buggered?
"Kathy told us that she knows the exact number," Blaise cut in excitedly. "We're all going to guess and see whoever got the closest guess. It'll be fun, no?" she asked, her eyes twinkling with anticipation.
"That's your idea of a game?" Hermione asked incredulously.
Hannah rolled her eyes. "It's a fun way to pass time, Mione," she said lightly. "Hmm…I guess maybe nine."
"Nine!" screamed another girl. "I think more like twenty! Who wouldn't want to bugger him?"
"Twenty's amateurish," cut in Millicent. "I think he's really mature. I think he's probably only had two or three."
In spite of her reluctance to the game, Hermione snorted. "Two or three?" she asked, almost hiccupping with laughter. "Oh, no. Multiply it by four or five and then you've got the number."
For the rest of the game, Millicent did not participate, as she was very busy trying to multiply two and four, then two and five, then three and four, and then three and five.
After what seemed like ages, a date box finally arrived. "Open it!" commanded Lavender, her voice low with nervousness.
"Hermione," one of the girls gushed, "You've never opened a box. You do the honors."
Hermione shrugged and moved sluggishly towards the date box. "Okay," she said dully. "It's for…Hannah, Blaise, Trinity, and Xandy." The four girls looked at each other, slightly disappointed.
"It's the four-person date," sighed Xandy. "That means we each get less time with Draco."
"Well, at least you get time with him," Hermione said dryly, unsympathetic to the girls' woes. "And Blaise gets the individual date."
Blaise smiled wildly while the other girls looked down, biting their lips in an effort not to cry.
"Where's the date to?" Hannah asked sullenly.
"Um…all four of you are going to the beach with him…and then Blaise will have dinner with him on a yacht."
"On a yacht!" Blaise screamed excitedly. "Oh, gosh, girls, what am I going to wear?"
Hermione noticed that the mood in the group had turned quite drastically. The girls still feigned happiness when someone else got a good date, but jealousy was slowly beginning to show its true colors.
"Why don't you wear a tiara," Millicent spat angrily. "Since you're acting like a princess and all."
Blaise looked shocked. "Excuse me?" she asked slowly, as if just comprehending what Millicent had said.
"I said, why don't you just wear a tiara, since you're acting like a princess and all," Millicent explained patiently.
"Oh." Blaise stood still for almost a full minute before coming back with a retort of her own. "Well, at least I'm not fat."
Hermione looked down and bit her lip in a failing effort not to laugh. The insult was priceless, really.
Millicent gasped, along with the other eight girls following the cat fight. "You know," she said angrily. "I have had a problem with you since day one."
"Oh, my gosh," whispered Hannah from the sides. "Girl, you tell her."
Hermione had no idea what side Hannah was on but she did know that if she didn't intervene, things were going to get a little ugly.
"Stop," she commanded, but neither paid her any attention.
Blaise was staring at Millicent with daggers in her eyes. "Well, he hated your stupid outfit the other day."
"He said it was bright!"
"That's because he's too nice to tell you what he really thought."
"You bitch!"
"Oh, my, gosh. You did not just call me that," screamed Blaise.
Millicent pulled a curler out of her hair and threw it at Blaise. It hit her squarely in the jaw. "Ouch!" yelled Blaise. Millicent smiled smugly.
Hermione had had enough of it. She quickly went to her room and came back with her wand. Pointing it at Blaise's jaw, she swiftly healed the cut, and then pointed it towards Millicent.
"Millicent," she said crossly. "Apologize, or I'll hex you."
Millicent apparently knew about Hermione's powers with the wand, because she shuffled her feet, and looking down at the floor, apologized. "Sorry Blaise," she muttered.
"Now, Blaise, why don't you apologize," Hermione said, annoyed.
Blaise also looked down to the floor and muttered a quick apology.
All at once, the immediate silence that had filled the room dissolved, and the girls were clamoring around Hermione. "You're so brave!" one of them screeched happily.
"You're our hero," another complimented.
"Girls, group hug!" yelled Lavender, and Hermione began to feel rather claustrophobic as the girls surrounded her, their arms outstretched.
Nevertheless, they were beginning to grow on her.
A/N: A massive thanks to all reviewers! I really appreciate it!
Recommended fics:
A Post Hogwarts Affair by burgundyred. It's light hearted and very interesting; awesome plot-line.
Arithmetic Love by Bloaty Kitsune. It's just started out so I can't say too much, but it's got some really funny bits!
The Hijacking of Hermione Granger by Plastraa. I love the plot-line, and it's funny!
Well that's it for this time! I've got a few more next time…hehe, I love burgundyred, I might give you a few more of her fics! And I have some others I really like too. Which I will tell you next time. Reviews would be massively appreciated! Thanks!