Eesh. This chapter is a little weird. It's a typical PerpleXed ending. Not quite happy and not quite sad. This is partly due to the fact that it is four and I am slightly drunk myself and pulling an all-nighter. Note that slightly drunk isn't intoxicated. Really. I just wanna finish this damn thing. Ugh.
Let's play 'How creeped out am I?' The TV is playing and they just started talking about the song in this chapter. And it's like 10 years old and wasn't ever that popular. Creepy rating: 7.
Another warning: this sort of has gross bodily functions in it, but it was necessary. I would never just throw icky stuff in. I didn't go into detail either. Because that's ick.
Hey Jealousy is The Gin Blossom's, not mine. Digimon characters aren't mine either. Plus I mutilate them and such. Double ick.
I Melt With You
/Tell me do you think it'd be alright/
/If I could just crash here tonight/
/As you see I'm in no shape for drivin'/
/And anyway I've got no place to go/
/And you know it might not be that bad/
/You were the best I ever had/
/I hadn't blown the whole thing years ago/
/I might not be alone/
/Tomorrow we can drive around this town/
/And let the cops chase us around/
/The past is gone but something might be found to take its place/
/Hey jealousy/
/Hey jealousy/
/Hey jealousy/
/Hey jealousy/
The last couple months had taken their toll on seventeen-year-old Kari. Her once-perfect grades were slipping, she had quit the cheerleading squad, and even was beginning to lose interest in spending time with her friends. It was clear that she had fallen into a bit of a slump, and everyone knew the cause: Matt.
If she wasn't over him, she hid it well. Never spoke of him in conversation, didn't spend any time mournfully pouring over souvenirs from their relationship, hardly even blinked when she heard he had gotten back together with Sora, face didn't show a hint of emotion when, two months later, she learned they were engaged. It was as if Matt Ishida had simply dropped out of Kari's life and she didn't even notice.
This worked well on the inside. Sure, something had cried out inside when her family got the wedding invitation in the mail, but she put that to rest quickly, preferring to think that somehow their separation was of some fault to him. But there's a limit to how much you can lie to yourself. At the end of the day, she knew it had been entirely of her doing and she couldn't change that. So what good would it do to dote?
And dote she did not. A new hobby rose like a phoenix from the ashes of the break-up. Regardless of what it had done to her last time, the girl was turning to alcohol more and more. Wasn't quite dependant yet; a shot here, a beer there, but it was becoming more and more inevitable. She made new friends easily, slipping in with the partying crowd, much to the disappointment of her old friends.
As for romantic relationships, her love life was nonexistent. It would have been easy to turn and ask Davis out, after all, she had lost her first real love for him. But that seemed too… clichéd. She dated around for a while; anonymous guys with names she could barely even remember, but after a while it became devastatingly clear to her: Matt was her one and only.
Speaking of clichés, that was the big one.
One and only.
It seemed so unlikely: over six billion people in the world and only one you're actually compatible with? But as the weeks passed, she began to understand the phrase more and more.
It was safe to say that she was stuck on him.
So that October night, shortly after the start of her Senior year of high school, she decided - for about the hundredth time - to wash him out with some more gin.
A weak smile crossed her lips as she listened to the boy tell his story; what was his name again? Something with a D. Doug? Dan? What did it matter? Her fingers tightened around the paper cup in her hand, causing the sides to crease a little; the clear contents of the cup surged up to meet her, if only slightly. Still, she couldn't bring herself to take another sip: her stomach was at the back of her throat and moving fast.
The boy at the wheel, Dan-or-Doug finished his tale, causing the others in the car to explode into laughter. Kari watched as the car veered over to the center line of the road, wondering how much he'd had to drink that night.
She shut her eyes tightly while checking to make sure her seatbelt was secured across her body; it felt like her stomach was rising slowly, bile tickling the back of her throat. "Are we," her small voice cut the air suddenly, interrupting a conversation the two girls in the seat next to her were having, "Are we almost there?"
"Almost where?" asked Toni, the girl sitting next to her who now wore a worried look on her eerily pale face.
"To my car," Kari answered, struggling to remember as her stomach surged, "It's… it's… oh God, can we pull over here? I'm not feelin' too hot…"
The dark-haired boy in the seat in front of her cracked a joke about her appearance, but Dan-or-Doug seemed to be more sympathetic. He quickly jerked the steering wheel to the right and turned the car into a large parking lot, reassuring her that they were there.
Immediately after the car rolled to a stop, Kari flew out the door, heading for the building. She wanted to vomit in the parking lot, but even drunk, she didn't want to make that big of a mess. Her vision blurred, she didn't even look up at her surroundings as she dashed through the double doors, scanned the room quickly for a restroom, and kept running.
And it was not until she was already safe inside the bathroom stall that Kari realized where she was, what she had seen in the other room. The movie theater. The bathroom. The stall. The same one in which she and Matt had exchanged I-love-yous. Had she really parked the car there? Details seemed to be slipping her mind like an old woman's lately.
Of course, her first instinct was to look for the carvings on the wall, but the bile rising in her throat would not have that. She fell to her knees, emptying the contents of her stomach into the foul-smelling porcelain bowl. Once her stomach had finished convulsing, wiped her mouth on the back of her hand, standing up slowly to the slight comfort one feels after vomiting. Her eyes instantly began searching the graffitied bathroom wall.
It didn't take long to find it; she had written pretty big. And it was still there. Untouched an intact. 'I LOVE YOU' With a quavering hand, she reached out and traced it with a finger. It all seemed so stupid now, this childish act. Her initials up there next to Matt's. The locket with the date on it, now lying forgotten under her bed. All for nothing.
In what she knew was a vain attempt, she dragged a fingernail across the message, hoping to somehow scratch it off of the wall and out of her mind. She succeeded only in breaking the tip of her nail off.
Suddenly remembering the others in the car, Kari quickly washed her hands and jogged back out to the parking lot. Her brown eyes scanned the parking lot quickly; a fruitless search. She stepped off the curb and squinted, trying to spot Dan-or-Doug's easily distinguishable beat-up orange four-door. As she searched, she didn't notice a greasy-looking man approach her. "Excuse me, miss?"
Kari shrieked from the surprise, whirling around to face him. "Yes?"
"You are Kari?"
"How do you know?" she asked, voice shaking.
The man smiled; he was missing teeth. Something about her - yes, it was safe to say it was the teeth - creeped her out about him. "Your friends. They send me to tell you they have to be home. They say your car is here and they sorry and will call you tomorrow."
"Shit!" she cried, realizing her situation. She couldn't drive like this, it felt like she was going to throw up again any minute. Her house was almost an hour away from this theater by car. Desperately, she checked her pockets for any loose change that could prospectively become a subway ticket: nothing.
She looked back up to the man, "Thanks for the message."
"Oh, it no problem for me," he said cheerfully, disappearing back into the dark from which he had come from.
Kari walked back to her car, weighing her options: Izzy would probably be the closest to here, at half an hour away. But half an hour? Her head spun, there was no way she'd be able to drive like this all the way to Izzy's. Blowing all the air out of her mouth, she opened the door and sunk inside, trying to avoid the inevitable.
Matt.
His new apartment was less than ten minutes from the theater. Still not safe, but a lot more so than driving all the way to Izzy's. With lead in her heart, Kari turned the key in the ignition, shifted the car into gear, and drove off, dreading her destination more and more with each mile.
/You can trust me not to drink/
/And not to sleep around/
/And if you don't expect too much from me/
/You might not be let down/
/Cause all I really want's to be with you/
/And feel like I matter too/
/If I didn't blow the whole thing years ago/
/I might be here with you/
/Tomorrow we can drive around this town/
/And let the cops chase us around/
/The past is gone but something might be found to take it's place/
Hearing a knock on his door, Matt looked at the digital clock on his nightstand groggily: 1:32? Who would be visiting at 1:32? TK, the thought immediately jumped to his mind, TK's hurt. Or Sora. Or Dad. He lumbered out of bed and pulled on a tshirt, walking slowly out into the living room to answer the door.
His blue eyes widened in shock as he surveyed the person standing in front of him.
It wasn't TK.
It wasn't Sora.
It wasn't his dad.
It was Kari.
"What are you doing here?" he hissed, clutching his arms in an attempt to keep warm.
She seemed to ponder this question for a moment, "Drunk. I'm drunk. I can't drive home like this."
A scowl crept across his face, "You drove here."
"It wasn't that far. You know how far away my house is."
He folded his arms, leaning against the doorframe, "Drinking, eh? You do that a lot now?"
"Some."
"Because, as we all know, you've had such good experiences in the past with it…"
"Shut up, Matt."
"…and it's helped you out so much…"
"I said shut up. Like it wasn't any of your fault."
At this, he blew all the air out of his mouth, taking a step away from the door and towards her, "I never did anything and you know it."
"Oh come on!" She cried, stepping back, "You did it, too! I mean - you were at college!"
"For, like, two days!"
She took another step back, knowing it was true. Knowing everything was her fault. "I know I never got to say this," her voice was soft, vulnerable, "but I'm sorry. Truly, I am."
"You broke my heart," he said flatly, as if there was nothing else to it.
Regaining her degree of sass, Kari took a step forward now, "You seemed to have moved on quickly."
"Leave me out of this."
She sighed, "I know, I guess that was… stupid, I don't know. But listen, my friends ditched me and I don't think I can make it home, you wanna help out?"
"Um, I don't know, I mean…"
"But can I ask a question?" she asked, looking directly at him. Same old Matt. A different haircut, maybe, it was a little shorter in the front. But other than that, he hadn't changed a bit. Obviously, she reminded herself, The changing one is you.
He returned the gaze, "Yeah?"
"Do you love her?"
Matt had meant to answer straight away, but his brain made him pause. Did he love her? Love was such a general word, it could mean a lot of things… "Well," he heard himself saying, "I don't know if…"
"Did you love me?"
This time his brain wanted to answer right away. Say something romantic, sweep her off her feet again. But something told him that wasn't going to happen. Silence is better, just don't say anything.
Kari waited expectantly for a moment, then rolled her eyes and spoke again, "Okay then. Is your couch still open to me?"
"Alright," he said at last, "You can come in."
Part of her wanted to give him a kiss, a hug, a word of thanks, but something told her that wasn't necessary. Matt stepped aside, clearing the doorway and she gathered her courage, took a deep breath, and stepped inside.
/Hey jealousy/
/Hey jealousy/
/Hey jealousy/
/Hey jealousy/
/Tomorrow we can drive around this town/
/And let the cops chase us around/
/The past is gone but something might be found to take it's place/
/Hey jealousy/
/Hey jealousy/
/Listen to my heart/
/There's only one thing I can start/
Okay, since they haven't taken my computer yet, but I'm guessing it's coming soon, I'll have to put this up today. I know it's stupid and I won't get any reviews on last chapter, but I just wanna get this damn thing over and done with.
Cliffhanger-esque, I suppose. Make up your own mind on if they get back together or not. I'd give my opinion but that would be stupid since I'm the author and I wrote it.
This didn't turn out as good as I hoped, but when you think about it, nothing much ever really does. If you want to be technical, this is the only chapter that's actually a songfic, since I based the idea on the song. But the 'trust me not to drink and not to sleep around' just fell into place. The idea of getting drunk and having to crash at an ex-lover's house was from the song 'Hey Jealousy' by the Gin Blossoms.
The story itself turned out better than I thought it would, but I think my favorite is still Two Days. That Summer will likely be on hiatus for a while.
-EIK!! The guy just called and said he's on his way to take the modem!! Time to cut this short AND NOW.-
Anyways, dear readers, it's been fun. Hope to be back soon.
Moving forward using all my breath
Making love to you was never second best
I saw the world thrashing all around your face
Never really knowing it was always mesh and lace
I'll stop the world and melt with you
You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time
There's nothing you and I won't do
I'll stop the world and melt with you
Dream of better lives the kind which never hate
Dropped in the moment of imaginary grace
I made a pilgrimage to save this human race
Never comprehending a race that long gone by
I'll stop the world and melt with you
You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time
There's nothing you and I won't do
I'll stop the world and melt with you
The future's open wide
The future's open wide
I'll stop the world and melt with you
I've seen some changes but it's getting better all the time
There's nothing you and I won't do
I'll stop the world and melt with you
These things go by
- I Melt With You
Modern English
LATE BREAKING NEWS!! As I am in edit, we're not cancelling the interent! This was all for nothing!! Yay, I haven't slept in over 24 hours!