Summary: Complications turning Vash in, Inepril all over again?
Thoughts, Author's notes, emphasis, title inspired by the Ice Cream song by Sarah MacLachlan.
Disclaimer: I wish I owned Trigun. That's as far as it goes. :(
Pre-Story Notes: I suck at writing gunfights ::sobs:: And when did I get so boring?! ::sobs again:: Erm, anyway, I took some liberties with Knives and Milly... You'll see.
angelarms: ::glomps reviewer:: Aww, you're so nice! Thankies for reviewing all my chapters. And here, an update!
Joshua Glass: And here's more! ::cheers for Vash and Meryl too:: YAYRAH!
SapphireWhiteTiggress: ::glomps reviewer:: You have no idea how happy your question made me! I meant to answer it today, but I rambled on... so... Bwaha you'll just have to wait for the next chapter!
Roganu-chan: ... uh, here you go! ::steps away::
Cherry Blossom Princess2: ::glomps reviewer:: thankies for you too for looking at all this stuff! And look, new chappie!
Puchiko2: ::bows:: Thank you, thank you. My characters flow. That's awesome. I tried to keep it un-boring...
Neptune Butterfly: :] I am pleased that you have been appeased. That kitty is one devious feline, he is. He's SORT OF your muse, eh? I don't have a muse besides... Vash. And Meryl. Hmm... So corny=funny? Well, this chappies really "funny" then XD
Pyro: XD Staccato?! XD XD XD Thank you for amusing me today. O.O Not fast enough? Oh, sorry... Uh... uh... ::runs far away for protection and gets Meryl's megaphone:: SORRY! I HAVE AN UPDATE NOW, IS THAT OKAY?!
Milly yawned and rubbed her blurry eyes. She pulled down a sleeve to look at her watch.
7:35 am.
"Girls?" She called out. "Girls, it's morning!"
Meryl groaned and groggily scowled, working out the kinks in her neck and massaging her shoulders. Divi yawned and stretched out, empty derringers and the black cat falling off of her skirt. The girls were all tired, as they should have been from their ordeal the night before.
-- Begin Flashback --
Meryl stood ready with her hands near her hidden derringers, as did Milly with her secret large stungun. Divi sat nervously in the driver's seat with her foot ready to hit the gas pedal of the still running jeep.
There was so little light, and not any of the girls could tell how many bandits there were. Milly probably had about 30 shots and Meryl had her 50, that should be well enough, right? Bandits didn't move around in herds, did they?
"Surround them." The leader commanded. Feet on the sand shuffled and pistols cocked. "Kill the engine," he commanded Divi. "Get out of the car. Put your hands up, all of you girls." The three girls stood back to back to back and tried to look around them. Slowly their eyes adjusted to the darkness and they saw faint outlines of the intruding men. "Alright men," the leader grinned. "Take anything you want –But that feisty woman is mine."
Something inside Meryl snapped. Maybe it was the situation -a man wanting to take advantage of a good woman -or something else that oddly enough reminded Meryl of her frustration with Vash. It wasn't that Vash had taken advantage of her, it was that he didn't... Okay, well, Meryl recently tried to make it obvious that she cared for the infamous outlaw, that she would stay by his side and never run away even if her life depended on it. And what did he repay her with for her kindness? He made fun of her. He continued to annoy the hell out of her. That fool wouldn't know a good woman if one hit him on the head, and she did, several times! He just never got the point. No, that dork never showed appreciation for the strong, noble, virtuous Meryl. That dork went after women dressed in brightly colored plastic wrap.
"Men..." Meryl growled underneath her breath. Both Milly and Divi could feel the anger fermenting inside the small woman. "You underestimate us," Meryl called out to the leader. She reached inside her cape and pulled out a derringer.
The men readied to fire, but took another look.
The leader laughed. "What? You plan to take me out with that wimpy-looking toy?"
This is no toy, Meryl thought angrily. I'll prove it. "Yes." The men laughed. Meryl fired.
Now gunless and silent the leader stared in awe for a moment. Then all hell broke loose.
Milly whipped out her stungun and took down the men on her side, and Meryl continued to disarm the men on her side. Divi took one of Meryl's slings and started to deal with the men facing her. That girl has more to her than meets the eye... Meryl thought, amazed at how well the girl was performing. I didn't even feel it detach! The three females became one living, breathing unit -watching out for each other, reading intuitively the body language and reacting accordingly. [Even the kitty played its part, freaking out the bandits who dared to get close to the car and giving them a quick swipe at the face with its extended claws.]
Even still with the silent warnings from the other girls, a bullet glanced off Meryl's left shoulder, barely missing Divi's head. Despite the pain Meryl kept firing and soon the once great army of bandits dissolved, overtaken easily when they were taken by surprise by the three skillful girls.
Those three sank to their knees and rested against the jeep; hands, arms and breaths trembling with a yet to be calmed excitement.
"Is everyone okay?" Divi asked through gasps.
"I need some –gauze. I got hit in the shoulder." Meryl heaved.
"Meryl?" Milly asked worriedly. Divi groaned as she got up to get the first aid kit.
"It's nothing." Meryl tried to reassure. "It just glanced off -nothing else."
After the wound had been treated and dressed [the girls realized just how fortunate they were to have only Meryl harmed], Divi asked "Do you think they'll come back?"
Meryl groaned. "They've already learned their lesson. We've still got enough to teach them again if they're stupid enough to come back." Just barely, Meryl thought. Not enough for the government... it never was. But I won't give up. I have to get him back.
-- End Flashback --
"How long will it take to get there?" Meryl asked, replacing her bandage.
"Probably 4 hours." Divi answered.
"4 hours? By the car? At your speed? I thought you said it would only take 10 hours to walk there."
"Okay, fine, so I can't measure time. It's still 4 hours to get there --by car --at my speed."
"We should get going, then." Meryl sighed. If you're not there, Vash... after all that I've been through... I'm going to be really pissed off.
"This is the real Vash the Stampede!" Lani yelled at the woman sitting serenely in the front desk of the main government building.
"Yes, I'm sure of that." The woman replied robotically. "But I'm afraid the government needs more verification than just your word."
"I--"
"60 billion double dollars is a large amount of money the government cannot give freely unless we have complete and valid verification that the tied-up, spiky-haired skinny blond in your possession is the real Vash the Stampede." The woman glared over her black-framed glasses at the leather clad woman.
Lani hung her head in defeat. "Alright," she began civilly. "What sort of verification do we need?"
"At least 3 authentic witnesses from either or both July and Augusta, and/or those 2 girls that the Bernardelli Insurance Society sent out to watch over him." Vash looked up and almost laughed at the irony. "But by the looks of it they haven't been doing their job." The woman added, speaking to herself and shaking her head.
Although he was forced into leaving the girls this time, Vash still felt bad. The girls tried hard enough to keep him safe, this wasn't fair for them. They'll come for me soon, I know it. He thought confidently.
Wait.
If they did come for him... they would actually be helping his abductors get the $$60 billion they didn't deserve if they verified his identity.
That was bad.
"How are you going to believe me if I get those three witnesses?" Lani questioned, still peeved over not getting her money.
"You need not get them yourself. We have our own." The front desk lady replied.
"Oh, great! Things are finally turning out for the better! Can we get them to prove the guy I have is the real Vash the Stampede?"
"I'm sorry," the woman apologized mechanically, smiling. "They are currently unavailable, as it is their lunch break."
Lani sighed. "When are they coming back?"
The woman answered "In an hour or so."
An hour. This was one of the many, many times Vash wished the girls far, far away... but when he did they showed up at the worst of times and places...
Lani heaved a great sigh and sat next to the silent and thus worrisome gunman.
15 minutes later the front doors opened and 2 men walked in, dragging a whining, scared blond man tied up and duct taped.
"We forgot duct tape," Lani told her brothers.
"Yeah. That would have been useful." Billy or Bobby replied, sighing. Vash glared silently.
"We have Vash the Stampede!" One of the 2 men who walked in announced.
"What?!" Lani yelled, jumping to her feet. "We have Vash the Stampede!"
"I'm sure you're mistaken." The other new man said.
That poor man doesn't even look remotely like me. Vash thought, looking at the duct taped blond sympathetically.
"No matter who the real Vash the Stampede is, the both of you shall have to wait for verification." The desk lady explained calmly.
10 minutes later a rough looking man with a dark shadow casted over his face by a downward pointing black cowboy hat entered through the main doors, pulling along an unconscious, beaten-up man in a straitjacket. The unconscious man was skinny, tall and blond, but still not remotely as good-looking as Vash was.
Are they just picking up any blond bandit to turn in? Vash thought worriedly.
The woman at the front desk did not seem surprised at all to find out there was yet another bounty hunter with yet another Vash the Stampede.
"I have the devil Humanoid Typhoon," the black cowboy hat man said gruffly to the front desk.
"I'm sorry but you're going to have to wait for verification with the rest of them." She pointed at the growing line of people sitting in the waiting section of the room. The black hatted man grumbled something underneath his breath, but the desk lady didn't mind nor care.
30 minutes later the door opened with a loud bang. "Filthy spiders! I command you to release me! Get your disease infested hands off of me or suffer my wrath!" That sounded familiar. Vash looked up to find a very recognizable white-haired blond being held in a death grip by 4 other men. "I am not Vash the Stampede!" He growled.
"Shuddup. We seen yur fancy gun tricks. We know yur Vash." One of the men said.
"How dare you compare me to that worthless, incapable, bumbling idiot not worthy of being a member of a superior species?!"
"Knives!" Vash yelled, smiling widely at his brother. Knives turned his head as best he could and groaned. Then, in realization, blinked and laughed his usual evil laugh. "Where's your puny spider to save you now, brother?! Bwahahaha!"
Lani leaned over to Vash. "Good looks and weirdness run in the family?" She asked with an eyebrow raised.
The door opened again and the lady at the front desk stood up to take a look. An expression of relief washed over her blank stare. "Will the real Vash the Stampede please stand up?" XD
All of the bounty hunters forced their prey onto their feet. (Somehow the man wearing the black cowboy hat managed to make it appear as if his unconscious bounty stood by holding up a strap on the straitjacket.) 3 people walked in -1 man and 2 women. Of those women 1 looked very familiar in her purple dress and big bows.
"Elizabeth!" Vash cried out, an expression of joy on his face.
The door opened again.
Elizabeth looked at him in horror. "Elizabeth, my love! You've come to save me! You can get me out of here, right? I'll do anything for you, ANYTHING!" Vash pleaded, on his knees groveling in front of the female plant engineer.
"I'm so sorry, but--" Elizabeth began before Knives' evil laughter cut her off.
"You are so screwed now, Vash!" Knives laughed psychotically.
Vash turned his head toward the door and found a very, very pissed-off Meryl. Oh... Crap, he thought. Time to grovel in front of someone else. "Insurance girl!" Oops, wrong thing to say. Her expression worsened tenfold and her right hand twitched dangerously close to her cape. Vash wormed his way to her, put on his best starry eyes and knelt before her. "You've come to rescue me!"
She glared at him and he laughed nervously.
"Actually, I'm afraid I can't do that, Mr. Vash the Stampede..." She tried to cross her arms but winced at the pain in her left shoulder.
"What happened to your shoulder?!" Vash shouted after noticing her wince and finding the reddened gauze. He bolted upright and his rope bindings miraculously fell off. "Who did that to you?! I'll kill him!!"
"Oh really, Vash?" Knives smirked.
Vash turned around, annoyed. "I was exaggerating, Knives."
Alarms rang off. The lady at the front desk pushed the security button after so many people (especially the insurance girl) confirmed that the goofy looking blond in red was truly Vash the Stampede.
"Oh." Said the goofy looking blond in red. "Crap." He turned on his heel toward the exit, picked up the surprised short woman by her waist, slung her over his shoulder, and ran like there was no tomorrow.
"Idiot," Knives huffed after a short period of stunned silence from everyone in the main government building. Agents from nowhere filled the room and poured out the building in pursuit of the Humanoid Typhoon.
More stunned silence.
Lani raised her hand. "I found him first!" She declared.
As if having the government agents chase him and an insurance girl pound on his back wasn't bad enough, a voice on the citywide intercom announced "Vash the Stampede is inside the city! I repeat: Vash the Stampede is loose inside our city!" And so the entire population of Farland started coming after him.
"DAMN IT!" He cried (literally), picking up speed in his already fast sprint.
"VASH!" Meryl screamed, trying to pound harder on his back to get his attention. "Put me down!"
It was probably a bad idea for him to stop to put her down, but with his hand clutching her butt it was just a teeny bit uncomfortable for Meryl.
Vash turned the corner into an empty street and slowed down to a stop. He gently placed the small woman back onto her feet, then he sat down on the ground, taking in heaving gasps. "Must... stop..."
"Uh, Vash? They're still chasing us, you know that...?" Meryl asked anxiously.
Vash looked up at her. "They're chasing me."
"We still have to go." She extended her hands out to him.
"No, you stay here," he said, letting her pull him up (with great effort). "You stay safe here," he panted. "I'll come find you later, I promise."
She sighed. "Vash, I don't--"
Then he kissed her.
"Are you sure you want to go in?" Milly asked worriedly. "It sounds like a citywide riot in there!"
Divi and Milly waited outside the fortressed city, hearing the ebb and flow of shouting voices calling out Vash's name.
"I don't know," Divi sighed. "It sounds like they're having fun in there." She said sarcastically. "I'm getting tired of waiting. I thought she'd be back by now, but obviously she had some trouble." Divi jumped out of her jeep. "Ms. Milly, can you drive when we come back out?"
Milly nodded. "Be safe, Ms. Divi!"
"I'll try." Divi waved back as she ran to the large entrance doors. She pushed in one successfully. "I guess even the guards are going after Vash," she said out loud. She walked inside the tumultuous city and smiled. "Lord..." She began. "Please let me make it out of here alive."
It was at that same exact moment a certain golden-blond gunman made the same exact prayer.
"Why do you people always have rocket launchers?!" Vash cried, in near hysterics as a building exploded behind him. These events eerily echoed that of Inepril City.
"I shouldn't have kissed her," he giggled to himself as he ran top speed away from the heavily armed mob behind him. "She's gonna kill me when I get out." Another rocket flew over his head and more large pieces of building came falling down above his head. "If I make it out of here alive!" He shrieked like a frightened schoolgirl and jumped side to side, avoiding the fallen debris.
Vash turned the corner again and the narrow streets were no longer narrow. He had run into a large, open-air, grassless field where he met face to face with another angry mob. His ears picked up the sounds of trampling feet of many, many people behind him. He was trapped.
"Oh, shi--"
"DAAAAADDIIIEEEE!" Vash turned to his right to see Divi flying at him.
"Don't shoot!" Shouted one of the city dwellers. "You'll hit the child!"
Vash sighed after being tackled to the ground. "That was a really stupid move, Divi."
Divi groaned. "Come on, dad, lighten up."
"Didn't you hear her?! She's the devil spawn of Vash the Stampede!" Shouted another resident.
Vash sighed again. "See?"
"Listen to me, citizens of Farland! Put down your weapons!" A megaphone boomed over the raucous crowd. Meryl's megaphone. With her amplified voice. She can hide many things underneath that magical cape, can't she? She managed to clear a small path as she screamed at the people. "The Bernardelli Insurance Society cannot pay any claims you make on property which you yourselves have wrought destruction! Please stop trying to destroy Vash the Stampede. Your lives and property are on the line!"
Someone in the crowd shouted "She's in league with the Stampede! Get her!"
Meryl growled and got in his face. "I am a representative of the Bernardelli Insurance Society and I'm warning you that my company will not pay for property that was damaged by you rocket-launching idiots because you were chasing around Vash the Stampede!" She yelled at him, still using the megaphone to amplify her voice.
The crowd fell silent.
"Is that true?!" A woman shouted from the middle of the mob.
"Yes, ma'am, it's true. It's written in the Bernardelli Policy in clause 42.3974 that 'properties damaged by misuse or owner or owners therein forfeit the right to claim any property damage insured by the Bernardelli Insurance Society'!"
The crowd pondered that for a while.
Then someone shouted "HEY! He's getting away!"
Vash had to laugh. Meryl had managed to both distract the angry city dwellers with her insurance legalese and clear the path for him and Divi (his newly declared devil spawn daughter).
God, he loved that insurance girl.
What I meant to say at the end of chapter three was that I've drawn a picture of Divi on my website if anyone wants to see. Check out my profile because FF.net won't let me post up my website thingie ; It's under Media/Images.
Yep. 3 choices: a pencil sketch in Roughs, you know what's in the Inked, and a spiffy GIMP-colored pic is in the Originals. Yay.