A/N- I was typing this chapter, thinking about how crummy it is that I only got two reviews. I even had a little author's note typed up about how ya didn't make it, but then as I was preparing to upload the new chapter I checked the reviews (can't ever be careful enough) and had another! Huzzah! Double update for you!

Alteng- Gimli has certainly never had a lightbulb, poor chap. You didn't watch TV? I don't watch much, mostly reruns. Especially Full House and Boy Meets World. Yeah, I know... but I love them.

The Hobbit Lass- Odd that you should do that... you'll see why in a while. But yes, before I saw ROTK I was making Pippin the star. Then the third movie came out and Sam suddenly looked a whole lot better than he had before. Dunno why.

crazy-haldir-fancier- I love Haldir! He's so coool. With three O's. I used to think he was a wannabe Legolas, but then I decided Legolas was a wannabe Haldir. Yeah.
So Gimli left Rivendell in secrecy. Perhaps a day after he left, Thranduil requested a meeting with his son.

"Leggy," he said slowly.

"Yes Daddy?"

"I've got good news, and then I've got great news!"

"What's the good news, Daddy?" Legolas asked.

Thranduil grinned. "I've just saved a bunch of money on my rider's insurance by switching to Geiko!"

Legolas smiled for the first time since Gimli had left and clapped his hands together. "Congratulations, Daddy! What could possibly be better than that?"

Thranduil bounced up and down in his chair with excitement. Or maybe he just had to pee.

"What is it?" Legolas demanded.

"I have a surprise for you! But first, you must answer one question. If you answer correctly, you win the great prize behind door number one!"

"Ooh! Ooh! Ask the question!"

"Alright... here's your question. Would you like... to be... married?"

Legolas blinked. "Er..."

His father prompted him a little, nodding.

"Yyyyyyes...?" It wasn't a lie.

"Congratulations! You win!" Thranduil cried, throwing open the door.

Legolas gasped.

A beautiful elf maiden stood there, smiling harder than Legolas had ever seen anyone smile.

Thranduil smiled too. "This is the lovely, lovely young lady... Marie Sue! Congratulations again, Leggy!" he said, then left.

Legolas stared at the girl.

She smiled.

Stare.

Smile.

"Umm... hi?"

The girl bowed to the floor.

"N-no... get up... I have to leave."

Mary Sue stood up.

Legolas, more than a little freaked out, ran after his father. "Daddy? DADDYYYY!"

"What's wrong, Leggy?"

"I... I can't marry her."

Smoke poured out of Thranduil's ears.

Literally.

"You will marry her! Tomorrow! So there!" Thranduil bellowed, and he stalked off.

"GANDAAAAAAAALF!" Legolas whined, running for the stables.