Aw, so much love! I feel all fuzzy inside. Okay, enough of that. I really loved your reviews. Here are my shout outs to you:
bobtheheadlesschicken: Yeah, that would be weird. I'll see if I can fit that line somewhere, if you'd like. And it's nice to see Logan so emotional, even if he is sad. Awwwww! Don't worry, he'll be better soon, though not angry. J Thanks for reviewing!
todd fan: Can I snuggle with you? Okay, that was just plain weird. No wait, I wanna snuggle Logan too! Anyway, I'm glad you like it so much! Here's more to come! Thanks!
Rogue14: Poor Logan. He's the last person who'd want to be accused as a cross dresser! And if you did, those would probably be your last words. Heehee! Here's another chappie, hope it's soon enough. Thanks for the reviews! Oh, and don't worry. There's still more funny coming your way!
The Uncanny R-Man: I'm glad you like it! Sad parts can be as good as funny parts, too. Oh yeah, that scene just came over me as I was writing the shout outs. Weird timing, uh? There's plenty of action coming. The rescue will probably be in the next chapter . . . or the one after that. I dunno, it's comin' soon. WOOHOO! Thanks a billion!
KaliAnn: Thanks for reviewing! Destruction and obliteration of living quarters comin' your way! Hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: OMG, I STILL HAVE TO DO THIS!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!! %$&%$&(%&($(%)&%(%%&%$$#%#!#$!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [Takes deep breath] Okay, where was I? Oh yeah. Don't' own anythin'. Got that? I don't' own nothin'! AAAAAAAAAAA%$#%$($%#(%#%#%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay, on to da fic, I mean foc, no I mean fic!! [tears out hair] Oh crap! Excuse me a minute. Just go ahead and read, pleeeease. - [goes off in a corner and shouts more naughty words. not really I just like to think I do sometimes.]
No, no, I'm not stressed. -
Astronaut: Uh Houston, we have a stressed author among us.
I'M NOT STRESSED!!! [TEARS - oops- tears astronaut's head off] See? Not stressed at all. -
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Chapter 8
It was early morning, and the waves crashed on the shore without any other accompaniment from the sounds of the average day soon to come. That is, except for one sound: the sound of screaming and complaining. The source? None other than Mystique.
"HELP! I don't like the ocean! Oh, look, there's a friendly dolphin! They helped the sailors in the war . . . IT'S A SHARK! It's a shark and it's not friendly! Tricky fish! Tricky fish! Oh octopus, will you come and help me? Octo – an octopus is worse than a shark. OH I HATE THIS PLANET!!"
Mystique finally managed to climb onto the rocks with an octopus still stuck to her face. She pulled it off and continued to cough and gasp as she managed the lay herself down next to Magneto. Both of them had been floating in the ocean all night and now were completely exhausted. Magneto groaned as he remembered whose fault it was that they had been stuck out there. "That little monster!" he mumbled.
Suddenly there was a ringing coming from Mystique's bag. She sat up and reached inside to pull out a very wet communicator. She quickly shook it and pressed a button to answer. "Uh, Agent . . . Mystique here." she said somewhat fearfully.
"I have lost patient with you both. Have you captured Wolverine or not?" Storm looked really exasperated by now.
Mystique still couldn't give an answer because the truth was not what Storm wanted to hear. She wanted to explain, but all she could come up with was, "Uh . . .uh . ."
Storm stopped her before she said anymore. "Consider yourselves fired and prison bound. Your incompetence is nothing short of unspeakable!" With that, she ended the transmission.
Mystique couldn't believe it. What? No! It can't be! I've never gone to jail before. I didn't even do anything wrong! No, no, no, my life is ending!
Magneto, however, had a very different reaction when he heard the news. "We're fired! Now, we do it my way!"
Mystique looked at him in surprise as he began to walk away. "Your way?" Then suddenly, it hit her. "No! Wait!" She quickly got up and ran after him.
Grand Councilor Storm stood in front of the big screen where Mystique's head had been just a few seconds ago. "It seems I have overestimated Magnetus and Mystic."
"Uh, Magneto and Mystique," corrected Sabertooth, who was standing next to her.
"Whatever!" Storm replied. "This could be your chance to redeem yourself, Captain Sabertooth. When can you leave?"
Sabertooth turned to her with a toothy smile. "Immediately."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Logan was sleeping in the woods with his book as a pillow. He soon woke up to the golden morning light. He rubbed his eyes and looked around. He was still alone. Looking at the book, he wondered how much longer he would have to stay there. His answer soon came.
There was a rustling in the bushes. Logan's first instinct was to run, but he hesitated. What if someone was in fact looking for him? Someone who was from his family. He decided to wait a few more seconds, just to see who it was.
The intruder came out of the bushes. It was Magneto, holding a plasma cannon in front of him. Now Logan thought it would be a good idea to run. But now, it was too late.
"Don't move!" Magneto warned. "Don't make me shoot you. You are expensive."
Logan was sure not to run, but as Magneto began walking towards him, he slowly stepped back. "C'mon," Magneto ushered. "Come quietly."
Logan looked around. There didn't seem to be anyone else. "I'm . . . waiting."
"For what?" Magneto asked. The he realized he had stepped on the story book. He saw the pictures.
"Family," Logan answered quietly.
"Ah! You don't have one. I made you."
Logan was surprised. So there was really nothing before Magneto. Logan felt very down-hearted. All this waiting for nothing. Then a little hope revived in him. "Maybe . . . I – could-"
"You are built to destroy. You can never belong."
He looked at his feet. So that was it? That was all Magneto had to give to him? No explanation or anything? No, that wasn't his way. The facts were the facts: Logan had nowhere to go.
"Now come quietly, and we'll take you apart."
As soon as Logan heard this, he bolted off. "No, no, no, wait, don't run! Ayi!"
As Logan ran, he remembered he had no place to go. But I can't just give myself up to Magneto! Then a thought occurred to him. He did have somewhere to go. He quickly dashed his way through the woods in the direction of Rogue's house.
Jean was sitting at the kitchen table, quietly crying over her coffee. She looked up at the clock. It was almost nine. Xavier would be there any time soon. She looked back down at her drink and began to cry some more. The day had finally come. Why had things gone so wrong? What did she do? She could take care of Rogue just fine. She wasn't perfect, but she was the one Rogue needed. And she knew despite the weird things about her, Jean still loved and would miss her sister.
When she looked up again, she saw Rogue standing in front of her all dressed. She was somewhat surprised. She didn't really want Rogue to see her crying, since in turn it might make her cry. "Rogue!" She quickly wiped away her tears. "I didn't hear you get up."
Rogue didn't answer. She just looked down at the floor, very sad. "Rogue, what's wrong?" Jean could tell Rogue was feeling upset about something besides the fact they were being separated.
"Logan left," she finally answered.
"He did?" asked Jean. She didn't feel all that heartbroken about it, but it still left her puzzled.
"It's good he's gone," Rogue added in a hurt tone. "He didn't want t' be here. We don't need 'im."
Jean knew how badly Rogue felt about it, even though she tried to cover it up. She got up from the table and went to her, placing her hands on her shoulders. "Aw, Rogue! Sometimes you try your hardest to make things right, but sometimes they just don't work out the way you want them too. Sometimes things have to change. And – maybe they change for the better. Even if-"
There was a knock on the door. Jean instinctively hugged Rogue as if to protect her. "Jean?" called a voice. "Are you there?"
Jean knew that voice, and it wasn't Xavier. It was Scott. She quickly ran to the door. "Scott?"
"I think I found you a job!" Scott said excitedly.
"You what?!"
"Old Mr. Caliban's store. But we gotta hurry!"
"Oh! Um, okay!" Jean turned from the door and ran back to Rogue. "Rogue, honey, this is really important. I'm gonna be right back, okay? Lock the door and don't answer it for anyone." She quickly kissed her on the head. "Things are finally turning around!"
She the dashed out the door and followed Scott. "Oh Scott I owe you one!"
"That's okay. You can just date me and we'll call it even!"
Just as Scott and Jean left, Logan dashed out of the woods with Magneto on his tail and shooting his cannon at him. "Come back here you little . . .!"
Rogue started to go up the stairs when she heard running steps and panting. She turned and there was Logan sliding into the hallway. He quickly looked around and saw her. "Logan?"
He ran over to her, still looking around frantically. "What is it?"
"Shh!" he quickly said. Just then he heard a loud thud of a door being knocked down. Now Magneto entered the hallway and saw Logan with Rogue. "Oh! Hiding behind your little friend won't work anymore! Didn't I tell you? We were fired this morning!"
Oh no, Logan thought. That meant that now Rogue was in as much danger as he was. He quickly pulled Rogue across him and pushed her into the other room.
"New rules!" laughed Magneto as the fired a plasma shot. Fortunately for Logan but unfortunately for Magneto, he caught it.
"Oh, mister smart-as-supercomputer-and-can-lift-3,000-times-his-own-weight thinks he's so tough! Well let's just see how long you can hold that!"
Soon the plasma became too hot to hold, so Logan began bouncing it from hand to hand. Suddenly he grabbed it and threw it at Magneto. It knocked him back while bouncing off him and hitting a record player. The needle bounced onto the record and the record turned on. It started playing Elvis's song "You Ain't No Friend Of Mine."
Logan followed Rogue into the other room. "What are we gonna do?" she asked.
When Magneto recovered, he heard the song playing. "Ooh, I love this song!"
Back in the other room, Logan was putting together some mechanical thingy majig inside Scrump. Logan said a word in his alien language. "Pliers," Rogue answered and handed them to Logan. He said another word. "Screwdriver," she said and handed him the tool. He finished using it and held up the doll. "Check."
Magneto began going through closets and opening rooms to find where Logan was. "Come out my little friend from whatever you're hiding behind." Suddenly he saw Scrump rolling out on a roller skate towards him. "What the . . .?"
BOOOOOOM!!
The exploding force knocked Magneto to the ground again. He looked up and saw Logan climbing along the ceiling, laughing at him. Magneto groaned as he got up. "Come on, what's the big deal?"
Logan answered him in alien.
"I'll put you back together again!" He grabbed a cupboard off the walls and started throwing the plates inside it at Logan. "I can make you taller, and not quite so hairy!"
"I like hairy!" Logan dodged all the plates, which instead sliced through the roof.
Mystique was waiting outside when she saw the plates coming out of the roof. Had Magneto gone nuts?! "No . . . no . . . no . . . NO!"
By now there was a circle of slices around Logan.
"Ha! You throw like your mother!"
"Hey! Leave my mother out of this!"
Suddenly the ceiling collapsed, with Logan still hanging on to it. He groaned when he hit the floor with the roof on top of him.
Magneto began making his way to where Logan landed. "You could always do with a makeover. I tried to give you my good looks. But, let's face it, something went wrong."
"No!" shouted Rogue as she started hitting him with a broom.
"Wha-"
Suddenly Logan leapt out of the rubble and tackled Magneto easily. Despite the heavy armor, he was able to roll over him, lift him into the air, and throw him out the window. After that he and Rogue dashed to the back door. "We can make it if we go-"
She opened the door, and there was Mystique. "You're alive!"
Rogue slammed the door. "They're all over the place!"
Suddenly Magneto appeared again. "Trying to get away, hey? Here!" He pulled out some sort of gadget that was a combination of scissors, toothbrushes, and toothpaste. "Let me stop you!" He threw the gadget at the pair. They both dodged away and Mystique opened the door. She saw the object flying at her and closed the door just in time. The device hit the door and got halfway through. The toothpaste cap burst off and the toothpaste nearly got Mystique.
"You always get in the way!" groaned Magneto as Mystique dashed inside.
"Where's the girl?" Mystique asked as she grabbed his collar. "What have you done with the girl?"
"Hello? Charles Xavier?" they heard Rogue say on the phone. "Mutants are attackin' mah house."
"No, no, no! No mutants!" cried Mystique as she ran over to stop her.
Suddenly another wall went down as Logan lifted up a blue Bug. "Blue punch bugy!" He swung the car and hit Magneto, banging him against a wall. "No punch back!" He finished by smashing Magneto with the car. When he did, the car honked.
"They want mah brother!" Rogue told Xavier over the phone.
"Give me that phone you little brat!" snapped Mystique as she swiped it from her. Then she set very calmly, "Everything's under control."
Xavier was surprised when he heard the strange voice. "Rogue, who was that?"
"Oh good. Mah brother found the chainsaw!"
"Rogue! Don't hang-"
Too late.
Logan jumped up with the chainsaw in his hands as he laughed madly. Then he leapt at Magneto and was about to saw him up good. Magneto managed to get a plunger and threw it at Logan. Logan dropped the chainsaw and hit the ground with the plunger on his head. He then found Magneto's plasma cannon! He quickly grabbed it and was about to fire when Magneto stuffed a carrot in the opening. Logan looked at the gun with a look of worry on his face.
Magneto folded his arms. "You shouldn't play with guns."
"Oh, okay," said Logan as he quickly handed him the gun.
"Thank you." That was when Magneto began to hear the gun overloading. That wasn't good. He turned back to Logan. "Oh, wait! I just remembered it's your birthday. Happy birthday!" He tossed the gun back to Logan and began to walk away.
Logan tapped him on the shoulder and gave the gun back. "Merry Christmas!"
"It's not Christmas!"
"Happy Hanukah!"
This pattern kept going as Mystique grabbed Rogue and ran out of the house with her. "We're leaving Logan?!" cried Rogue.
"Trust me, this isn't going to end well!"
As they ran, Logan and Magneto kept playing their game of 'hot gun.'
"One potato!" said Magneto.
"Two potato!" said Logan.
"Three potato!"
"Four!"
"Five potato!"
"Six potato!"
"Seven potato more!"
"MY . . ."
"MOTHER . . ."
"SAYS . . ."
"THAT . . ."
"YOU . . ."
"ARE . . ."
"it."
"HA! I win!" shouted Magneto, then he looked down and saw the gun in his hands.
BOOOOOOOOOMM!!!
Debris flew everywhere. Mystique and Rogue were out of the house by now, but not far enough to escape its remains. Mystique got hit on the head with a piece of wood, making her drop Rogue and tumble head first into the bushes. Rogue looked up from where she landed and dropped her mouth in shock.
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Oh boy! Jean is so busted! What will she think when she sees this? More over, what will Charles Xavier think! Find out next chapter, unless you've seen the movie and know what's going to happen. Oh well, please read it anyway! R&R! I'm almost done! Just a few more chapters! See ya next time!