A Raven Colored Past
Chapter Three: Dark Tears
June 9th, 2004
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Raven sunk deeply into her feather bed, looking up at the intricately carved stone above her head. It had been years since she had lain in this bed, not since she was a young child dreaming of leaving this place. She breathed in deep, smelling the strong scent of lavender, mingled with honey suckle (the scent of her mother), and tinged with the scent of freshly burned wood.
Sephiroth.
Just the thought of him made her skin crawl. She despised every ounce of his being, and even more so after this ordeal with the death of her father. When Raven was younger, Sephiroth had been a good friend of hers… but time changes people, and Sephiroth was slowly exposed to the scum of the males that inhabited the Underworld. He turned out to be a very influential child.
Raven grabbed a pillow and sighed deeply, reminiscing of the days when him and her would race around the dark and dingy hallways only to be scolded later by Raven's mother. It was hard to give those days up, days when she was a careless child, when she knew nothing of the intricacies of royalty of Azarath. Now she was bound by law to marry Sephiroth… the law she despised most of all, for it had destroyed her mother.
Arella looked up at the massive male in front of her, feeling her body cringe with hatred for him. "My daughter is not property!" She screamed, dark eyes flashing like an evening storm. "She is not to be sold or bartered for like a beast of burden!"
"Your daughter is not yours," The man replied calmly, never looking up from the papers in front of him. "She became mine when you gave birth to her."
"She was never yours… you stole from me… you stole my life, my love, my chastity…" Arella's voice held nothing but complete and utter loathing for the man that sat before her now. "And I'll be damned if you take my daughter away from me."
The red-faced man looked up, a smile of malice gracing his lips. "That can be arranged." In an instant Raven's mother lay on the ground, her white dress stained with the liquid of life… blood.
As darkness took her, Arella found strength to take one last look into the eyes of the young child hiding under the table…
Raven had witnessed her own mother's death… and now begged for her father's.
Tears stained the pillow that Raven now hugged deeply. She wished never to relive that moment again, the moment that Raven decided she would never stay in Azarath and never be a part of it.
Her mother was a human. Her father was a demon.
And Raven was a bastard child.
Not that it had ever bothered her, she was still Trigon's favorite, be she bastard or not. But Arella was right, Trigon had stolen from her… he had raped her.
A knock from the door forced Raven's eyes open, and pushed back her tears. Taking a deep breath, she composed herself and started for the door. Beast Boy stood there, looking terribly uncomfortable as his eyes shifted around and he fidgeted greatly.
"You look very out of place," Raven remarked flatly, letting him enter her room.
"I feel very out of place." He glanced around the room, then turned back to Raven. "Mm… I see we have the same decorator."
Raven rolled her eyes and sighed at his vain attempt at humor. He was the one who volunteered to accompany her to Azarath. Gods forbid that this place actually be frightening. She looked at him strangely, suddenly trying to figure out exactly why he had chosen to come… it wasn't as if he actually cared that much about her to put his eternal soul in danger…right?
"So…" Beast Boy began, giving Raven a slight jolt from her silence. She turned to look at her companion with her placid gaze. "Is this your room?"
"I'm standing in it aren't I?" Raven questioned sarcastically.
"I meant if it was your room when you lived here," Beast Boy corrected himself, unfazed by Raven's sudden burst of nastiness.
The dark woman paused for a moment, looking at all the child's trinkets that lined the walls, and reaching out to pick up a small doll on a shelf. She looked at it in her hand, then up at the shape-shifter and nodded slowly. "Yes."
There was a moment of awkward silence. "Raven… I'm sorry about your father."
"Why?" She asked, looking up at him, surprised. "I'm not."
"But… he was your father." Beast Boy looked quite surprised at Raven's choice of words. There was a tinge of complete and utter despise for the deceased demon in her voice's flat tones.
"Beast Boy…" Raven said in an exhausted tone. "My father was no father, he was a demon. He was nothing more than half of the process of procreation."
"Ouch." Beast Boy remarked. "I hope you don't feel that way about all males."
Her features softened and Raven shook her head. "No. There are guys I like, and who treat me with respect… Sephiroth not being one of them."
"Robin, Cyborg, and I care about you, Raven… and we try to respect you as best as we can." Her companion supplied, feeling a little helpless that the Titan boys didn't do as much for her as they should have.
"You do a good enough job, Beast Boy."
He smiled a little, then looked around the room again. Everything in it looked ancient, as if the heathen gods of old had built this place. Raven crawled on her bed into a fetal position and basked in the silence… before he broke it.
"So…"
Raven raised an eyebrow and sighed deeply, uncurling herself from a ball. "Beast Boy, do you understand the concept of silence?"
Beast Boy sighed deeply, rolling his eyes toward the ceiling and feeling another argument approach them. "Do you want me to leave, Raven?"
"You should go home, Beast Boy. You don't belong here." Raven stood on her feet and waved vaguely at the door.
That pierced his heart. True he didn't belong here, but he was doing it for her safety. He was doing all of this for her. "I'm here for you, Raven!" He cried angrily at her. "I want to keep you safe!"
This burst Raven's last nerve, and she glared at him angrily. "Who are you to keep me safe!? I can take care of myself! I don't need your help or anyone else's!"
"Damn it, Raven!" Beast Boy cried, approaching her. "You've never even let anyone help you! Every time we extend a hand to you, you flinch and turn away. It's like your frightened of us and our help!"
Raven's eyes narrowed at him. "I'm not frightened of anything!"
"I think…" Beast Boy's voice was soft and caring now, as if he finally understood why Raven always turned away. "I think you are afraid. Raven, everyone cares for you… everyone loves you… but you just don't see that." He now stood just a few measly feet from her, and looked deeply into her dark eyes, searching for the light that was trapped within them. "You can't do everything on your own."
Raven tried to step back away from him, but discovered that she was trapped against the wall, and forced to look into Beast Boy's searching eyes. She felt her chest tighten, and realized once again why she both loved and feared those eyes of his. They were comforting and beautiful, but at the same time, they forced Raven to see things about her self that she wished not to.
What Beast Boy did next shocked the girl into oblivion. He reached out and embraced her, tightly. Raven wanted to pull away, she wanted to smack him and hit him and yell cruel names at him… But instead she wrapped her arms around him tightly and sobbed into his shoulder. Beast Boy stroked her hair softly, hoping to calm her down. She'd done they exact opposite of what he expected her to do, but he wasn't complaining. To have Raven open to her emotions and feelings for him made Beast Boy feel like she cared for him.
Raven was glad that her powers weren't active in Azarath, otherwise the entire world would be in ruins by now. She instead just stood there and sobbed into Beast Boy shoulder, letting all her anger, frustrations, sadness, and fear come pouring out in drops of water. She cried until her body felt so exhausted, that breathing became a physically difficult task.
"See?" Beast Boy whispered softly into her ear, sending very strange and alien shivers through her body. "Don't you feel better?"
Raven pulled away to look at him, then she sniffed and nodded weakly. "I guess."
The green male handed her a handkerchief, then smoothed her hair again. "Everything's gonna be okay, Raven."
"I feel like a fool, crying like that…" Raven whispered, dabbing at her eyes.
Beast Boy embraced her again, then pulled away and looked deeply into her eyes again. "Crying isn't a weakness, it's a strength. Being able to show your emotions without consequence or shame is a gift, Raven."
The dark girl stared at him in shock. Those intelligent words did not just come from his mouth… did they? "Wow… that's very Zen of you, Beast Boy."
He shrugged nonchalantly. "Tell that to the fortune cookie."
Raven's face fell instantly.
Then she began to laugh.
Hard.
She just stood there, head thrown back as every muscle in her body convulsed and musical tones poured from her mouth in a beautiful, primal rhythm. She just stood there and laughed for a long while. Finally she felt her self calm down and Raven smiled at her green companion. "Wow… that's one deep fortune cookie."
Beast Boy smiled lopsidedly at her and shrugged. "I guess…" There was a moment of silence. "I've never seen you laugh, Raven."
Raven blushed instantly, turning away slightly. "Yeah… well… few have. My powers don't really work in Azarath, so I am freer to express my emotions. Though I rarely choose to." She added the last few words quickly, in hopes of discouraging any more attempts at making her emotions shine through.
"You look so much happier when you laugh, Raven," He stated calmly, smiling.
Raven raised a skeptical eyebrow. "Most people do, Beast Boy. Laughter is generally an expression of happiness."
"No… you look happy, Raven. Content with yourself…" He paused for a moment, then shrugged and turned away. "But what do I know?"
There was silence again, and Raven looked at him for a few moments, as if trying to read what he really thought about her and her laughter. Then, she turned away and back to her feather bed. "I think I'll rest for a while."
Her companion nodded in response. "I think I'll get some rest too." He started for the door, before pausing and turning back to the dark girl. "Sleep well, Raven. Um… could you wake me when you get up?"
"Sure."
With that the shape-shifter nodded, then tuned and left Raven's room; leaving her to decipher all thing mystical things that Beast Boy had said to her today. And why was she so intrigued by them? Crawling into her bed, she felt sleep over some her, no matter what her mind wanted.
Little did she know, that some one had been intently watching her… and Beast Boy…
- - -
Sephiroth glared into the garnet orb in front of him, wanting to smash it against the wall. Even in his childhood, Sephiroth had never made Raven laugh. They laughed together, but never at something. This Beast Boy had made her cry, laugh, and confess her all of her emotions in just a few short minutes of conversation.
'I loath you…' The dark man thought, feeling every muscle in his body tighten with contempt. 'You are the bane of my existence… and I will be rid of you.'
- - -
YAY! It's out, so BOO YAH! I got it out during exam week so ya'll better feel special or I'm gonna have to hunt you down and kick some serious arse! Okay… well… that's about all I have to say…
I don't own the Teen Titans (dur, my name is so not on the credits!)
Review if you liked it, review if you hated it… it's all good!
Oh wait! I do have a note! I have never seen/played/watched/laid eyes on any Final Fantasy (other than FF Unlimited), so no, Sephiroth isn't based off one of the characters. I used the name because it's Quabbala for 'God brought into man'; 'Infinite brought into finite'; etc. And I thought that if a god was brought into a man's body… the man would definitely act like Sephiroth.
So… that's the story behind Sephiroth. Fun fact: He was almost named Tegh, which is Norse for Swordsman… well that's my story and thank you for listening!
Love: Xaph!