Part Nine: Breaking Point
Getting to the party had been such a ridiculous production that it was rather anti-climactic to realize that no one so much as looked up at their entrance.
Well, almost no one.
Ginny had been the last to be pulled through the door and she had released Luna's hand upon crossing the threshold so as to close it behind her. Leaning heavily against the wood, her eyes skimmed her surroundings, drinking in the scene around her. The room was filled with what appeared to be well over two hundred students, mostly Gryffindors and Ravenclaws, but with a substantial number of Hufflepuffs and, Ginny was surprised to note, a handful of Slytherins. The Slytherins seemed to be composed primarily of younger students and they were standing together near one of the fireplaces in what she considered a decidedly anti-social sort of way.
A gentle waltz was already playing but no one had taken to the dance floor just yet. She spotted Seamus and Lavender sitting by the fire with Katie and Dean. Luna had run over to greet some Ravenclaws Ginny recognized, dragging Neville along with her. Cho Chang was a part of that group, although Michael Corner wasn't with her. It took Ginny a moment before she spotted him leaning against the wall on the other side of the room, saying something to Ernie MacMillan.
Her brother's red hair caught her eye then and she realized why he and Hermione had made a beeline directly to the food table upon entering the dance. Harry was standing there with Hannah Abbot in her deep scarlet colored robes. Ginny fully expected him to ignore her completely, but was incredibly surprised when their eyes met across the sea of people and a look of pure anguish crossed his face. Every nasty plan she had envisioned for him on the way over from the Common Room flew out of her mind as she was suddenly overcome with the need to make amends. The thought had no sooner registered in her mind when Harry suddenly pushed past Ron and headed in her direction, closing the gap between them with long, purposeful strides.
Tonks abruptly filled Ginny's line of vision, blocking her view of Harry altogether. "I thought I was going to have an aneurysm, what with you and Hermione sauntering in nearly an hour late." Clad in pale green robes that reminded Ginny of Blaise Zabini's eyes, she was in her natural state, her dark brown hair pulled up in sleek ponytail. "What took you so long?"
Startled, Ginny took a moment to respond. "Oh, I'm sorry about that. There was a bit of a crisis and it's my fault, really." She tried to angle herself in such a way that she could see around the Auror. "Everything looks lovely, though. You and Hermione outdid yourselves."
Her comment clearly did little to appease Tonks's irritation, but that quickly became a moot point when the lights suddenly flashed a dark red. Tonks jumped, startled, and Ginny saw a flash of black hair behind her.
From that point on, the party was thrown into a sort of organized chaos. Students began darting every which way, some diving behind the furniture, others sneaking under the food table. Neville and Luna collided with a few of the young Slytherins in their mad dash, but they all managed to pick themselves up and run for cover behind some window curtains. Before she could think of where to run, she suddenly felt someone grab her arm and was surprised to see that Hermione was yanking her behind the enchanted fir closest to the door. Ginny saw her brother run past and drag Harry to a dark corner unlit by the fireplaces.
"Oh, blast! Tonks looked around wildly as the last of the students scampered out of sight and she frantically started smoothing down her robes. "Shush, everyone, shush!" The stifled laughter echoing around the room quickly stopped. "Finite Incantatem," she muttered, causing the red light to fade just as the doorknob turned.
"Tonks?" The sound of Professor Lupin's tentative call made Ginny surge forward in anticipation.
He nudged the door open a bit more and it was about then that she heard Hermione gasp softly next to her. Unlike the other occupants of the room, they could see him fairly well from their vantage point and the light from the hall flooded in behind him, illuminating his profile. In addition to being dressed in better robes than Harry and Ron, his longish hair had been carefully brushed back from his face and he was smiling into the darkness in a way that made him almost shockingly handsome. Ginny had never seen him look so genuinely happy but she knew that Hermione hadn't gasped because of what he was wearing or how he looked. Instead, it had to do with what he was carrying. Peering between the branches of the fir, she could see that he held a massive bouquet of dark red roses behind his back.
She stole a glance at Tonks and it was clear that the Auror had spotted them too because instead of responding, she just stood there, illuminated by the soft glow of the fire, staring at where the red was showing from behind him.
"Tonks?" He stepped inside fully, his eyes adjusting to the dimmer light inside and, for the first time, he registered how different the room looked. "Tonks? What's all this?"
Her eyes flickered up to his and she just let out a small, awed laugh as though she still wasn't quite comprehending him but it was swallowed up by the collective shout of the students leaping out from their hiding places to announce their presence.
Lupin started, stepping away so quickly he was almost back out in the hall, but a shaky smile soon broke out over his face as he began to recognize the students rushing towards him. With a slight flick of his wrist, the flowers disappeared and he stepped back inside to greet them properly.
"Did you see.?" Hermione whispered unnecessarily.
"Yes." Ginny responded. Her friend gripped her arm for a moment as they exchanged looks of pure delight.
Ginny loved being in on the secret that, beneath her bookish exterior, Hermione Granger had the heart of a true romantic. Ever since Ron's shamelessly jealous tantrums over Viktor Krum had made Ginny aware of how highly he regarded her, she had taken the opportunity to observe the object of her brother's affections closely. The experience had been a particularly enlightening one and ever since then, Ginny had found herself approving of this odd, brainy, sometimes bossy, but always brilliant girl.
Luna moved to stand beside them. "Is there a reason why we're still hiding?" she asked quietly.
Both girls turned to look at her, embarrassed to realize that they were so riveted by what they'd seen that they had neglected to jump out with the rest of their friends.
"Uhm.no." Hermione smiled awkwardly. "I'm going to go and greet Professor Lupin. Ginny?"
She glanced over at the throng of students around him. "No, I think I'll do that in a bit. You can go on without me."
"Okay, then. I'll find you later."
"You know, Ginny, you really do look stunning," Luna said, once Hermione had gone. She turned to her date, who had been staring absent-mindedly at the food table. "Doesn't she, Neville?"
"Hm?" He looked at her vaguely.
"Just like a Siren," Luna continued.
"What?" Neville asked.
"Oh, now, really-" Ginny shook her head with an embarrassed laugh.
"No, you really do," Luna persisted. "With that red hair of yours and the white gown.it's just what I'd expect a Siren to look like." She turned to Neville again. "Neville, if you were a sailor and you heard Ginny singing, wouldn't you crash your ship on the rocks because she's so beautiful?"
His mouth opened and closed a few times before he settled on a slightly suspicious look as though he thought he'd been asked a trick question on purpose. "Ginny looks very nice," he said finally. "I'm going to get some food."
"I'll come with you," Luna said, taking his hand. "Hi, Harry."
She threw out the greeting with such causal flair that Ginny took a moment to realize what she'd said. Turning, she saw him standing off to the side, not five feet away, staring at her with an expression she'd never seen on his face before and, as such, couldn't interpret. She prayed silently that he hadn't heard the nonsensical conversation that had just taken place, as she wasn't particularly in the mood to be humiliated in front of him for the second time that evening.
He looked to be about to say something when Ron suddenly barreled by, grabbed him by the arm, and started hauling him away from her. "Harry, mate, I've been looking for you. Hermione needs help with something."
She knew the sound of Ron trying to avert disaster when she heard it and could clearly pick up the panicked undertones of his voice he was trying to pass off as urgency. She reckoned her brother was attempting to prevent another scene like the one that had taken place in the boys' dormitory.
Watching Harry get unceremoniously carted off, she couldn't quite fault Ron for his actions. Though she didn't have any intention of arguing with him in public, she had also come to the conclusion that their interactions were becoming increasingly volatile. She was calm now, but if he said something to provoke her, she couldn't altogether guarantee that she'd stay that way.
The crowd around Professor Lupin had thinned considerably once the music started playing as many students had rushed to the dance floor. Seeing an opportunity to greet him properly, Ginny made her way over just as he was dispatching the last of his well-wishers. Before she could get his attention, however, he started walking to where Tonks was standing a few feet away. She was regarding him with an awkward smile on her face, her fingertips resting lightly against her neck as she fiddled with a small round locket hanging from a silver chain.
They stood and stared at each other for what Ginny felt was an eternity before Lupin suddenly broke the prolonged silence by taking hold of her wrist. "I like your hair," he said, as he pulled her against him and embraced her tightly.
"Thank you," she responded softly, burrowing her face in his robes. Ginny was just starting to wonder if she should come back later when Tonks suddenly pulled out of his arms. She blinked up at him, her long lashes dancing in an exaggerated flutter. "You brought me flowers," she said cheekily, all evidence of awkwardness gone from her demeanor.
"Did I, now?" Lupin seemed amused.
"Yes you did and don't be coy with me, Remus Lupin. I saw them myself."
"Interesting." There was a hint of humor in his voice as he drew out the word and it made Ginny bite back a smile.
"Red roses, that's what they were." Tonks shook her head impatiently. "It's a bloody walking cliché, Remus. You ought to be ashamed of yourself."
He smirked. "Should I, now?"
"Where are they?" she asked abruptly.
"What?"
"My flowers. I want them. Where are they?"
"I thought you said they were clichéd."
"I know exactly what I said but that doesn't change the fact that they're mine and I want them."
He chuckled.
"Stop giving me that blasted look, old man, and bring me back my flowers." Tonks's angry façade was slipping and she sounded as though she was trying to hold back laughter of her own.
"Well, as you already seem to know so much about these alleged flowers I bought you," Lupin said calmly, "then I reckon that you should be able to find them yourself."
"Don't toy with me, Remus. I want those bloody flowers and I'm not above hurting you to get them."
His voice lowered and took on a decidedly different tone. "Would you, now?"
Her lips parted slightly in shock and she didn't respond.
Suddenly, he cleared his throat and stepped back, his voice returning to normal. "Well, as much as I'd like to take you up on your offer, Tonks, I'm afraid Miss Weasley would like a word with one of us."
Caught, Ginny froze in horror, her cheeks aflame. Tonks quickly turned to her, looking surprised but not embarrassed in the least.
"Hi Gin!" she said cheerfully, as Lupin slipped an arm around her waist in a friendly manner. "Everything all right?" Her eyes widened slightly then, her delicate features taking on a look of trepidation. "Merlin, it's not the food is it? Dobby hasn't poisoned everyone already, has he? I just knew that fruit platter looked strange."
"Er.no," Ginny responded, trying to control her blush. "I-I just wanted to say Merry Christmas to Professor Lupin."
"Ginny helped with all the planning, you know." Tonks tilted her chin up towards him and he smiled down at her in response. "She and Hermione were my partners in crime."
"Well, thank you, Ginny," Lupin responded, giving Tonks an affable squeeze. "You've both done such a wonderful job here."
"Actually, sir, Tonks is being modest-"
"Well, that's a first," he cut in and was rewarded with a gentle swat from the lady in question.
Strangely entertained by their behavior, Ginny almost lost her train of thought. "No, really, she did most of the work."
"Yes," the Auror said in a tragic voice, "I worked myself to the bone, I did. Going through magazines and looking at pictures, making Ginny handle all the food, having Hermione work on the room plan, bossing around house elves, oh the work I did.and what do I get? Nothing. Not one whit. Not a kind word, nor a single gesture of thanks."
"Wouldn't place bets on that just yet," Lupin muttered.
"Really? What are we betting on?" Tonks cocked her head and sent him an innocent smile. "The word or the gesture?"
"Right then!" Ginny said brightly, cutting off Lupin's response. She wasn't quite sure what she was bearing witness to but she was beginning to feel more and more like an intruder in the conversation. "I think I'll go check on that fruit platter you mentioned."
"Good thinking, Gin," Tonks said. "I'll catch up with you later."
"Thanks again, Ginny," Lupin added.
Vaguely relieved, she sped off in search of something to do. For the first half hour of the party, she found herself wandering the floor, greeting people, speaking with the elves and generally trying to keep herself occupied while the couples enjoyed the first few dances together. Hannah Abbott appeared to be keeping Harry properly distracted and, to a certain extent, Ginny was grateful. She wasn't quite sure what she would have said to him if he'd managed to speak with her before Ron intervened. Although she was indeed less angry than she had been, part of her knew the reason she was so quick to forgive his trespasses was because of how she felt about him. Given recent events that indicated the futility of such feelings, she thought it best to keep her distance while she sorted things out.
With that in mind, she continued wandering about the room, carrying on mindless conversations with partygoers and making sure everyone was being properly served. In the end, Seamus Finnegan was the one to save her from an evening of relentless boredom.
"Care to dance, Gin?" he said with a smile, pointing at his date Lavender, who was deep in conversation with Pavarti. "I doubt she'll even notice I've gone. I imagine they wish they'd come here with one another. Been ignoring me for the last twenty minutes, at least."
Smiling, she accepted and had a very pleasant conversation with him before Colin cut in towards the end of the song. From there, she took turns dancing with Neville, Amir, and Dennis but begged a break when Dean came to ask her because she was exhausted and needed the rest.
Wandering over to the food table to make sure that everything was in order, she was tapped on the shoulder by Professor McGonagall and quickly pulled in to a discussion about the Familiar's class. The conversation became even more engrossing when Professor Dumbledore joined them and they spent the next twenty minutes discussing her phoenix.
By the time Ginny broke free from her professors and located Dean again, he was standing near the fire with Katie and a large group of Gryffindors. Noticing her approach from afar, he quickly stood to meet her before they went off to the dance floor together.
Out of all the boys she'd danced with, Ginny found Dean most exhilarating, as he was just as enthusiastic as Neville when it came to effort but unlike poor Neville, he was also extremely skilled. She knew she was outclassed within the first two minutes of their dance and after that, it was all she could do to hold on and hope that she didn't fall. This was especially important in light of the fact that he took enormous pleasure out of spinning her around in wild circles to the point where they were both in hysterics.
By the end of the song, she found herself clinging to the front of his robes with her eyes closed, waiting until the dizziness subsided. Opening them for a brief second, she thought she glimpsed Harry looking in her direction from the edge of the dance floor but a wave of vertigo caused her to slide them shut before she could be certain. By the time the world righted itself enough for her to verify what she'd seen, he was gone. Quickly searching the crowd, she found him again, and was caught yet again by the desire to just go up and talk to him. The impulse instantly vanished when she saw him approached by, of all people, Cho Chang.
Unable to bear watching that particular exchange, Ginny bid Dean a swift farewell and resolved to move as far away from that part of the room as humanly possible.
In her search for somewhere else to be, she spotted Ron. A mildly anxious feeling invaded the pit of her stomach when she saw that he was standing by himself in a corner looking extremely agitated. Hermione was notably missing.
His failure to look up when she approached caused the dark feeling to deepen.
"Ron," she said carefully, "where is-"
"All I said was that it looked nice when it is the way it always is. Since when is that a bad thing?"
She blinked at him. "Pardon?"
"Her ruddy hair."
Ginny felt her stomach start sinking. "Oh no. Oh Ron, you didn't."
"It's Pavarti's fault, you know. She's the one who brought it up. She just kept going on and on about how amazing Hermione's hair looked and it just sort of got insulting, you know? Like her hair doesn't normally look nice or something. So then, all I said was that I sort of liked it better when it was done the other way and they just both gave me this LOOK." His face formed a bitter expression. "I mean, what's wrong with what I said? All I meant is that she doesn't need to do her hair up like that to look nice. She always looks nice." His ears turned pink and he sent his sister a slightly embarrassed glance before the accusatory look returned. "You girls. Always saying you want us to tell you the truth and constantly asking us for our opinion and then you get all huffy when give it. Bloody nutters, all of you."
It was a sad moment when Ginny realized that, on some perverse level, Ron was making sense. Luckily, she would never admit this aloud. These particular circumstances meant her loyalty to Hermione as a fellow girl trumped her loyalty to her brother. So, instead, she crossed her arms and glared at him.
"We're nutters? Hardly. The only reason we'd ever act nuts is because you boys drive us mad with your stupidity." And with that, she turned on her heel and went off in search of Hermione.
She quickly located the other girl sitting rigidly against the opposite wall, hiding rather effectively in one of the oversized armchairs. Bracing herself, Ginny approached. "I just spoke with Ron-"
"I am in no mood to exert the incredible amount of effort necessary to understand boys right now." Hermione stared darkly ahead.
"Neither am I." Ginny simply shrugged and took a seat. "Perhaps we can start a club."
"Hello, friends." Luna walked up to them, smiling radiantly in her deep blue robes. She was pulling Neville along behind her and he looked flustered, but happy.
There was an uncomfortable silence.
"Ah." Luna turned to her date. "They are cross. Perhaps you should leave for a bit."
Neville looked confused.
"Get me a cup of punch, please." She gave him an encouraging shove and this he seemed to understand.
"Oh, right. Right."
Once he had wandered out of earshot, Luna sat down beside Ginny and looked at her friends. "What's happened now?"
"Ron insulted her hair."
"Boys are so daft," Hermione burst out with such passion that Luna gave her a startled look. "No matter how direct you are with them, they never seem to understand what you're trying to say."
"Well, I'm always direct with Neville and he seems to understand what I'm trying to say."
"Yes, well, Neville is not nearly as thick as Ron," Ginny responded quickly, seeing the vexed look in Hermione's eyes.
"What about Harry?" Luna asked.
Ginny looked over at him and felt a flash of irritation to realize that he was still thoroughly entangled in his conversation with Cho. She then noted that Hannah Abbot was dancing with Ernie MacMillan. Typical. "Nobody is as thick as Harry," she said flatly.
Hermione looked thoughtful. "That's quite right, actually."
"Well, I suppose that's something in Ron's favor, isn't it?"
Despite themselves, they smiled at Luna's comment. A sudden crash diverted their attention to where Neville was standing several feet away, holding one cup of punch in his right hand and wearing what appeared to be the remains of another.
"Oh dear." Luna rushed to go help him.
Ginny's eyes followed the source of the accident, which appeared to be a rapidly departing Michael Corner. He was shoving roughly through the crowd of students on the dance floor. Moments later, he disappeared from the room altogether. Her attention flickered over to where Harry and Cho stood, huddled in their quiet conversation. They didn't seem to have noticed his exit. Ginny considered following her ex-boyfriend to see what was going on, but quickly decided against it. There was a reason she didn't get involved with other people's romances and this one was a bit too volatile and close to home for her tastes.
As if in response to her thoughts, Cho suddenly reached forward and hugged Harry, burying her face in his chest. Ginny tried to ignore the quiet twist in her heart but it was too late and she felt the remainder of her energy drain right out of her. Staying away from Harry when he was so close was proving to be just too emotionally burdensome for her to bear.
Hermione must have noticed the expression on her face, because she reached over and touched her arm. "Gin? Are you all right?'
The thought of lying and staying for the sake of her friends briefly flitted across her mind, but Ginny knew she'd be terrible company for the rest of the evening. "This was such a mistake. I knew I shouldn't have come at all." Turning to the other girls, she took a deep breath. "I think I'm going back to the dormitory."
"Oh, but it's not yet half past nine." Hermione looked concerned. "You can't leave so soon."
Ginny shook her head. "I've still got some packing left to do before tomorrow morning. If I leave now, I can get that done and get a decent night's sleep." Waving off the other girl's protests, she quietly hurried across the dance floor, stopping briefly to bid Tonks and Lupin farewell, before slipping out into the dark hallway. It was a relief when the door shut behind her, muffling the happy murmur of the other revelers.
Her mind awash in confused thoughts, Ginny was almost at the stairs that led to Gryffindor Tower when she glanced at the large doors leading to the grounds outside and suddenly had the urge for a quick turn about the lake. She reckoned that some fresh air would do her good. It also might stave off the light depression she felt weighing down upon her.
Glancing around furtively for Filch or Mrs. Norris, she swiftly made her escape.
The night air felt like a balm on her flushed cheeks and she breathed in deeply, filling her lungs with the intoxicating cold. The thinness of her dress robes meant she was quickly numb but it was a pleasant sort of feeling. So much less complicated than the way she normally felt.
It was strange, given how many truly horrible things had happened to her in the dark, that she still felt so at ease in it. She reckoned that Hagrid's cheery, well-lit cabin leant a certain degree of comfort, but that wasn't the only reason.
Coming down a gentle slope, she noted that the lake looked particularly lovely in its half-frozen beauty. Moonlight skimmed the thin ice that partially covered the surface, bathing its roughed edges in a pale silver glow. She soaked in the vision, greedily committing it to memory. Perhaps that's why she enjoyed the night so much. Moments like these, she didn't have to share with anyone. It was as though, for the briefest snap of time, the lake, the grounds, the forest and all the splendor of the evening were hers and hers alone. As the youngest in a family of nine, it was no wonder she derived so much joy from these solitary strolls.
The sky glittered overwhelmingly with stars and it seemed the more Ginny gazed up at them, the more appeared before her. It was a pleasantly dizzying experience, walking along with her head tilted towards the heavens. Her slippers made a wonderful crunch against the frostbitten ground as each step took her farther from the castle.
And then, despite all efforts to the contrary, she felt it. That terrible straining sensation, as though something in her chest was trying to break free. Struggling for a moment, she finally gave up and let out a ragged sob as that muted sort of longing that had been a constant companion of hers for so long finally burst forth. For an instant, she hated herself. Hated the fact that, even surrounded by such astounding beauty, she couldn't distract herself from thinking of him.
Clenching her fists where they lay huddled under her robe, she managed to force down the tears that threatened dangerously to surface. Unfortunately, that terrible, keening hunger for him was as strong as ever. It was just downright senseless. She had tried, oh, how she had tried not to think of him this way. She had tried so hard to be his friend. Even when he was being downright cruel to her, she had found her heart only too ready to forgive him.
She wondered, idly, if she were broken somehow. If, somewhere between Tom Riddle and that night in the Ministry, she had been damaged irreparably in a way that no one could ever see or understand. That was the only plausible explanation she could come up with for her ridiculous emotional turmoil. Despite their terrible fight, she knew she couldn't even really get mad at Harry. Friends complimented each other all the time. From that perspective, he had never once done anything to make her believe she meant more to him than their friendship warranted.
And yet the frustration refused to abate because here she was, standing outside in the freezing cold, pining away for him like she did when she was ten years old. And where was he? Dancing obliviously in the warmth of the DA room with Cho Chang, most likely.
One of the secrets Ginny guarded most closely to her heart was the period of time, shortly after she had seen him board the Hogwarts Express his first year, that she prayed for him. To this day, she couldn't explain what had compelled her to do it, but she could still vividly recall having sat on her bed each night to fervently ask whatever powers that existed to keep him safe from harm. Each time she thought about it in subsequent years, she'd told herself that it was because she felt sorry for him and what Voldemort had done. Now, looking back, she wondered if that had been the beginning. If that had been some terrible foreshadowing for where she stood today.
Perhaps the most terrifying revelation was the knowledge that what she felt for him was starting to eat away at who she was. Simply put, she couldn't allow that. She wouldn't allow her feelings for him to subjugate her own identity. Ever since her time under the influence of Tom Riddle, Ginny had regarded her identity as precious. If the only solution to dealing with this inexplicable need she felt for him was to get away, to flee Hogwarts, or England, for that matter, then she'd seriously consider it.
The soft flap of wings above her head distracted her briefly and she glanced up, rather surprised to see a large owl gliding in circles twenty feet or so above her head. Confused, she squinted into the inky darkness and was rewarded for her efforts by being struck in the face by a small piece of parchment. Stooping, she picked it up from where it had fallen on the ground and unfolded it.
It was blank.
The whole thing was so odd, she started to feel a prickling fear start up her spine. Perhaps the dark wasn't the best place to be right then. Suddenly, Hagrid's hut looked much farther away than it had before and Ginny quickly started to walk back towards the castle. She was startled to a standstill, however, when the owl that had dropped the parchment alighted on a tree branch overhead and she got a good look at it.
Hedwig.
Her ears pricked up then and she heard the barely audible crunch of hurried footsteps on the icy ground. Turning towards the noise, she saw him, striding towards her from the distance. When she heard him call her name, she knew it was too late. He had already spotted her and she no longer had the option to slip away or blend in to the shadows and wait for him to pass. She felt the dark, wispy tendrils of anger curl around her stomach as she watched him approach. At one of the only times in her life when he was absolutely the last person she wanted to see, he had somehow managed to find her.
"Ginny--" he sounded out of breath "--I've been looking everywhere for you. Hermione said you'd gone back to the dormitory-"
"What are you doing here?"
There was a moment of silence since they'd asked the question simultaneously and neither seemed willing to respond first.
In that brief interlude, he composed himself enough to register the look on her face and it seemed to quickly spur him forward. "You're still angry with me, aren't you?"
The flash of surprise she felt at the rare appearance of his sensible side simply transformed into bitterness and fueled her increasing irritation. Knowing almost immediately that this conversation could not lead to anything useful, she concluded it would be best to keep it as brief as possible. "No, actually, I'm not. I'm only tired. I was just going in to bed, as a matter of fact. Good evening." She made to walk past him, only to be stopped again when he reached out and snagged hold of her arm.
"No, Ginny, please wait. I-I need to apologize for what I said."
Yes, because that was exactly what she needed: another empty apology from the famous Harry Potter that was only aimed at assuaging his own guilt.
"Look, I'm not angry with you. I understand you're sorry. You needn't apologize." She tried to shrug off his hand, but his grip was ironclad.
"Yes, I do." He sounded so inanely calm and patient she wanted to hit him. He reached up and took hold of her forearms, effectively trapping her. "You are still angry with me. I can hear it in your voice."
"Honestly, Potter, for your information the sun, the earth and the heavens do NOT revolve around you. And, while we're on the subject, neither do I." He looked shocked by her outburst and, for some reason, she derived a degree of pleasure from that. "Now let me go."
"You don't understand, you-you're not letting me explain-"
"Explain? Explain what? That you're only nice to me when it suits you? What makes you think you have to explain that?"
"What?" In contrast to her increasingly pronounced reaction to his presence, he just seemed to be retreating. "What do you mean?" His voice was just a few notches above a whisper.
"You know, you've really got some nerve, Potter." She was almost shouting at him now, and there was something wonderful about the horrified, hurt expression he was giving her. "Let me ask you something: where's Cho?"
He shook his head, clearly unnerved. "Cho? What does Cho have to do with this?"
Good. She was glad she had some impact on him. Lord knows she was sick and tired of being the only one impacted by their relationship. "Wonderful question. I have no idea what Cho has to do with anything. It's never made any sense, as far as I'm concerned. First you fancied her. Now Michael does. During the Yule Ball you ignored Pavarti Patil you were so busy mooning over her, this time you did the same to Hannah Abbot." She suppressed the urge to laugh in his face. "Now, if Cho has nothing to do with your behavior, then perhaps you'll enlighten me as to why Hannah Abbot is dancing with Ernie MacMillan?"
He had started trembling at some point during her speech and now just stared at her, as though frozen in place.
Undeterred, the floodgates all but rubble, she proceeded to mercilessly beat down on the one subject that had tormented her for so many years. "What's wrong? Is it that she isn't as good a dancer as you'd hoped?"
"No."
"Is it that she isn't as smart and interesting as you thought she was?"
"No."
"Is it that she isn't as mentally stable as she ought to be?" This particular accusation brought her the most sadistic pleasure.
"No."
"Then what, Harry? What completely absurd flaw have you found in poor Hannah that's sent you fleeing out here? What is it?"
"It's that she isn't you."
Ginny's mouth snapped shut.
Of all the things he could have chosen to say, that was perhaps the most wrong. It was also the only thing that completely halted her erratic downward spiral into insanity. And that's when she noticed it. That look in his eyes that made her all but stop breathing.
What she had misconstrued as resignation and withdrawal was, in fact, a slow emotional coiling. A feeling of horror crept into her when she awoke to the fact that the trembling she'd felt wasn't from sadness or cold but from fury. She could see it now and couldn't understand how she'd missed it. The hot, burning fury in his eyes had turned the green to black and it was mixed with something else. Something she couldn't even begin to bring herself to identify.
"You asked why I've been acting like a prat when you've been trying to be my friend." The quiet strain in his voice terrified her so badly she couldn't even bring herself to nod.
"Well," he continued in a harsh, hoarse voice, "it's because you're not my friend. We can't be friends."
This time, the anguish forced a response. "Why?!"
And that's when he kissed her. Hard.
Just when she thought she'd heard her heart breaking, he'd tightened his hold on her arms and jerked her forward with such force that she stumbled against him. The next thing she knew, his mouth was on her own and she was being struck with a dark, bruising kiss.
After the first electric shock from contact, all she could do was stand there, rooted to the spot, her hands braced against his chest. She could feel his heart beating wildly under her fingertips as he plunged forward, growing increasingly aggressive.
Her numbed senses slowly started to return and she made a weak attempt to slow him down, but to no avail. All she could do was try to keep up with him while he poured all his anger and frustration into her. It was bloody awkward, as she couldn't figure how to turn her head he was moving so fast, and her body was locked into place. In her limited experience with boys, she'd never been kissed like this before. Like she was being attacked. Somewhere in the back of her head, she realized that it was her fault.
She was the reason Harry Potter had lost control.
His lips molded against hers so brutally then that pleasure spiked into pain. Letting out a low moan she tried to pull away. She struggled against him and for the briefest moment managed to break free with a loud smack, gasping for air.
"Ow, Harry, it hurts-" The rest of the sentence died when she saw the hungry fascination in his eyes. He was still staring at her mouth. Something about that made her weak.
The moment hung with delicious anticipation and, with a soft growl, he reached for her again.
She met him part way this time.
His fingers tangled warmly in her hair, with a tenderness that she didn't think he was capable of, given his behavior moments before. She gasped against him in response and he slid his tongue softly against her parted lips as he gently tilted her head, deepening the kiss. His mouth began slanting possessively over hers again and again as he moaned softly, sending pleasant vibrations against her lips that echoed through her body.
An unbearable heat started to permeate her then, coupled with a painful ache in the pit of her stomach. The initial shock had fully worn off and she was awakening to a myriad of distracting details. The butter-soft feel of his dress robes under her hands, the spicy scent of some cologne he'd put on for the occasion, the incredible weight of his body pressed against her own, and finally, the evidence of his need for her.
A frantic thought tore through her mind then and she suddenly found herself acting on instinct. He was clearly unprepared for the desperate shove she gave him since he stumbled back a few steps, chest heaving, face frozen in shock as he stared at her.
"What.what.what are you.?" Tears pricked her eyes, as words failed her. This didn't make sense. None of this made sense. Her body was flooded with so many conflicting emotions that she felt ill. "Harry.I can't. It's just too much right now and I just-I can't."
"Ginny, wait, I-I shouldn't have-" He stepped forward, confusion and sadness battling on his handsome features but she quickly moved away from him.
"I'm sorry, Harry. I'm so sorry." And with that, she turned on her heel and sprinted towards the castle as fast as she could. She heard him calling her name, but her jumbled nerves only urged her to run faster. She was almost to the door when she realized with horror that, instead of letting her go as she had thought he would, he had taken off after her. She was lighter, but he was stronger and years of Quidditch meant that he was rapidly catching up.
Flinging open the front door, she almost barreled directly into Ron and Hermione who were standing at the foot of the stairs. She managed to dart out of the way at the last second, ignoring the surprised shout from Ron as she raced past them, heart in her throat.
Half way up the stairs she heard a second bang from the door, indicating that Harry had just made it inside as well. He called out to her again, but she leapt up the stairs faster. Turning to the next flight, she heard the distinct sounds of a scuffle and angry shouting erupt from below.
"Get off of me!"
"Just what the hell is going on?"
Recognizing her brother's voice, she felt a shock of gratitude that almost left her weak with relief.
"RON! Let go!"
"Bugger that! Did you just make my sister CRY?"
Surprised, she suddenly became aware of the wetness on her cheeks, but it was too much to contemplate at the moment and she simply concentrated on getting back to her dormitory. Taking up three more flights of stairs and six more corridors, she finally made it to Gryffindor Tower. Rounding a corner, she shouted "BogeyBots" down the hall and the Fat Lady swung open just in time for her to scramble through the hole.
"Slow down, dear. Goodness. Slow down!"
But Ginny couldn't slow down. Moving so quickly that the Gryffindor tapestries were just a red and gold blur, she bolted through the Common Room. It was blissfully deserted as most of the students were still at the party. She felt her lungs burn as she ran up the stairs to the fifth year dormitories but only allowed herself to catch her breath after she had slammed the door shut and firmly warded herself inside.
Trembling, she took a seat on her bed and tried to still the frantic pounding in her chest. Maeven fluttered wildly in her cage, clearly indicating she wanted to get out, but Ginny scarcely heard her. Every time she attempted to put together a coherent thought over what had just happened she was brought back to the sensation of kissing Harry and it was just too surreal. Embarrassment was starting to rear its ugly head when a sharp knock on the door caused her heart to thud painfully.
"Ginny, open the door."
Despite being relieved to hear Hermione's voice, she hesitated.
"Ginny Weasley, open and unward this door this instant. You know you're not allowed to put wards up in the dormitory."
Scrambling off of her bed, she quickly complied with the order and Hermione swept in, an authoritative presence swirling in pale peach. She looked exceptionally calm and that fact alone made Ginny hope whatever had transpired between Ron and Harry had ended reasonably. Closing the door firmly behind her, Hermione led them to sit on Ginny's bed.
"Are you all right?"
"Yes." She looked at the floor. "Well, no. Not really."
"What happened?"
"Well.I.Harry didn't say anything?"
At this, Hermione let out a sigh. "Of course not. He's Harry, remember? He stopped talking altogether three minutes into Ron's screaming at him. Your brother is absolutely livid, by the way, but he couldn't come up to see you himself-the alarms would go off. I left them both in the Common Room. They're actively sulking at one another."
At this, Ginny forced a nervous, shaky laugh and Hermione squeezed her arm gently.
"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but I'm here to help, if you need me."
She bit her lip in frustration. On the one hand, it was comforting to have someone to confide in. On the other, this felt.private. It was odd to be thinking in these terms. As someone used to asking advice and leaning on others when need be, she'd never been in a position to have something happen to her that she didn't want to share with anyone.
"I won't tell anyone, Ginny." Her friend laid an encouraging hand on her shoulder. "Not Ron. Not Harry."
"I know you won't, Hermione," she said softly. "But it's the type of thing that's so personal that.I just don't know."
There was almost a full minute of silence before either of one them spoke again.
"Well, whatever it was, at least yours wasn't the only fiasco this evening."
"What?" Ginny said.
"Cho Chang broke up with Michael Corner about an hour ago."
"What?" Ginny repeated, a bit more forcefully this time. "Why?"
Hermione gave her a pained look.
"Is it because of Harry?" she asked in a shocked voice.
"Uhm.no." Hermione bit her lip. "Actually, it's because of.well, because of you."
"What?!" Ginny's eyes widened. "What do you mean?"
Hermione appeared as though she really didn't want to elaborate but after receiving a rather desperate look from the other girl, she did. "Cho broke up with Michael because, according to her, he still fancies you." Ginny's mouth fell open but Hermione continued as though she hadn't noticed. "From what I understand, he's been acting strangely for quite some time and tonight was the breaking point because he just started ignoring her outright. So, she confronted him, they argued, and she ended it. She's been confiding in Harry for a while now because she said she understands how he must have felt competing with the specter of Cedric Diggory. Evidently Cho still really likes Michael, though, and wants advice." She paused then. "Which, in my mind, proves she's still utterly daft as who asks for advice on this sort of thing from Harry?"
When Ginny failed to respond, Hermione sighed. "The only reason I know any of this is because she spent a good twenty minutes crying into Harry's robes about the whole mess and Ron overheard. I wasn't planning on telling you, but I saw the way you were looking at them before you left and I didn't want you to have the wrong impression. If that's what your fight was about, I can assure you that Harry really doesn't fancy Cho Chang any more."
Ginny shook her head almost violently then. "No, that wasn't it at all.." So many things were starting to snap into place with blinding alacrity that she hardly knew what to say, especially because she felt herself hurtling towards a conclusion that was oddly terrifying. Feeling a surge of gratitude towards Hermione, she suddenly looked up at her friend. "We were fighting because he.he kissed me." The words tumbled forth on their own and she felt as though a burden had been lifted the moment they were out.
Hermione's eyes widened slightly, but she didn't look particularly surprised. "I see." She paused as though selecting her words carefully. "Were you running from him because it was.an unpleasant experience for you?"
A thoughtful look crossed Ginny's face. "No," she said finally. "Not entirely. I think it was just much too unexpected." She blushed. "Right before he did it, he was so angry I half expected him to hit me."
For the first time since she'd entered the room, Hermione fully relaxed. "Ah, so that's it." She gave Ginny a lopsided grin. "Trust Harry to go about things in the most idiotic way humanly possible, eh?"
At this, Ginny gave her a genuine smile and nodded slightly. From there, talking about what had happened seemed easy. Hermione was an excellent listener, making appropriate sounds in all the right places and offering commentary only when Ginny needed it. By the time she'd recounted the whole tale she felt, if not better, at least more ordered and confident in what had happened.
Unfortunately, their conversation was forced to a premature end when Charlotte Burns walked in, sleepily oblivious, carrying her white kitten heel shoes in her hand. "Evening all." She yawned as she tossed the shoes onto her bed and wandered into the loo.
Darting Ginny a look, Hermione suppressed a yawn as well and stood up. "I think they're all coming back now. I'd best get to the Common Room and make sure that everyone makes it to bed smoothly. Do you think you'll be all right? Would you like to come over to my room in a bit to talk this through more?"
"No, I think I'll be fine for the rest of this evening although I do want to speak with you again tomorrow. Thank you for everything, though. Really."
Hermione merely shook her head. "You can always come to me, you know. I admit I'm hardly one to be properly knowledgeable about this sort of thing, but I'm happy to listen. It's rather aggravating being stuck with the boys all the time." She paused then, her hand on the doorknob. "Ginny, you don't want to talk to him, do you? Tonight, I mean."
"No.I.no." She leaned back and tried to quell the pounding in her head. "I think I'll talk to him tomorrow."
"Very good. Then I'll be sure not to say anything when I go down there. Good night." She started to close the door.
Ginny nodded absentmindedly until a thought suddenly occurred to her and she sat up. "Oh, but Hermione?"
"Yes?" she responded, poking her head back into the room.
"Actually, I do need you to tell him something for me. Please make sure." she sighed. "Please make sure he knows I'm not angry with him."
Hermione's eyes softened with sympathy. "Of course," she said, smiling one last time before disappearing once again, shutting the door behind her with a gentle click.
~*~
End Part Nine
A/N: The dance might be over, but the evening is not. Stay tuned for part ten.
Getting to the party had been such a ridiculous production that it was rather anti-climactic to realize that no one so much as looked up at their entrance.
Well, almost no one.
Ginny had been the last to be pulled through the door and she had released Luna's hand upon crossing the threshold so as to close it behind her. Leaning heavily against the wood, her eyes skimmed her surroundings, drinking in the scene around her. The room was filled with what appeared to be well over two hundred students, mostly Gryffindors and Ravenclaws, but with a substantial number of Hufflepuffs and, Ginny was surprised to note, a handful of Slytherins. The Slytherins seemed to be composed primarily of younger students and they were standing together near one of the fireplaces in what she considered a decidedly anti-social sort of way.
A gentle waltz was already playing but no one had taken to the dance floor just yet. She spotted Seamus and Lavender sitting by the fire with Katie and Dean. Luna had run over to greet some Ravenclaws Ginny recognized, dragging Neville along with her. Cho Chang was a part of that group, although Michael Corner wasn't with her. It took Ginny a moment before she spotted him leaning against the wall on the other side of the room, saying something to Ernie MacMillan.
Her brother's red hair caught her eye then and she realized why he and Hermione had made a beeline directly to the food table upon entering the dance. Harry was standing there with Hannah Abbot in her deep scarlet colored robes. Ginny fully expected him to ignore her completely, but was incredibly surprised when their eyes met across the sea of people and a look of pure anguish crossed his face. Every nasty plan she had envisioned for him on the way over from the Common Room flew out of her mind as she was suddenly overcome with the need to make amends. The thought had no sooner registered in her mind when Harry suddenly pushed past Ron and headed in her direction, closing the gap between them with long, purposeful strides.
Tonks abruptly filled Ginny's line of vision, blocking her view of Harry altogether. "I thought I was going to have an aneurysm, what with you and Hermione sauntering in nearly an hour late." Clad in pale green robes that reminded Ginny of Blaise Zabini's eyes, she was in her natural state, her dark brown hair pulled up in sleek ponytail. "What took you so long?"
Startled, Ginny took a moment to respond. "Oh, I'm sorry about that. There was a bit of a crisis and it's my fault, really." She tried to angle herself in such a way that she could see around the Auror. "Everything looks lovely, though. You and Hermione outdid yourselves."
Her comment clearly did little to appease Tonks's irritation, but that quickly became a moot point when the lights suddenly flashed a dark red. Tonks jumped, startled, and Ginny saw a flash of black hair behind her.
From that point on, the party was thrown into a sort of organized chaos. Students began darting every which way, some diving behind the furniture, others sneaking under the food table. Neville and Luna collided with a few of the young Slytherins in their mad dash, but they all managed to pick themselves up and run for cover behind some window curtains. Before she could think of where to run, she suddenly felt someone grab her arm and was surprised to see that Hermione was yanking her behind the enchanted fir closest to the door. Ginny saw her brother run past and drag Harry to a dark corner unlit by the fireplaces.
"Oh, blast! Tonks looked around wildly as the last of the students scampered out of sight and she frantically started smoothing down her robes. "Shush, everyone, shush!" The stifled laughter echoing around the room quickly stopped. "Finite Incantatem," she muttered, causing the red light to fade just as the doorknob turned.
"Tonks?" The sound of Professor Lupin's tentative call made Ginny surge forward in anticipation.
He nudged the door open a bit more and it was about then that she heard Hermione gasp softly next to her. Unlike the other occupants of the room, they could see him fairly well from their vantage point and the light from the hall flooded in behind him, illuminating his profile. In addition to being dressed in better robes than Harry and Ron, his longish hair had been carefully brushed back from his face and he was smiling into the darkness in a way that made him almost shockingly handsome. Ginny had never seen him look so genuinely happy but she knew that Hermione hadn't gasped because of what he was wearing or how he looked. Instead, it had to do with what he was carrying. Peering between the branches of the fir, she could see that he held a massive bouquet of dark red roses behind his back.
She stole a glance at Tonks and it was clear that the Auror had spotted them too because instead of responding, she just stood there, illuminated by the soft glow of the fire, staring at where the red was showing from behind him.
"Tonks?" He stepped inside fully, his eyes adjusting to the dimmer light inside and, for the first time, he registered how different the room looked. "Tonks? What's all this?"
Her eyes flickered up to his and she just let out a small, awed laugh as though she still wasn't quite comprehending him but it was swallowed up by the collective shout of the students leaping out from their hiding places to announce their presence.
Lupin started, stepping away so quickly he was almost back out in the hall, but a shaky smile soon broke out over his face as he began to recognize the students rushing towards him. With a slight flick of his wrist, the flowers disappeared and he stepped back inside to greet them properly.
"Did you see.?" Hermione whispered unnecessarily.
"Yes." Ginny responded. Her friend gripped her arm for a moment as they exchanged looks of pure delight.
Ginny loved being in on the secret that, beneath her bookish exterior, Hermione Granger had the heart of a true romantic. Ever since Ron's shamelessly jealous tantrums over Viktor Krum had made Ginny aware of how highly he regarded her, she had taken the opportunity to observe the object of her brother's affections closely. The experience had been a particularly enlightening one and ever since then, Ginny had found herself approving of this odd, brainy, sometimes bossy, but always brilliant girl.
Luna moved to stand beside them. "Is there a reason why we're still hiding?" she asked quietly.
Both girls turned to look at her, embarrassed to realize that they were so riveted by what they'd seen that they had neglected to jump out with the rest of their friends.
"Uhm.no." Hermione smiled awkwardly. "I'm going to go and greet Professor Lupin. Ginny?"
She glanced over at the throng of students around him. "No, I think I'll do that in a bit. You can go on without me."
"Okay, then. I'll find you later."
"You know, Ginny, you really do look stunning," Luna said, once Hermione had gone. She turned to her date, who had been staring absent-mindedly at the food table. "Doesn't she, Neville?"
"Hm?" He looked at her vaguely.
"Just like a Siren," Luna continued.
"What?" Neville asked.
"Oh, now, really-" Ginny shook her head with an embarrassed laugh.
"No, you really do," Luna persisted. "With that red hair of yours and the white gown.it's just what I'd expect a Siren to look like." She turned to Neville again. "Neville, if you were a sailor and you heard Ginny singing, wouldn't you crash your ship on the rocks because she's so beautiful?"
His mouth opened and closed a few times before he settled on a slightly suspicious look as though he thought he'd been asked a trick question on purpose. "Ginny looks very nice," he said finally. "I'm going to get some food."
"I'll come with you," Luna said, taking his hand. "Hi, Harry."
She threw out the greeting with such causal flair that Ginny took a moment to realize what she'd said. Turning, she saw him standing off to the side, not five feet away, staring at her with an expression she'd never seen on his face before and, as such, couldn't interpret. She prayed silently that he hadn't heard the nonsensical conversation that had just taken place, as she wasn't particularly in the mood to be humiliated in front of him for the second time that evening.
He looked to be about to say something when Ron suddenly barreled by, grabbed him by the arm, and started hauling him away from her. "Harry, mate, I've been looking for you. Hermione needs help with something."
She knew the sound of Ron trying to avert disaster when she heard it and could clearly pick up the panicked undertones of his voice he was trying to pass off as urgency. She reckoned her brother was attempting to prevent another scene like the one that had taken place in the boys' dormitory.
Watching Harry get unceremoniously carted off, she couldn't quite fault Ron for his actions. Though she didn't have any intention of arguing with him in public, she had also come to the conclusion that their interactions were becoming increasingly volatile. She was calm now, but if he said something to provoke her, she couldn't altogether guarantee that she'd stay that way.
The crowd around Professor Lupin had thinned considerably once the music started playing as many students had rushed to the dance floor. Seeing an opportunity to greet him properly, Ginny made her way over just as he was dispatching the last of his well-wishers. Before she could get his attention, however, he started walking to where Tonks was standing a few feet away. She was regarding him with an awkward smile on her face, her fingertips resting lightly against her neck as she fiddled with a small round locket hanging from a silver chain.
They stood and stared at each other for what Ginny felt was an eternity before Lupin suddenly broke the prolonged silence by taking hold of her wrist. "I like your hair," he said, as he pulled her against him and embraced her tightly.
"Thank you," she responded softly, burrowing her face in his robes. Ginny was just starting to wonder if she should come back later when Tonks suddenly pulled out of his arms. She blinked up at him, her long lashes dancing in an exaggerated flutter. "You brought me flowers," she said cheekily, all evidence of awkwardness gone from her demeanor.
"Did I, now?" Lupin seemed amused.
"Yes you did and don't be coy with me, Remus Lupin. I saw them myself."
"Interesting." There was a hint of humor in his voice as he drew out the word and it made Ginny bite back a smile.
"Red roses, that's what they were." Tonks shook her head impatiently. "It's a bloody walking cliché, Remus. You ought to be ashamed of yourself."
He smirked. "Should I, now?"
"Where are they?" she asked abruptly.
"What?"
"My flowers. I want them. Where are they?"
"I thought you said they were clichéd."
"I know exactly what I said but that doesn't change the fact that they're mine and I want them."
He chuckled.
"Stop giving me that blasted look, old man, and bring me back my flowers." Tonks's angry façade was slipping and she sounded as though she was trying to hold back laughter of her own.
"Well, as you already seem to know so much about these alleged flowers I bought you," Lupin said calmly, "then I reckon that you should be able to find them yourself."
"Don't toy with me, Remus. I want those bloody flowers and I'm not above hurting you to get them."
His voice lowered and took on a decidedly different tone. "Would you, now?"
Her lips parted slightly in shock and she didn't respond.
Suddenly, he cleared his throat and stepped back, his voice returning to normal. "Well, as much as I'd like to take you up on your offer, Tonks, I'm afraid Miss Weasley would like a word with one of us."
Caught, Ginny froze in horror, her cheeks aflame. Tonks quickly turned to her, looking surprised but not embarrassed in the least.
"Hi Gin!" she said cheerfully, as Lupin slipped an arm around her waist in a friendly manner. "Everything all right?" Her eyes widened slightly then, her delicate features taking on a look of trepidation. "Merlin, it's not the food is it? Dobby hasn't poisoned everyone already, has he? I just knew that fruit platter looked strange."
"Er.no," Ginny responded, trying to control her blush. "I-I just wanted to say Merry Christmas to Professor Lupin."
"Ginny helped with all the planning, you know." Tonks tilted her chin up towards him and he smiled down at her in response. "She and Hermione were my partners in crime."
"Well, thank you, Ginny," Lupin responded, giving Tonks an affable squeeze. "You've both done such a wonderful job here."
"Actually, sir, Tonks is being modest-"
"Well, that's a first," he cut in and was rewarded with a gentle swat from the lady in question.
Strangely entertained by their behavior, Ginny almost lost her train of thought. "No, really, she did most of the work."
"Yes," the Auror said in a tragic voice, "I worked myself to the bone, I did. Going through magazines and looking at pictures, making Ginny handle all the food, having Hermione work on the room plan, bossing around house elves, oh the work I did.and what do I get? Nothing. Not one whit. Not a kind word, nor a single gesture of thanks."
"Wouldn't place bets on that just yet," Lupin muttered.
"Really? What are we betting on?" Tonks cocked her head and sent him an innocent smile. "The word or the gesture?"
"Right then!" Ginny said brightly, cutting off Lupin's response. She wasn't quite sure what she was bearing witness to but she was beginning to feel more and more like an intruder in the conversation. "I think I'll go check on that fruit platter you mentioned."
"Good thinking, Gin," Tonks said. "I'll catch up with you later."
"Thanks again, Ginny," Lupin added.
Vaguely relieved, she sped off in search of something to do. For the first half hour of the party, she found herself wandering the floor, greeting people, speaking with the elves and generally trying to keep herself occupied while the couples enjoyed the first few dances together. Hannah Abbott appeared to be keeping Harry properly distracted and, to a certain extent, Ginny was grateful. She wasn't quite sure what she would have said to him if he'd managed to speak with her before Ron intervened. Although she was indeed less angry than she had been, part of her knew the reason she was so quick to forgive his trespasses was because of how she felt about him. Given recent events that indicated the futility of such feelings, she thought it best to keep her distance while she sorted things out.
With that in mind, she continued wandering about the room, carrying on mindless conversations with partygoers and making sure everyone was being properly served. In the end, Seamus Finnegan was the one to save her from an evening of relentless boredom.
"Care to dance, Gin?" he said with a smile, pointing at his date Lavender, who was deep in conversation with Pavarti. "I doubt she'll even notice I've gone. I imagine they wish they'd come here with one another. Been ignoring me for the last twenty minutes, at least."
Smiling, she accepted and had a very pleasant conversation with him before Colin cut in towards the end of the song. From there, she took turns dancing with Neville, Amir, and Dennis but begged a break when Dean came to ask her because she was exhausted and needed the rest.
Wandering over to the food table to make sure that everything was in order, she was tapped on the shoulder by Professor McGonagall and quickly pulled in to a discussion about the Familiar's class. The conversation became even more engrossing when Professor Dumbledore joined them and they spent the next twenty minutes discussing her phoenix.
By the time Ginny broke free from her professors and located Dean again, he was standing near the fire with Katie and a large group of Gryffindors. Noticing her approach from afar, he quickly stood to meet her before they went off to the dance floor together.
Out of all the boys she'd danced with, Ginny found Dean most exhilarating, as he was just as enthusiastic as Neville when it came to effort but unlike poor Neville, he was also extremely skilled. She knew she was outclassed within the first two minutes of their dance and after that, it was all she could do to hold on and hope that she didn't fall. This was especially important in light of the fact that he took enormous pleasure out of spinning her around in wild circles to the point where they were both in hysterics.
By the end of the song, she found herself clinging to the front of his robes with her eyes closed, waiting until the dizziness subsided. Opening them for a brief second, she thought she glimpsed Harry looking in her direction from the edge of the dance floor but a wave of vertigo caused her to slide them shut before she could be certain. By the time the world righted itself enough for her to verify what she'd seen, he was gone. Quickly searching the crowd, she found him again, and was caught yet again by the desire to just go up and talk to him. The impulse instantly vanished when she saw him approached by, of all people, Cho Chang.
Unable to bear watching that particular exchange, Ginny bid Dean a swift farewell and resolved to move as far away from that part of the room as humanly possible.
In her search for somewhere else to be, she spotted Ron. A mildly anxious feeling invaded the pit of her stomach when she saw that he was standing by himself in a corner looking extremely agitated. Hermione was notably missing.
His failure to look up when she approached caused the dark feeling to deepen.
"Ron," she said carefully, "where is-"
"All I said was that it looked nice when it is the way it always is. Since when is that a bad thing?"
She blinked at him. "Pardon?"
"Her ruddy hair."
Ginny felt her stomach start sinking. "Oh no. Oh Ron, you didn't."
"It's Pavarti's fault, you know. She's the one who brought it up. She just kept going on and on about how amazing Hermione's hair looked and it just sort of got insulting, you know? Like her hair doesn't normally look nice or something. So then, all I said was that I sort of liked it better when it was done the other way and they just both gave me this LOOK." His face formed a bitter expression. "I mean, what's wrong with what I said? All I meant is that she doesn't need to do her hair up like that to look nice. She always looks nice." His ears turned pink and he sent his sister a slightly embarrassed glance before the accusatory look returned. "You girls. Always saying you want us to tell you the truth and constantly asking us for our opinion and then you get all huffy when give it. Bloody nutters, all of you."
It was a sad moment when Ginny realized that, on some perverse level, Ron was making sense. Luckily, she would never admit this aloud. These particular circumstances meant her loyalty to Hermione as a fellow girl trumped her loyalty to her brother. So, instead, she crossed her arms and glared at him.
"We're nutters? Hardly. The only reason we'd ever act nuts is because you boys drive us mad with your stupidity." And with that, she turned on her heel and went off in search of Hermione.
She quickly located the other girl sitting rigidly against the opposite wall, hiding rather effectively in one of the oversized armchairs. Bracing herself, Ginny approached. "I just spoke with Ron-"
"I am in no mood to exert the incredible amount of effort necessary to understand boys right now." Hermione stared darkly ahead.
"Neither am I." Ginny simply shrugged and took a seat. "Perhaps we can start a club."
"Hello, friends." Luna walked up to them, smiling radiantly in her deep blue robes. She was pulling Neville along behind her and he looked flustered, but happy.
There was an uncomfortable silence.
"Ah." Luna turned to her date. "They are cross. Perhaps you should leave for a bit."
Neville looked confused.
"Get me a cup of punch, please." She gave him an encouraging shove and this he seemed to understand.
"Oh, right. Right."
Once he had wandered out of earshot, Luna sat down beside Ginny and looked at her friends. "What's happened now?"
"Ron insulted her hair."
"Boys are so daft," Hermione burst out with such passion that Luna gave her a startled look. "No matter how direct you are with them, they never seem to understand what you're trying to say."
"Well, I'm always direct with Neville and he seems to understand what I'm trying to say."
"Yes, well, Neville is not nearly as thick as Ron," Ginny responded quickly, seeing the vexed look in Hermione's eyes.
"What about Harry?" Luna asked.
Ginny looked over at him and felt a flash of irritation to realize that he was still thoroughly entangled in his conversation with Cho. She then noted that Hannah Abbot was dancing with Ernie MacMillan. Typical. "Nobody is as thick as Harry," she said flatly.
Hermione looked thoughtful. "That's quite right, actually."
"Well, I suppose that's something in Ron's favor, isn't it?"
Despite themselves, they smiled at Luna's comment. A sudden crash diverted their attention to where Neville was standing several feet away, holding one cup of punch in his right hand and wearing what appeared to be the remains of another.
"Oh dear." Luna rushed to go help him.
Ginny's eyes followed the source of the accident, which appeared to be a rapidly departing Michael Corner. He was shoving roughly through the crowd of students on the dance floor. Moments later, he disappeared from the room altogether. Her attention flickered over to where Harry and Cho stood, huddled in their quiet conversation. They didn't seem to have noticed his exit. Ginny considered following her ex-boyfriend to see what was going on, but quickly decided against it. There was a reason she didn't get involved with other people's romances and this one was a bit too volatile and close to home for her tastes.
As if in response to her thoughts, Cho suddenly reached forward and hugged Harry, burying her face in his chest. Ginny tried to ignore the quiet twist in her heart but it was too late and she felt the remainder of her energy drain right out of her. Staying away from Harry when he was so close was proving to be just too emotionally burdensome for her to bear.
Hermione must have noticed the expression on her face, because she reached over and touched her arm. "Gin? Are you all right?'
The thought of lying and staying for the sake of her friends briefly flitted across her mind, but Ginny knew she'd be terrible company for the rest of the evening. "This was such a mistake. I knew I shouldn't have come at all." Turning to the other girls, she took a deep breath. "I think I'm going back to the dormitory."
"Oh, but it's not yet half past nine." Hermione looked concerned. "You can't leave so soon."
Ginny shook her head. "I've still got some packing left to do before tomorrow morning. If I leave now, I can get that done and get a decent night's sleep." Waving off the other girl's protests, she quietly hurried across the dance floor, stopping briefly to bid Tonks and Lupin farewell, before slipping out into the dark hallway. It was a relief when the door shut behind her, muffling the happy murmur of the other revelers.
Her mind awash in confused thoughts, Ginny was almost at the stairs that led to Gryffindor Tower when she glanced at the large doors leading to the grounds outside and suddenly had the urge for a quick turn about the lake. She reckoned that some fresh air would do her good. It also might stave off the light depression she felt weighing down upon her.
Glancing around furtively for Filch or Mrs. Norris, she swiftly made her escape.
The night air felt like a balm on her flushed cheeks and she breathed in deeply, filling her lungs with the intoxicating cold. The thinness of her dress robes meant she was quickly numb but it was a pleasant sort of feeling. So much less complicated than the way she normally felt.
It was strange, given how many truly horrible things had happened to her in the dark, that she still felt so at ease in it. She reckoned that Hagrid's cheery, well-lit cabin leant a certain degree of comfort, but that wasn't the only reason.
Coming down a gentle slope, she noted that the lake looked particularly lovely in its half-frozen beauty. Moonlight skimmed the thin ice that partially covered the surface, bathing its roughed edges in a pale silver glow. She soaked in the vision, greedily committing it to memory. Perhaps that's why she enjoyed the night so much. Moments like these, she didn't have to share with anyone. It was as though, for the briefest snap of time, the lake, the grounds, the forest and all the splendor of the evening were hers and hers alone. As the youngest in a family of nine, it was no wonder she derived so much joy from these solitary strolls.
The sky glittered overwhelmingly with stars and it seemed the more Ginny gazed up at them, the more appeared before her. It was a pleasantly dizzying experience, walking along with her head tilted towards the heavens. Her slippers made a wonderful crunch against the frostbitten ground as each step took her farther from the castle.
And then, despite all efforts to the contrary, she felt it. That terrible straining sensation, as though something in her chest was trying to break free. Struggling for a moment, she finally gave up and let out a ragged sob as that muted sort of longing that had been a constant companion of hers for so long finally burst forth. For an instant, she hated herself. Hated the fact that, even surrounded by such astounding beauty, she couldn't distract herself from thinking of him.
Clenching her fists where they lay huddled under her robe, she managed to force down the tears that threatened dangerously to surface. Unfortunately, that terrible, keening hunger for him was as strong as ever. It was just downright senseless. She had tried, oh, how she had tried not to think of him this way. She had tried so hard to be his friend. Even when he was being downright cruel to her, she had found her heart only too ready to forgive him.
She wondered, idly, if she were broken somehow. If, somewhere between Tom Riddle and that night in the Ministry, she had been damaged irreparably in a way that no one could ever see or understand. That was the only plausible explanation she could come up with for her ridiculous emotional turmoil. Despite their terrible fight, she knew she couldn't even really get mad at Harry. Friends complimented each other all the time. From that perspective, he had never once done anything to make her believe she meant more to him than their friendship warranted.
And yet the frustration refused to abate because here she was, standing outside in the freezing cold, pining away for him like she did when she was ten years old. And where was he? Dancing obliviously in the warmth of the DA room with Cho Chang, most likely.
One of the secrets Ginny guarded most closely to her heart was the period of time, shortly after she had seen him board the Hogwarts Express his first year, that she prayed for him. To this day, she couldn't explain what had compelled her to do it, but she could still vividly recall having sat on her bed each night to fervently ask whatever powers that existed to keep him safe from harm. Each time she thought about it in subsequent years, she'd told herself that it was because she felt sorry for him and what Voldemort had done. Now, looking back, she wondered if that had been the beginning. If that had been some terrible foreshadowing for where she stood today.
Perhaps the most terrifying revelation was the knowledge that what she felt for him was starting to eat away at who she was. Simply put, she couldn't allow that. She wouldn't allow her feelings for him to subjugate her own identity. Ever since her time under the influence of Tom Riddle, Ginny had regarded her identity as precious. If the only solution to dealing with this inexplicable need she felt for him was to get away, to flee Hogwarts, or England, for that matter, then she'd seriously consider it.
The soft flap of wings above her head distracted her briefly and she glanced up, rather surprised to see a large owl gliding in circles twenty feet or so above her head. Confused, she squinted into the inky darkness and was rewarded for her efforts by being struck in the face by a small piece of parchment. Stooping, she picked it up from where it had fallen on the ground and unfolded it.
It was blank.
The whole thing was so odd, she started to feel a prickling fear start up her spine. Perhaps the dark wasn't the best place to be right then. Suddenly, Hagrid's hut looked much farther away than it had before and Ginny quickly started to walk back towards the castle. She was startled to a standstill, however, when the owl that had dropped the parchment alighted on a tree branch overhead and she got a good look at it.
Hedwig.
Her ears pricked up then and she heard the barely audible crunch of hurried footsteps on the icy ground. Turning towards the noise, she saw him, striding towards her from the distance. When she heard him call her name, she knew it was too late. He had already spotted her and she no longer had the option to slip away or blend in to the shadows and wait for him to pass. She felt the dark, wispy tendrils of anger curl around her stomach as she watched him approach. At one of the only times in her life when he was absolutely the last person she wanted to see, he had somehow managed to find her.
"Ginny--" he sounded out of breath "--I've been looking everywhere for you. Hermione said you'd gone back to the dormitory-"
"What are you doing here?"
There was a moment of silence since they'd asked the question simultaneously and neither seemed willing to respond first.
In that brief interlude, he composed himself enough to register the look on her face and it seemed to quickly spur him forward. "You're still angry with me, aren't you?"
The flash of surprise she felt at the rare appearance of his sensible side simply transformed into bitterness and fueled her increasing irritation. Knowing almost immediately that this conversation could not lead to anything useful, she concluded it would be best to keep it as brief as possible. "No, actually, I'm not. I'm only tired. I was just going in to bed, as a matter of fact. Good evening." She made to walk past him, only to be stopped again when he reached out and snagged hold of her arm.
"No, Ginny, please wait. I-I need to apologize for what I said."
Yes, because that was exactly what she needed: another empty apology from the famous Harry Potter that was only aimed at assuaging his own guilt.
"Look, I'm not angry with you. I understand you're sorry. You needn't apologize." She tried to shrug off his hand, but his grip was ironclad.
"Yes, I do." He sounded so inanely calm and patient she wanted to hit him. He reached up and took hold of her forearms, effectively trapping her. "You are still angry with me. I can hear it in your voice."
"Honestly, Potter, for your information the sun, the earth and the heavens do NOT revolve around you. And, while we're on the subject, neither do I." He looked shocked by her outburst and, for some reason, she derived a degree of pleasure from that. "Now let me go."
"You don't understand, you-you're not letting me explain-"
"Explain? Explain what? That you're only nice to me when it suits you? What makes you think you have to explain that?"
"What?" In contrast to her increasingly pronounced reaction to his presence, he just seemed to be retreating. "What do you mean?" His voice was just a few notches above a whisper.
"You know, you've really got some nerve, Potter." She was almost shouting at him now, and there was something wonderful about the horrified, hurt expression he was giving her. "Let me ask you something: where's Cho?"
He shook his head, clearly unnerved. "Cho? What does Cho have to do with this?"
Good. She was glad she had some impact on him. Lord knows she was sick and tired of being the only one impacted by their relationship. "Wonderful question. I have no idea what Cho has to do with anything. It's never made any sense, as far as I'm concerned. First you fancied her. Now Michael does. During the Yule Ball you ignored Pavarti Patil you were so busy mooning over her, this time you did the same to Hannah Abbot." She suppressed the urge to laugh in his face. "Now, if Cho has nothing to do with your behavior, then perhaps you'll enlighten me as to why Hannah Abbot is dancing with Ernie MacMillan?"
He had started trembling at some point during her speech and now just stared at her, as though frozen in place.
Undeterred, the floodgates all but rubble, she proceeded to mercilessly beat down on the one subject that had tormented her for so many years. "What's wrong? Is it that she isn't as good a dancer as you'd hoped?"
"No."
"Is it that she isn't as smart and interesting as you thought she was?"
"No."
"Is it that she isn't as mentally stable as she ought to be?" This particular accusation brought her the most sadistic pleasure.
"No."
"Then what, Harry? What completely absurd flaw have you found in poor Hannah that's sent you fleeing out here? What is it?"
"It's that she isn't you."
Ginny's mouth snapped shut.
Of all the things he could have chosen to say, that was perhaps the most wrong. It was also the only thing that completely halted her erratic downward spiral into insanity. And that's when she noticed it. That look in his eyes that made her all but stop breathing.
What she had misconstrued as resignation and withdrawal was, in fact, a slow emotional coiling. A feeling of horror crept into her when she awoke to the fact that the trembling she'd felt wasn't from sadness or cold but from fury. She could see it now and couldn't understand how she'd missed it. The hot, burning fury in his eyes had turned the green to black and it was mixed with something else. Something she couldn't even begin to bring herself to identify.
"You asked why I've been acting like a prat when you've been trying to be my friend." The quiet strain in his voice terrified her so badly she couldn't even bring herself to nod.
"Well," he continued in a harsh, hoarse voice, "it's because you're not my friend. We can't be friends."
This time, the anguish forced a response. "Why?!"
And that's when he kissed her. Hard.
Just when she thought she'd heard her heart breaking, he'd tightened his hold on her arms and jerked her forward with such force that she stumbled against him. The next thing she knew, his mouth was on her own and she was being struck with a dark, bruising kiss.
After the first electric shock from contact, all she could do was stand there, rooted to the spot, her hands braced against his chest. She could feel his heart beating wildly under her fingertips as he plunged forward, growing increasingly aggressive.
Her numbed senses slowly started to return and she made a weak attempt to slow him down, but to no avail. All she could do was try to keep up with him while he poured all his anger and frustration into her. It was bloody awkward, as she couldn't figure how to turn her head he was moving so fast, and her body was locked into place. In her limited experience with boys, she'd never been kissed like this before. Like she was being attacked. Somewhere in the back of her head, she realized that it was her fault.
She was the reason Harry Potter had lost control.
His lips molded against hers so brutally then that pleasure spiked into pain. Letting out a low moan she tried to pull away. She struggled against him and for the briefest moment managed to break free with a loud smack, gasping for air.
"Ow, Harry, it hurts-" The rest of the sentence died when she saw the hungry fascination in his eyes. He was still staring at her mouth. Something about that made her weak.
The moment hung with delicious anticipation and, with a soft growl, he reached for her again.
She met him part way this time.
His fingers tangled warmly in her hair, with a tenderness that she didn't think he was capable of, given his behavior moments before. She gasped against him in response and he slid his tongue softly against her parted lips as he gently tilted her head, deepening the kiss. His mouth began slanting possessively over hers again and again as he moaned softly, sending pleasant vibrations against her lips that echoed through her body.
An unbearable heat started to permeate her then, coupled with a painful ache in the pit of her stomach. The initial shock had fully worn off and she was awakening to a myriad of distracting details. The butter-soft feel of his dress robes under her hands, the spicy scent of some cologne he'd put on for the occasion, the incredible weight of his body pressed against her own, and finally, the evidence of his need for her.
A frantic thought tore through her mind then and she suddenly found herself acting on instinct. He was clearly unprepared for the desperate shove she gave him since he stumbled back a few steps, chest heaving, face frozen in shock as he stared at her.
"What.what.what are you.?" Tears pricked her eyes, as words failed her. This didn't make sense. None of this made sense. Her body was flooded with so many conflicting emotions that she felt ill. "Harry.I can't. It's just too much right now and I just-I can't."
"Ginny, wait, I-I shouldn't have-" He stepped forward, confusion and sadness battling on his handsome features but she quickly moved away from him.
"I'm sorry, Harry. I'm so sorry." And with that, she turned on her heel and sprinted towards the castle as fast as she could. She heard him calling her name, but her jumbled nerves only urged her to run faster. She was almost to the door when she realized with horror that, instead of letting her go as she had thought he would, he had taken off after her. She was lighter, but he was stronger and years of Quidditch meant that he was rapidly catching up.
Flinging open the front door, she almost barreled directly into Ron and Hermione who were standing at the foot of the stairs. She managed to dart out of the way at the last second, ignoring the surprised shout from Ron as she raced past them, heart in her throat.
Half way up the stairs she heard a second bang from the door, indicating that Harry had just made it inside as well. He called out to her again, but she leapt up the stairs faster. Turning to the next flight, she heard the distinct sounds of a scuffle and angry shouting erupt from below.
"Get off of me!"
"Just what the hell is going on?"
Recognizing her brother's voice, she felt a shock of gratitude that almost left her weak with relief.
"RON! Let go!"
"Bugger that! Did you just make my sister CRY?"
Surprised, she suddenly became aware of the wetness on her cheeks, but it was too much to contemplate at the moment and she simply concentrated on getting back to her dormitory. Taking up three more flights of stairs and six more corridors, she finally made it to Gryffindor Tower. Rounding a corner, she shouted "BogeyBots" down the hall and the Fat Lady swung open just in time for her to scramble through the hole.
"Slow down, dear. Goodness. Slow down!"
But Ginny couldn't slow down. Moving so quickly that the Gryffindor tapestries were just a red and gold blur, she bolted through the Common Room. It was blissfully deserted as most of the students were still at the party. She felt her lungs burn as she ran up the stairs to the fifth year dormitories but only allowed herself to catch her breath after she had slammed the door shut and firmly warded herself inside.
Trembling, she took a seat on her bed and tried to still the frantic pounding in her chest. Maeven fluttered wildly in her cage, clearly indicating she wanted to get out, but Ginny scarcely heard her. Every time she attempted to put together a coherent thought over what had just happened she was brought back to the sensation of kissing Harry and it was just too surreal. Embarrassment was starting to rear its ugly head when a sharp knock on the door caused her heart to thud painfully.
"Ginny, open the door."
Despite being relieved to hear Hermione's voice, she hesitated.
"Ginny Weasley, open and unward this door this instant. You know you're not allowed to put wards up in the dormitory."
Scrambling off of her bed, she quickly complied with the order and Hermione swept in, an authoritative presence swirling in pale peach. She looked exceptionally calm and that fact alone made Ginny hope whatever had transpired between Ron and Harry had ended reasonably. Closing the door firmly behind her, Hermione led them to sit on Ginny's bed.
"Are you all right?"
"Yes." She looked at the floor. "Well, no. Not really."
"What happened?"
"Well.I.Harry didn't say anything?"
At this, Hermione let out a sigh. "Of course not. He's Harry, remember? He stopped talking altogether three minutes into Ron's screaming at him. Your brother is absolutely livid, by the way, but he couldn't come up to see you himself-the alarms would go off. I left them both in the Common Room. They're actively sulking at one another."
At this, Ginny forced a nervous, shaky laugh and Hermione squeezed her arm gently.
"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but I'm here to help, if you need me."
She bit her lip in frustration. On the one hand, it was comforting to have someone to confide in. On the other, this felt.private. It was odd to be thinking in these terms. As someone used to asking advice and leaning on others when need be, she'd never been in a position to have something happen to her that she didn't want to share with anyone.
"I won't tell anyone, Ginny." Her friend laid an encouraging hand on her shoulder. "Not Ron. Not Harry."
"I know you won't, Hermione," she said softly. "But it's the type of thing that's so personal that.I just don't know."
There was almost a full minute of silence before either of one them spoke again.
"Well, whatever it was, at least yours wasn't the only fiasco this evening."
"What?" Ginny said.
"Cho Chang broke up with Michael Corner about an hour ago."
"What?" Ginny repeated, a bit more forcefully this time. "Why?"
Hermione gave her a pained look.
"Is it because of Harry?" she asked in a shocked voice.
"Uhm.no." Hermione bit her lip. "Actually, it's because of.well, because of you."
"What?!" Ginny's eyes widened. "What do you mean?"
Hermione appeared as though she really didn't want to elaborate but after receiving a rather desperate look from the other girl, she did. "Cho broke up with Michael because, according to her, he still fancies you." Ginny's mouth fell open but Hermione continued as though she hadn't noticed. "From what I understand, he's been acting strangely for quite some time and tonight was the breaking point because he just started ignoring her outright. So, she confronted him, they argued, and she ended it. She's been confiding in Harry for a while now because she said she understands how he must have felt competing with the specter of Cedric Diggory. Evidently Cho still really likes Michael, though, and wants advice." She paused then. "Which, in my mind, proves she's still utterly daft as who asks for advice on this sort of thing from Harry?"
When Ginny failed to respond, Hermione sighed. "The only reason I know any of this is because she spent a good twenty minutes crying into Harry's robes about the whole mess and Ron overheard. I wasn't planning on telling you, but I saw the way you were looking at them before you left and I didn't want you to have the wrong impression. If that's what your fight was about, I can assure you that Harry really doesn't fancy Cho Chang any more."
Ginny shook her head almost violently then. "No, that wasn't it at all.." So many things were starting to snap into place with blinding alacrity that she hardly knew what to say, especially because she felt herself hurtling towards a conclusion that was oddly terrifying. Feeling a surge of gratitude towards Hermione, she suddenly looked up at her friend. "We were fighting because he.he kissed me." The words tumbled forth on their own and she felt as though a burden had been lifted the moment they were out.
Hermione's eyes widened slightly, but she didn't look particularly surprised. "I see." She paused as though selecting her words carefully. "Were you running from him because it was.an unpleasant experience for you?"
A thoughtful look crossed Ginny's face. "No," she said finally. "Not entirely. I think it was just much too unexpected." She blushed. "Right before he did it, he was so angry I half expected him to hit me."
For the first time since she'd entered the room, Hermione fully relaxed. "Ah, so that's it." She gave Ginny a lopsided grin. "Trust Harry to go about things in the most idiotic way humanly possible, eh?"
At this, Ginny gave her a genuine smile and nodded slightly. From there, talking about what had happened seemed easy. Hermione was an excellent listener, making appropriate sounds in all the right places and offering commentary only when Ginny needed it. By the time she'd recounted the whole tale she felt, if not better, at least more ordered and confident in what had happened.
Unfortunately, their conversation was forced to a premature end when Charlotte Burns walked in, sleepily oblivious, carrying her white kitten heel shoes in her hand. "Evening all." She yawned as she tossed the shoes onto her bed and wandered into the loo.
Darting Ginny a look, Hermione suppressed a yawn as well and stood up. "I think they're all coming back now. I'd best get to the Common Room and make sure that everyone makes it to bed smoothly. Do you think you'll be all right? Would you like to come over to my room in a bit to talk this through more?"
"No, I think I'll be fine for the rest of this evening although I do want to speak with you again tomorrow. Thank you for everything, though. Really."
Hermione merely shook her head. "You can always come to me, you know. I admit I'm hardly one to be properly knowledgeable about this sort of thing, but I'm happy to listen. It's rather aggravating being stuck with the boys all the time." She paused then, her hand on the doorknob. "Ginny, you don't want to talk to him, do you? Tonight, I mean."
"No.I.no." She leaned back and tried to quell the pounding in her head. "I think I'll talk to him tomorrow."
"Very good. Then I'll be sure not to say anything when I go down there. Good night." She started to close the door.
Ginny nodded absentmindedly until a thought suddenly occurred to her and she sat up. "Oh, but Hermione?"
"Yes?" she responded, poking her head back into the room.
"Actually, I do need you to tell him something for me. Please make sure." she sighed. "Please make sure he knows I'm not angry with him."
Hermione's eyes softened with sympathy. "Of course," she said, smiling one last time before disappearing once again, shutting the door behind her with a gentle click.
~*~
End Part Nine
A/N: The dance might be over, but the evening is not. Stay tuned for part ten.