A/N: Several people made a suggestion about something having to do with
Maeven that will be addressed in this part. As Comet Moon was the first
person to mention it, she gets the credit. :)
A/N2: Just to clarify a point that appears to be causing much confusion: In American terms, Ginny removed her robe while with Harry-not her nightgown. There was absolutely no nudity and certainly no shagging in the previous chapter-at least as far as I know. ;)
Chapter 11: Grey
She was drifting.
Drifting in a sea of warmth and colors and softness that flowed over her body and enveloped her senses. Snatches of memories slipped through every so often and she caught glimpses of things she hadn't noticed the first time around. The drugged look in his dark green eyes between kisses, the initial moment when his hand had tightened reflexively on her thigh, the soft sound he'd made when he'd broken away from her.it was all there, buried deep in the recesses of her subconscious.
She could almost feel him, even now, as he ran his fingers through her hair. The gentle tugging sensation it had caused gradually became so real that, for one brief moment on the edge between sleep and wakefulness, Ginny wondered if Harry had finally found a way to come to her.
That's when her eyes flew open and she sat up with a start.
Maeven dropped the piece of hair she had been holding in her beak and fluttered around excitedly, chiming. Ginny fell backwards onto her pillow in disappointment.
Hazarding a glance at her clock, she was horrified to realize that she had less than half an hour to meet her brother to go to the train station and she hadn't quite finished packing. Sleep had only begun to tug at her eyes minutes before she was scheduled to wake up and, despite her efforts not to, she had succumbed to it. Half sliding, half tumbling out of bed, she darted for the loo, shrugging off the last remnants of her dream in her all- encompassing panic to get downstairs.
Running back in to the room a few minutes later, she saw some of the house elves hauling the last of her dormitory mates' luggage out the door. A bit worried about her own disorganized state, she muttered a few haphazard spells, and split her attention between the items dancing into her trunk behind her back and her appearance in the mirror in front of her. Though she had never been one to expend a large amount effort on the way she looked, she was nevertheless cursing herself for having overslept, as she really would have liked a few extra minutes to prepare this morning.
Pulling a brush through her hair, she was dismayed to find it more tangled and uncooperative than usual. Since she didn't have time to plait it, she reckoned she'd have tie it up in a ponytail if she wanted to make an attempt at looking half-way decent. Maeven started chiming rather desperately then and Ginny's eyes flickered to the reflection of the bird behind her. Somehow, in her general enthusiasm to be helpful, her Familiar had managed to get caught inside the suitcase and was getting cheerfully buried under Ginny's dancing clothes.
The brush still caught in her hair, she quickly sped over, extracted the phoenix, and took the opportunity to grab a skirt, shirt, and some robes to wear. The act of dressing was what ultimately calmed her down as it didn't take very long and allowed her to fully appreciate how completely stupid she was being.
There was a reason why she disliked the general hysteria many of the other girls flung themselves into when they fancied a boy. Preparing for something as mundane as dinner would quickly become a chore and Ginny reckoned that if she could resist succumbing to that level of insanity for Michael, she could do the same for Harry. She was also convinced that Harry would simply die of embarrassment if he knew she was expending any effort on looking nice for him when she really should be concentrating on packing.
And so, yanking the brush through her hair, she abandoned the mirror entirely in favor of getting the last of her things in her trunk in time to be taken to the train. Mission accomplished, she was so busy congratulating herself on being sensible that she was able to pause and put on a bit of extra lip-gloss without having it weigh significantly on her conscience.
Maeven politely ignored this questionable behavior and flew obediently after Ginny as she hurriedly made her way down the stairs.
Upon entering the Common Room, the first thing she saw was Dean Thomas talking excitedly with Katie Bell next to the Portrait Hole. He was still dressed in his pajamas while she was pulling on her scarf. Doing a quick visual sweep for Harry, Ginny was exceedingly disappointed to realize that he didn't appear to be there yet. The only other students present consisted of a few fourth years playing exploding snap near the fire and Ron and Hermione sitting side by side engrossed in a book. Well, Hermione was dutifully reading the book and saying something while Ron was dutifully staring at her profile.
She wondered idly what would happen if she tried to skirt past Hermione and up to the boys' dormitory to look for Harry when she noticed that one of the fourth years was staring at her. Rather indiscreetly, he nudged one of his friends and before long the whole group was alternately glancing in her direction and whispering in subdued tones.
Momentarily confused, Ginny frowned at them before she was struck by something that hadn't, until that point, occurred to her.
No one knew.
Biting her lip, Ginny realized that a large number of students had seen the fall out from the fight and had heard Ron shouting at Harry for making her cry, but no one, her brother included, was privy to what had happened afterwards.
With an almost tangible sadness, she realized that every lovely scenario she had envisioned of running across the room and throwing herself into Harry's arms as soon as she laid eyes on him was no longer an option. Not unless she wanted to raise unending questions regarding her change of behavior and risk admitting that she'd visited his room late at night. Ginny wasn't quite sure she cared what people thought of the fact that she'd gone to see him as her intentions, at least initially, had been completely noble. She'd gone there to pound him senseless for being an idiot. What had happened thereafter.well, that wasn't entirely her fault. Neither was it anyone's business.
Unfortunately, no matter how much sense that reasoning made to Ginny, she knew with near certainty that Harry would loathe the intrusive questions they would be subjected to and that was something she definitely cared about.
Deciding that the best course of action would be to reign in her enthusiasm for the time being, Ginny felt the most normal thing to do while waiting for Harry to come down would be to join her brother. Before she could begin to make her way over, however, Ron saw her standing there and leapt to his feet, leaving Hermione in mid-sentence.
Walking up, he wordlessly put an arm around her shoulders, pulled her forward and planted a hard kiss on her forehead. Surprised, she smiled into his robes in response. Ever since he'd started Hogwarts, Ron had made it clear that he wasn't one for public displays of affection. This change hadn't been particularly unexpected as the twins had done the same thing, but it had been a difficult adjustment for her as they had been closest in age and had been closest growing up.
"You all right?" he asked gruffly as he pulled away.
"Yes, thanks."
Nodding briskly, he removed his arm from her shoulders and grinned. "I don't choose sides, you know."
As he had been exceptionally kind to her these past two days, she decided not to argue. "I know, Ron. I know."
There was a significant pause.
"I don't think he's coming, so don't worry," he whispered suddenly.
"Who?" Ginny asked.
"Harry."
"What?" Her heart sank.
Ron shrugged casually, but it came out looking forced. "Dobby came in to our room early this morning and woke him up. Said Dumbledore wanted to see him."
"What?!" Ginny moaned. "Wait- is everything all right?"
A worried look briefly flitted across his features. "I reckon as much.I mean, he hasn't left Hogwarts so he should be fine."
"But do you know for sure, Ron?" Ginny asked.
He paused. "No, but Hermione is staying here. She said she'll check up on him as soon as she sees us off." He gave her a vaguely suspicious look. "I thought you didn't want to talk to him anyway."
"Well, yes," she stammered, "I didn't, but that was last night. I was hoping to straighten things out with him before we left."
"Ah, well, Mum said she'd owl Dumbledore and see if she can convince him to let Harry join us for Christmas Day, so you might get your chance then."
"Oh." She tried to mask the defeated look that threatened to break over her face but realized it wasn't necessary because Ron had stopped paying attention. Following his gaze, she noted that Hermione was smiling and waving them over, patting the two empty spaces on either side of her. As Ginny followed her brother over, a hand suddenly shot out and grabbed the sleeve of her robes. Spinning around, she was a bit startled to find herself looking down at Neville, who was seated alone on a sofa.
"Hi Gin," he said solemnly. "How are you?"
"Fine, Neville," she responded, concerned. "Are you all right? Did something happen with Luna?"
His face shifted momentarily from sadness to confusion. "Luna? No."
"Then what happened?"
His brow furrowed. "That's what I was going to ask you."
"What?"
He pulled her down closer as though telling a secret. "Listen Ginny, I-I heard about you and Harry and.if you want to talk about it...." he trailed off awkwardly.
Unsure of what to say, she moved to take a seat next to him. Keeping this a secret - even temporarily - wasn't going to be nearly as easy as she'd thought and she felt bad lying to poor Neville. Especially when he looked so devastated on her behalf. Unfortunately, as close as they were, the notion of admitting to him that she had snogged Harry last night was so far beyond the realm of reality in her mind that she had no choice but to find another way to assuage his misery.
Settling down with a heavy sigh, she tried to think of what she could offer him by way of the truth without getting too.graphic. "I don't know how to explain it, Neville. Sometimes Harry just.he just acts a bit strange is all. We both overreacted last night, but it's over now."
"Did he try to hurt you?" Neville asked suddenly, causing Ginny to almost choke.
"What?"
"I heard he was chasing you and Ron stopped him. Did he try to hurt you, Gin?"
She paused, stunned. "No, of course he didn't."
"You'd tell me if he did, wouldn't you? Because...if he did, I'd-I'd do something about it." He was eyeing her carefully and despite her shock over his accusations, she couldn't help but feel touched. When Ron was overprotective it only served to irritate her, but with Neville, it was different. Perhaps it was because she knew how contrary it was to his nature to act this way. It wasn't that he lacked bravery -- he was a Gryffindor after all -- but Neville just plain disliked fighting. This was a quality she deeply respected in him, even though she didn't share it herself. Ginny knew beyond a doubt that if their positions were reversed, and she felt he had been wronged, she wouldn't have thought twice about hexing the other party into next week.
Curling up against him, she smiled and hugged his arm. "I'd tell you if he did, I promise." She had expected him to squirm away in response to her touch, but when he didn't she laid her head comfortingly on his shoulder. "We just had a fight is all and he was trying to apologize and I was too angry to hear him."
"All right, then." Neville responded, staring at the fire. After a few moments of silence, he took a deep breath. "You know, Ginny, Harry's great.usually..I don't know why he acts the way he does sometimes. I-I really don't think he means to.do what he does, Ginny. I mean, he really does..value your opinion on..on..things.."
She pulled away from him then, her eyes narrowing slightly.
Clearly responding to the suspicious look she was giving him, Neville's eyes widened. "I'm just guessing, is all, from-from what I've heard. I mean- seen."
It was with an emotion torn slightly between horror and endless amusement that Ginny realized she had never stopped to really think about Neville's relationship to anyone but Luna and herself. She had simply assumed that all three of them had been forsaken by the Three Musketeers at the start of the year and that, due to the fact Ron was her brother, she was the closest bridge between the two groups.
However, Neville was a year older than she and Luna so he spent much more time with Ron, Hermione and Harry by virtue of their classes alone. Neville and Harry had also shared the experience of being the last ones standing during the fight in the Ministry. It might not have been much, but it was just enough to make her wonder if perhaps he was privy to more information than he was letting on.
She was about to question him further on the subject when a hush suddenly fell over the assembled group. Professor McGonagall had appeared in the portrait hole.
"Students who are going home for Christmas, please collect yourselves and line up in the hallway," she said. "We will be leaving momentarily."
And with that, the room erupted into a cacophony of noise as students hugged one another goodbye and pulled on their assorted hats, gloves, and woolen cloaks. A few ran upstairs to gather near-forgotten items and Ginny was one of them, as it occurred to her that she had left the bag containing Christmas gifts for her brothers under her bed.
Arriving back in the hallway just in time to meet up with the group of fifty or so Gryffindors who were leaving, the trip to Hogsmeade and aboard the Hogwarts Express seemed shorter than usual.
The train ride home, however, felt interminable and even Ron couldn't quite raise her spirits. They spoke briefly about the dance and she was finally able to ascertain, in the vaguest terms, that he hadn't actually physically harmed Harry at any point and that he still had no idea what had happened. Evidently, before retiring for the evening, they had formed a tenuous truce contingent on Harry apologizing to Ginny for whatever it was he had done the following morning. Ron expressed regret that Harry hadn't been able to fulfill his part of the bargain, but Ginny waved her brother off, saying that she'd see him soon enough. Their conversation gradually petered out after that and she leaned back to gaze out the window as they sat together in relative silence.
She reckoned, from the distant expression on Ron's face, that he was missing Hermione already and that didn't bode well for their upcoming holiday because she felt the same way about Harry. As much as she loved her family, she found herself increasingly annoyed that her mother had insisted that they come home for Christmas this year -- especially because she had allowed Ron and the twins to stay back at Hogwarts over the holidays several times before.
It wasn't until she stepped off the train at King's Cross and spotted Bill, Charlie and (sweet Merlin) Percy , that it all made sense. The sight of her three oldest brothers lifted her out of her melancholy mood like nothing else could. All but sprinting the distance between them, she leapt into Bill's arms, causing him to stumble back a few paces, laughing.
After smothering him with kisses, she did the same with Charlie and, throwing all caution aside, subjected Percy to an identical greeting. She wasn't sure why, but when he failed to push her away or make annoyed sounds like she fully expected him to, it made her want to hold on forever.
When she finally did pull away, he stepped back and regarded her for a few moments. "You've grown," he said simply.
"You too," she whispered and he smiled at her weakly. Out of all of her siblings, Percy was perhaps the biggest enigma because, despite his straight-laced persona, he had been the one to rebel most from the Weasley mold. Standing there in the middle of the train station, studying the awkwardly earnest look on his face, Ginny was struck with the realization that this was the first time she felt she truly understood him. He had made a mistake and despite the fact that she knew he'd never admit it aloud, she also knew his presence at home for the holidays was a form of apology in itself.
Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Ron clearing his throat and she moved aside to allow him the opportunity to greet Percy, which turned out to be a decidedly more reserved affair. However, she refused to allow her enthusiasm to be dampened. Watching Bill struggle with their luggage, she rushed over to help him and was all but brimming with excitement when they finally collected their things and made their way home.
After being subjected to another whirlwind round of greetings from her parents and the twins (who Ginny noted were altogether steering clear of Percy), she managed to escape to the solitude of her room and was relieved to finally drop her trunk to the floor and shrug out of her travel clothing.
Pulling on more comfortable robes, she realized, with a pang, that the only thing missing to make her life perfect was Harry. Being at home with her parents and brothers always seemed to make her think of him and she reckoned it was because they were the closest thing he had to a proper family. Hoping against all odds that her mother would be able to convince Dumbledore to let him visit, she flopped onto her back and stared up at the ceiling where Maeven was flying in excited, exploratory circles overhead. Letting her thoughts trail back over the events of the past few days, she laughed in silent amazement at how it continued to feel surreal. She still had difficulty focusing on what it had felt like to kiss him; on the other hand, the teasing, giddy laughter they had shared was so vivid it felt almost tangible and she found it incredibly entertaining to review those moments in her mind.
Rolling to her side, she let her fingers trail invisible patterns on her bed spread as she thought about how handsome he'd looked in his dress robes and how sweet he'd been in those painfully awkward moments, sitting on his bed, when both of them had been at a loss for words. Even now, she longed to hear the sound of his voice.
Closing her eyes, she was surprised to feel herself filled with an ache for him that was leagues more painful than anything she'd felt before last night.
Maeven alighted in front of her then, and Ginny gently stroked her sleek feathers, able to feel the bird's heartbeat jumping wildly from the exertion of her recent flight.
Idly, Ginny wondered if Hermione had managed to find him and was keeping him company. She wondered what he was doing just then and if whatever Dumbledore had wanted to ask him about was serious.
She wondered if he was thinking about her the same way she was thinking about him.
~*~
Christmas Day dawned cold and overcast, but that was fairly typical for England at this time of year. What surprised Ginny was that the ground still lay frozen and naked, especially when the sky was covered in thick, white clouds and she could all but smell the sharp scent of snow in the air.
The past four days spent at home had been relatively uneventful. Her father, Charlie, Percy, Ron, and the twins helped to decorate The Burrow while she, Bill, and her mother baked what ultimately looked like enough food to feed half of Hogwarts.
Dumbledore's owl lending permission for Harry and Hermione to join them had arrived very late at night, so Ginny hadn't found out about their impending arrival until she awoke that morning. Part of her was glad for it. She had lost enough sleep these past few weeks as was.
Since the tradition of opening presents had been postponed until after their guests had arrived, she found herself wandering listlessly around the kitchen, rearranging the last of the goodies her mother had produced into neat groups. Sneaking a ginger snap from the pile of cookies on the table, she just barely managed to duck out of Bill's way as he playfully made to snatch it back. The mock chase that ensued was abruptly cut short when a sound oddly reminiscent of an explosion burst forth from outside.
Ginny ran for the kitchen window at roughly the same time Ron ran for the front door. Vaguely worried at what she was going to find, she instantly sighed in relief when she recognized the battered Knight Bus moments before it disappeared.
Their guests had arrived.
"Hello there!" she heard her brother shout jubilantly as she watched him race down the path in the bitter cold dressed only in his jumper and a pair of slacks. She smiled to herself when Hermione's frizzy hair came into view and Ron all but tripped over himself to help her with her bags.
Her smile faded somewhat as she saw them start tugging back and forth over the items in question and although they were too far down the path to be heard, Ginny thought they looked like they were arguing with one another. This general behavior continued long enough for the twins to start catcalling at the pair from the front door and that in turn caused Hermione to look up, realize that she had an audience, and abruptly release one of the bags, sending Ron sprawling.
Ginny let out a long, slow breath that momentarily fogged up the window then because Ron's tumble and Hermione's horrified dive to help him gather up the assorted packages that had rolled out around them finally allowed a third figure to emerge into her line of vision.
Standing a few feet back, Harry stared at his two best friends with an exasperated look on his face but made no move to assist them in their frantic activity. His eyes lifted momentarily to the house and their gazes locked, causing a shock of happiness to fly through her. Lifting a hand against the glass in greeting she was pleased when he weakly returned the gesture but Ginny's father, who had finally made his way outdoors, interrupted the moment.
Hauling his son to his feet, he flicked his wand twice to gain control of both Harry and Hermione's things before unceremoniously ushering the three teenagers ahead of him into the house.
Ginny turned and wandered silently to the threshold of the kitchen door to watch as her mother rushed over to greet the new arrivals with an appropriate amount of maternal fuss. This particular activity went on for several minutes before her father quietly intervened and sent the pair upstairs to get themselves settled while the rest of the family waited in the living room.
Somewhat disappointed that she hadn't been able to properly greet either of them during the frenetic pace of their arrival, she consoled herself with the thought that she wouldn't have been able to say much anyway, especially because Ron and Hermione fully expected her to still be angry with Harry. The thought of what was really going on almost made her start laughing when he walked back into the room, but she caught Ron's eye and sobered up immediately.
"Well, Merry Christmas, all," Ginny's father said pleasantly. "Glad you're with us again this year, Harry and Hermione." He looked about to say something else but the twins made a noise as though they were ready to burst and, given past experience, Ginny wasn't sure they weren't. Unsurprisingly, her father relented. "Very well then, let's get started."
The words were no sooner out of his mouth than a collective motion rocked the furniture so violently that Ginny almost thought she saw the floor heave in response as Ron, Charlie and the twins lunged for the pile of gifts on the floor. Bill managed to exercise marginally more restraint in the beginning, as he only leaned forward to pick presents out of the fray at random, but some ribbing from Charlie quickly dragged him in to the general hysteria.
Watching them scramble on the floor, Ginny was pleased with herself for having had the presence of mind to sneak downstairs a few nights earlier and separate her own presents from the cluster below the tree. She leaned over the side of the sofa to retrieve them from where they were stashed.
Hermione watched the destruction taking place on floor with a vaguely frightened look on her face and, noticing, Ron helpfully started tossing her a few packages with her name on them. He started doing the same for Harry when his subdued demeanor made it clear that he also had no intention of joining in on the mayhem.
Resolving to arrange for apologies as soon as things quieted down a bit, Ginny busied herself with opening the assorted packages she'd received from her brothers.
"Blimey, Hermione, this is the best gift, ever!" Ron crowed as he held up a Chudley Canons poster that Ginny knew for a fact he already had two copies of.
"Are you sure, Ron?" she asked in an uncertain voice. "There were just so many and I wasn't sure which one you'd like."
"No, this is fantastic."
She smiled.
"So much better than that ruddy homework planner from last year," he continued breathlessly and Ginny felt her spirits lift when Harry made a coughing noise to cover what had initially sounded like a bark of laughter.
Opening up Bill's gift she was thrilled to find a pair of thin gold bracelets engraved with hieroglyphics. It was the first time any of her brothers had bought her jewelry as a gift and she smiled over at him appreciatively. "They're wonderful, Bill, thank you," she called. "You're going to have to tell me what they say, though."
He paused to nod at her cheerfully before returning to where he was holding Charlie down in a headlock and trying to extricate a dark blue package from him.
"Hey Gin," Ron shouted and she looked up. "Catch!"
Holding her arms out just in time, she was suddenly struck by two medium- sized packages that her brother flung from across the room.
"Harry and Hermione brought them," he yelled.
Stealing a glance at the dark haired boy in question, Ginny saw that he and Hermione were busy tearing into their gifts from Ron. The look on Hermione's face when they simultaneously pulled out matching Chudley Cannons jerseys was almost too much and she quickly concentrated on forcing her trembling fingers to unwrap the packages in her lap.
The first turned out to be a gorgeous hard covered book entitled Unblockable: Quidditch's Finest Chasers which she immediately guessed was from Harry. Opening the inside cover and seeing 'Happy Christmas' in his familiar scrawl confirmed her suspicions. Forcing herself not to hug the book to her chest in pleasure as she so desperately wanted to, she gingerly placed it next to her and unwrapped Hermione's gift, which turned out to be an elegant miniature stand with a plush silver cushion on top. A bit perplexed by this particular present, she shrugged and was about to thank her friend anyway when something about the sight of it tugged at her brain. Regarding it carefully, she abruptly tapped it with her wand and whispered, "Finite Incantatem."
Maeven let out a surprised chime as the stand suddenly sprung three times larger than it had been before and Ginny almost lost her grip on the delicate structure. Trembling a bit under the weight of it, she carefully put it down on the floor near the sofa and smiled.
"I believe that this is for you," Ginny said softly. Not needing much more encouragement, Maeven all but collapsed on the cushion, rolled on to her back, and spread her wings languidly under herself before kicking her feet up in the air in a decidedly unbird-like manner.
Ginny laughed at her phoenix's display because she knew how sorely Maeven had wanted something like this. This perch was almost as nice as the one that Dumbledore had for Fawkes and she was incredibly grateful for Hermione's thoughtfulness. She wished she had been able to provide her bird with something like this herself, but, as phoenixes were rare Familiars, perches such as these were equally rare and very, very expensive. The cage had been a temporary solution to the problem of where to house Maeven and it was normally left open, except for recently when her phoenix's early life cycle made Ginny worry that she might hurt herself if left unrestrained and unattended.
There was a sudden puff of green smoke from the left side of the room and Percy let out a startled yelp before shrieking and running in to the kitchen. For a split second, Ginny thought it looked as though his skin was turning blue. Her mother shot out of her seat just a beat behind the twins who leapt off the floor and up the stairs. So great was their rush to escape that they almost slammed in to Ginny's father as he hurried over to attend to Percy.
With such a mass exodus, the noise in the room dropped to only a fraction of the level it had been at before and could mostly be attributed to Charlie and Bill, who were still struggling over the blue present on the floor.
Ginny watched in amusement, about to ask what was in the package when she glanced over their battling figures and saw Ron nudging Harry while inclining his head in her direction. A look of intense reluctance on his face, Harry appeared even more depressed when he realized she'd been watching and this confused her.
Even though she knew it was ridiculous, she felt mildly annoyed that he was so unwilling to go through the motions of an apology in front of his friends after he had dispatched with the real thing in private. It wasn't as though he didn't know what she was going to say.
Stepping carefully around Charlie and Bill, Harry made his way across the room and settled into the seat next to her. Ginny shifted aside slightly to allow him more space. Darting him a glance under half-lidded eyes, she leaned back and took a deep breath, trying to look appropriately upset. There was another prolonged silence during which she listened to the rhythmic sound of his breathing and waited for him to speak.
"Ginny," he murmured, and she knew she was in trouble right from the start as the rich timbre of his voice had already set her heart pounding. "I'm.I'm sorry. About everything."
"It's all right, Harry," she said gently, trying to control the smile that threatened to break over her features.
He sighed then. "No, it's not."
"Yes, it is."
There was a long moment of silence.
"You have every reason to be angry with me," he said seriously.
She took a moment then to admire his incredible emotional control. If nothing else, Harry certainly was convincing. "But I'm not mad at you any more."
"Well, you should be."
She paused again and glanced at him this time, the smile that had been tugging at her lips fading. "What do you mean? We were both at fault, Harry."
"No, we weren't."
Her brows furrowed in confusion. "But.but I lost my temper, too."
"It was wrong of me.what happened--" he closed his eyes "--and I shouldn't have.I shouldn't have done what I did. I hope you can forgive me."
She stared at him but he refused to meet her eyes. It occurred to her then that there was nothing funny about this strange dance they were doing, this predicament that they had found themselves in. She felt her self-confidence vanish as she began to worry that he might not be apologizing for what she had initially thought.
"Harry, what do you mean?"
"I mean I made a mistake that night and said things I shouldn't have. I did things I shouldn't have. I'm sorry, Gin, I really am and.and I'm hoping we can still be.well, I'm hoping we can still be friends." His voice trembled slightly on the last word and before she could respond, he lowered his voice so only she could hear. "Please don't hate me, Ginny."
Her breath caught in her throat.
He had such an utterly mournful look on his face that she dropped her gaze to the floor .
"Oh," she whispered.
The fact was that she had been caught unprepared. For the entirety of their relationship, she had viewed their interactions with almost the same strategic sensibilities she approached a game of chess. He was guarded and often prickly so she always braced herself for the worst no matter what the situation. Unfortunately, she hadn't done so this time.
She had never, not even once, paused to contemplate the horrifying possibility that in the days since she had left him, Harry Potter might have changed his mind.
He abruptly turned towards her then and a sudden spurt of fear caused her to divert her gaze away from him. She fought to overcome the bitter sensation that something was slipping through her fingers at an alarming rate and she just didn't have the energy to stop it. The heat of his eyes on her face caused the hairs on the nape of her neck to stand on end.
"Ginny." he began imploringly, and she flinched at the sound of his voice saying her name.
"Aw, come on, Gin," Ron suddenly burst, clearly having eavesdropped on most of the conversation. "He's making an effort, isn't he? Can't you just forgive him?"
Because she knew that Ron had no idea what was going on, she chose to ignore him and simply concentrated on what she was going to do next. Gripping the cushion she was sitting on with almost painful ferocity, she finally settled on words over actions and decided to utter the only truth that came to mind. The only thing that was not swimming in the anger, or the hurt, or the disbelief currently assaulting her senses.
Tipping her head up defiantly, she forced herself to look him in the eye. "I could never hate you, Harry," she said, her voice surprisingly strong. "You know that."
And, with nothing left to give, she simply patted his arm and slowly got to her feet before making her way upstairs to her room.
She didn't return for a very long time.
~*~
End Part 11
A/N: I listen to music when I write and exclusively listened to 'The Scientist' by Coldplay for this part (when all else fails, blame it on the band.). It's worth checking out if you haven't already-especially if you're really interested in thoroughly depressing yourself while reading this part. It actually fits part 10 better than 11, which is a strange coincidence (realize I am restraining myself from making a pun on my pen name here).
Also, some housekeeping stuff: The good news is that no, I am not leaving things this way. In fact, sections of the next few chapters have already been written. The bad news is that I start law school this Monday-lucky me. Expect updates to be fewer and farther between (sorry).
A/N2: Just to clarify a point that appears to be causing much confusion: In American terms, Ginny removed her robe while with Harry-not her nightgown. There was absolutely no nudity and certainly no shagging in the previous chapter-at least as far as I know. ;)
Chapter 11: Grey
She was drifting.
Drifting in a sea of warmth and colors and softness that flowed over her body and enveloped her senses. Snatches of memories slipped through every so often and she caught glimpses of things she hadn't noticed the first time around. The drugged look in his dark green eyes between kisses, the initial moment when his hand had tightened reflexively on her thigh, the soft sound he'd made when he'd broken away from her.it was all there, buried deep in the recesses of her subconscious.
She could almost feel him, even now, as he ran his fingers through her hair. The gentle tugging sensation it had caused gradually became so real that, for one brief moment on the edge between sleep and wakefulness, Ginny wondered if Harry had finally found a way to come to her.
That's when her eyes flew open and she sat up with a start.
Maeven dropped the piece of hair she had been holding in her beak and fluttered around excitedly, chiming. Ginny fell backwards onto her pillow in disappointment.
Hazarding a glance at her clock, she was horrified to realize that she had less than half an hour to meet her brother to go to the train station and she hadn't quite finished packing. Sleep had only begun to tug at her eyes minutes before she was scheduled to wake up and, despite her efforts not to, she had succumbed to it. Half sliding, half tumbling out of bed, she darted for the loo, shrugging off the last remnants of her dream in her all- encompassing panic to get downstairs.
Running back in to the room a few minutes later, she saw some of the house elves hauling the last of her dormitory mates' luggage out the door. A bit worried about her own disorganized state, she muttered a few haphazard spells, and split her attention between the items dancing into her trunk behind her back and her appearance in the mirror in front of her. Though she had never been one to expend a large amount effort on the way she looked, she was nevertheless cursing herself for having overslept, as she really would have liked a few extra minutes to prepare this morning.
Pulling a brush through her hair, she was dismayed to find it more tangled and uncooperative than usual. Since she didn't have time to plait it, she reckoned she'd have tie it up in a ponytail if she wanted to make an attempt at looking half-way decent. Maeven started chiming rather desperately then and Ginny's eyes flickered to the reflection of the bird behind her. Somehow, in her general enthusiasm to be helpful, her Familiar had managed to get caught inside the suitcase and was getting cheerfully buried under Ginny's dancing clothes.
The brush still caught in her hair, she quickly sped over, extracted the phoenix, and took the opportunity to grab a skirt, shirt, and some robes to wear. The act of dressing was what ultimately calmed her down as it didn't take very long and allowed her to fully appreciate how completely stupid she was being.
There was a reason why she disliked the general hysteria many of the other girls flung themselves into when they fancied a boy. Preparing for something as mundane as dinner would quickly become a chore and Ginny reckoned that if she could resist succumbing to that level of insanity for Michael, she could do the same for Harry. She was also convinced that Harry would simply die of embarrassment if he knew she was expending any effort on looking nice for him when she really should be concentrating on packing.
And so, yanking the brush through her hair, she abandoned the mirror entirely in favor of getting the last of her things in her trunk in time to be taken to the train. Mission accomplished, she was so busy congratulating herself on being sensible that she was able to pause and put on a bit of extra lip-gloss without having it weigh significantly on her conscience.
Maeven politely ignored this questionable behavior and flew obediently after Ginny as she hurriedly made her way down the stairs.
Upon entering the Common Room, the first thing she saw was Dean Thomas talking excitedly with Katie Bell next to the Portrait Hole. He was still dressed in his pajamas while she was pulling on her scarf. Doing a quick visual sweep for Harry, Ginny was exceedingly disappointed to realize that he didn't appear to be there yet. The only other students present consisted of a few fourth years playing exploding snap near the fire and Ron and Hermione sitting side by side engrossed in a book. Well, Hermione was dutifully reading the book and saying something while Ron was dutifully staring at her profile.
She wondered idly what would happen if she tried to skirt past Hermione and up to the boys' dormitory to look for Harry when she noticed that one of the fourth years was staring at her. Rather indiscreetly, he nudged one of his friends and before long the whole group was alternately glancing in her direction and whispering in subdued tones.
Momentarily confused, Ginny frowned at them before she was struck by something that hadn't, until that point, occurred to her.
No one knew.
Biting her lip, Ginny realized that a large number of students had seen the fall out from the fight and had heard Ron shouting at Harry for making her cry, but no one, her brother included, was privy to what had happened afterwards.
With an almost tangible sadness, she realized that every lovely scenario she had envisioned of running across the room and throwing herself into Harry's arms as soon as she laid eyes on him was no longer an option. Not unless she wanted to raise unending questions regarding her change of behavior and risk admitting that she'd visited his room late at night. Ginny wasn't quite sure she cared what people thought of the fact that she'd gone to see him as her intentions, at least initially, had been completely noble. She'd gone there to pound him senseless for being an idiot. What had happened thereafter.well, that wasn't entirely her fault. Neither was it anyone's business.
Unfortunately, no matter how much sense that reasoning made to Ginny, she knew with near certainty that Harry would loathe the intrusive questions they would be subjected to and that was something she definitely cared about.
Deciding that the best course of action would be to reign in her enthusiasm for the time being, Ginny felt the most normal thing to do while waiting for Harry to come down would be to join her brother. Before she could begin to make her way over, however, Ron saw her standing there and leapt to his feet, leaving Hermione in mid-sentence.
Walking up, he wordlessly put an arm around her shoulders, pulled her forward and planted a hard kiss on her forehead. Surprised, she smiled into his robes in response. Ever since he'd started Hogwarts, Ron had made it clear that he wasn't one for public displays of affection. This change hadn't been particularly unexpected as the twins had done the same thing, but it had been a difficult adjustment for her as they had been closest in age and had been closest growing up.
"You all right?" he asked gruffly as he pulled away.
"Yes, thanks."
Nodding briskly, he removed his arm from her shoulders and grinned. "I don't choose sides, you know."
As he had been exceptionally kind to her these past two days, she decided not to argue. "I know, Ron. I know."
There was a significant pause.
"I don't think he's coming, so don't worry," he whispered suddenly.
"Who?" Ginny asked.
"Harry."
"What?" Her heart sank.
Ron shrugged casually, but it came out looking forced. "Dobby came in to our room early this morning and woke him up. Said Dumbledore wanted to see him."
"What?!" Ginny moaned. "Wait- is everything all right?"
A worried look briefly flitted across his features. "I reckon as much.I mean, he hasn't left Hogwarts so he should be fine."
"But do you know for sure, Ron?" Ginny asked.
He paused. "No, but Hermione is staying here. She said she'll check up on him as soon as she sees us off." He gave her a vaguely suspicious look. "I thought you didn't want to talk to him anyway."
"Well, yes," she stammered, "I didn't, but that was last night. I was hoping to straighten things out with him before we left."
"Ah, well, Mum said she'd owl Dumbledore and see if she can convince him to let Harry join us for Christmas Day, so you might get your chance then."
"Oh." She tried to mask the defeated look that threatened to break over her face but realized it wasn't necessary because Ron had stopped paying attention. Following his gaze, she noted that Hermione was smiling and waving them over, patting the two empty spaces on either side of her. As Ginny followed her brother over, a hand suddenly shot out and grabbed the sleeve of her robes. Spinning around, she was a bit startled to find herself looking down at Neville, who was seated alone on a sofa.
"Hi Gin," he said solemnly. "How are you?"
"Fine, Neville," she responded, concerned. "Are you all right? Did something happen with Luna?"
His face shifted momentarily from sadness to confusion. "Luna? No."
"Then what happened?"
His brow furrowed. "That's what I was going to ask you."
"What?"
He pulled her down closer as though telling a secret. "Listen Ginny, I-I heard about you and Harry and.if you want to talk about it...." he trailed off awkwardly.
Unsure of what to say, she moved to take a seat next to him. Keeping this a secret - even temporarily - wasn't going to be nearly as easy as she'd thought and she felt bad lying to poor Neville. Especially when he looked so devastated on her behalf. Unfortunately, as close as they were, the notion of admitting to him that she had snogged Harry last night was so far beyond the realm of reality in her mind that she had no choice but to find another way to assuage his misery.
Settling down with a heavy sigh, she tried to think of what she could offer him by way of the truth without getting too.graphic. "I don't know how to explain it, Neville. Sometimes Harry just.he just acts a bit strange is all. We both overreacted last night, but it's over now."
"Did he try to hurt you?" Neville asked suddenly, causing Ginny to almost choke.
"What?"
"I heard he was chasing you and Ron stopped him. Did he try to hurt you, Gin?"
She paused, stunned. "No, of course he didn't."
"You'd tell me if he did, wouldn't you? Because...if he did, I'd-I'd do something about it." He was eyeing her carefully and despite her shock over his accusations, she couldn't help but feel touched. When Ron was overprotective it only served to irritate her, but with Neville, it was different. Perhaps it was because she knew how contrary it was to his nature to act this way. It wasn't that he lacked bravery -- he was a Gryffindor after all -- but Neville just plain disliked fighting. This was a quality she deeply respected in him, even though she didn't share it herself. Ginny knew beyond a doubt that if their positions were reversed, and she felt he had been wronged, she wouldn't have thought twice about hexing the other party into next week.
Curling up against him, she smiled and hugged his arm. "I'd tell you if he did, I promise." She had expected him to squirm away in response to her touch, but when he didn't she laid her head comfortingly on his shoulder. "We just had a fight is all and he was trying to apologize and I was too angry to hear him."
"All right, then." Neville responded, staring at the fire. After a few moments of silence, he took a deep breath. "You know, Ginny, Harry's great.usually..I don't know why he acts the way he does sometimes. I-I really don't think he means to.do what he does, Ginny. I mean, he really does..value your opinion on..on..things.."
She pulled away from him then, her eyes narrowing slightly.
Clearly responding to the suspicious look she was giving him, Neville's eyes widened. "I'm just guessing, is all, from-from what I've heard. I mean- seen."
It was with an emotion torn slightly between horror and endless amusement that Ginny realized she had never stopped to really think about Neville's relationship to anyone but Luna and herself. She had simply assumed that all three of them had been forsaken by the Three Musketeers at the start of the year and that, due to the fact Ron was her brother, she was the closest bridge between the two groups.
However, Neville was a year older than she and Luna so he spent much more time with Ron, Hermione and Harry by virtue of their classes alone. Neville and Harry had also shared the experience of being the last ones standing during the fight in the Ministry. It might not have been much, but it was just enough to make her wonder if perhaps he was privy to more information than he was letting on.
She was about to question him further on the subject when a hush suddenly fell over the assembled group. Professor McGonagall had appeared in the portrait hole.
"Students who are going home for Christmas, please collect yourselves and line up in the hallway," she said. "We will be leaving momentarily."
And with that, the room erupted into a cacophony of noise as students hugged one another goodbye and pulled on their assorted hats, gloves, and woolen cloaks. A few ran upstairs to gather near-forgotten items and Ginny was one of them, as it occurred to her that she had left the bag containing Christmas gifts for her brothers under her bed.
Arriving back in the hallway just in time to meet up with the group of fifty or so Gryffindors who were leaving, the trip to Hogsmeade and aboard the Hogwarts Express seemed shorter than usual.
The train ride home, however, felt interminable and even Ron couldn't quite raise her spirits. They spoke briefly about the dance and she was finally able to ascertain, in the vaguest terms, that he hadn't actually physically harmed Harry at any point and that he still had no idea what had happened. Evidently, before retiring for the evening, they had formed a tenuous truce contingent on Harry apologizing to Ginny for whatever it was he had done the following morning. Ron expressed regret that Harry hadn't been able to fulfill his part of the bargain, but Ginny waved her brother off, saying that she'd see him soon enough. Their conversation gradually petered out after that and she leaned back to gaze out the window as they sat together in relative silence.
She reckoned, from the distant expression on Ron's face, that he was missing Hermione already and that didn't bode well for their upcoming holiday because she felt the same way about Harry. As much as she loved her family, she found herself increasingly annoyed that her mother had insisted that they come home for Christmas this year -- especially because she had allowed Ron and the twins to stay back at Hogwarts over the holidays several times before.
It wasn't until she stepped off the train at King's Cross and spotted Bill, Charlie and (sweet Merlin) Percy , that it all made sense. The sight of her three oldest brothers lifted her out of her melancholy mood like nothing else could. All but sprinting the distance between them, she leapt into Bill's arms, causing him to stumble back a few paces, laughing.
After smothering him with kisses, she did the same with Charlie and, throwing all caution aside, subjected Percy to an identical greeting. She wasn't sure why, but when he failed to push her away or make annoyed sounds like she fully expected him to, it made her want to hold on forever.
When she finally did pull away, he stepped back and regarded her for a few moments. "You've grown," he said simply.
"You too," she whispered and he smiled at her weakly. Out of all of her siblings, Percy was perhaps the biggest enigma because, despite his straight-laced persona, he had been the one to rebel most from the Weasley mold. Standing there in the middle of the train station, studying the awkwardly earnest look on his face, Ginny was struck with the realization that this was the first time she felt she truly understood him. He had made a mistake and despite the fact that she knew he'd never admit it aloud, she also knew his presence at home for the holidays was a form of apology in itself.
Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Ron clearing his throat and she moved aside to allow him the opportunity to greet Percy, which turned out to be a decidedly more reserved affair. However, she refused to allow her enthusiasm to be dampened. Watching Bill struggle with their luggage, she rushed over to help him and was all but brimming with excitement when they finally collected their things and made their way home.
After being subjected to another whirlwind round of greetings from her parents and the twins (who Ginny noted were altogether steering clear of Percy), she managed to escape to the solitude of her room and was relieved to finally drop her trunk to the floor and shrug out of her travel clothing.
Pulling on more comfortable robes, she realized, with a pang, that the only thing missing to make her life perfect was Harry. Being at home with her parents and brothers always seemed to make her think of him and she reckoned it was because they were the closest thing he had to a proper family. Hoping against all odds that her mother would be able to convince Dumbledore to let him visit, she flopped onto her back and stared up at the ceiling where Maeven was flying in excited, exploratory circles overhead. Letting her thoughts trail back over the events of the past few days, she laughed in silent amazement at how it continued to feel surreal. She still had difficulty focusing on what it had felt like to kiss him; on the other hand, the teasing, giddy laughter they had shared was so vivid it felt almost tangible and she found it incredibly entertaining to review those moments in her mind.
Rolling to her side, she let her fingers trail invisible patterns on her bed spread as she thought about how handsome he'd looked in his dress robes and how sweet he'd been in those painfully awkward moments, sitting on his bed, when both of them had been at a loss for words. Even now, she longed to hear the sound of his voice.
Closing her eyes, she was surprised to feel herself filled with an ache for him that was leagues more painful than anything she'd felt before last night.
Maeven alighted in front of her then, and Ginny gently stroked her sleek feathers, able to feel the bird's heartbeat jumping wildly from the exertion of her recent flight.
Idly, Ginny wondered if Hermione had managed to find him and was keeping him company. She wondered what he was doing just then and if whatever Dumbledore had wanted to ask him about was serious.
She wondered if he was thinking about her the same way she was thinking about him.
~*~
Christmas Day dawned cold and overcast, but that was fairly typical for England at this time of year. What surprised Ginny was that the ground still lay frozen and naked, especially when the sky was covered in thick, white clouds and she could all but smell the sharp scent of snow in the air.
The past four days spent at home had been relatively uneventful. Her father, Charlie, Percy, Ron, and the twins helped to decorate The Burrow while she, Bill, and her mother baked what ultimately looked like enough food to feed half of Hogwarts.
Dumbledore's owl lending permission for Harry and Hermione to join them had arrived very late at night, so Ginny hadn't found out about their impending arrival until she awoke that morning. Part of her was glad for it. She had lost enough sleep these past few weeks as was.
Since the tradition of opening presents had been postponed until after their guests had arrived, she found herself wandering listlessly around the kitchen, rearranging the last of the goodies her mother had produced into neat groups. Sneaking a ginger snap from the pile of cookies on the table, she just barely managed to duck out of Bill's way as he playfully made to snatch it back. The mock chase that ensued was abruptly cut short when a sound oddly reminiscent of an explosion burst forth from outside.
Ginny ran for the kitchen window at roughly the same time Ron ran for the front door. Vaguely worried at what she was going to find, she instantly sighed in relief when she recognized the battered Knight Bus moments before it disappeared.
Their guests had arrived.
"Hello there!" she heard her brother shout jubilantly as she watched him race down the path in the bitter cold dressed only in his jumper and a pair of slacks. She smiled to herself when Hermione's frizzy hair came into view and Ron all but tripped over himself to help her with her bags.
Her smile faded somewhat as she saw them start tugging back and forth over the items in question and although they were too far down the path to be heard, Ginny thought they looked like they were arguing with one another. This general behavior continued long enough for the twins to start catcalling at the pair from the front door and that in turn caused Hermione to look up, realize that she had an audience, and abruptly release one of the bags, sending Ron sprawling.
Ginny let out a long, slow breath that momentarily fogged up the window then because Ron's tumble and Hermione's horrified dive to help him gather up the assorted packages that had rolled out around them finally allowed a third figure to emerge into her line of vision.
Standing a few feet back, Harry stared at his two best friends with an exasperated look on his face but made no move to assist them in their frantic activity. His eyes lifted momentarily to the house and their gazes locked, causing a shock of happiness to fly through her. Lifting a hand against the glass in greeting she was pleased when he weakly returned the gesture but Ginny's father, who had finally made his way outdoors, interrupted the moment.
Hauling his son to his feet, he flicked his wand twice to gain control of both Harry and Hermione's things before unceremoniously ushering the three teenagers ahead of him into the house.
Ginny turned and wandered silently to the threshold of the kitchen door to watch as her mother rushed over to greet the new arrivals with an appropriate amount of maternal fuss. This particular activity went on for several minutes before her father quietly intervened and sent the pair upstairs to get themselves settled while the rest of the family waited in the living room.
Somewhat disappointed that she hadn't been able to properly greet either of them during the frenetic pace of their arrival, she consoled herself with the thought that she wouldn't have been able to say much anyway, especially because Ron and Hermione fully expected her to still be angry with Harry. The thought of what was really going on almost made her start laughing when he walked back into the room, but she caught Ron's eye and sobered up immediately.
"Well, Merry Christmas, all," Ginny's father said pleasantly. "Glad you're with us again this year, Harry and Hermione." He looked about to say something else but the twins made a noise as though they were ready to burst and, given past experience, Ginny wasn't sure they weren't. Unsurprisingly, her father relented. "Very well then, let's get started."
The words were no sooner out of his mouth than a collective motion rocked the furniture so violently that Ginny almost thought she saw the floor heave in response as Ron, Charlie and the twins lunged for the pile of gifts on the floor. Bill managed to exercise marginally more restraint in the beginning, as he only leaned forward to pick presents out of the fray at random, but some ribbing from Charlie quickly dragged him in to the general hysteria.
Watching them scramble on the floor, Ginny was pleased with herself for having had the presence of mind to sneak downstairs a few nights earlier and separate her own presents from the cluster below the tree. She leaned over the side of the sofa to retrieve them from where they were stashed.
Hermione watched the destruction taking place on floor with a vaguely frightened look on her face and, noticing, Ron helpfully started tossing her a few packages with her name on them. He started doing the same for Harry when his subdued demeanor made it clear that he also had no intention of joining in on the mayhem.
Resolving to arrange for apologies as soon as things quieted down a bit, Ginny busied herself with opening the assorted packages she'd received from her brothers.
"Blimey, Hermione, this is the best gift, ever!" Ron crowed as he held up a Chudley Canons poster that Ginny knew for a fact he already had two copies of.
"Are you sure, Ron?" she asked in an uncertain voice. "There were just so many and I wasn't sure which one you'd like."
"No, this is fantastic."
She smiled.
"So much better than that ruddy homework planner from last year," he continued breathlessly and Ginny felt her spirits lift when Harry made a coughing noise to cover what had initially sounded like a bark of laughter.
Opening up Bill's gift she was thrilled to find a pair of thin gold bracelets engraved with hieroglyphics. It was the first time any of her brothers had bought her jewelry as a gift and she smiled over at him appreciatively. "They're wonderful, Bill, thank you," she called. "You're going to have to tell me what they say, though."
He paused to nod at her cheerfully before returning to where he was holding Charlie down in a headlock and trying to extricate a dark blue package from him.
"Hey Gin," Ron shouted and she looked up. "Catch!"
Holding her arms out just in time, she was suddenly struck by two medium- sized packages that her brother flung from across the room.
"Harry and Hermione brought them," he yelled.
Stealing a glance at the dark haired boy in question, Ginny saw that he and Hermione were busy tearing into their gifts from Ron. The look on Hermione's face when they simultaneously pulled out matching Chudley Cannons jerseys was almost too much and she quickly concentrated on forcing her trembling fingers to unwrap the packages in her lap.
The first turned out to be a gorgeous hard covered book entitled Unblockable: Quidditch's Finest Chasers which she immediately guessed was from Harry. Opening the inside cover and seeing 'Happy Christmas' in his familiar scrawl confirmed her suspicions. Forcing herself not to hug the book to her chest in pleasure as she so desperately wanted to, she gingerly placed it next to her and unwrapped Hermione's gift, which turned out to be an elegant miniature stand with a plush silver cushion on top. A bit perplexed by this particular present, she shrugged and was about to thank her friend anyway when something about the sight of it tugged at her brain. Regarding it carefully, she abruptly tapped it with her wand and whispered, "Finite Incantatem."
Maeven let out a surprised chime as the stand suddenly sprung three times larger than it had been before and Ginny almost lost her grip on the delicate structure. Trembling a bit under the weight of it, she carefully put it down on the floor near the sofa and smiled.
"I believe that this is for you," Ginny said softly. Not needing much more encouragement, Maeven all but collapsed on the cushion, rolled on to her back, and spread her wings languidly under herself before kicking her feet up in the air in a decidedly unbird-like manner.
Ginny laughed at her phoenix's display because she knew how sorely Maeven had wanted something like this. This perch was almost as nice as the one that Dumbledore had for Fawkes and she was incredibly grateful for Hermione's thoughtfulness. She wished she had been able to provide her bird with something like this herself, but, as phoenixes were rare Familiars, perches such as these were equally rare and very, very expensive. The cage had been a temporary solution to the problem of where to house Maeven and it was normally left open, except for recently when her phoenix's early life cycle made Ginny worry that she might hurt herself if left unrestrained and unattended.
There was a sudden puff of green smoke from the left side of the room and Percy let out a startled yelp before shrieking and running in to the kitchen. For a split second, Ginny thought it looked as though his skin was turning blue. Her mother shot out of her seat just a beat behind the twins who leapt off the floor and up the stairs. So great was their rush to escape that they almost slammed in to Ginny's father as he hurried over to attend to Percy.
With such a mass exodus, the noise in the room dropped to only a fraction of the level it had been at before and could mostly be attributed to Charlie and Bill, who were still struggling over the blue present on the floor.
Ginny watched in amusement, about to ask what was in the package when she glanced over their battling figures and saw Ron nudging Harry while inclining his head in her direction. A look of intense reluctance on his face, Harry appeared even more depressed when he realized she'd been watching and this confused her.
Even though she knew it was ridiculous, she felt mildly annoyed that he was so unwilling to go through the motions of an apology in front of his friends after he had dispatched with the real thing in private. It wasn't as though he didn't know what she was going to say.
Stepping carefully around Charlie and Bill, Harry made his way across the room and settled into the seat next to her. Ginny shifted aside slightly to allow him more space. Darting him a glance under half-lidded eyes, she leaned back and took a deep breath, trying to look appropriately upset. There was another prolonged silence during which she listened to the rhythmic sound of his breathing and waited for him to speak.
"Ginny," he murmured, and she knew she was in trouble right from the start as the rich timbre of his voice had already set her heart pounding. "I'm.I'm sorry. About everything."
"It's all right, Harry," she said gently, trying to control the smile that threatened to break over her features.
He sighed then. "No, it's not."
"Yes, it is."
There was a long moment of silence.
"You have every reason to be angry with me," he said seriously.
She took a moment then to admire his incredible emotional control. If nothing else, Harry certainly was convincing. "But I'm not mad at you any more."
"Well, you should be."
She paused again and glanced at him this time, the smile that had been tugging at her lips fading. "What do you mean? We were both at fault, Harry."
"No, we weren't."
Her brows furrowed in confusion. "But.but I lost my temper, too."
"It was wrong of me.what happened--" he closed his eyes "--and I shouldn't have.I shouldn't have done what I did. I hope you can forgive me."
She stared at him but he refused to meet her eyes. It occurred to her then that there was nothing funny about this strange dance they were doing, this predicament that they had found themselves in. She felt her self-confidence vanish as she began to worry that he might not be apologizing for what she had initially thought.
"Harry, what do you mean?"
"I mean I made a mistake that night and said things I shouldn't have. I did things I shouldn't have. I'm sorry, Gin, I really am and.and I'm hoping we can still be.well, I'm hoping we can still be friends." His voice trembled slightly on the last word and before she could respond, he lowered his voice so only she could hear. "Please don't hate me, Ginny."
Her breath caught in her throat.
He had such an utterly mournful look on his face that she dropped her gaze to the floor .
"Oh," she whispered.
The fact was that she had been caught unprepared. For the entirety of their relationship, she had viewed their interactions with almost the same strategic sensibilities she approached a game of chess. He was guarded and often prickly so she always braced herself for the worst no matter what the situation. Unfortunately, she hadn't done so this time.
She had never, not even once, paused to contemplate the horrifying possibility that in the days since she had left him, Harry Potter might have changed his mind.
He abruptly turned towards her then and a sudden spurt of fear caused her to divert her gaze away from him. She fought to overcome the bitter sensation that something was slipping through her fingers at an alarming rate and she just didn't have the energy to stop it. The heat of his eyes on her face caused the hairs on the nape of her neck to stand on end.
"Ginny." he began imploringly, and she flinched at the sound of his voice saying her name.
"Aw, come on, Gin," Ron suddenly burst, clearly having eavesdropped on most of the conversation. "He's making an effort, isn't he? Can't you just forgive him?"
Because she knew that Ron had no idea what was going on, she chose to ignore him and simply concentrated on what she was going to do next. Gripping the cushion she was sitting on with almost painful ferocity, she finally settled on words over actions and decided to utter the only truth that came to mind. The only thing that was not swimming in the anger, or the hurt, or the disbelief currently assaulting her senses.
Tipping her head up defiantly, she forced herself to look him in the eye. "I could never hate you, Harry," she said, her voice surprisingly strong. "You know that."
And, with nothing left to give, she simply patted his arm and slowly got to her feet before making her way upstairs to her room.
She didn't return for a very long time.
~*~
End Part 11
A/N: I listen to music when I write and exclusively listened to 'The Scientist' by Coldplay for this part (when all else fails, blame it on the band.). It's worth checking out if you haven't already-especially if you're really interested in thoroughly depressing yourself while reading this part. It actually fits part 10 better than 11, which is a strange coincidence (realize I am restraining myself from making a pun on my pen name here).
Also, some housekeeping stuff: The good news is that no, I am not leaving things this way. In fact, sections of the next few chapters have already been written. The bad news is that I start law school this Monday-lucky me. Expect updates to be fewer and farther between (sorry).