Chapter Four: The End of Sobriety
"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!"
Sober Adder and Stoned Sturm had just been cornered by the tanks from last chapter, and Sober Adder, being the calm soul that he was, had taken to screaming like a girl and running all over the place. Stoned Sturm, on the other hand, looked positively calm, like he wasn't being cornered by killing machines. He smiled beneath the mask. "Time to attack again!"
The first tank came flying (metaphorically speaking) at him. He took one of his most valued cigarettes and threw it straight at the turret. Instantly the tank stopped moving, as the drivers started hacking and coughing, fighting to get out of the smokey tank.
Four more cigarettes later, and the battle was over. What? You were expecting something better?
- - - - -
Meanwhile, in Orange Star, the more living Sami was lying, recovering after an operation that almost killed her. But it was better than not having the operation and definitely dying. The doctor walked through with an air of 'I'm so much better than you, and DON'T YOU KNOW IT!!!' and swaggered to the side of her bed.
"Sami, the operation was a success. We've successfully removed the X- Parasite."
The infantry specialist smiled, before suddenly frowning. "But...doesn't that merit an act of war from the Metroid continent?"
The doctor, who had taken his Medical course in the Metroid continent, shook his head. "No, this is probably a loose X-Parasite. However, we couldn't kill it. It's still around, and it's mimicking you with its awesome cloney ability thingies!"
"Hmm...you have no idea what the word is, do you."
"Something like Mimesis...but yeah. Anyway, I have decided to name this clone the SAMI-X, because I can, and because you're gonna have to hunt it down. You can use this strange contraption that Lash gave us. She calls it a 'Laptop'. It has the entire map of Macro Land, and indeed all of VG World. Good luck Sami."
And with that, the doctor swaggered again, this time out of the surgery. There was a long silence, followed by a loud "FUUUUUUUUU-"
- - - - -
The author decided it was time to look at the reviews on But just as he was about to log on, he heard a cold, dark voice say "Human, where is the Orange Star HQ?" His head snapped round to see Sami. But it wasn't Sami, as her eyes were completely white, and Sami didn't refer to people as 'Human'. Yes, this was the SAMI-X! Time for a DRAMATIC MOMENT!!!
"DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!"
Thank you, SFX man.
"Don't mention it."
Anyway, the author, despite controlling the entire world, couldn't help the fact he was a dumbass. "Macro Land. We're headed there just now. Want to come with us?"
The SAMI-X nodded evilly. Unlike Stoned Hawke, or Sturm, who were evil, and bragged about it at evil clubs, the SAMI-X didn't need to brag. She had more of a Crab Vader evil about her. Evil radiated off her. She gave off the feeling that she could kill everyone in the Fangirl army in a matter of minutes. And she knew that, but she contented with killing the original Sami. But when pushed, she could control the world in half a minute. Of course, she still went to the evil clubs, and usually had to break a few necks of the boys who thought they stood a chance with her. But that was the bad thing about being an evil woman. The men take you for granted. She should join an evil union.
- - - - -
Meanwhile, at Crab Vader's lair in the Alara mountain range.
"Get lost, I ain't doing anything interesting!"
Oh, ok.
- - - - -
Stoned Sturm and Sober Adder were currently arguing about how to deal with that city that sent the tanks their way.
"I THINK WE SHOULD KILL THEM ALL!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Stoned Sturm exclaimed.
Sober Adder hit back with "It's the drugs! They make you violent! THE DRUGS DON'T WORK!!!"
Stoned Sturm froze. Sober Adder had insulted the drugs, and now there was only one fate that Sober Adder had now. Death.
"THE DRUGS DO WORK!!! DIE!!!"
There follows a horribly painful and bloody violence scene that, if I wrote, the fic would have to be bumped up to an R. Plus, it's not suitable for anyone. So you'll have to imagine. Let's just say the end involved Stoned Sturm ripping Sober Adder's head off.
"That'll teach him a lesson."
- - - - -
The author was currently staring out of the window of the private vehicle that he owned. Due to the fact it was his idea to take SAMI-X with him, she was forced to share the carriage with him. She was currently looking at the author in a menacing way. She had a sort of white-eyed, evil beauty, the author thought. But she was still evil.
"Err...so why are you going to the Orange Star Hospital?"
SAMI-X replied simply "To kill the original version of me."
"Ah. Right."
And the vehicle moved on to the Macro Land area.
- - - - -
REVIEW RESPONSES!!!
VM-You've been warned. But thanks for the favourite adding! WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
MotP-Yes, my disciple. Thank you for the nice review. DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN!!!
"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!"
Sober Adder and Stoned Sturm had just been cornered by the tanks from last chapter, and Sober Adder, being the calm soul that he was, had taken to screaming like a girl and running all over the place. Stoned Sturm, on the other hand, looked positively calm, like he wasn't being cornered by killing machines. He smiled beneath the mask. "Time to attack again!"
The first tank came flying (metaphorically speaking) at him. He took one of his most valued cigarettes and threw it straight at the turret. Instantly the tank stopped moving, as the drivers started hacking and coughing, fighting to get out of the smokey tank.
Four more cigarettes later, and the battle was over. What? You were expecting something better?
- - - - -
Meanwhile, in Orange Star, the more living Sami was lying, recovering after an operation that almost killed her. But it was better than not having the operation and definitely dying. The doctor walked through with an air of 'I'm so much better than you, and DON'T YOU KNOW IT!!!' and swaggered to the side of her bed.
"Sami, the operation was a success. We've successfully removed the X- Parasite."
The infantry specialist smiled, before suddenly frowning. "But...doesn't that merit an act of war from the Metroid continent?"
The doctor, who had taken his Medical course in the Metroid continent, shook his head. "No, this is probably a loose X-Parasite. However, we couldn't kill it. It's still around, and it's mimicking you with its awesome cloney ability thingies!"
"Hmm...you have no idea what the word is, do you."
"Something like Mimesis...but yeah. Anyway, I have decided to name this clone the SAMI-X, because I can, and because you're gonna have to hunt it down. You can use this strange contraption that Lash gave us. She calls it a 'Laptop'. It has the entire map of Macro Land, and indeed all of VG World. Good luck Sami."
And with that, the doctor swaggered again, this time out of the surgery. There was a long silence, followed by a loud "FUUUUUUUUU-"
- - - - -
The author decided it was time to look at the reviews on But just as he was about to log on, he heard a cold, dark voice say "Human, where is the Orange Star HQ?" His head snapped round to see Sami. But it wasn't Sami, as her eyes were completely white, and Sami didn't refer to people as 'Human'. Yes, this was the SAMI-X! Time for a DRAMATIC MOMENT!!!
"DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!"
Thank you, SFX man.
"Don't mention it."
Anyway, the author, despite controlling the entire world, couldn't help the fact he was a dumbass. "Macro Land. We're headed there just now. Want to come with us?"
The SAMI-X nodded evilly. Unlike Stoned Hawke, or Sturm, who were evil, and bragged about it at evil clubs, the SAMI-X didn't need to brag. She had more of a Crab Vader evil about her. Evil radiated off her. She gave off the feeling that she could kill everyone in the Fangirl army in a matter of minutes. And she knew that, but she contented with killing the original Sami. But when pushed, she could control the world in half a minute. Of course, she still went to the evil clubs, and usually had to break a few necks of the boys who thought they stood a chance with her. But that was the bad thing about being an evil woman. The men take you for granted. She should join an evil union.
- - - - -
Meanwhile, at Crab Vader's lair in the Alara mountain range.
"Get lost, I ain't doing anything interesting!"
Oh, ok.
- - - - -
Stoned Sturm and Sober Adder were currently arguing about how to deal with that city that sent the tanks their way.
"I THINK WE SHOULD KILL THEM ALL!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Stoned Sturm exclaimed.
Sober Adder hit back with "It's the drugs! They make you violent! THE DRUGS DON'T WORK!!!"
Stoned Sturm froze. Sober Adder had insulted the drugs, and now there was only one fate that Sober Adder had now. Death.
"THE DRUGS DO WORK!!! DIE!!!"
There follows a horribly painful and bloody violence scene that, if I wrote, the fic would have to be bumped up to an R. Plus, it's not suitable for anyone. So you'll have to imagine. Let's just say the end involved Stoned Sturm ripping Sober Adder's head off.
"That'll teach him a lesson."
- - - - -
The author was currently staring out of the window of the private vehicle that he owned. Due to the fact it was his idea to take SAMI-X with him, she was forced to share the carriage with him. She was currently looking at the author in a menacing way. She had a sort of white-eyed, evil beauty, the author thought. But she was still evil.
"Err...so why are you going to the Orange Star Hospital?"
SAMI-X replied simply "To kill the original version of me."
"Ah. Right."
And the vehicle moved on to the Macro Land area.
- - - - -
REVIEW RESPONSES!!!
VM-You've been warned. But thanks for the favourite adding! WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
MotP-Yes, my disciple. Thank you for the nice review. DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN!!!