Dragonia

By Dixxy

Prologue Three: Un-Break My Heart

(Mia)

I want you back so badly. . .

Don't leave me in all this pain
Don't leave me out in the rain
Come back and bring back my smile
Come and take these tears away

While Ryo, Yuli and I went out to try and find Rowen, I couldn't help but think about him. Odd, I know. I know it must sound silly, mourning over a man I hardly knew over a year after his death, and at such a peculiar time, but as I drove down the wet streets of Toyama, I instinctively touched the sweater.

Oh, that sweater doesn't seem like much at first glance. It's just a pink cardigan. It wasn't even a gift or anything- I'd bought it on impulse at a discount store. But it was warm and well loved. I wore it often. But that sweater has come to mean something much more significant than just an impulse buy.

That was the sweater I wore when I first kissed Anubis.

I need your arms to hold me now
The nights are so unkind
Bring back those nights when I held you beside me

It's true, my first encounters with Anubis were far from pleasant. I was the voice of reason amongst some clueless, testosterone driven teenage boys and he was working for the megalomaniac trying to kill them. We were on opposing sides in a war that I was having trouble believing. I was a good girl, and he was a bad boy. By all means it should have never worked out. Anubis used me and Yuli as hostages to taunt at Ryo and the others, but yet, I could never bring myself to truly hate him.

The day that the Ancient spoke to Anubis, Yuli and I watched. I was unsure of what to think- a Dark Warlord was a human? What did this all mean? But as the Ancient One spoke, everything went into perspective. And suddenly Anubis wasn't so bad anymore. He'd been mislead and used like a puppet under Talpa's control. After all, he was only a man.

Naturally it was after he became the Ancient One's successor that things began to truly change. Once Ryo and Rowen had gone after the other three, Anubis stayed with Yuli and me. He played with Yuli when I needed to be left alone, but he was there to talk with me and listen if I needed to express myself. This wasn't my war- I wasn't meant to fight it, and I think I would be lying to say it wasn't affecting me.

Un-break my heart
Say you'll love me again
Undo this hurt you caused
When you walked out the door
And walked outta my life
Un-cry these tears
I cried so many nights
Un-break my heart
My heart

A day later, I began to find myself attracted to him. Anubis was not an ugly man- far from it! His long, silken hair and strong facial features did something to me that no one had ever done and no one has done since then. I liked him, but I brushed it off as a school girl crush. Something I hadn't had for who knows how many years.

After all, I was in an emotional rut! I was in the middle of an inter-dimensional war that would decide the fate of man kind. It isn't easy to assume a person will be level headed in all areas on intellect. It was hard enough keeping my head when it came to sorting through my grandfather's computer files and offering advice to the Ronin Warriors and keeping care of Yuli.

But then, that very same evening, after Yuli went to bed, things were different. We were talking again, but I had allowed myself to get more comfortable with him. I leaned in close, resting my head on his shoulder. He rubbed my shoulder, commenting on the texture of the sweater. That same sweater I wore as I drove around trying to Rowen.

And he kissed me.

Take back that sad word good-bye
Bring back the joy to my life
Don't leave me here with these tears
Come and kiss this pain away
I can't forget the day you left
Time is so unkind
And life is so cruel without you here beside me

I think we both must've somehow sensed our time together was short, but we still spent a good amount of time trying to find ways to help Ryo and Rowen. Anubis mediated and searched through some of the Ancient One's old scrolls. I searched through every file of my grandfather's that I could access. We both took turns taking care of Yuli, who I guessed helped in his own way by keeping our sanity. Something about his youth and optimism helped us through that.

It was two evenings before we found the clue pertaining to the Jewel of Life that things began to fall together. Yuli had long since gone to bed, leaving Anubis and I to our own devices. We talked about different things. I told him about my own history and the tragedies involved with it. And he listened to my every word.

I had been born to a single, unwed mother of sixteen. She had no parents, and my father committed suicide before I was born. It was his father that had taken my mother and me in- my grandfather. For the first few years of my life I was happy. My mother loved me despite the struggles she went through and my grandfather thought I was the most precious gift he'd ever received. To me, I didn't need anything but my mother and my grandfather. They were all I had and all I wanted. They were the only family I ever had.

But they were both snatched away from me.

When I was four, my mother mysteriously vanished. She went out to buy groceries for the three of us. I remember the day well- she'd told me that she was going to bring home the ingredients for banana cream pie, a favorite treat of mine and my grandfather's. She kissed us both good-bye and walked out the front door.

We never saw her again.

For weeks we tried to find her. I was devastated. I didn't want my mother to go away! I wanted her to stay with me! She was, aside from my grandfather, the most important person in my entire life. Without her my world shattered. Thankfully Grandfather didn't leave me for several more years.

Grandfather was both mother and father to me. He'd taught himself to sew in order to repair holes I'd acquired from playing or hemming pants and shirts too big for me. He taught me how to cook, putting up with a very eager but not very adapt learner. He was there for all of my graduations and recitals as a child, even if he was sick or tired. Grandfather was special to me.

Once I was finished, Anubis told me his story. He had two older brothers and his parents. He seemed to care the most for his mother, who imbedded enough honor and dignity into his head that he swore up and down she was the reason he wasn't a complete monster. He missed her the most out of all of them.

When his family was killed, he joined the army in attempts to avenge them. But soon he became more concerned with power and money, making him an easy target for Talpa's mind games. But even after hundreds of years living under Talpa's control, his mother's memory remained at the back of his mind. His mother, even hundreds of years after her death, had saved his life.

We cried in each others arms after that.

The next day we spent researching and searching for clues. Yuli did his part by making all of the meals that day- sandwiches and cereal. Not the fanciest meals, but it helped. I'm so proud of him for doing that. Anubis seemed impressed, too. I don't know what was going through his mind, but he suddenly took it apon himself to take care of the entire house that day. Poor kid was out cold bye eight.

Admittedly, we were tired too, but it wasn't the exhaustion Yuli had placed apon himself. We just couldn't do anymore research. Sure, Ryo and Rowen were fighting a difficult battle, but there was only so much we could do fighting our own battle against the massive amount of books and documents my grandfather had collected over the years. We both collapsed onto the couch, finding ourselves in a very comfortable position.

And things. . . went. . . from there.

I still can't believe I did that, nor do I understand why. That we did that. I grew up never believing I would do something so impulsive or immature. I wasn't married to him or anything- I just followed my desire. I'd always thought it was bad and immoral and wrong. . . I never thought it would feel so right. It wasn't dirty and animalistic like I'd been told- it was passionate and tender. He loved me. Anubis really, truly loved me.

Maybe that was why it happened. We both felt a lack of love in our lives after loosing those dear to us. We were seeking solace in each other. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, and he wanted to spend the rest of his with me. We were tired of being alone and we wanted something to fill that gap. We wanted and needed love. It was the only solution.

Un-break my heart
Say you'll love me again
Undo this hurt you caused
When you walked out the door
And walked outta my life

But things wouldn't stay that way. After the war, I thought that he could stay in the Mortal Realm with me and the Ronin Warriors. We would get married, maybe, and what we had done would seem less bad. Anubis told me he finally had something GOOD to live for. Someone that made him feel like everything would turn out okay.

Destiny had other ideas. Days later, Anubis was ripped out of my life forever.

Un-cry these tears
I cried so many nights
Un-break my heart
My heart

I remember falling to my knees and crying my eyes out when I watched his lifeless body fall face first into the water. I screamed and cried. It felt like a part of my heart had been stolen away. I had just found someone I loved! Someone who loved me! Someone I wanted to spend the rest of my life with!

I hid away from Yuli and Lady Kayura. I didn't want them to see me cry. I wanted to be strong. I had to be strong. We were facing a terrible evil, and the last thing any of us needed was a crybaby. Thankfully I had calmed down enough by the time Lady Kayura found me, still a little dazed and confused as to what happened. She brought me to my feet and walked me back onto that bridge.

That damned bridge.

Don't leave me in all this pain
Don't leave me out in the rain
Bring back the nights when I held you beside me

As I stood there, I was able to put up a defensive shield as I mindlessly told Kayura what had happened and what was going on. In reality, the real me was cowering in the corner of my mind, running back to the memory of Anubis holding me tightly in his arms and whispering sweet words into my ear.

"I love you, Mia."

And I believed him.

"I love you, too, Anubis. I want you to stay with me forever."

"I want to stay with you forever, too."

But no matter what it was that we wanted, it wasn't allowed. Anubis had been chosen to die, possibly even before the Ancient died. Chosen to give up his life so that Lady Kayura could be freed from Badamon's control. And I think that after a while he realized that. Before he went to go after the Ronins, who'd been captured by those barges, he pulled me close, kissed my forehead, and gave me a forlorn look.

"Never forget us, Mia. I love you. I will love you for the rest of my life. No other woman will ever take your place in my heart as long as there is life in this body. No one. You're the only woman I want. You do things to me that I don't understand, but I don't care anymore. I love you, Mia."

Those were the last words he ever said to me.

Un-break my heart
Say you'll love me again
Undo this hurt you caused
When you walked out the door
And walked outta my life
Un-cry these tears
I cried so many, many nights
Un-break my

I spent the days following the war crying my eyes again. Even though I had cried when he died, it didn't really hit me until later. The only-man I had ever truly loved was suddenly gone. Snatched away from me by God damned destiny! All I want is love, damn it! So why won't anyone let me have it!

WHY, DAMN IT, WHY?

Un-break my heart
Come back and say you love me
Un-break my heart
Sweet darlin'
Without you I just can't go on
Can't go on