Hoggy Warty Hogwarts has gone insane!
Scene 3
Harry: Malfoy, I shall put the Engineer Curse on you! (raises wand menacingly)
Malfoy: The what? (starts laughing hysterically)
Harry: You asked for it! (begins to cast curse)
Malfoy: You couldn't curse your way out of a paper bag…
Harry: (casts curse)
Malfoy: (faints, then gets up) I'm an engineer!
Harry: Hah! Now you will say nothing except that until somebody casts the counter curse! Hey… wait a minute! There is no counter curse! But you'll get over this in about a week…maybe a month…maybe a year…BWAHAHAHAHAHA! (runs away)
Malfoy: (angrily) I'm an engineer! (shakes fist)
Part 2 of Scene 3(a Hawaiian based Potions)
Snape: Mr. Malfoy, what would you get if you added youth grapes to pineapple juice?
Malfoy: I'm an engineer!
Snape: That's nice, Malfoy. Now answer my question.
Malfoy: I'm an engineer?
Snape: Ah…the Engineer Curse. I will find out who did this…and they shall be expelled! Unless it was a Slytherin. Then I'll let them slide. Who did this?
Malfoy: (points to Potter) I'm an engineer!
Snape: Potter is an engineer?
Malfoy: (exasperated tone) I'm an engineer.
Snape: OK, I'll run around in circles like a monkey! (runs around in circles like a monkey)
Malfoy: (shaking his head, shouting) I'M AN ENGINEER!!!! I'M AN ENGINEER!
Snape: OK, OK, I'll stop. (stops) Just continue with your potion and don't say anything for the rest of the period.
Malfoy: (nodding, in an obeying tone) I'm an engineer.
Part 3 of Scene 3
Several weeks later…
Malfoy: (marching up to Potter) Now it's time to pay, Potter! I will cast the Howdy Curse on you!
Harry: Oh my god! The what? (starts to laugh)
Malfoy: (casts curse)
Harry: (faints, then gets up) Howdy partner!
Malfoy: Ha ha!
Harry: (casts a no-word spell on Malfoy)
Malfoy: (singing) Love is in the air!
McG: Enough of this! (casts counter curses on both of them)
Part 4 of Scene 3
Later, in the Staff Room…
McG: Honestly, Albus, the students have gone loopy!
DD: You shouldn't call pupils that.
McG: Never mind that…(sniffs) what's that smell?
DD: Smells like…(sniffs) laundry detergent!
McG: What?
DD: It's what Muggles use to clean their clothes. What is it doing here though?
(sound of off-key singing is heard)
DD: Oh, lord…(walks into wardrobe) Severus, how many times have I told you…
Snape: Hee hee hee!