Author: Dana Katherine
Rating: P.G. 13 (just to be safe)
Disclaimer: I don't own them, I'm just borrowing them. I will return them, don't worry. But I do own Mrs. Davis, and Taylor, but feel free to borrow!
Archive: Please. Just drop me a line so I can visit.
Spoilers: Yes
Author's Note: Ok...this is my first X-Files fanfic. I don't know where this is going, or if it's any good, but I have to try. Also, this may become a crossover, but I don't know yet. Oh and this takes place right after Melissa's death, but there are added details. There are also things that happened later in the series in it. Sorry if that was confusing.
Scully POV
All I can do is stare at the flowers surrounding her. Everyone wants to offer their condolences, to tell me how sorry they are. But I can't listen to it right now. I can't deal with the pain. She was so young, why did she have to die? And because of me. I can't help but think that if I hadn't wanted her to come over, she wouldn't have died. She left so much behind, including her daughter, Taylor. Taylor's too young to understand where her mother is, but she misses her. I hear her crying right now for her. I can't stand it anymore, and I abruptly stand up and run out of the church. I sink down on an oak bench under a large shade tree, and although I try to stop them, hot tears stream down my face. Soon I am overcome by the tears and I lay my head in my hands and sob, my whole body shaking. Just as I thought I was going to fall over from the shaking, I felt a strong pair of arms embrace me in a loving hug. I don't have to look and see who it is; I can tell by the strong scent of cologne that it's Mulder. I'm really glad he came. He wasn't going to come; Bill still blames him for Missy's death. But I talked him into it; I knew I would need him. As soon as the tears slow down enough to where I stop shaking, I look up at Mulder. I want to give Mulder a smile, to tell him that I'll make it, and that I appreciate him being here, but I can't. Not now. He removes his arms from around me, and wipes tears from my face. But try as he might, new tears just replace them. He puts his hands on my shoulders and gives me a weak smile. I know what he wants to say, he wants me to go say goodbye to Missy. I don't know if I can, though.
"You need to say goodbye to her one last time Scully, you'll regret it if you don't. I understand..."
"I know, Mulder. I just don't know how I can. I don't know if I can face her, not knowing that it's my fault."
"You know that it's not your fault Scully. And if you're worried about going up there alone, you know I'd follow you up there. I'd follow you anywhere, you know that."
I had to smile at this. It was weak, but a smile nonetheless. He smiles back and grabs my hand. I slowly rise from the bench, and walk towards the church. I enter the door, and my feet seem to stick on the ground. He places his hand on the small of my back, and gently pushes, to reassure me. My mom comes up to us, and asks to speak to Mulder. He tells me to go ahead. I briefly wonder what my mom wants to speak to Mulder about, but that soon leaves my mind when I catch a glimpse of my sister's face. I have a hard time starting to walk again, and once I get started the distance seems to grow with every step I take. It's almost surreal, and I start to hope that it's a dream, but then I arrive next to the casket, and I realized that it's not a dream, it's a reality. I reach over the side and brush my hand on her cheek. She looks so peaceful, and I'd think that she was sleeping, but she feels cold. That and she's dressed up too nice. She's wearing a beautiful blue dress, the one she wore to Taylor's Christening. The thought of Taylor without her mom brings a new wave of tears to my eyes. By this time, Mulder has arrived at my side, offering me a tissue. I take it and wipe at my eyes to no avail. He puts his arms around my waist, and pulls me close. I wipe at my eyes again, and then hand the tissue back to Mulder. Then, with both of my hands free once again, I unclasp my cross necklace, and take it off. I reclasp it and place it in next to my sister. Then my tears start flowing again, and Mulder hands me the tissue again. I kiss my finger tips, and place them on my sister's cheek. Then I can't take it, and I turn around to leave. I head towards the door, but Mulder stops me.
"Don't you want to say bye to your mom and your brothers?"
"No. I can't face them right now."
"Ok."
The conversation ends there, and we head towards the car.
The ride home is silent. When we get to my apartment building, Mulder parks, and we both get out. Mrs. Davis sees us, and heads over. Mrs. Davis is my elderly neighbor. She is very sweet, but quite scatter brained. She is very sweet though, and is always looking out for me.
"Hello Dana. I'm sorry to hear about your sister. How are you holding up?"
"I'm hanging in there. Thank-you."
"Well I hate to run, but I need to get to the market. Good to see you Fox. Bye bye."
She is quite fond of Mulder, just like my mother. She always wonders where he is if she doesn't see him for a while. I see Mulder cringe at the use of his first name, and I have to smile at this, too. When we arrive at my apartment, I let us in, and Mulder shuts the door behind us. He hangs his coat up, and takes mine. I desperately want to change, but I can't yet. There is a potluck at Melissa's in an hour, and I have to be there. They're going to read Melissa's will. So instead I sink into my couch, and Mulder sinks in next to me. He hugs me, and I can't hold the tears back anymore. I sob into Mulder's shoulder, shaking, while he holds me tight.
Well there's the first chapter, hope you like it. PLEASE review if you want me to continue, I really, really, need feedback to know how I'm doing. :0)