It's unlikely I'll respond anymore, now that this story is done. Pt. 2 will be posted as a separate story. I hope it lives up to your expectations and maybe even exceed the quality of this fic. Thank you all for reading and reviewing. I really appreciate the effort. Even though I won't be respoding anymore, I would still love to get reviews – I'll read every one!
Chapter 1 Review Responses:
Lara – you were my first review. Thank you for supporting me, encouraging me, and acting in the unenviable position of my muse. (I tend to yell a lot).
Freyr Van'ir – you were my first real review (I kinda asked Lara to give me one). Your review inspired me to write, well, I forget which scene, but it got me over my writer's block! Thanks, and here's my story.
TAK – awww, thank you!
Deanine – thank you for the advice.
Dawnatella – I appreciate both the compliment and the warm welcome.
Lynx the Tormenter – I hope my story lived up to your expectations. I finally updated, aren't you happy?
Calumongal – thank you, for both the detailed explanation and for the luck.
Haze Tax – Hope you enjoyed this.
CW – You're welcome, you're welcome, you're welcome. Who's Lord Slug? Is that movie a part of the DBZ saga?
Tocole – Thank you! And I'm sorry I didn't update last week; college has kept me so busy I completely forgot!
Chapter 2 Review Responses
I didn't get any. I realize that since I changed the format of my story, doesn't see editing a chapter as an update, so my story failed to jump to the head of the line like it should have. I missed out on a whole week's worth of reviews! So please, go back and review it for me! This space looks so lonely compared to the Prologue.
Chapter 3 Review Responses
Wolf – Thank you!
Rav – did you read my story, of just skim it? Cause questions 3 through 6 were all answered in context, and the others will be answered shortly. Admittedly, I don't go much into detail on number 2.
Meeh – thanks so much for your kind words and your respect. I decided to do this because I was so fed up with stories going on hiatus and never returning; it just wasn't fair. If ever I'm going to leave this story I promise I will proved a detailed summary of what I would have done. In fact, the only difference between my summary and how the actual story would have turned out will be the lack of small, insignificant details that make a description into a story.
K1K – I'll update next week. Actually, I'll update every Friday, so hopefully it'll be up and available every Saturday.
Chapter 4 Review Responses
Marshmellow13Dragon – I hope this chapter answered your question: The corridor Gohan went down is called The Corridor of Time. Hm, you're right about the title. This is the only place it applies. While the Corridor is important as it gets Gohan to the past, it doesn't do much else. I guess I just kept that as title because when I named the fic, I had only written a few chapters. The idea of the Corridor is actually what spawned this fic, but its role is very minor. If I think of a title I like better (or if you supply one) I'll consider changing it. As for Gohan's hair, you can imagine it any way you want. But if you check out my Ch. 04 teaser, I think you'll be pleased. As for Super Saiyjin, you'll have to wait and see! (So will I – I keep changing my mind!) But I feel Gohan was so close to transforming when fighting Frieza (especially after he killed Dende, I think it was) but Piccillo held him back. Gohan arrived sometime after the first tournament and before the second. Gasp! I'm on your favorites?!? (Jumps for joy – literally) Yay!!!! I love you, thank you SO much!
KIK – thanks! I did this cause I hate not seeing an update for a story in months. That, and when I first started reading fanfiction, I stumbled across a Smallvile fic 'The Lost' by Deanine (now called Mere Mortals). She updated every week, and I liked that a lot, so I decided I would do that too f ever I posted a story.
Haze Tax – thank you so much for your compliments! I have completely lost perspective on what's good in this story because I've seen stories so much better. In this one, I can only see what's wrong. I guess it's true – we are our own worst critic. I'm glad I'm not disappointing anybody.
Geminia – Who are you? (Well, actually, I'm asking what are you like and what you liked about my fic but that seemed a little too long to start out with). While you didn't submit a review, thanks a bunch for putting me on your author alert! I really, really appreciate it.
Chapter 5 Review Responses
Marshmellow13Dragon – You're welcome. By the way, your roadrunner shirt… It wouldn't happen to be mostly navy with a lime green rectangle on the front, on in that rectangle is Road Runner's face, with the words 'Smarter, faster, better,' below it, would it? Cause if so, we have the same shirt. LOL.
Rogue 1615 – I'm glad you like the story and that you agree with me about the series. I've never seen GT, but at the end of Z when Pan fought at the tournament… I saw what Gohan was like and I hated it.
DBZ Chick1 – Your wish is my command.
Geminia – Thanks for the compliment. I've really lost perspective on whether the writing for this story is good or bad, so I really appreciate the ego boost.
Marbus – If I interpreted your poem right, you now have chapter 4, and, um, what does 'grammar full review was this' mean?
Hunt – Thank you! I'm glad to know I'm improving.
Chapter 6 Review Responses:
Marshmellow13Dragon – You'll have to wait and see! And I did read the whole review. (I mean, really, if I could read everything Calomungal wrote, what makes you think I wouldn't read yours?)
Chapter 7 Review Responses:
Marshmellow13Dragon – You have been the only one to respond to my last two chapters (at their initial posting) and are by far my most faithful reader. I hereby dedicate this chapter to you. .
DBZ Chick1 – Thanks so much for reviewing, and I hope your family is doing better.
Jolreal – Thank you for the compliments! I aim to please.
Chapter 8 Review Responses:
Subway Saiyan – I only created Mie because I did not see any suitable characters from the series I could have used in her place instead. I did not like Grand or Elder Kai, so I simply added on to the family tree. Do you not like original characters? I love them, so long as they aren't the main character of a fanfiction and don't replace a canon character as a love interest. (And you don't need to worry about that – she's filling a foster big sister role for Gohan). Would you (or anyone) please point out my specific spelling/grammar errors? Even if they don't detract, I'd like them fixed. Are you maybe interested in being my beta? And thanks so much for the info and computer help! I changed my A/N to include a different question… Care to take a look?
Marshmellow13Dragon – hehehe, you shouldn't be so sure of yourself. Bwa ha ha! You made a pretty wrong assumption there. Can you find it before I post chapter 8? Dun deh dun dun… As for the dragon… uh… er… that actually holds no significance until The Bibidi, Babidi, Buu Chronicles Pt 2: Time Distorted (a working title). Stay tuned!
Chapter 9 Review Responses:
Marshmellow13Dragon – right on two out of three, and the third is a maybe cause I haven't made up my mind. Supposedly, Gohan was very close to SSJ during the Freezer saga. If so, then he was here, too. Your choice, I guess. And by the time I finished getting everything ready, it was actually closer to 1 A.M. I live on the east coast of the good ol' U.S.A. Is your time zone really that different? Or it could just be that can take up to 24 hours to upload a story… And of course you can advertise me! I'd love it if you did; that'd be so cool. Thank you thank you thank you thank you…
DBZ Chick1 – Welcome. I love your excitement; it's contagious. I feel hyper now. It's funny, I can eat bags and bags of M&Ms and not get a sugar high, but getting a review…
Rogue1615 – wow, you gave me two reviews, how sweet! LOL. Actually, it reminds me of the first review I made to a friend, and I clicked the submit buttom three times before the window disappeared, so she ended up getting three reviews.
Subway Saiyan – I feel the same way. While Mie isn't 'human', she is only in training, and still very young (by immortal standards anyway). So she isn't perfect; she makes mistakes. She's not in total control. But this'll be more evident in Pt. 2; I don't think I develop her much in Pt. 1. And for the main, it's an omniscient POV. And you've given me something to think on. I really hadn't thought of consciously developing a sibling relationship between Gohan and Mie, though that is how I thought of them. Hmm. As for Ten, I think I put my reason in chapter ten. The marionette is no longer on strings…
Chapter 10
Marshmellow13Dragon – You're abandoning your compatriots come Independence Day?!? Am I missing something here? Just kidding, and congratulations on the move! Gohan doesn't have his tail in my story because he didn't have it during the Freezer saga of the series. And what were you asking about Chi Chi? Goku was never dead, remember? (It's in Chapter 1) So how could he reach Yemma? Or do you mean as parents, are he and Chi Chi going to Otherworld to throttle Yemma? The reason Gohan wasn't hungry was because his matches weren't serious workouts for him. Keep in mind he is much more powerful than the younger versions of his friends. After all, he keeps up with them pretty well when they're older. Boarding school? Ouch. You must know exactly how I feel. Dorm life isn't so great, and I've only been here one night while writing this!
DBS Chick1 – Thank you! And, I'm sorry this update was late, even though I warned everyone. Please forgive me?
WTF – Nice moniker. And I only updated because I made a potentially very offensive mistake in my teaser chapter. I knew had that happened to me, I'd have been mildly upset. And you should know by now that unless stated otherwise, I update once a week, every Friday (or try to) so you shouldn't have expected another chapter so soon. And why did you say 'stop' as though I'd done this before? I hadn't (except when I first posted this fic for lack of understanding the system. I've stated several times I'm bad with a computer). Although I think your review was very rude, thank you for boosting my number. I'm glad to have heard from you and hope you will respond again, hopefully in a more polite way.
Jarole – thank you. And don't worry, Mie isn't as omniscient as she seems right now. (But it'll have to wait till Pt. 2, Time Distorted). I did that to add a bit of mystery around her. I'm so glad you're enjoying the story.
Chapter 11 Review Responses:
Marshmellow13Dragon – I'm so glad you reviewed! You were my only one, though I'm willing to let the newest bug to take the blame for that, since I'm sure all my faithful reviewers were distressed they couldn't review. You were right on some counts, but only some. I won't say which, but I will tell you that I won't be doing the Piccillo saga. For one, I've only caught a few episodes, and two, I want to move on the title part of the story - you know: Bibidi, Babidi, Buu? (now all we need is a fairy godmother and a handful of mice). I don't know if Oolong gambles in the series,. but he does in my story. What does masenko translate to, and what is SBC? I'm writing this on college time, so I can't say anything else. Bye!
Feral-beast – Thanks! And I'm sorry about the updates. I'm in college now, so they won't be as regular as they have been in the past. I try to update once a week, but as you can see, I missed last week.
ESSJGohan – I'm glad you liked it; I do my best.
Chapter 12 Review Responses:
Meeh – I'm sorry. I'll try to do better, But you know, I don't think I did it as many times as you implied. There was when I first used and messed up, and once when I made a potentially rude mistake on this page so I quickly fixed it and updated, and that's all I can think of. I am replacing by RR pages with the actual chapter each time I update, so I don't quite know what you're talking about. I'm sorry I'm annoying you somehow.
Marshmellow13Dragon – Wow, you're the only person who thinks I update quickly. Thanks! I'm so glad you liked the fight and conversation between Gohan and Goku. The Ms. Congeniality thing was the SING. (solar plexis, inside step, nose, groin – that is what it stands for, right?)
DBZ Chick1 – And here it is!
A Shout Out To:
Haze Tax, Lara Roberts, Freyr Van'ir, Marbus, Marshmellow13Dragon and SilentStardust for putting me on 'my favorites' list.
Also to Calumongal, Geminia, Marbus, Marshmellow13Dragon, emeraldragon, demonman21, KatinkaV and SilentStardust for putting me on their author alerts.
Um… Question: On newspaper columns, you know how the lines are both right and left aligned? I know how to do that on MS Word, but is it possible to transfer that to ? And is it possible to upload with color? I wanted to have a tournament board of who advances and what not in color like in the series, but it didn't work. I saw a Zorro story with color once ('A First Time for Everything: Boredom' by Robin4) but how do I get it?
A note to anyone interested in beta-ing my story. I need one. I had a few, but life got in their way, so there are a few ground rules I'm going to set for anyone who wants to apply.
1. I need one chapter a week to be beta'd. Prologue is already done, so I'd ask you to start with Chapter 1.
2. You need to have written and posted a story (in whole or in part) whose genre I'm familiar with, meaning: DBZ, Inuyasha, Rurouni Kenshin, Smallville, Zorro, Terminator, Harry Potter, Ender's Game, Spiderman, and Star Wars. I do have a passing acquaintance with Yu Yu Hakusho and X-Men, but I still find them confusing so I wouldn't recommend using that as your submission. But if that's all you have, go for it. Now, I also need you to specify which story you want me to judge you on, because I'll only choose a beta that I feel writes spectacularly wonderful, as in you-could-publish-a-book wonderful (yes, I'm exaggerating, greatly – Don't be scared! – but I do have high standards)
3. If you beta, I don't just want an overall commentary. In addition, I want specific remarks on grammar and spelling errors, weak plot areas or holes, if something is too unrealistic (even for DBZ) or just needs more explanation, or maybe even less, to tell me if my story's too predictable, too cliché, too anything… Because I want to make sure I'm predictable I'd like to hear your guesses on where this story is going after each chapter. To ensure you don't cheat (cause I sure would) I'll only send you one chapter at a time.
4. I don't just want flattery! I want constructive criticism, too. If you honestly find nothing, tell me specifically what I did right, so I can keep on doing it. I want someone who sees the holes I my story and tears it to shreds so I can make it better than ever before. (Tear gently, please)
5. I also need reliability. If I can get more than one beta I'm satisfied with, and none of you can do a chapter weekly, I can split it up and you guys can share the work. If I only get one good beta and you can eventually beta all my chapters, not as fast as I'd like, but still in a timely manner, then that's ok, too. I'll post unbeta'd and repost when I get the edited chapter.
6. Also, in making corrections, would you please not just fix spelling and grammar but tell me where the mistake was and what it was? You could even just type the correction in next to the mistake and highlight the correction or something. This way I'll know what kind of mistakes I make and try not to make them again as I write. If it's just a typo, or if you feel it really isn't important because it's minor, you could just correct it, I guess.
Honestly, I've only ever had one beta, and that was how she worked. I'm not familiar with any other systems of editing so I don't know if I'll like them or not. But, I am willing to give anything a try. So if you don't want to beta like I ask, but you do meet the other qualifications, I'll try your system and see how it suites. Sound good? Great! Please, please, please apply!