Faulkner: Y'know it's just typical that I get sick with a cold before the
infamous Chicken Festival. And then when I go in hopes that the cold won't
bug me too much, I get a bad stomach ache from some kind of bad school
food. Never have the schools dessert folks. It could be deadly. Add a pissy
math teacher that really needs to get laid to the equation (pun intended)
and you have one helluva week. There's my life. Now excuse me while I go
cough my guts up.
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It was dark. I don't like the dark all that much, but it was okay as long as I could see. But this utter pitch-blackness wasn't in that category since I couldn't see my finger touching my nose. It was really quite disturbing. I mean, how could I tell if I was walking on solid ground? What if I walked straight into a fifty foot deep hole?
I know, I know. Stop all the dramatics. But it really was unsettling. Made me uneasy.
I hesitantly took a step forward and encountered solid ground. So I took another step. And another. Then another and another and another until I was walking normally. I didn't see anyone else, like I was in an endless empty room. I was seriously gettin' creeped out by this.
"Hello? Hellllllloooooooooo?" I called. There was no answer. I wondered how I had suddenly got here. Why wasn't I in my flet, in Lothlorien? I wanted to be back home!
I was startled when I realized that I thought of Lothlorien as home. But why shouldn't I? I was well fed, taught, and even had a friend or two.... I think. And I also realized that I was starting to feel scared. I don't like feeling scared either. With fear comes the feeling of helplessness and dread. I don't like those feelings either.
So I kept calling out, hoping someone would answer me. I didn't care who, just as long as I got out of this strange place. I didn't even know how I got here in the first place! I think I was also starting to panic. Panic wasn't too healthy of a feeling either.
Eventually, those two feelings started to take over. I was panicking and running all over the damn place, yelling for someone to answer me. I didn't care which direction I was heading in. I just didn't care. And I kept on running, frequently changing direction and quite certain I kept covering the same ground.
And then I suddenly ran into someone. I fell flat on my butt and the impact knocked a little sense into me. So I calmed down and got back to my feet.
"Hey? Excuse me, but do you know where I am? Where here is?" I asked the person. I couldn't really see much except for an outline of a figure. "Hey, can you hear me? Answer me!" I think I was starting to panic again.
Wordlessly, the figure started to move and I think it turned around so it was facing me (if it hadn't already been). It moved closer until the outline of two legs, two arms, and a head came into focus. Other than that, I had absolutely no idea what the person looked like.
It stopped about two feet away from me and suddenly the world became bright. I tightly shut my eyes, the suddeness of the light hurting. After a minute I hesitantly opened them, slowly until they adjusted. When they had, I looked at the person and started to quickly backpedal.
It was HIM.
I whimpered as I tried to get away even faster without letting him leave my sight. He had always been dangerous, very dangerous. Even more so when you couldn't see Him. He had always caused me so much pain, even when He wasn't in my prescence.
The sadistic bastard grinned and followed my retreat. I hated Him more than anything else in the world. More than my parents that had abandoned me when I had needed them the most. More than Dr.Stanton who despite all his good intentions never really ever did any good. More than the orderlies that tormented me and made everyday life worse than it already was.
He wasn't exactly an orderly himself, but He was basicly in that same area. He worked at the Institute, but not as a 'keeper of the peace' to put it mildly. Nope, He worked in Block Z. He was the dude that did the electro- therapies. He was the one that was responsible for most of my physical and emotional agonies.
You see, I had been given electro-therapy twice. Both times had been utmost HELL for me. The first time, I had gone temporarily worse than I had supposedly already been. I my body shook for a week nonstop. I couldn't feel my hands or my feet and had been confined to solitary for all of that week.
The second time had been much worse. I had the same symptoms as the last time, and more. The dosage that He had given me the second time was more than He was supposed to have given me. But He didn't get in trouble for it either. Nobody cared if I went temporarily suicidal. My thoughts had become very twisted, the criminally insane couldn't have made much sense out of my thought process. My fascination with knives became very dangerous.
So dangerous that one night, I had snuck out of my room and stole into the kitchen. Once there, I had looked for the biggest knife I could find. That turned out to be a giant meat cleaver. I don't remeber how, but I had gotten the gloves off and started to cut my knuckles. First only shallow cuts, so shallow that they healed in seconds and barely even bled. But they got deeper and deeper and it took longer for them to heal. My blood was soon spattered on the cleaver and on the floor, not to mention my clothes. And because of the electro-therapy, I couldn't feel any of it. For that I was slightly grateful, because I was positive that it had been very painful if I had felt it. I remember that I had gotten close to severing my fingers when a nurse had found me and called orderlies to take care of things.
When my mind had returned to me, I had been shackled to a bed being given sedatives more often than usual. My fingers had ached for days after that. Just because I healed quickly, didn't mean I couldn't feel the pain afterwards.
"Come now, Ashley. I'm only here to help. You did so well the last couple of times." His greasy hair slid forward and covered one watery grey eye from my sight. He held out a thin pale hand with long fingers in my direction.
"NO!" I yelled as loud as I could. This had to be a nightmare. It just had to be! I was safe in Lothlorien, perfectly safe where Haldir had recently lectured me and Rumil had told me about the Valar and Iluvatar and Melkor and Orophin had taught me so much about how to walk quietly through the woods. And then kind Telepcoire with his slightly dry humor was teaching me how to ride.
"I'm not here! You're not here! I'm just dreaming! I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming -" I didn't dare close my eyes but I put my hands over my ears.
"Come Ashley. Give in." he hissed as he drew nearer.
"- I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming." and as I stopped to take a deep breath he was suddenly right in front of me and had his nasty scrawny hands that reminded me of white spiders on my hands and wrenched my hands away from my ears.
"You know this is real. It's as real as your cursed evil. You are a plague upon the world that we are trying to control, but it's so hard to control the uncontrollable."
I would have cried if my mouth and every other part of me hadn't suddenly felt dry and exposed.
"No..." I moaned. I knew it wasn't true. I WASN'T a plague! My powers be dammed but I WASN'T a plague!
His face got barely an inch away from mine and he whispered/hissed quite menacingly to me, "Yessss. You kill whatever you touch. Why do you think your parents got rid of you? They knew what you are, though it took them four years to figure it out. Or maybe they pitied you, or thought they could change you. But *I* know different, don't I?"
I closed my eyes in horror and tried to shut out his words. I felt one of his hands let go of mine and just let the freed hand hang limply by my side. I didn't do anything even when I felt his hand briefly squeeze my hip, then my thigh. But I did start to shiver quite uncontrollably.
It was a well known fact that some patients DID get raped, both male and female. They were also the ones that were treated much better and didn't have to take medication. There was no love shared between the two parties if the contact continued for a week or more. It was just sex for as close to freedom as one could get in the Institute.
"You are a plague, Ashley. And you have infected me." For a second I felt his nasty thin lips on mine.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I wanted to scream. I wanted to scream so loudly that all of Middle-earth would wake-up and say "What the hell was that?" Sadly, I couldn't do that. My throat was closed so tightly that i'd be lucky to get a squeak out. I was shivering horribly, and I didn't even try to stop it. I couldn't have, even if I had wanted to.
It had really been a dream, and yet it hadn't. I could still feel his clammy hands on mine and the disgusting feel of his lips. I jumped out of bed and washed out my mouth at least ten times trying to get rid of the feel of it. It did work to a certain degree, but the feeling didn't wholly leave me, and I shuddered again.
I nervously started rubbing my knuckles. I had a feeling that if I looked, there would be a few more scars added to the already numerous one on them. I guess bashing in faces did have a downside to it. I walked back into the main room and tried to settle back down to sleep. But within five minutes I was up and pacing the room.
I felt caged in. I don't like feeling caged in. And my shivers still hadn't stopped. I couldn't stop them. I just knew that they wouldn't stop on their own for a while. It looked like it was going to be an all-nighter.
"Wanna love ya.
Wanna bug ya.
Wanna squeeze ya, stupid girl."
It was the only thing I could think of at the moment to calm my poor frayed nerves. And it usually worked too.
"Wanna touch ya.
Wanna take ya.
Wanna shaunt ya, stupid girl."
I sat down at the table and brought my knees up to my chest and hugged them as I slowly rocked back and forth.
"I can't take this, born to break this."
I shut my eyes tightly, just concentrating on playing the melody to the song in my head.
"She's going away (she's going away).
What's wrong with my life today?
She's going away (she's going away).
What's wrong with my life today?"
My shakes weren't stopping, or even slowing down, but I was feeling a bit calmer.
"Stupid girl.
Stupid girl."
I took a deep breath, which also helped a little. My mind was getting back to the usual odd way it just was.
"I'm a loner
I'm a loser
I'm a winner in my mind
I'm a bad one
I'm a good one
I'm a sick one with a smile
I can't take this, born to break this
She's going away (she's going away)
What's wrong with my life today?
What's wrong with my life today?
What's wrong with my life today?
Stupid girl
Stupid girl
Stupid girl
Stupid girl."
I felt much better now. I could think clearly and find a way to occupy my mind, hopefully. But it would still be a long night. Yep, a very loooooong night....
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I woke up in the corner of my talan. I had absolutely no idea what time it was, other than daylight. I was too comfortable in my little nest of blankets and pillows that I had scrunched in the corner to get up. I had evidently stripped the bed and moved all the stuff to the corner. Eh, sometimes I just needed to feel closed in. It's a pretty weird desire, but it works every time on getting me to sleep. I only use it on occaison though since I usually sleep for a very long time whenever I use this method.
So, like I said earlier, I was too comfortable to be moving so I stayed where I was and closed my eyes, relaxing. Miriel would burst in any minute anyways, so what was the hurry? Maybe I could even get in a little more sleep. But that was far from likely since once I woke up, I usually stayed up becuase I couldn't get back to sleep.
The door banged open (how did such a silent people make so much noise?) and in stepped Miriel. She only got three steps inside when she noticed that the bed was empty of everything. After quickly glancing in the immediate area, she left again. I just shrugged to myself and closed my eyes again. I guess i'd be getting a little more sleep then because I did fall back into slumber.
It felt like only seconds later when I was roughly shaken. I moaned and tried to bury myself further into the covers. It was to no avail since they were pushed aside and I was picked up slightly and shaken again.
"Wake up! We have no time for your games, Narya!" I groaned again, this time in despair as I recognized Haldir's voice. It sounded a bit gruff to me. Maybe something of the intimate nature was interrupted? Okay, it's too early to deal with these nasty thoughts that keep invading my mind. Waaaay too early.
"UP!" I started at his bellow and tried to stand up. I only succeeded in falling to the ground and hurting my abused bum. Ow. Wooden floors hurt just as much as tile. Even more if there's splinters sticking up. Splinters up butt is not a good thing.
I (much slower and carefully) got into a partially erect position so that I looked more like something of a female version of the Huntchback of Notre Dame. Hey, I was up wasn't I?
I opened my eyes and rubbed them to get the sleepy out so I could see properly. Haldir was only a fuzzy lookin' blur until my sight was cleared. Then he looked like a pissed off Elf.
"Get dressed and hurry. You've overslept and you have a meeting with the Lady for your punishment. I will be waiting outside." and he left and slammed the door.
PUNISHMENT? Now THAT rang a bell in my slower-than-molasses brain. I did something I rarely ever did: I completely skipped my zombie phase of waking up where I didn't move any faster than necessary and didn't talk. I rushed around like a chicken with its head cut off to get ready and left a wee bit of a mess behind. But I did get dressed fairly fast.
So I then found myself walking at a very brisk pace to the royal castle/palace talan. I guess that's where they say everybody when it came to official junk. Haldir didn't talk to me at all and was looking quite stony-faced. Not stoned-faced! Stony-faced. There's a difference, but I won't get into that at the moment.
So we went up the very large staircase that made my legs ache just looking at it, not to mention going up it. When we reached the top he nudged my back and we entered the audience chamber. Galadriel and Celeborn were looking very ethereal and glowy this morning, sitting on their thrones and dressed all fancy-shmancy. What a Kodak moment, where's a camera when ya need one?
I could feel their eyes go over me, probably looking for the injuries that I had gotten in the fight. Well, they wouldn't spot them without looking real good. My black eye had faded during the night and it was only a light shadow now. I had removed the bandage over my knuckles and was very dismayed to find that I did indeed have a new set of scars. Lovely.
"We have been informed that a brawl took place last night between you and Cai." Celeborn said slowly. "This is a grave matter as fights are not tolerated by us, or our people. They are considered childish, and punishment is swift. Cai has already received his, and now you shall get yours." He stopped and looked me in straight in the eyes. Those dark jade eyes were very piercing, I discovered.
"Galadriel and myself have discussed your punishment at length, and agree on the matter that it should not interfere with your training, which is vital. We've decided that since you've acted like a child, you shall be given a childs punishment. Every Free-day you shall have to work in the kitchens, doing whatever the cooks will have you to do. If you shirk one day of this, an extra three will be added to your punishment of a month.
"A MONTH?" I couldn't help but squeak. A month of kitchen duty didn't sound like a lot of fun, if you ask me.
Celeborn nodded. "Yes, a month." I groaned and smacked my forehead a couple of times, hoping I was dreaming again. I looked up to them and sighed as I realized I was very much awake. Damn it all. "Your sentence starts today." And we were dismissed.
Back down the staircase, with me bitchin' and moanin' all the way down. A couple of days of solitary was better than this! A whole MONTH of kitchen work was definitely not cool man. I just didn't DO kitchen work. I didn't even know how cook oatmeal in a microwave for Pete's sake! Let alone do stuff the archaic way! Man, this just really bites.
We passed the dining hall where meals were eaten and Haldir lead me to a building connected to it, but a bit smaller than the dining hall itself with a low ceiling and a few chimneys. The whole place was bustling with activity even though breakfast had probably been over for a good hour or so. Which reminded me that I hadn't had any breakfast. At this rate I probably wasn't going to get one either.
Haldir called over some she-elf and spoke to her briefly with a few gestures towards me. She smiled kindly at me and said something back to him before he left me there with this stranger. Isn't he a nice guy? Ain't that the understatement of the year!
"I am Adalina." she spoke slowly. I guess she couldn't speak English too well. Either that or thought I was very stupid. But the latter was very unlikely. "I have been requested to help you out on your first few days here. I'm one of the few of the people who work in the kitchens that know the Common Tongue."
She led me around the kitchens, showing me where everything was in case I was needed to fetch something for someone (of course I probably wouldn't be of much help since I wouldn't be able to even UNDERSTAND THEM). I was also told the rules of the kitchen, mostly what I wasn't allowed to touch and/or use, wash my hands before handling food, blah blah blah. The usual kitchen safety shit. And since I had never before worked in a kitchen before I had to listen carefully and remember it all.
Adalina occaisonally tripped over words, but I didn't give her any grief over it. Hell, she was better at English than I was at Elvish! And after all the formality stuff was taken care of I was given my first assignment.
I had to cut vegetables. A lot of vegetables. And when I say a lot of vegetables I MEAN a LOT of VEGETABLES.
I sat down at the table and was handed a knife and a few bowls to put the cut vegetables in. Then I was left alone ot have at it. I realized when I started to cut the green things that my hands were still shaking from last night. It was weird that they hadn't quite stopped yet. At least my bodies shaking had stopped. I just hoped that my hands would be steady enough to do this so I didn't acidentally cut something that I might need off.
And it wasn't exactly easy, but once I got the knife into the food my hand steadied a little and I could make fairly straight cuts. But after a while my hand started cramping up from holding the knife so tightly to help keep it still. I had to stop every so often to stretch and massage it a little before going back to cutting.
Adalina checked up on me once in a while to see how I was doing and to give me hints. Thankfully she didn't notice my shaking, and if she did she didn't mention it. And then (quite surprisingly if you ask me) I was finished. All the cut vegetables were in bowls, ready to be cooked or stored. And then Adalina was by my side and telling me what to do with them.
Who knew cooking could be such a pain in the butt. Especially when it was only vegetables! I hate vegetables. Especially cauliflower. Nasty ass stuff, cauliflower. Gave me the willies.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Faulkner: Voila! There's chapter fourteen for ya'll! The song was "Stupid Girl" by Cold. It sounds a lot cooler and longer than it looks on screen though. Weird. Aaaaaaaaand, I finished the Silmarillion! EAT THAT TOLKIEN! I just hope I don't forget any of the imprtant stuff. I always seem to forget some imprtant detail....
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It was dark. I don't like the dark all that much, but it was okay as long as I could see. But this utter pitch-blackness wasn't in that category since I couldn't see my finger touching my nose. It was really quite disturbing. I mean, how could I tell if I was walking on solid ground? What if I walked straight into a fifty foot deep hole?
I know, I know. Stop all the dramatics. But it really was unsettling. Made me uneasy.
I hesitantly took a step forward and encountered solid ground. So I took another step. And another. Then another and another and another until I was walking normally. I didn't see anyone else, like I was in an endless empty room. I was seriously gettin' creeped out by this.
"Hello? Hellllllloooooooooo?" I called. There was no answer. I wondered how I had suddenly got here. Why wasn't I in my flet, in Lothlorien? I wanted to be back home!
I was startled when I realized that I thought of Lothlorien as home. But why shouldn't I? I was well fed, taught, and even had a friend or two.... I think. And I also realized that I was starting to feel scared. I don't like feeling scared either. With fear comes the feeling of helplessness and dread. I don't like those feelings either.
So I kept calling out, hoping someone would answer me. I didn't care who, just as long as I got out of this strange place. I didn't even know how I got here in the first place! I think I was also starting to panic. Panic wasn't too healthy of a feeling either.
Eventually, those two feelings started to take over. I was panicking and running all over the damn place, yelling for someone to answer me. I didn't care which direction I was heading in. I just didn't care. And I kept on running, frequently changing direction and quite certain I kept covering the same ground.
And then I suddenly ran into someone. I fell flat on my butt and the impact knocked a little sense into me. So I calmed down and got back to my feet.
"Hey? Excuse me, but do you know where I am? Where here is?" I asked the person. I couldn't really see much except for an outline of a figure. "Hey, can you hear me? Answer me!" I think I was starting to panic again.
Wordlessly, the figure started to move and I think it turned around so it was facing me (if it hadn't already been). It moved closer until the outline of two legs, two arms, and a head came into focus. Other than that, I had absolutely no idea what the person looked like.
It stopped about two feet away from me and suddenly the world became bright. I tightly shut my eyes, the suddeness of the light hurting. After a minute I hesitantly opened them, slowly until they adjusted. When they had, I looked at the person and started to quickly backpedal.
It was HIM.
I whimpered as I tried to get away even faster without letting him leave my sight. He had always been dangerous, very dangerous. Even more so when you couldn't see Him. He had always caused me so much pain, even when He wasn't in my prescence.
The sadistic bastard grinned and followed my retreat. I hated Him more than anything else in the world. More than my parents that had abandoned me when I had needed them the most. More than Dr.Stanton who despite all his good intentions never really ever did any good. More than the orderlies that tormented me and made everyday life worse than it already was.
He wasn't exactly an orderly himself, but He was basicly in that same area. He worked at the Institute, but not as a 'keeper of the peace' to put it mildly. Nope, He worked in Block Z. He was the dude that did the electro- therapies. He was the one that was responsible for most of my physical and emotional agonies.
You see, I had been given electro-therapy twice. Both times had been utmost HELL for me. The first time, I had gone temporarily worse than I had supposedly already been. I my body shook for a week nonstop. I couldn't feel my hands or my feet and had been confined to solitary for all of that week.
The second time had been much worse. I had the same symptoms as the last time, and more. The dosage that He had given me the second time was more than He was supposed to have given me. But He didn't get in trouble for it either. Nobody cared if I went temporarily suicidal. My thoughts had become very twisted, the criminally insane couldn't have made much sense out of my thought process. My fascination with knives became very dangerous.
So dangerous that one night, I had snuck out of my room and stole into the kitchen. Once there, I had looked for the biggest knife I could find. That turned out to be a giant meat cleaver. I don't remeber how, but I had gotten the gloves off and started to cut my knuckles. First only shallow cuts, so shallow that they healed in seconds and barely even bled. But they got deeper and deeper and it took longer for them to heal. My blood was soon spattered on the cleaver and on the floor, not to mention my clothes. And because of the electro-therapy, I couldn't feel any of it. For that I was slightly grateful, because I was positive that it had been very painful if I had felt it. I remember that I had gotten close to severing my fingers when a nurse had found me and called orderlies to take care of things.
When my mind had returned to me, I had been shackled to a bed being given sedatives more often than usual. My fingers had ached for days after that. Just because I healed quickly, didn't mean I couldn't feel the pain afterwards.
"Come now, Ashley. I'm only here to help. You did so well the last couple of times." His greasy hair slid forward and covered one watery grey eye from my sight. He held out a thin pale hand with long fingers in my direction.
"NO!" I yelled as loud as I could. This had to be a nightmare. It just had to be! I was safe in Lothlorien, perfectly safe where Haldir had recently lectured me and Rumil had told me about the Valar and Iluvatar and Melkor and Orophin had taught me so much about how to walk quietly through the woods. And then kind Telepcoire with his slightly dry humor was teaching me how to ride.
"I'm not here! You're not here! I'm just dreaming! I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming -" I didn't dare close my eyes but I put my hands over my ears.
"Come Ashley. Give in." he hissed as he drew nearer.
"- I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming I'm dreaming." and as I stopped to take a deep breath he was suddenly right in front of me and had his nasty scrawny hands that reminded me of white spiders on my hands and wrenched my hands away from my ears.
"You know this is real. It's as real as your cursed evil. You are a plague upon the world that we are trying to control, but it's so hard to control the uncontrollable."
I would have cried if my mouth and every other part of me hadn't suddenly felt dry and exposed.
"No..." I moaned. I knew it wasn't true. I WASN'T a plague! My powers be dammed but I WASN'T a plague!
His face got barely an inch away from mine and he whispered/hissed quite menacingly to me, "Yessss. You kill whatever you touch. Why do you think your parents got rid of you? They knew what you are, though it took them four years to figure it out. Or maybe they pitied you, or thought they could change you. But *I* know different, don't I?"
I closed my eyes in horror and tried to shut out his words. I felt one of his hands let go of mine and just let the freed hand hang limply by my side. I didn't do anything even when I felt his hand briefly squeeze my hip, then my thigh. But I did start to shiver quite uncontrollably.
It was a well known fact that some patients DID get raped, both male and female. They were also the ones that were treated much better and didn't have to take medication. There was no love shared between the two parties if the contact continued for a week or more. It was just sex for as close to freedom as one could get in the Institute.
"You are a plague, Ashley. And you have infected me." For a second I felt his nasty thin lips on mine.
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I wanted to scream. I wanted to scream so loudly that all of Middle-earth would wake-up and say "What the hell was that?" Sadly, I couldn't do that. My throat was closed so tightly that i'd be lucky to get a squeak out. I was shivering horribly, and I didn't even try to stop it. I couldn't have, even if I had wanted to.
It had really been a dream, and yet it hadn't. I could still feel his clammy hands on mine and the disgusting feel of his lips. I jumped out of bed and washed out my mouth at least ten times trying to get rid of the feel of it. It did work to a certain degree, but the feeling didn't wholly leave me, and I shuddered again.
I nervously started rubbing my knuckles. I had a feeling that if I looked, there would be a few more scars added to the already numerous one on them. I guess bashing in faces did have a downside to it. I walked back into the main room and tried to settle back down to sleep. But within five minutes I was up and pacing the room.
I felt caged in. I don't like feeling caged in. And my shivers still hadn't stopped. I couldn't stop them. I just knew that they wouldn't stop on their own for a while. It looked like it was going to be an all-nighter.
"Wanna love ya.
Wanna bug ya.
Wanna squeeze ya, stupid girl."
It was the only thing I could think of at the moment to calm my poor frayed nerves. And it usually worked too.
"Wanna touch ya.
Wanna take ya.
Wanna shaunt ya, stupid girl."
I sat down at the table and brought my knees up to my chest and hugged them as I slowly rocked back and forth.
"I can't take this, born to break this."
I shut my eyes tightly, just concentrating on playing the melody to the song in my head.
"She's going away (she's going away).
What's wrong with my life today?
She's going away (she's going away).
What's wrong with my life today?"
My shakes weren't stopping, or even slowing down, but I was feeling a bit calmer.
"Stupid girl.
Stupid girl."
I took a deep breath, which also helped a little. My mind was getting back to the usual odd way it just was.
"I'm a loner
I'm a loser
I'm a winner in my mind
I'm a bad one
I'm a good one
I'm a sick one with a smile
I can't take this, born to break this
She's going away (she's going away)
What's wrong with my life today?
What's wrong with my life today?
What's wrong with my life today?
Stupid girl
Stupid girl
Stupid girl
Stupid girl."
I felt much better now. I could think clearly and find a way to occupy my mind, hopefully. But it would still be a long night. Yep, a very loooooong night....
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I woke up in the corner of my talan. I had absolutely no idea what time it was, other than daylight. I was too comfortable in my little nest of blankets and pillows that I had scrunched in the corner to get up. I had evidently stripped the bed and moved all the stuff to the corner. Eh, sometimes I just needed to feel closed in. It's a pretty weird desire, but it works every time on getting me to sleep. I only use it on occaison though since I usually sleep for a very long time whenever I use this method.
So, like I said earlier, I was too comfortable to be moving so I stayed where I was and closed my eyes, relaxing. Miriel would burst in any minute anyways, so what was the hurry? Maybe I could even get in a little more sleep. But that was far from likely since once I woke up, I usually stayed up becuase I couldn't get back to sleep.
The door banged open (how did such a silent people make so much noise?) and in stepped Miriel. She only got three steps inside when she noticed that the bed was empty of everything. After quickly glancing in the immediate area, she left again. I just shrugged to myself and closed my eyes again. I guess i'd be getting a little more sleep then because I did fall back into slumber.
It felt like only seconds later when I was roughly shaken. I moaned and tried to bury myself further into the covers. It was to no avail since they were pushed aside and I was picked up slightly and shaken again.
"Wake up! We have no time for your games, Narya!" I groaned again, this time in despair as I recognized Haldir's voice. It sounded a bit gruff to me. Maybe something of the intimate nature was interrupted? Okay, it's too early to deal with these nasty thoughts that keep invading my mind. Waaaay too early.
"UP!" I started at his bellow and tried to stand up. I only succeeded in falling to the ground and hurting my abused bum. Ow. Wooden floors hurt just as much as tile. Even more if there's splinters sticking up. Splinters up butt is not a good thing.
I (much slower and carefully) got into a partially erect position so that I looked more like something of a female version of the Huntchback of Notre Dame. Hey, I was up wasn't I?
I opened my eyes and rubbed them to get the sleepy out so I could see properly. Haldir was only a fuzzy lookin' blur until my sight was cleared. Then he looked like a pissed off Elf.
"Get dressed and hurry. You've overslept and you have a meeting with the Lady for your punishment. I will be waiting outside." and he left and slammed the door.
PUNISHMENT? Now THAT rang a bell in my slower-than-molasses brain. I did something I rarely ever did: I completely skipped my zombie phase of waking up where I didn't move any faster than necessary and didn't talk. I rushed around like a chicken with its head cut off to get ready and left a wee bit of a mess behind. But I did get dressed fairly fast.
So I then found myself walking at a very brisk pace to the royal castle/palace talan. I guess that's where they say everybody when it came to official junk. Haldir didn't talk to me at all and was looking quite stony-faced. Not stoned-faced! Stony-faced. There's a difference, but I won't get into that at the moment.
So we went up the very large staircase that made my legs ache just looking at it, not to mention going up it. When we reached the top he nudged my back and we entered the audience chamber. Galadriel and Celeborn were looking very ethereal and glowy this morning, sitting on their thrones and dressed all fancy-shmancy. What a Kodak moment, where's a camera when ya need one?
I could feel their eyes go over me, probably looking for the injuries that I had gotten in the fight. Well, they wouldn't spot them without looking real good. My black eye had faded during the night and it was only a light shadow now. I had removed the bandage over my knuckles and was very dismayed to find that I did indeed have a new set of scars. Lovely.
"We have been informed that a brawl took place last night between you and Cai." Celeborn said slowly. "This is a grave matter as fights are not tolerated by us, or our people. They are considered childish, and punishment is swift. Cai has already received his, and now you shall get yours." He stopped and looked me in straight in the eyes. Those dark jade eyes were very piercing, I discovered.
"Galadriel and myself have discussed your punishment at length, and agree on the matter that it should not interfere with your training, which is vital. We've decided that since you've acted like a child, you shall be given a childs punishment. Every Free-day you shall have to work in the kitchens, doing whatever the cooks will have you to do. If you shirk one day of this, an extra three will be added to your punishment of a month.
"A MONTH?" I couldn't help but squeak. A month of kitchen duty didn't sound like a lot of fun, if you ask me.
Celeborn nodded. "Yes, a month." I groaned and smacked my forehead a couple of times, hoping I was dreaming again. I looked up to them and sighed as I realized I was very much awake. Damn it all. "Your sentence starts today." And we were dismissed.
Back down the staircase, with me bitchin' and moanin' all the way down. A couple of days of solitary was better than this! A whole MONTH of kitchen work was definitely not cool man. I just didn't DO kitchen work. I didn't even know how cook oatmeal in a microwave for Pete's sake! Let alone do stuff the archaic way! Man, this just really bites.
We passed the dining hall where meals were eaten and Haldir lead me to a building connected to it, but a bit smaller than the dining hall itself with a low ceiling and a few chimneys. The whole place was bustling with activity even though breakfast had probably been over for a good hour or so. Which reminded me that I hadn't had any breakfast. At this rate I probably wasn't going to get one either.
Haldir called over some she-elf and spoke to her briefly with a few gestures towards me. She smiled kindly at me and said something back to him before he left me there with this stranger. Isn't he a nice guy? Ain't that the understatement of the year!
"I am Adalina." she spoke slowly. I guess she couldn't speak English too well. Either that or thought I was very stupid. But the latter was very unlikely. "I have been requested to help you out on your first few days here. I'm one of the few of the people who work in the kitchens that know the Common Tongue."
She led me around the kitchens, showing me where everything was in case I was needed to fetch something for someone (of course I probably wouldn't be of much help since I wouldn't be able to even UNDERSTAND THEM). I was also told the rules of the kitchen, mostly what I wasn't allowed to touch and/or use, wash my hands before handling food, blah blah blah. The usual kitchen safety shit. And since I had never before worked in a kitchen before I had to listen carefully and remember it all.
Adalina occaisonally tripped over words, but I didn't give her any grief over it. Hell, she was better at English than I was at Elvish! And after all the formality stuff was taken care of I was given my first assignment.
I had to cut vegetables. A lot of vegetables. And when I say a lot of vegetables I MEAN a LOT of VEGETABLES.
I sat down at the table and was handed a knife and a few bowls to put the cut vegetables in. Then I was left alone ot have at it. I realized when I started to cut the green things that my hands were still shaking from last night. It was weird that they hadn't quite stopped yet. At least my bodies shaking had stopped. I just hoped that my hands would be steady enough to do this so I didn't acidentally cut something that I might need off.
And it wasn't exactly easy, but once I got the knife into the food my hand steadied a little and I could make fairly straight cuts. But after a while my hand started cramping up from holding the knife so tightly to help keep it still. I had to stop every so often to stretch and massage it a little before going back to cutting.
Adalina checked up on me once in a while to see how I was doing and to give me hints. Thankfully she didn't notice my shaking, and if she did she didn't mention it. And then (quite surprisingly if you ask me) I was finished. All the cut vegetables were in bowls, ready to be cooked or stored. And then Adalina was by my side and telling me what to do with them.
Who knew cooking could be such a pain in the butt. Especially when it was only vegetables! I hate vegetables. Especially cauliflower. Nasty ass stuff, cauliflower. Gave me the willies.
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Faulkner: Voila! There's chapter fourteen for ya'll! The song was "Stupid Girl" by Cold. It sounds a lot cooler and longer than it looks on screen though. Weird. Aaaaaaaaand, I finished the Silmarillion! EAT THAT TOLKIEN! I just hope I don't forget any of the imprtant stuff. I always seem to forget some imprtant detail....