10 Or More Ways To Lose A Hojou

Author's Note: Major writer's block…major

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Feeling the throbbing pain in his crotch area, InuYasha sat down on his comfortable bed gently. Sighing as the pain lessened as he stopped moving.

InuYasha felt humiliated, but he wasn't about to back down now. He got a mischievous grin in his face and made sure that the relationship that he was going to have with the ningen was pure hell for her and pure fun for him.

He wanted Kikyou off his back and he'd much rather liked a fiery, tempermental ningen to an insane one.

'Now… how am I supposed to… ah ha!'

With a few calls to certain gossips and with the help of his gang… the stage was set and all it needed were the actors. Grinning like mad, InuYasha dashed off to sleep, hoping that tomorrow would come soon.

' Sleep well Kagome… because you'll need it…'

As he turned over, he screamed in pain, waking up his entire family in the process.

" Still hurts, little brother?" SesshouMaru taunted, a smirk on his usually stoic face. " I must admit… I really wanted a camera present on that moment…"

" Shut up! I'm going through with the bet… this just means war between me and my little…Kagome," InuYasha said through gritted teeth.

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Kagome couldn't believe her luck. Not only did InuYasha spread their 'relationship' around, he even made sure to act like they were real couples. He would come by in between classes to show her his hangouts and walk her to class.

' I have a funny feeling I didn't make things better…' she thought as a group of girls made their way towards her. The leader, looked surprisingly like her.

" Are you Higurashi Kagome?" the girl asked, her voice dripping with venom

" Er… yes… and you are?"

"Kikyou."

Kagome blinked, looking at her scowling face. 'I've heard that name before… now where have I heard that from?'

" Kikyou… hm…" Kagome's face lit up with recognition and she smiled brightly. " Oh! You're the girl Naraku has his eyes on!"

The girls in Kikyou's group suddenly vanished as she screamed in horror and in anger. She was about to charge at Kagome, her purse ready for target practice.

" DIE WENCH!"

Within seconds, Kagome heard InuYasha's voice yelling for her. "Kagome! Come on, I'll drive you home."

Before the girl, Kikyou could retort, InuYasha had carried Kagome towards his car. " You know, when you see Kikyou… run for your life."

Kagome kept silent. As InuYasha drove the car, Kagome thought out her plan.

How to lose Hojou:

Step 1: hire a boyfriend

looking at InuYasha, she sighed as she added a few comments in.

-preferably someone who has the same hobbies as you, and someone more…sensitive.

Kagome rested her head on her hand, propped up on the door. They drove past her house and she seethed.

Someone who knows where your house is

" Eto… um… InuYasha?"

"yeah?"

" You missed my house."

InuYasha blinked, and laughed. " Oh, when I said I'd drive you home, I meant drive you to my home. We can't very well be a couple without you knowing who my parents are!"

Kagome sank in her seat and wondered what she had done that he would turn so… insane.

'Oh yea… I kicked his nuts.'

As they reached a driveway, Kagome saw Kikyou again, this time, she was speeding towards them in a shiny red convertible.

" Higurashi! "

Sinking even lower to her seat as InuYasha noticed the girl, she closed her eyes and prayed for a miracle. InuYasha sped up and began to race inside a gate. Kagome opened her eyes and gasped as she saw a large mansion.

" INUYASHA!"

She thought back to her plan and added a new step.

2. Step 2: Make sure your 'boyfriend' has no strange ties to anyone… homicidal.

"Come on, mom would love to meet my fiancée!"

Kagome paled and stopped. InuYasha fell flat on his back, still clutching Kagome's hand. " Why'd you stop?"

"Fiancée?!" Kagome shrieked.

Make sure you know who you're dealing with…

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Author's Note: hahahahaha! It backfired! Bwahaha… um… just a note: for those of you trying to get rid of a stalker…do not use my steps…