Author: Erika
E-mail: freakrightout@hotmail.com
Title: Back Into Oblivion
Characters: Josh, Donna, Ryan, Sam
Category: Angst
Pairing: Josh/Sam friendship
Rating: PG-13

Spoilers: Just to be safe, let's say all the seasons, but especially ITSOTG (I & II), Noel, and Disaster Relief
Summary: What happens when Josh is pushed over the edge?

Notes: I've had this story floating around in my mind now. Also, I just love the Josh angst. I decided to bring Sam into the story because of the brief mention of our beloved former Deputy of Communications.

Disclaimer: Although I often like to believe that Josh Lyman is mine, all characters belong to Aaron Sorkin's genius mind.

SATURDAY. 12:08 A.M.

Donna knocked on Josh's door. When she didn't get a reply, she opened the door and stuck her head into his office. "Josh?" She waited for a response, but once again, received nothing. "Josh? It's past midnight, you should get home."

He turned in his chair to face her, running a hand through his unruly curls. "Yeah. Yeah, I will, I'm just…thinking."

"About?"

He paused, as if debating whether he wanted to tell her. "Everything. Nothing. I don't know." He sighed. "You should go home. It's past midnight."

Donna took a couple steps forward. "Josh…are you okay?" she asked, concerned. "Do you want me to get Ryan to take you home?"

He chuckled at that. "He's still here?"
"He's worried about you."

"He's a good kid, Donna. He really is."

"Yeah. He said you threatened the Capitol."

"I was drunk."

"He told me you weren't."

"I told him I wasn't," he replied, his voice gaining on edge."

"Okay," she said, not wanting to upset him. "Josh--"

"I'm fine, Donna. I'm just a little tired, it's been a long day. You should go home."

"I'll stay if you need me."

"I know. But really, I'm fine, go. I'll see you tomorrow."

"How are you getting home?"

Josh let out an inaudible sigh. "Walking. I'm an outdoors--"

"Don't even say it," Donna laughed. "Okay, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah, bye."

"Bye, Josh," she replied, leaving the office and closing the door behind her. She was just out of the bullpen when a voice stopped her.

"Donna, is he okay?"

She turned to see Ryan. She gave him a small smile. "I hope so. Keep on eye on him for me, will you?"

"Sure."

"Thanks. See you tomorrow."

"Right."

As Donna walked away, Ryan headed to Josh's office. He entered without knocking and plopped down on his boss's couch. "Hi, Josh," he greeted cheerfully.

"You're supposed to knock," Josh chastised, glaring at his intern. "And you're too chipper. It's past midnight."

"Chipper?"

"Shut up. Why are you still here? You should be home."

Ryan shrugged. "I could say the same thing to you."

"I'd fire you."

"No, you wouldn't."

"That's not the point."

"Seriously, you should be the home going home right now. Get some rest, you look really tired."

"You and Donna are conspiring against me, aren't you?"

Ryan laughed. "What makes you think it's not Donna, me, and the rest of the staff?" he joked. He looked down at his shoes for his next question. "So, uh…you want me to take you home?" He rolled his eyes, knowing what the answer would me.

Josh hesitated before speaking. "Would you mind?"

Ryan's head shot up. "No, of course I wouldn't mind. Let's go."

12:26

Ryan pulled up to the curb in front of Josh's apartment.

"Thanks for the ride, I really appreciate," Josh said quietly.

"Anytime," Ryan replied. "Really."

Josh glanced at his fellow Harvard alum and nodded in understanding. "See you tomorrow," he said, climbing out of the car. He shut the door and waved. Ryan gave Josh a nod before driving off.

Josh sighed as he watched Ryan drive away. He stood on the sidewalk for a few moments, rooted in place, dazed and thinking of the events that had taken place in the last few weeks. He barely had time to react when he felt something cold press into his back and a low voice whispered, "You make a sound, you die. Move."

Josh allowed the man to pull him into the alley between his apartment building and the next. All he could feel was fear and pain rising in his chest. He prayed that this wouldn't be a repeat of what had happened to him at Rosslyn. He noticed that he was no longer alone with his captor. He was being surrounded by what had to be seven or eight men, all equipped with their own baseball bat. Oh, God, Josh thought. Please, God, no, don't do this to me.

"Mr. Lyman," the man with the gun said, "Virginia White Pride wasn't able to rid the world of your presence. And as much as we'd like to, we're not here to finish the job."

God, if you can hear me…

"We're here to see to it that you suffer. We don't take kindly to Jews, and especially not Jews with power. We're here to make sure you understand something very important."

Stop this. Please help me.

"You have no place here."

Josh felt a sudden, excruciating pain in his abdomen, which was quickly followed by another devastating blow. The men were all over him, throwing fists against his face, bats against his ribs, elbows against his chest…

Lord, please hear me.

He didn't know how long the beating lasted. He had moved on from praying for help to praying for something, anything, to knock him out. Reality was beginning to look fuzzy when everything stopped.

"The cops!" one of them yelled. "Let's get the hell out of here!"

Oh, how convenient.

He gasped in pain when he felt a hand on his surely broken shoulder. He squinted his eyes to see who was there.

"Mr. Lyman! Mr. Lyman, I heard the noise, and I…Oh, God, Mr. Lyman, please answer me!"

"Brad?" Josh croaked, vaguely remembering his neighbor's name. The sirens were much louder now. 'Where's Toby?' Josh wanted to ask. 'He's supposed to be here. He's supposed to find me.'

"Don't worry, Mr. Lyman, the ambulance is here! You're going to be okay!"

"Okay," Josh echoed. I'll never be okay. "Okay."