Author: Erika
E-mail: freakrightout@hotmail.com
Title: Back Into Oblivion
Characters: Josh, Donna, Ryan, Sam
Category: Angst
Pairing: Josh/Sam friendship
Rating: PG-13

Spoilers: Just to be safe, let's say all the seasons, but especially ITSOTG (I & II), Noel, and Disaster Relief
Summary: What happens when Josh is pushed over the edge?

Notes: I've had this story floating around in my mind now. Also, I just love the Josh angst. I decided to bring Sam into the story because of the brief mention of our beloved former Deputy of Communications.

Disclaimer: Although I often like to believe that Josh Lyman is mine, all characters belong to Aaron Sorkin's genius mind.

12:56 A.M.

Leo groaned and looked up from his paperwork when heard a knock on his door. "What?" he called."

Margaret opened the door and slowly stepped in. Leo stiffened when he saw her grim expression. "Margaret?"

"GW just called."

Leo gulped, feeling a tug at his heart. "Why?"

"Josh."

No. "What happened?"

"He was attacked."

Leo immediately stood and head out the door. "I want a car ready to take me to GW now."

"Leo…"

"Just do it!" he exclaimed, speeding up. He refused to stop for anyone until someone grabbed his arm.

"Leo, what is it?"

"Toby, I don't have time right now."

"Leo!"

He let out a heavy sigh. "Josh was taken to GW."

"What? Why? What happened?"

"He was attacked."

"Oh, my God. How bad is he?"

"I don't know yet. I'm going over there right now."

"I'll tell C.J. We'll meet up with you there."

"Did everyone decide to stay here past midnight?"

Toby shrugged, starting towards C.J.'s office.

"Toby! Call Donna for me, okay?"

"Yeah."

"I should call Sam." It was actually more of a question than a statement.

Toby paused. "Yeah."

"I'll see you at the hospital."

CALIFORNIA

SAM SEABORNE'S OFFICE

He pulled the phone off its hook after the first ring. "Sam Seaborne."

"Hi, Sam."

"Leo?"

"Yeah, how are you?"

"I'm good!" Sam exclaimed, excited to hear from his former boss. "What's up?"

"Sam, listen…" Leo trailed.

Sam's smile faded. Something bad had happened. He could feel it. "Oh, God, no."

"Sam…"

"What happened?"

Leo hesitated before bitterly replying, "The bastards beat him, Sam. They beat him."

Sam felt bile rising in his throat. "How bad?" he choked.

"Bad."

"Is he awake?"

"Yeah, but he's in a lot of pain."

"I'm going to get the next flight out."

"You're sure?"

"Absolutely."

"Want me to pick you up from the airport?"

"You should stay with Josh. I'll be fine."

"Okay. See you soon."

"Yeah, bye," Sam replied. He hung up the phone and rubbed his temples. Getting time off from work wouldn't be a problem, considering he had the White House behind him. He reached for the phone again and dialed a number. "Yes, I'd like to book a seat on the next flight to Washington , D.C. "

1:49 A.M.

Leo took a deep breath before walking back into Josh's hospital room. He put a hand on Donna's arm. She looked up and gave him a small smile before putting her attention back on Josh.

"He's sleeping?" he asked, nodding when she replied affirmatively. His deputy looked so still. Too still. "I can't believe this happened."

There was a brief silence. "He's in so much pain, Leo," she said, holding back a sob. "I don't know if he can handle this. With everything that's happened recently…"

"I know. And I haven't been helping. I've been giving him so much crap about the Carrick thing, and Angela Blake, and Ryan Pierce--"

"You should call him. Ryan, I mean. He'd want to know."

"Okay. Sam's going to be flying in soon. I just got off the phone with him."

"Good, Josh will be happy to hear that."

"Donna…I don't want you handling this yourself. With Josh out, there's going to be more work, which means we're going to need everyone there."

"I know," she murmured, tightening her grip on Josh's unbroken hand.

"Sam's going to be here. He can take care of Josh, and so can the rest of us. Don't kill yourself trying to watch over him, do you understand?"

"I understand," she replied. She looked up at Leo. "Does the President know what happened?"

Leo sighed. "Charlie told him. The Secret Service had to do everything short of locking him in the Residence to stop him from running here in his underwear."

"We wouldn't want that."

Leo chucked. "No, we wouldn't."

"What about the others?"

"Toby told C.J., and they're going to be down in a bit. You should get some sleep. I'll stay here and watch Josh."

"Leo, I don't--"

"Donna."

She hung her head, too tired and too worried to argue. "Find me when he wakes up."

"Of course," he assured, patting her on the back as she stood. She bent down and kissed Josh's forehead, giving his hand one last squeeze before vacating the room. Josh eased himself into the chair Donna had been sitting in and leaned back, taking in Josh's full appearance. He was bruised from head to toe, also suffering from an endless about of broken bones and ribs. Leo sat up straight when Josh shifted and moaned in pain, slowly opening his eyes. He blinked, looking at his surroundings before settling his line of vision on Leo.

"Hey," he rasped.

"Hey, kid," Leo whispered. "How're you feeling?"

"It hurts everywhere, Leo."

"I know," Leo replied, struggling to keep his voice even. "Do you remember what happened?"

Josh gave him a small nod. "Vaguely, but…Leo, they said they wanted to see me suffer because I'm Jewish, and…God, it hurts everywhere!"

Leo felt his temper being to rise. It killed him to see tears running down Josh's face. "Those sons of bitches."

"Leo--"

"We'll get them, Josh. I swear to you, we'll get them."

"Who knows?"

Leo wrinkled his forehead in confusing, taking a full minute to understand what Josh was asking. "The President, Donna, Toby, C.J., Margaret, Charlie…Sam's coming in from California ."

"Why?"

"Because he cares about you."

"I'm glad he's going to be here."

"I know. Listen, this probably isn't the place to do it, but I want to apologize."

"Apologize for what?"

"I've been hard on you these past few weeks. Too hard on you."

"No, Leo, I…I screwed up with Carrick, and--"

"We've all screwed up with something. I shouldn't have taken away your responsibilities because you made a mistake. I should have trusted you."

Josh paused before nodding. "Thank you."

"Yeah, well, I guess we shouldn't worry about it now, huh?"

Josh gave Leo a half-smile, showing off one of his famous dimples. "Yeah."

"You should catch up on your sleep while you've got the chance. You've been looking pretty worn-out lately."

"I've been a little stressed out," Josh admitted, quickly adding, "which is no one's fault but my own."

Leo chucked. "You really should rest, Josh. We're not going to let you come back to work before you're ready."

"You mean you're going to be careful this time. Just in case I take a liking to any windows."

"That's not what I meant."

" I know. I'm sorry." The men sat in silence for a few minutes before Josh spoke again. "Leo, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"What if the PTSD…you know…shows up again?"

"Josh--"

"I mean, what if I let it go out of control?"

"That won't happen. We'll help you manage it."

"My nightmares have started again," Josh quickly blurted.

Leo blinked. "When?"

"After the thing with Carrick. When I realized I'm a liability to the Presidency."

"That is not true."

"Well, then how long will it be until I become a liability, Leo?" Josh exclaimed. "How far is too far? How much can you take before you fire me? I'm on the borderline here, and we both know it!"

Leo sat in shock from Josh's outburst. "The nightmares are about Rosslyn?" he asked, sidetracking.

Josh let out a deep breath, wincing at the pain in his ribs. "Yeah, they're about Rosslyn. And the fire."

Leo raised an eyebrow. "You're dreaming about Joanie?"

Josh focused on a sign above Leo's head and nodded. Leo grasped Josh's hand.

"We'll get through this together, Josh. We're all going to be here to help you."

"I appreciate that."

Leo gave him a short shod. He stood up, brushed Josh's hair back and kissed the younger man's head. "Now, you rest. I'm going to go check up on a few things, but I'll be back later, alright?"

"Okay," Josh agreed, stifling a yawn.

Leo smiled and started toward the door. He paused and turned his head, locking eyes with Josh. "You'll never be a liability. Not as long as I'm around," he said before exiting the room.