Author: Erika
E-mail:
Title: Back Into Oblivion
Characters: Josh, Donna, Ryan, Sam
Category: Angst
Pairing: Josh/Sam friendship
Rating: PG-13

Spoilers: Just to be safe, let's say all the seasons, but especially ITSOTG (I & II), Noel, and Disaster Relief
Summary: What happens when Josh is pushed over the edge?

Notes: I've had this story floating around in my mind now. Also, I just love the Josh angst. I decided to bring Sam into the story because of the brief mention of our beloved former Deputy of Communications.

Notes #2: To anyone who actually read this story back in '03, I'm so sorry to have left you hanging. After talking to my buddy Eliza about writing fan fiction again, I decided to get my act together and type out what I had written down.

Disclaimer: Josh is mine! All mine! And so is Bradley! sigh It was all just a dream.

WHITE HOUSE PRESS ROOM
SUNDAY, 7:30 A.M.

The normal hustle and bustle of the press room was now deafening to C.J.'s ears. She took her place at the podium and cleared her throat. "Can I have your attention, please? Thank you. By now, I'm sure all of you have heard about Joshua Lyman's attack last night. I do not know all the details as of yet, but I can assure you that as soon as I do, you will be informed with what is necessary." That'll make them happy to hear.
"C.J.!" came the shouts of the reporters, all of them trying to speak over each other.
"Do you know how it happened?"
"Can you tell us who's responsible?"
"How badly has he been injured?"
C.J. rolled her eyes. "Guys, when I say I don't know the details, it means I don't know the details."
"What about--"
"Stop! People!" C.J. shouted. The shouts of the reporters gradually faded. "Josh's attack was a surprise to all of us. I don't know how it happened, or who did it, but when I found out, you'll know about it!" C.J. stared out at the reporters, challenging them to question her. "Okay, then. Now, here's what else I have for you..."

GW HOSPITAL
SUNDAY, 10:57 A.M.

Sam Seaborne rushed through the doors of GW, suitcases in hand, feeling an odd sense of déjà vu. He ran to the receptionist's desk. "Excuse me," he panted, "I need to know where Joshua Lyman's room is."

"I'm sorry, sir," the receptionist, whose name tag dubbed her Tina, said kindly, "but I'm afraid that information is for family only."
"Listen, uh...Tina," Sam said, causing the receptionist to raise an eyebrow, "this is really important, and I..."
"Family only," Tina replied curtly. "Are you family?"
Sam bit his lip. "I'm his brother," he blurted, wincing to himself. "Does that count?"
"Oh!" Tina exclaimed sheepishly. "Well, yes, of course..." She quickly typed something into the computer. "Mr. Lyman is in the ICU, room 456."
"Thank you," Sam said gratefully. "Oh, and I'm sorry to ask, but do you think it would be possible for you to watch my bags for me?"
Tina smiled. "That'll be fine, I'll put them behind the desk." She stood and took the bags as Sam handed them to her. She glanced down and happened to catch a glimpse of the tags. "Don't worry," she said, biting back a laugh, "I will take very good care of these, Mr. Seaborne."
"Thank you so much," Sam said. He stopped and looked guiltily at the receptionist, realizing his mistake. "Listen, I'm sorry I lied, but..." Tina waved her hand, but Sam continued, "See, Josh is my brother. Except, you know, without the whole blood relation thing."
"Go on, then," Tina said with a smile.
"Thank you," Sam said again, racing toward the elevator.

By the time he reached the ICU floor, Sam was walking considerably slower. It seemed like ages before he finally arrived at room 456. He took a deep breath and pushed open the door. He thought he felt his heart stop briefly at the sight before him.

Toby pushed away from the wall. "Sam, you're here!"
"Yeah," Sam replied, not sure what else to say. Donna stirred from her place next to Josh's bed.
"Sam?" she asked, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.
"Yeah," Sam repeated. Donna smiled and stood to hug her friend.
"I'm so glad you're here. How are you?"
"I've been better." He felt Donna tense and immediately regretted his comment. He nodded toward Josh. "Please tell me he looks worse than he feels."
"Highly doubtful," Toby answered."
"Hey," Donna said softly, touching Sam's shoulder, "We'll step out for awhile, okay? He's been waking up every couple of hours, so..."
"Thanks, I'd appreciate that," Sam replied. When Donna and Toby left the room, Sam occupied the blonde's seat. He stared at his best friend for a few minutes, afraid that if he moved, Josh would be disturbed.
"You just going to sit there?" a groggy voice asked.
"Josh!" Sam exclaimed as the older man opened his eyes. "How long have you been awake?"
"Since you got here," Josh admitted. "It's so good to..." He paused to cough. "So good to see you."
"You need some water?" Sam asked, concerned.
"No, I'm fine."
"Yeah, you look great."
"Don't I always?"
Sam smirked. "If that's what you want to hear, sure." A moment of silence passed between the two.
"You didn't have to come," Josh said quietly.
"Of course I did."
"I mean, I don't want you to feel like you have to stay."
"You want me to leave?" Sam challenged.
"No," Josh whispered.
"Then shut up," Sam whispered back, gripping Josh's hand. "I want to be here, okay? And I'm going to be here to take of you."
"I'm not a baby," Josh grumbled, though he barely matched Sam's grip.
"There's the Josh I know." Another few silent moments passed until Josh let out a small gasp. Sam panicked. "Josh? What's wrong?" Josh tried to shake his head, but quickly decided that it hurt too much. "Josh?"
"It's fine," Josh lied. "It'll pass." He groaned as the pain intensified.
"Should I get someone?"
"No," Josh said. He lifted his free hand and motioned toward a machine to his left. "The thing...it's on a timer."
Sam glanced up and saw the morphine drip. "There's five minutes left."
"Yeah."
"Josh..."
"Don't worry about it, I'm fine."
"Just breathe."
"This isn't Lamaze class, Sam."
"Whatever, just relax."
"You relax!"
"I am!" Sam argued, his voice going high in pitch. Josh gave a wheezing laugh.
"Okay." He bit down on his lip, trying to keep his mind off the sweat falling down his face. "Sam?"
"Yeah?"
"Can you talk?"
"Talk?" Sam asked, puzzled. "About what?"
"I don't know, I just...Can you just talk about something?"
Sam realized what Josh meant. "Oh, uh...yeah, well, let's see...Remember the first time we met? It was in '88, and I was getting coffee from some cafe, and I turn around, and you came out of nowhere. Do you remember? We just collided, and we spilled coffee all over each other." Josh smiled at the memory. "I remember I was so pissed off because I was having a really bad morning, and we just started yelling at each other. We got kicked out for that!"
"I remember," Josh said, closing his eyes in anticipation.
"You've only got a couple minutes, Josh."
"Keep talking."
"Okay, well, we finally calmed down and managed to apologize to each other. You offered to buy me a new cup of coffee from a place across the street, and we ended up talking in that restaurant for three hours. You mentioned that your landlord was kicking you out of your apartment, and my roommate had moved out earlier that week, so..."
"Why'd you let me take it?"
"Hmm?"
"We didn't even know each other."
Sam shrugged. "It just seemed right."
"If only you had told me how small it was..."
"You would have moved in anyway," Sam laughed. "God, Josh, when I think about those days..."
"I know," Josh agreed. "I feel the same way." At that moment, the timer's alarm went off, and Josh visibly relaxed. "I'm sorry, Sam, I'm just so tired..."
"It's okay, Josh, just rest. I'm here." He released Josh's hand from his and sat back in his chair, realizing how exhausted the last ten minutes had made him. "I'm here," he repeated out loud, just before dropping his head and falling asleep.

OVAL OFFICE
SUNDAY, 12:33 P.M.

Jed Bartlet sat frozen at his desk, pen in hand, unable to concentrate on his work. It wasn't until Leo opened his door to the Oval Office that the President moved. Gladly forgetting the various papers he was supposed to be signing, Jed tossed his pen aside. "Any updates on Josh?" he asked.
"He wakes up every now and then, but only from the pain," Leo replied grimly.
"Leo, you look about twenty years older than you did yesterday."
"Thank you, sir," Leo deadpanned.
"And you really don't need it," Jed continued.
"Sir."
Jed motioned to the folder in Leo's in hand. "You got something for me?"
Leo shook his head. "No, sir. These are get well cards from people around the West Wing."
"I see," Jed replied with a nod. He sighed.
"Mr. President? Are you alright, sir?"
"This shouldn't have happened, Leo."
"No, sir."
"We couldn't have done anything to stop it."
"No, sir."
"That's what kills me."
"I know."
"Do we have any idea who did this yet?"
"Well, we've assumed that it's a hate group."
"Which leaves how many possibilities?" the President snapped.
"Sir..." Leo was cut off when the President slammed his fist onto his desk.
"We need to get these guys, Leo!" Jed shouted.
"We will," Leo assured.
"They should be put away for the rest of their lives."
"Yes."
"What if it happens again?"
"Secret Service is keeping tight watch on Josh's neighborhood. We won't let it happen again."
"Josh won't like that."
"I don't disagree."
"He's too damn stubborn."
"It's the Lyman way, sir," Leo replied, allowing himself a small smile.
Jed nodded slowly and exhaled. "Is Sam here yet?" he asked, abruptly changing the subject.
"He got in this morning. He's at the hospital right now."
"Good, good," Jed murmured.
Leo looked his friend over. "He'll be fine, sir."
"He's a strong kid," Jed agreed.
"He is."
"Josh is walking a fine line, Leo. How much more can he really take?"
"He's taken a lot so far."
"That's my point."
Leo shifted uncomfortably. "Sir, I'm going to go over to the hospital for awhile, if you don't need me. I need to give these cards to Josh."
"Tell him I said hello."
"Yes, sir," Leo replied. He turned and left the Oval Office, leaving Jed alone with his thoughts.