Chapter 4: Shoes, shoes, and more shoes
High school was becoming even more terrible!
There was so much homework to do, the teachers were evil, Rika and Chiharu had left Sakura and Tomoyo for Hina's fan club and Sakura and Tomoyo's worst nightmares had come true!! Syaoran and Eriol were drooling over Hina!
"I'm going to do a Battle Royale (oh yeh, by the way, Battle Royale is a movie and if you don't know anything about it, you should go on the net to find out), on that hideous bitch (Hina), if she even touches my Syaoran!" Sakura told Tomoyo at lunchtime.
"If she thinks she's so popular! I'll show her popular!" continued Sakura in an evil tone.
Madison blinked, but then asked quietly, "Hey Saku, I know you've had a hard day, so do you want to...do it with me?"
"Sorry Tomoyo, I'm not in the mood to do it with you today. Maybe we'll go have some fun some other time," murmured Sakura sulking.
(Sakura's mobile rings a polyphonic ring tone)
Just do it! Just do it! Bump! Bump! Bump! Thump! Thump Thump! Bonk! Bonk!
Bonk!
"Nice polyphonic ring tone Saku!" Tomoyo laughed. "Can you send it to my mobile?" continued Tomoyo.
"Yeh sure, oh... it's my Dad!" Sakura whispered to Tomoyo as she answered her phone.
"Hello Sakura, it's Dad here. I just want to tell you that I'll be picking you up after school today because Touya...Touya...well, Touya ran away," Sakura's Father said sadly.
"Well Daddy, I haven't seen Julian at all today at High school. So there could be a chance he ran off with Touya so they can do 'you know what," Sakura replied and pretended o be concerned.
"Sakura, could you be a good girl and tell me Julian's phone number so I can inform his parents and the police?'' Mr Kinomoto asked, (that's Sakura's Dad).
"Anything for you daddy! Just wait a second. Ummmmmmmm his number is 9472 3228, I'll repeat it again 9472 3228," Sakura smiled quietly as she repeated the numbers.
"Is something wrong Saku?" asked Tomoyo.
"Shhhh! I might be able to do it with you today because I'm so happy right now!" whispered Sakura hoping that her father wouldn't hear.
"9472 3228," Mr Kinomoto repeated.
"Right Daddy! Need any more numbers? The police number is 911,"
Sakura added sarcastically.
"Very funny!" Mr Kinomoto faked a laugh.
"Just trying to make you happy Daddy! I know you must be feeling
terrible right now. I mean Touya is my only brother and I would do anything to bring him
back. I would die for him! COUGH! I would give him all my money that I
could buy clothes just to put up missing signs," Sakura cried, faking the crying
sounds.
"I would too Sakura. I would too," Mr Kinomoto sighed and started
crying too. (Real tears).
"Oh, by the way, Daddy, you don't need to pick me up because I will be
doing it with Tomoyo!" Sakura said excitedly as if she owned every Valentino
dress in the world.
"Doing it?" asked Mr Kinomoto blankly.
"Yeah! Doing it! Having fun with Tomoyo!" squealed Sakura.
"B-but...b-b-ut..." stuttered Mt Kinomoto.
"Is something wrong Daddy? If you're afraid, Tomoyo's got protection
for us," Sakura said confusingly.
"B-b-ut...b-but..." continued Mr Kinomoto.
"But what? What butt? WHAT BUTT! Whose butt? You're butt? Look Daddy,
I know you've gone mental about Touya running away if a fag, but I won't run
off! Tomoyo will be coming with me every step of the way! Jesus Christ Daddy! I've
been doing it with Tomoyo every since I was born! It's not my first time! If you're
still insane about it then I can asked Syaoran to come as well so we can go together as a
threesome plus the protection. Okay? Is that good enough for you Daddy? Sakura
shouted.
"Sakura! What is wrong with you? A threesome? I've got what
protection? What the hell are you blabbering on about?" Tomoyo questioned
impatiently.
"Excuse me Tomoyo, I'm talking with my Dad right now and I would
really appreciate it if you don't fucking interrupt!" Sakura snapped.
"Fine then! Be a bitch!" Tomoyo yelled back.
"SAKURA! ARE YOU THERE, BECAUSE IF YOU ARE, LISTEN TO WHAT I'VE GOT TO SAY!! I've raised you and Touya up, and for what since your mother died? By
having a lesbian and a gay in our HOUSE? AND NOW YOU ARE INCLUDING A THREESOME WITH TOMOYO AND SYAORAN? GOD, I FEEL LIKE COMMITING SUICIDE RIGHT HERE AND NOW! Mr Kinomoto shouted so loud that Tomoyo could hear every single word very clearly.
"Daddy, how could you say that? I'm not a lesbian! I have a
boyfriend!" Sakura answered back, awestruck by her dad's tone of voice.
"Don't lie to me missy! I know what I heard! You said you were going to have fun with Tomoyo...and that you, her and Syaoran were going to have a threesome together... including protection!" Mr Kinmomoto retorted.
"YOU KNOW WHAT?" Sakura shouted back this time shocking Mr Kinomoto and the other people that were close to her. Her volume was ten times worse!
"I THOUGHT YOU WERE SANE ABOUT ME, TOMOYO, AND SYAORAN GOING TO THE MALL, SHOPPING FOR SHOES, OR IN OTHER WORDS 'DOING IT,' BUT NO, YOU PRESUMED I WAS GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH THEM! AND IF YOU WERE THINKING THE PROTECTION WAS A CONDOM, YOU'RE WRONG! IT WAS PEPPER SPRAY! DUURRRR! AND I WAS ALSO ASKING SYAORAN TO COME AND PROTECT US, NOT JOIN US IN HAVING SEX! I'M STILL A VIRGIN YOU KNOW!" Sakura yelled angrily.
"Sakura, I-I'm s-so s-so-r-ry...I..." Mr Kinomoto stuttered pleadingly but was interrupted by Sakura's triumphant final yell in to her phone.
"SHUT UP DAD! I AM NEVER GOING TO SPEAK TO YOU EVER AGAIN! AND YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M GOING TO MOVE INTO TOMOYO'S HOUSE SO I CAN NEVER EVEN SEE YOUR FACE EVER AGAIN!" Sakura roared and chucked her phone onto the hard concrete, smashing it into smithereens.
"Sakura! I wanted the 'Just Do it,' ring tone! Now you can't send it to me coz' your phone is all in tiny little bits! Gees...and can you care to explain what you were shouting at your father for?" Tomoyo asked half yelling and half talking normally.
"If you really want to know Tomoyo, my dad thought that 'doing it' with you meant 'doing it' with you! Sakura said, much more composed.
"Errrrrr...I don't get what you mean..." Tomoyo said hesitantly, predicting Sakura was going to shout again.
"He thought that you and I were going to 'do it' with Syaoran!" Sakura said losing her impatience.
"He thought that we were going to go buy shoes with Syaoran? Well duurrr! Your dad is so slow at getting things!" Tomoyo laughed.
"NO! YOU"RE SLOW! My dad thought we were going to have a threesome with Syaoran! FOR FUCKS SAKE TOMOYO! There are TWO types of 'doing it' you know! Having sex and doing something like buying shoes for instance!" Sakura bellowed once again.
"Sorry. No offence, but you didn't have to speak to me with that tone of voice! I thought we were going to shop for shoes already, Gucci is having a 10% off sale and I was scared that all the shoes would be sold out!" Tomoyo cried to Sakura in a you-bitch tone of voice.
"YOU STUPID BITCH! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME EARLIER? QUICKLY! CALL THE LIMO!" Sakura screamed loudly as she slapped Tomoyo across the face.
"What about Syaoran? And the Gucci store is soooo like far away! We're not going to make it in time!" Tomoyo asked.
"The hell with Syaoran! Shoes are more important!" Sakura replied.
In fifty seconds, a limousine whisked Sakura and Tomoyo to the nearest Gucci store... which was right next door to their school. And there were the shoes. Stacks of them, shelves of them. All calling for Sakura and Tomoyo to swipe them off their places and purchase them all! (mua hah! hah! hah! hah!).
"Oh my god! I haven't been this excited since Gucci became an official company!" Sakura and Tomoyo said at the same time. (Does the line ring a bell?)
"Jinx!" said Tomoyo, but Sakura wasn't standing next to her anymore.
"Saku! Where are you?" Madison called.
"I'm over here Tomoyo!" Sakura replied. She was behind a stack of shelves, and she was trying on a pair of golden stilettos in the store.
"You bitch Sakura! You know that we always start at the front of the store, and then buy as many shoes as we can! You had a head start! You have to buy me a pair when we finish shopping!" Tomoyo shrieked.
"Are you kidding!" yelled Sakura sarcastically, who was already trying on another pair of shoes wasting Tomoyo's shopping time.
"No way! Choose your own pair! If the head start was such a big deal, I'll pay you $1000 (enough to buy one pair) but none of the shoes I've chosen!" continued Sakura.
"You're so unfair!" whined Tomoyo.
"I know!" Sakura said mischievously.
Tomoyo calmly made her way to the pay counter, an idea brewing up in her evil head. Yes, Sakura may be smart and athletic than her, but she was the expert at thinking of evil plans.
Tomoyo stuck up her rude finger behind Sakura's back when she walked past her. Sakura wasn't paying any attention to Tomoyo, (not to mention the price tags on the shoes). Sakura was already trying on her thirtieth pair of shoes. Tomoyo politely rang the counter bell three times. A shop assistant emerged, Tomoyo gasped...it was...
High school was becoming even more terrible!
There was so much homework to do, the teachers were evil, Rika and Chiharu had left Sakura and Tomoyo for Hina's fan club and Sakura and Tomoyo's worst nightmares had come true!! Syaoran and Eriol were drooling over Hina!
"I'm going to do a Battle Royale (oh yeh, by the way, Battle Royale is a movie and if you don't know anything about it, you should go on the net to find out), on that hideous bitch (Hina), if she even touches my Syaoran!" Sakura told Tomoyo at lunchtime.
"If she thinks she's so popular! I'll show her popular!" continued Sakura in an evil tone.
Madison blinked, but then asked quietly, "Hey Saku, I know you've had a hard day, so do you want to...do it with me?"
"Sorry Tomoyo, I'm not in the mood to do it with you today. Maybe we'll go have some fun some other time," murmured Sakura sulking.
(Sakura's mobile rings a polyphonic ring tone)
Just do it! Just do it! Bump! Bump! Bump! Thump! Thump Thump! Bonk! Bonk!
Bonk!
"Nice polyphonic ring tone Saku!" Tomoyo laughed. "Can you send it to my mobile?" continued Tomoyo.
"Yeh sure, oh... it's my Dad!" Sakura whispered to Tomoyo as she answered her phone.
"Hello Sakura, it's Dad here. I just want to tell you that I'll be picking you up after school today because Touya...Touya...well, Touya ran away," Sakura's Father said sadly.
"Well Daddy, I haven't seen Julian at all today at High school. So there could be a chance he ran off with Touya so they can do 'you know what," Sakura replied and pretended o be concerned.
"Sakura, could you be a good girl and tell me Julian's phone number so I can inform his parents and the police?'' Mr Kinomoto asked, (that's Sakura's Dad).
"Anything for you daddy! Just wait a second. Ummmmmmmm his number is 9472 3228, I'll repeat it again 9472 3228," Sakura smiled quietly as she repeated the numbers.
"Is something wrong Saku?" asked Tomoyo.
"Shhhh! I might be able to do it with you today because I'm so happy right now!" whispered Sakura hoping that her father wouldn't hear.
"9472 3228," Mr Kinomoto repeated.
"Right Daddy! Need any more numbers? The police number is 911,"
Sakura added sarcastically.
"Very funny!" Mr Kinomoto faked a laugh.
"Just trying to make you happy Daddy! I know you must be feeling
terrible right now. I mean Touya is my only brother and I would do anything to bring him
back. I would die for him! COUGH! I would give him all my money that I
could buy clothes just to put up missing signs," Sakura cried, faking the crying
sounds.
"I would too Sakura. I would too," Mr Kinomoto sighed and started
crying too. (Real tears).
"Oh, by the way, Daddy, you don't need to pick me up because I will be
doing it with Tomoyo!" Sakura said excitedly as if she owned every Valentino
dress in the world.
"Doing it?" asked Mr Kinomoto blankly.
"Yeah! Doing it! Having fun with Tomoyo!" squealed Sakura.
"B-but...b-b-ut..." stuttered Mt Kinomoto.
"Is something wrong Daddy? If you're afraid, Tomoyo's got protection
for us," Sakura said confusingly.
"B-b-ut...b-but..." continued Mr Kinomoto.
"But what? What butt? WHAT BUTT! Whose butt? You're butt? Look Daddy,
I know you've gone mental about Touya running away if a fag, but I won't run
off! Tomoyo will be coming with me every step of the way! Jesus Christ Daddy! I've
been doing it with Tomoyo every since I was born! It's not my first time! If you're
still insane about it then I can asked Syaoran to come as well so we can go together as a
threesome plus the protection. Okay? Is that good enough for you Daddy? Sakura
shouted.
"Sakura! What is wrong with you? A threesome? I've got what
protection? What the hell are you blabbering on about?" Tomoyo questioned
impatiently.
"Excuse me Tomoyo, I'm talking with my Dad right now and I would
really appreciate it if you don't fucking interrupt!" Sakura snapped.
"Fine then! Be a bitch!" Tomoyo yelled back.
"SAKURA! ARE YOU THERE, BECAUSE IF YOU ARE, LISTEN TO WHAT I'VE GOT TO SAY!! I've raised you and Touya up, and for what since your mother died? By
having a lesbian and a gay in our HOUSE? AND NOW YOU ARE INCLUDING A THREESOME WITH TOMOYO AND SYAORAN? GOD, I FEEL LIKE COMMITING SUICIDE RIGHT HERE AND NOW! Mr Kinomoto shouted so loud that Tomoyo could hear every single word very clearly.
"Daddy, how could you say that? I'm not a lesbian! I have a
boyfriend!" Sakura answered back, awestruck by her dad's tone of voice.
"Don't lie to me missy! I know what I heard! You said you were going to have fun with Tomoyo...and that you, her and Syaoran were going to have a threesome together... including protection!" Mr Kinmomoto retorted.
"YOU KNOW WHAT?" Sakura shouted back this time shocking Mr Kinomoto and the other people that were close to her. Her volume was ten times worse!
"I THOUGHT YOU WERE SANE ABOUT ME, TOMOYO, AND SYAORAN GOING TO THE MALL, SHOPPING FOR SHOES, OR IN OTHER WORDS 'DOING IT,' BUT NO, YOU PRESUMED I WAS GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH THEM! AND IF YOU WERE THINKING THE PROTECTION WAS A CONDOM, YOU'RE WRONG! IT WAS PEPPER SPRAY! DUURRRR! AND I WAS ALSO ASKING SYAORAN TO COME AND PROTECT US, NOT JOIN US IN HAVING SEX! I'M STILL A VIRGIN YOU KNOW!" Sakura yelled angrily.
"Sakura, I-I'm s-so s-so-r-ry...I..." Mr Kinomoto stuttered pleadingly but was interrupted by Sakura's triumphant final yell in to her phone.
"SHUT UP DAD! I AM NEVER GOING TO SPEAK TO YOU EVER AGAIN! AND YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M GOING TO MOVE INTO TOMOYO'S HOUSE SO I CAN NEVER EVEN SEE YOUR FACE EVER AGAIN!" Sakura roared and chucked her phone onto the hard concrete, smashing it into smithereens.
"Sakura! I wanted the 'Just Do it,' ring tone! Now you can't send it to me coz' your phone is all in tiny little bits! Gees...and can you care to explain what you were shouting at your father for?" Tomoyo asked half yelling and half talking normally.
"If you really want to know Tomoyo, my dad thought that 'doing it' with you meant 'doing it' with you! Sakura said, much more composed.
"Errrrrr...I don't get what you mean..." Tomoyo said hesitantly, predicting Sakura was going to shout again.
"He thought that you and I were going to 'do it' with Syaoran!" Sakura said losing her impatience.
"He thought that we were going to go buy shoes with Syaoran? Well duurrr! Your dad is so slow at getting things!" Tomoyo laughed.
"NO! YOU"RE SLOW! My dad thought we were going to have a threesome with Syaoran! FOR FUCKS SAKE TOMOYO! There are TWO types of 'doing it' you know! Having sex and doing something like buying shoes for instance!" Sakura bellowed once again.
"Sorry. No offence, but you didn't have to speak to me with that tone of voice! I thought we were going to shop for shoes already, Gucci is having a 10% off sale and I was scared that all the shoes would be sold out!" Tomoyo cried to Sakura in a you-bitch tone of voice.
"YOU STUPID BITCH! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME EARLIER? QUICKLY! CALL THE LIMO!" Sakura screamed loudly as she slapped Tomoyo across the face.
"What about Syaoran? And the Gucci store is soooo like far away! We're not going to make it in time!" Tomoyo asked.
"The hell with Syaoran! Shoes are more important!" Sakura replied.
In fifty seconds, a limousine whisked Sakura and Tomoyo to the nearest Gucci store... which was right next door to their school. And there were the shoes. Stacks of them, shelves of them. All calling for Sakura and Tomoyo to swipe them off their places and purchase them all! (mua hah! hah! hah! hah!).
"Oh my god! I haven't been this excited since Gucci became an official company!" Sakura and Tomoyo said at the same time. (Does the line ring a bell?)
"Jinx!" said Tomoyo, but Sakura wasn't standing next to her anymore.
"Saku! Where are you?" Madison called.
"I'm over here Tomoyo!" Sakura replied. She was behind a stack of shelves, and she was trying on a pair of golden stilettos in the store.
"You bitch Sakura! You know that we always start at the front of the store, and then buy as many shoes as we can! You had a head start! You have to buy me a pair when we finish shopping!" Tomoyo shrieked.
"Are you kidding!" yelled Sakura sarcastically, who was already trying on another pair of shoes wasting Tomoyo's shopping time.
"No way! Choose your own pair! If the head start was such a big deal, I'll pay you $1000 (enough to buy one pair) but none of the shoes I've chosen!" continued Sakura.
"You're so unfair!" whined Tomoyo.
"I know!" Sakura said mischievously.
Tomoyo calmly made her way to the pay counter, an idea brewing up in her evil head. Yes, Sakura may be smart and athletic than her, but she was the expert at thinking of evil plans.
Tomoyo stuck up her rude finger behind Sakura's back when she walked past her. Sakura wasn't paying any attention to Tomoyo, (not to mention the price tags on the shoes). Sakura was already trying on her thirtieth pair of shoes. Tomoyo politely rang the counter bell three times. A shop assistant emerged, Tomoyo gasped...it was...