Men In Suits
A slightly Quentin Tarantino-inspired Yu Gi Oh! fan fic by Heavens to Bikini Kill
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Seven: Men In Conflict
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I like money. I REALLY like money. And getting ahold of it made me completely giddy (and drunk) the night of the Hiroshima operation. Unfortunately, I really can't remember much of what happened, except for downing a LOT of scotch, and taking a possible sip of sake. (Hate the stuff. Hate it, hate it, hate it.)
The next morning, I was just praying like hell that the whole cliche unpleasant surprise thing wouldn't happen to me.
I woke up in my own apartment (normal), in my own room (checks out fine), and in my own bed (perfectly good) with a mad headache (expected). But the first thing I noticed that was out of whack was that I was completely nude. I do not sleep in the nude, ever.
Then I noticed that a man was lying directly next to me, apparently also nude. Yes, I know that you figured it out already. It was Kaiba.
Damn!
He slept rather peacefully, and a lock of his hair fell right over his eye. No, I didn't brush it away. Instead, I stared. He slept. I stared some more. He continued sleeping.
Then my brain put two and two together and I realized what had probably happened last night (though I couldn't remember a thing). "AUUUUUUUUUGH!"
----
Honda laughed even harder.
Kaiba and I both told him to shut the fuck up.
He only smirked in reply and poured Kaiba a glass of orange juice. "So you seriously don't remember what happened?" He snorted. "But you guys were so damn loud in there, Akito kept pounding on the door, telling you to shut the fuck up."
My eyebrow went to the skies. "What?"
"Yeah," Honda mused, "I think he's all bitter since Sota broke up with him and went out with Hideaki a week later."
I jumped up in surprise, immediately intrigued. "Really? Are you serious? Are they together now --"
Kaiba covered my mouth and pushed me back down to my seat. "It is not relevant."
"Oh, come on!" I whined.
"No. You need to know what happened last night."
"Oh. Yeah...that."
Kaiba nodded to Honda. "I believe he, as a third party, will be the best to explain it."
I rolled my eyes as Honda jumped at the opportunity to embarrass me. "Okay, so you had a lot of scotch. Like, a LOT. Like a shitload of the stuff. Like Akito had bought a warehouse crate of the stuff and you went through half of it. Like --"
Okay, okay, I get the POINT!
"Geez...sorry." He rolled his eyes. "Anyhow, you got really drunk, and Kaiba had quite a bit of sake on his part. You both got to talking, one thing led to another, and suddenly I'm hoisting Yuuki onto Eiri's shoulders so he can take him home and I'm watching you two go to your room."
"Hoisting Yuuki onto Eiri's shoulders?" I asked. "Why? Is he okay?"
"Calm down, inu." Kaiba snorted in pure contempt. "That git is fine. Can you believe that he got sick after two glasses of scotch?"
Honda shook his head disapprovingly. "That man cannot hold his liquor."
I grew very, very irritated. "Yeah yeah yeah, let's move on. What happened then?"
Kaiba downed half of his orange juice in one go. "We fucked. Isn't that obvious?"
"Ergh..." I grumbled. "I think I'm going to be sick."
He simply laughed. "You may not remember anything that happened last night, but I will say this: you were amazing."
I slapped him over the back of his head. "Shut the fuck up, Kaiba. It's not funny."
----
Yuuki didn't think it was that funny either. In fact, he called me later that day sounding a little bit like this:
"Katsuya? Katsuya?! Is that you?!"
I was slightly confused. "What are you going on about? Why wouldn't it be me?"
I heard him let out a sigh of relief. "Good... you're okay."
"What the fuck --"
"Look, I'm coming over there to check the damage, okay?"
"What? Why --" He had already hung up on me. Kaiba had been long gone, and Honda was looking for something to fix for lunch. I walked out of my room and to the kitchen. "Honda, any clue why Yuuki's all paranoid-like?"
He burst into laughter. Again. (Does he just enjoy laughing at me?) "You should have seen Kaiba when you didn't come home from Hideaki's club! He was going to everybody's house! I think he might have had a gun in his car or something..."
My eyes were the size of beach balls. "What?! He WHAT?!"
He snorted. "Oh please. Don't act as if you don't know. They're seriously into you."
"Ohshitohshitohshitohshit..." What? This was scaring/disturbing me. "I'm going to go take a very long shower."
----
I really like long showers. Don't act like you don't know. Nothing in this world is better than standing in complete isolation with beads of hot, relaxing water dropping freely all over your body. [A/N: Don't act like you're not seeing it. XD]
I think I had been staying in there for nearly an hour.
I heard the door open, and I assumed it was Honda, coming to yell at me to get out of the damn shower. "Hey, what do you want?"
No answer.
"Honda?" My voice echoed off the shower walls and came back to me, but it was the only set of waves traveling throughout the enclosure. It creeped me out greatly. Like something out of a bad horror movie. I suddenly felt very vulnerable.
The curtain flew open. In the shower, nobody can hear you scream.
Yuuki burst into laughter. "You scream like a little GIRL!"
"That was not funny," I pouted.
"You know it was."
I raised an eyebrow, suddenly noting Yuuki's state of nudity. "Why are you here, and why are you naked?"
He smirked. "You like it?" He took note of my glare and went to answering the questions. "Sota, Hideaki, and Otogi are here to set up for hacking into another account." He then took note of my disbelief. "Okay...Sota and Hideaki are here to hack, Otogi's here to see if he can get any sloppy seconds."
"He can forget it. What about you?"
His smirk grew. "I just felt rather dirty." He chuckled as he ran his hands through my wet mess of hair. "And we need to clean you up after what Kaiba did to you last night."
I believe that we audibly made Otogi very, very uncomfortable.
----
Yuuki guided me out of the bathroom and back to the kitchen with his arm around my waist, constantly trying to get under my towel and keeping his lips to my neck. [A/N: Yeah yeah yeah, I'm getting down with their bishie selves... shut up...]
My jaw fell to the floor the moment that I saw the state of the kitchen. Sota and Hideaki were flitting about the place, placing wires here and there and everywhere. They had set up at least two laptops (if there were any others, I couldn't see them because they were most likely covered in wires and boxes), and found it imperative that nobody could step anywhere. Yuuki grinned in pure admiration. "Nicely done, guys."
Sota nodded his thanks and Hideaki waved a hand to show that he heard the compliment. Otogi stepped out from behind some boxes and walked up to me. "Hey there, Jou."
I snorted contemptuously and Yuuki glared. "Otogi... go for Honda."
Otogi pouted. "He says he's with Shizuka."
Yuuki subconsciously pulled me closer to his side. "And HE'S with ME." Possessive much?
Otogi glared and backed away, and it was my guess that he had probably heard something about Yuuki's Kaiba-centric death threats. Jesus, who knew that men were so hooked on gossip?
I chose to ignore Otogi for the rest of the afternoon, and I turned to Sota. "What's with all of this gear?"
Sota grinned as he plugged in some obscure wire into some obscure port. "We need all of the equipment that we can get. We have to make sure that our codes are ghosts: invisible and untraceable. If any inspector gets any clue that will lead him even to the most remote wire, we're all Bubba's next cellmates."
Hideaki looked up from the Palm Pilot that he was no doubt playing with. "Jonouchi-san, will you PLEASE put on some goddamn pants, at the very least?"
I struck a pose. "Why? Do I make you uncomfortable?"
Everybody except for Otogi laughed out loud.
[A/N: Uh...I'm back from LA, so my updates will be a lot more consistent. Maybe I'll finish this soon. You know, I've been thinking of a billion different endings... what if Kaiba and Yuuki got together? Ha ha ha. No way, they hate each other too much. (But then Jou and Kaiba shouldn't be together either...) Yeah yeah yeah, it's all the same. The second heist begins next chapter... it won't be very exciting. Sorry. See you next chapter... and review! Damn it! Review!]
A slightly Quentin Tarantino-inspired Yu Gi Oh! fan fic by Heavens to Bikini Kill
--------------
Seven: Men In Conflict
--------------
I like money. I REALLY like money. And getting ahold of it made me completely giddy (and drunk) the night of the Hiroshima operation. Unfortunately, I really can't remember much of what happened, except for downing a LOT of scotch, and taking a possible sip of sake. (Hate the stuff. Hate it, hate it, hate it.)
The next morning, I was just praying like hell that the whole cliche unpleasant surprise thing wouldn't happen to me.
I woke up in my own apartment (normal), in my own room (checks out fine), and in my own bed (perfectly good) with a mad headache (expected). But the first thing I noticed that was out of whack was that I was completely nude. I do not sleep in the nude, ever.
Then I noticed that a man was lying directly next to me, apparently also nude. Yes, I know that you figured it out already. It was Kaiba.
Damn!
He slept rather peacefully, and a lock of his hair fell right over his eye. No, I didn't brush it away. Instead, I stared. He slept. I stared some more. He continued sleeping.
Then my brain put two and two together and I realized what had probably happened last night (though I couldn't remember a thing). "AUUUUUUUUUGH!"
----
Honda laughed even harder.
Kaiba and I both told him to shut the fuck up.
He only smirked in reply and poured Kaiba a glass of orange juice. "So you seriously don't remember what happened?" He snorted. "But you guys were so damn loud in there, Akito kept pounding on the door, telling you to shut the fuck up."
My eyebrow went to the skies. "What?"
"Yeah," Honda mused, "I think he's all bitter since Sota broke up with him and went out with Hideaki a week later."
I jumped up in surprise, immediately intrigued. "Really? Are you serious? Are they together now --"
Kaiba covered my mouth and pushed me back down to my seat. "It is not relevant."
"Oh, come on!" I whined.
"No. You need to know what happened last night."
"Oh. Yeah...that."
Kaiba nodded to Honda. "I believe he, as a third party, will be the best to explain it."
I rolled my eyes as Honda jumped at the opportunity to embarrass me. "Okay, so you had a lot of scotch. Like, a LOT. Like a shitload of the stuff. Like Akito had bought a warehouse crate of the stuff and you went through half of it. Like --"
Okay, okay, I get the POINT!
"Geez...sorry." He rolled his eyes. "Anyhow, you got really drunk, and Kaiba had quite a bit of sake on his part. You both got to talking, one thing led to another, and suddenly I'm hoisting Yuuki onto Eiri's shoulders so he can take him home and I'm watching you two go to your room."
"Hoisting Yuuki onto Eiri's shoulders?" I asked. "Why? Is he okay?"
"Calm down, inu." Kaiba snorted in pure contempt. "That git is fine. Can you believe that he got sick after two glasses of scotch?"
Honda shook his head disapprovingly. "That man cannot hold his liquor."
I grew very, very irritated. "Yeah yeah yeah, let's move on. What happened then?"
Kaiba downed half of his orange juice in one go. "We fucked. Isn't that obvious?"
"Ergh..." I grumbled. "I think I'm going to be sick."
He simply laughed. "You may not remember anything that happened last night, but I will say this: you were amazing."
I slapped him over the back of his head. "Shut the fuck up, Kaiba. It's not funny."
----
Yuuki didn't think it was that funny either. In fact, he called me later that day sounding a little bit like this:
"Katsuya? Katsuya?! Is that you?!"
I was slightly confused. "What are you going on about? Why wouldn't it be me?"
I heard him let out a sigh of relief. "Good... you're okay."
"What the fuck --"
"Look, I'm coming over there to check the damage, okay?"
"What? Why --" He had already hung up on me. Kaiba had been long gone, and Honda was looking for something to fix for lunch. I walked out of my room and to the kitchen. "Honda, any clue why Yuuki's all paranoid-like?"
He burst into laughter. Again. (Does he just enjoy laughing at me?) "You should have seen Kaiba when you didn't come home from Hideaki's club! He was going to everybody's house! I think he might have had a gun in his car or something..."
My eyes were the size of beach balls. "What?! He WHAT?!"
He snorted. "Oh please. Don't act as if you don't know. They're seriously into you."
"Ohshitohshitohshitohshit..." What? This was scaring/disturbing me. "I'm going to go take a very long shower."
----
I really like long showers. Don't act like you don't know. Nothing in this world is better than standing in complete isolation with beads of hot, relaxing water dropping freely all over your body. [A/N: Don't act like you're not seeing it. XD]
I think I had been staying in there for nearly an hour.
I heard the door open, and I assumed it was Honda, coming to yell at me to get out of the damn shower. "Hey, what do you want?"
No answer.
"Honda?" My voice echoed off the shower walls and came back to me, but it was the only set of waves traveling throughout the enclosure. It creeped me out greatly. Like something out of a bad horror movie. I suddenly felt very vulnerable.
The curtain flew open. In the shower, nobody can hear you scream.
Yuuki burst into laughter. "You scream like a little GIRL!"
"That was not funny," I pouted.
"You know it was."
I raised an eyebrow, suddenly noting Yuuki's state of nudity. "Why are you here, and why are you naked?"
He smirked. "You like it?" He took note of my glare and went to answering the questions. "Sota, Hideaki, and Otogi are here to set up for hacking into another account." He then took note of my disbelief. "Okay...Sota and Hideaki are here to hack, Otogi's here to see if he can get any sloppy seconds."
"He can forget it. What about you?"
His smirk grew. "I just felt rather dirty." He chuckled as he ran his hands through my wet mess of hair. "And we need to clean you up after what Kaiba did to you last night."
I believe that we audibly made Otogi very, very uncomfortable.
----
Yuuki guided me out of the bathroom and back to the kitchen with his arm around my waist, constantly trying to get under my towel and keeping his lips to my neck. [A/N: Yeah yeah yeah, I'm getting down with their bishie selves... shut up...]
My jaw fell to the floor the moment that I saw the state of the kitchen. Sota and Hideaki were flitting about the place, placing wires here and there and everywhere. They had set up at least two laptops (if there were any others, I couldn't see them because they were most likely covered in wires and boxes), and found it imperative that nobody could step anywhere. Yuuki grinned in pure admiration. "Nicely done, guys."
Sota nodded his thanks and Hideaki waved a hand to show that he heard the compliment. Otogi stepped out from behind some boxes and walked up to me. "Hey there, Jou."
I snorted contemptuously and Yuuki glared. "Otogi... go for Honda."
Otogi pouted. "He says he's with Shizuka."
Yuuki subconsciously pulled me closer to his side. "And HE'S with ME." Possessive much?
Otogi glared and backed away, and it was my guess that he had probably heard something about Yuuki's Kaiba-centric death threats. Jesus, who knew that men were so hooked on gossip?
I chose to ignore Otogi for the rest of the afternoon, and I turned to Sota. "What's with all of this gear?"
Sota grinned as he plugged in some obscure wire into some obscure port. "We need all of the equipment that we can get. We have to make sure that our codes are ghosts: invisible and untraceable. If any inspector gets any clue that will lead him even to the most remote wire, we're all Bubba's next cellmates."
Hideaki looked up from the Palm Pilot that he was no doubt playing with. "Jonouchi-san, will you PLEASE put on some goddamn pants, at the very least?"
I struck a pose. "Why? Do I make you uncomfortable?"
Everybody except for Otogi laughed out loud.
[A/N: Uh...I'm back from LA, so my updates will be a lot more consistent. Maybe I'll finish this soon. You know, I've been thinking of a billion different endings... what if Kaiba and Yuuki got together? Ha ha ha. No way, they hate each other too much. (But then Jou and Kaiba shouldn't be together either...) Yeah yeah yeah, it's all the same. The second heist begins next chapter... it won't be very exciting. Sorry. See you next chapter... and review! Damn it! Review!]