A/N: I don't own anything, if you didn't remember!

FYI There is a twist I'm using with Snape, and I view him and Lily differently than most people would be willing to do. They've never dated or anything, I'll clear that up right now, but it is different.

I also want you to realize that I do make Sirius look like a real jerk, but that there has to be some reason people think that he would be that rash. His friends understand him, but look at it from an outsider's POV and see what they might use the situation as when justifying him being in Azkaban. That's all I have to say for Sirius acting the was he does.

I hope you like this chapter and please review!

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Sorry I don't have time to write individual messages to any of you right now, but I will next time if you review!!! Thank you for your support and commentary. I appreciate all the help I can get on my writing, because I am trying to get better.

Chapter 8- Talking it over

"What?" Sirius shouted when what James was saying finally sunk in. "Why didn't she tell us?"

Samantha, who's mother was a muggle-born, had understood before James explained to the others what cancer was. "She didn't even tell me, Sirius, don't be so offended," she said distantly.

"Bullocks! Bullocks to it all! I can't believe she'd keep this from us!" Sirius wasn't taking it too well, but didn't bother to stop and think of how it must be effecting everyone else.

"Calm down, Padfoot, it isn't as if this is an easy topic to bring up," Remus attempted to calm his friend.

"I only got it out of Lily because she was vulnerable in the first place, Sirius," James mentioned. "I didn't just ask, and she hadn't told me before."

"FRIENDS DON'T KEEP SECRETS LIKE THIS!" No one knew how to calm him at this point. It was a minute or two before anyone even talked again.

"S-Sirus, I-I think th-that sh-"

"I don't care what you think, Peter! I'm out of here!" Sirius stormed out of the common room leaving a silent group there.

Samantha was still trying to hold back her fears and concerns. "I think I better go study," she said standing up and going up stairs.

"Me too," Remus said. "Tell Lily it'll be okay, and that we hope to see her at dinner."

Remus left, leaving Peter and James alone. "Now I see why Lily didn't want to say anything," James said.

"Don't worry, James, I bet he'll come around," Peter tried to reassure.

"Right," James said sarcastically.

"I-I have to m-meet someone," Peter began stuttering again.

"Alright," James said, not really caring what any of them had to do. "See you around."

"S-see you," Peter went out the portrait hole to 'meet someone'.

By Thursday Lily was feeling like her usual self, at least as usual as things were going to get while she had this. Feeling ill didn't bother her today, there was something much more odd was occurring. Sirius wasn't talking to anyone, and Samantha kept getting the cold shoulder every time she tried to include him in anything. Lily had a feeling about what this dealt with, but was unsure of how to deal with the situation; Lily only knew she had to try.

After a difficult charms lesson that afternoon Lily finally decided to approach Sirius. He had taken to walking around the lake alone, which was an interesting sight since he was always with James. "Hey Black," Lily shouted while drawing near to him.

"What?" Sirius asked bitterly while chucking a rock into the lake.

"Why have you had your knickers in a twist?" Lily asked looking at him with an expression of humorous curiosity.

"Why are you pretending to be just fine?"

"Because right now I am just fine."

"Right," Sirius chucked another rock. "Don't you think I wouldn't have found out all about it once I knew? I do know how to read and I know what happens, I doubt you're fine."

"Whatever it was you read is when it gets into its advanced stages, Sirius. They still think they can get rid of it, and if I say I feel fine, I feel fine."

"Bullocks," Sirius said, still not looking at Lily.

"You don't have to deal with this, Sirius. I never asked you to take the burden on, why do you think I didn't tell you in the first place? I'm sorry if you're angry about it, I really am, but I already have to watch my mother in pain; do you think I want to put my friends through that? Through any of it?"

Sirius sat down, with nothing to say. "Sirius, I don't know how to make this better for you, but right now, I have to make myself better first. Part of that means spending time with my family and doing treatments and telling you what you need to know."

"What else don't we know, that you don't deem important to tell us?" Sirius asked.

"At this point I've told you everything," Lily told him, sitting down to look him straight in the face.

"Why couldn't you tell us?"

"Honestly, Sirius, I just didn't know how to tell you, or how you would take it, which hasn't apparently been very good."

"Don't you trust us?" Sirius finally looked her in the eyes.

"I've told you that's not what it's about," Lily said.

"We wouldn't have told anyone, or teased you. What would you have expected from us?"

"A bit of understanding is all I'm asking, Black, but if that's too much maybe I was right not to tell you," Lily stood up and started making her way back to the castle.

"Evans," Sirius called after her, running to catch up. Lily turned around and waited for him to come up to her. "Evans, I can forgive you if you promise not to keep things from us again."

Lily thought about it. "I promise I'll be more honest with you, if you promise to not do any more pranks on Severus."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Fine," he allowed the compromise, deciding he'd rather know what was going on than have a good laugh. Besides, there was always Malfoy.

Severus Snape had liked Lily for quite some time, possibly longer than James had. No one really knew this, but they had, at one point, been fairly good friends. Lily was good at charms and Snape was good at potions, they would tutor each other and in the mean time, both found a new friend. They didn't tell anyone about this bizarre relationship for obvious reasons. Lily's friends consisted of Gryffindors and, when they weren't complete gits, spent time around the Marauders; Severus's circle of friends included Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle. Their houses didn't exactly believe in unity either.

Lily and Severus, however, got along fairly well. Lily was the only person Severus had told about his father, she was the only one he trusted with that information, but he never did get to tell her how he really felt toward her. It was in his fifth year that Severus recognized how he felt, and tried all year to tell her.

It was after O.W.L.s that Snape decided he would ask Lily on a date, there was one more Hogsmeade visit the Saturday after exams were completed, and that would be the perfect opportunity. If it hadn't been for Potter, he might have actually gotten that date. If Potter hadn't embarrassed him, Lily wouldn't have tried to defend him, and he would have never called her... it didn't matter, it was too late to take it back.

After the incident Severus tried talking to Lily, but she wouldn't, she just would go to her dorm, and not come out, and Severus wasn't sure where he might find the entrance to Gryffindor commons, though he wasn't sure what he'd do if he did know.

It wasn't until the Hogsmeade visit that he was finally able to track Lily down. "Lily?" Severus asked cautiously.

"What?" she turned around, not looking too happy.

"I didn't mean it, I was just angry and, and-"

"And you took it out on me," Lily said, tears welling up in her eyes.

"No, that's not what it was Lily, I just can't have you sticking up for me."

"Why not? Don't think you can handle a mudblood's help?" The tears began to fall as she stated this bitterly.

"Lily please forgive me, I just want to be friends."

"What about the next time you're angry with me, Severus? Will you say it then? I can't keep wondering whether I'll be called that every time you don't like what I say or do, I can't and I won't. I'm sorry, but I'm afraid this is goodbye."

Snape hated himself from that day on, the only satisfaction being that Lily didn't like James any more than she liked him. Never the less, he hated himself. During the last year and a half he wanted to talk to her again, tell her a joke, help her with potions, anything. Anything would be better than the indifference Lily now had toward him. He wanted to make things better, make them like they were before, but he knew he couldn't. Severus had tried to muster the courage to go up to Lily several times, to ask to speak with her, but never was able to do so.

Severus was extremely surprised when he got an unsigned note asking him to meet the mystery person at the lake. He recognized the handwriting and didn't hesitate in making excuses to Lucius about having to go study in the library.

Severus made his way quickly to the lawn and saw Lily, reading a book under the willow tree. "Hey," he said lamely.

"Hi, Severus," Lily said, her tone still a bit cold. "How are you?"

"Fine," he managed.

"I need to reconcile something with you, Severus."

"I've wanted to do this for a long time Lily. I'm still sorry about what I said, I know it's been a long time, but-"

"It's been too long for that, Severus. I still stand by what I said, I can't be good friends with anyone who would even consider using that word."

Snape looked down, feeling dejected again. "I guess I shouldn't have even come."

"It can't be like it used to, I don't know why you would even think that, but I don't want you to hate me."

"I don't hate you, Lily, I never have, and I never will," Severus said, hoping to salvage something with her.

"Me either, Severus. And even though I don't think what you said will ever disappear, I don't want to pretend we're complete strangers either. Can we agree to at least recognize one another again?"

At least this is a step up, Severus thought. "Yeah, I think I'd like that," he said.

"Could I ask you a favor as well?" Lily asked.

"What?"

"Don't antagonize James or Sirius, or Remus for that matter," Lily requested.

"Me? You think I start it? Do you know what they did to me last week?" Severus asked incredulously.

"Yes, and I've already said something about it."

"You what? I thought you weren't going to meddle in my business anymore," Severus started in with tone, but was very careful on word choice.

"I talked to them because they're in my house, and I'm head girl, and they need to know that it's wrong. Do you think anyone else is going to say anything? Do anything? If I don't say anything they won't get caught."

"I can handle my own battles, Lily."

"The battles need to end, Severus. Someday the battles will be much worse if they don't stop now." Lily became very passionate on the topic, but stopped to think about what the point she wanted to get across actually was. "Just don't antagonize them, if you can help it."

"Fine," Severus said, and stormed off. Not exactly how he wanted this to go.