Breathless

Tyrael aka LiangFeng

Also Kooritenshi

Chapter 5: The Fragile

Fragile
She doesn't see her beauty
She tries to get away
Sometimes
It's just that nothing seems worth saving
I can't watch her slip away

I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart…

-Nine Inch Nails, "The Fragile"

 "GOOD HYNE SOMEONE GET A DOCTOR!"

*~*

"Multiple lacerations to the upper forearms and wrists, major blood loss, she's going to need a transfusion!"

*~*

"Rinoa…"

"What? How is she? Is she going to be okay?!"

"You have to know that blood transfusion might not work…she might not make it through the night."

*~*

"I know this is going to be hard to deal with but…"

"No!"

"Rinoa…"

"NO! She has to be okay! She's just got to be okay! She's just GOT TO!"

"Rinoa, you have to deal with that fact that Quistis is going to-"

"How can you say that, Squall? HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?! She's your friend!"

"You need to calm down right now."

"SHE LOVED YOU!"

*~*

"Rinoa? Rinoa!"

Rinoa was shaken awake by the hand that was jostling her shoulder insistently. She lifted her head wearily and blinked open her eyes to regard Selphie with an expectant look.

The petite brunette looked down at her with an equally tired expression. "You were having a nightmare." She explained.

"Oh…thanks." Rinoa gave Selphie a smile that was returned with one of equal emptiness. The usually cheerful brunette turned to walk back to the sofa where she had been sitting with Irvine a moment before.

There wasn't a moment wasted for Irvine, as he rushed to hug Selphie to his side. Selphie didn't seem to mind as she gave in willingly. Rinoa heaved a sigh before sinking back into her chair. The whole situation was troubling and depressing, to say the least. Everyone sat around the room in various locations, all of them secluded in their own sadness and confusion. All with the exception of Zell and Squall, who were suddenly called to an unexpected meeting. No doubt it had something to do with the recent events. The incident was distressing and very disturbing. It shook the Garden and its staff to its very foundations and core.

Quistis had attempted suicide. No one would say it. Everyone was afraid to say it. Suicide was shameful. It shocked them to see one of their own committing something so…heinous. Quistis' self-injuries would no doubt be labeled an accident. An accident. But it wasn't an accident! It wasn't on accident that Quistis felt so depressed she felt she had no way out but death. It wasn't an accident that she slit her wrists. The very thought of the deliberate misinterpretation nearly drove Rinoa into tears of anger. But no, her tears were spent on sorrow.

It didn't help much to any of them when Zell burst into the room, eyes red, and gasping for breath.

"Where is she?!" He demanded.

"Zell…" Rinoa started as she rose to her feet.

"No, dammit! Where's Quistis?!" He yelled again, glancing around to sad faces with vacant eyes. Irvine slipped his hat off to grasp it in his lap as Selphie leaned against Irvine's shoulder for support, her eyes shut tight in a futile attempt to stem the flow of fresh tears.

"Zell, you're upsetting everyone. Please…" Rinoa tried again to become the peacemaker, seeing the damage the hysterical blonde was causing. But she, too, could not deny how it felt having her soul torn to shreds by seeing a man such as Zell express sorrow so freely.

"ANSWER ME!"

There was silence. As if everyone in the room were asking themselves whether it was wise to meet Zell's demands. Rinoa, seeing Irvine and Selphie were too upset to reply, said " She's in the OR. They're trying their best to…"

She could not continue. For at that moment, her body decided it had had enough as her knees promptly gave out beneath her and she sank to the floor, her hand rising to her mouth to stifle the sobs that escaped from her lips.

Irvine rose to his feet, seeing the young girl collapse and was willing to lend a hand but was unable to. He had to, instead, grab Zell from running into the OR and do his best to wrestle him to the ground.

"Let me go!" Zell screamed, tears streaming down his face, his sadness mirroring Irvine's. "I need to find Quisty! I NEED TO FIND HER!"

"Zell please!" Irvine gasped out, trying in vain to hold the blonde still, barely containing his own tears. "Please…you gotta… …"

Selphie was forced to leave the chair and rush to Irvine's aid as she too, tried her best to hold Zell down.

And meanwhile, Rinoa watched on, her mind rushing while her numb body rested paralyzed. They were all suffering, all torn from Quistis' attempt at her own life. It was breaking them down. How could they lose one of their own? How could they lose Quistis?

Were they not loving enough? Were they not supportive enough? What drove her to turn her weapon upon herself? What was killing her so much inside to make her want to kill herself on outside? Did we miss something? What's wrong with us? What did we do wrong?

What did we do wrong?

Rinoa placed a hand on the chair, in which she had been resting in a few minutes earlier, in order to lever herself up onto unstable feet.

I saw the darkness within you…I saw what you were about to do.

With uneasy steps, she staggered towards the figures of Selphie, Zell and Irvine, their forms blurred and misshapen in her tear-clouded eyes.

I could have stopped it…I could have stopped you from…

She was vaguely aware that she now stood in front of the struggling trio. She seemed to know this somewhere in the back of her mind but it was her body that held the control.

Or maybe not.

Plagued by the thoughts that ravaged her mind, her legs gave out once more, landing her in front of Zell, who still was fighting his friends with every ounce of strength left in his body. It awed her to see such determination, such will to be at Quistis' side and it almost put Rinoa to shame that she was not fighting the same fight.

Gingerly, so not to allow Zell the mistake that Rinoa would join the gang-up, she brushed away the tears that stained Zell's face. She did not know what happened or how they got there but soon they were in each other's embrace, Zell with his head pressed to Rinoa's shoulder, sobbing out his grief. Rinoa cradled him in her arms, tucking his head beneath her chin, and closed her eyes to the stinging bitterness that threatened to over come her once more, trying to be strong for both of them.

Forgive me Quistis…Forgive me…