Author's Note: this is the dreaded setup chapter. It wasn't originally
planned that way but for some reason my muse is angry with me. I think its
because it wants me to be writing something else and I promised myself I'd
at least focus on finishing one of my fic's before I did that. Needless to
say, nobody likes an angry muse. So basically, I apologize now if you think
this chapter sucks, I kinda do too...
Oh and as for the disclaimers and stuff... the usual lack of ownership applies.
Part VII – Something To Prove
'Cause I have had something to prove, as long as I've had something that needs improvement. And you know that every time I move, I make a women's movement. Ani DiFranco "Hour Follows Hour"
I'm fumbling with the keys to my car when Josh finally catches up with me.
"DONNA!" he's shouting and the security guards are staring at us. This is not the first time something like this has happened. I am slightly relieved that it will be the last.
I can either face him here, or I can face him at my apartment, because if I drive off right now, I'm sure he will follow. Oh who am I kidding? I want him to follow... but at my own will.
"Donna!" he's still shouting only he sounds... I dunno... defeated? Did I screw up worse than I thought?
He's straining to catch his breath as he approaches me. I've stopped trying to get away. The desperation in his voice cuts like a knife.
I thought that maybe in the past eight years I'd learned some things, but apparently not. Here I am, just as before, running from my problems. Only this time I guess I'm lucky enough to have someone who cares enough to hold me back.
I look up at Josh as he approaches me. Its odd, and I'm probably freaking him out, but I smile. He looks at me for a moment, bewildered.
"What are you doing?" he asks gesturing towards my car, the box of my belongings that I hold in my arms, and me.
I stare at him for a moment, trying to think of something witty to say. Nothing comes.
Its freezing but neither of us seems to notice, or care, as the case may be. Josh's coat hangs open and he drops his backpack, which until this point has been slung on his shoulder. Carefully, I guess as if afraid of my reaction, considering my unusual silence I guess, he approaches me.
"Donna..." this time his voice is soft, pleading with me. All of a sudden the fear that encompassed me in the residence overrides the adrenalin from moments ago and I lose all resolve at the sounds of Josh's voice. I was running before, I will admit to that but not from him, not really. The tone of his voice, I can tell, dictates that he thinks otherwise. There is a lump rising in my throat.
He's searching my eyes for some kind of indication, some clue that he's not completely losing his mind, as his hand comes up to rest on my cheek.
"Georgetown," I breathe softly.
His hand falls. I am SO good at ruining the moment.
"What?" he asks, his face clouding with confusion.
"I couldn't tell the President, I don't want to upset him," I'm shaking my head. "Not today, today's too important," I begin to babble. "I'll give the check back. He thinks I deserve Harvard but Georgetown is just as good. Its closer, I got a full scholarship," I manage a smile, trying to stop Josh from staring at me like I have seven heads. "It's for the best really," I add reaching out to touch him. As soon as Josh has processes it all he's going to be so thrilled, and really, when he finally smiles, I'm going to have a hard time keeping my hands off of him. Now if I can just convince him that going to my places is a better idea so that sometime in the night I can pack for Wisconsin and subsequently Hawaii...
"No," Josh takes a step back and my face falls. This all made sense to me in my head twenty minutes ago. Now, not so much. With his frown I think I may have actually heard my heart break.
"Josh?" I ask meekly, stepping towards him, trying to close the gap that he has created. He shakes his head and he looks disappointed. This is by no means what I had expected.
"Donna..." he sounds weary. "You can't."
"I can," I say grabbing his hand.
He pulls away immediately, and I am more than a little stung. He shakes his head and I can tell that he's sorry. I just don't know what to make of that.
"Harvard Donna," he says softly.
"No," I'm shaking my head more to fight off the tears threatening to spill over, I think, than defy him.
"You can't... I don't..." I can tell that he's struggling for the right words. "Donna..." he wants to touch me, I know he does, but it seems like he won't let himself. "I won't let you," he says finally.
"Let me?" I ask. Okay, now I may be angry. "Last time I checked Josh, you weren't the boss of me."
Wrong choice of words, really.
He opens his mouth but closes it when nothing comes out. Then he tries again.
"You're right," he sighs as he rubs a hand over his face. "Eight years and your absolutely right," he closes his eyes and when he opens them again I can't help but notice that he looks like he's pleading with me. "I can't tell you what to do, but please, I'm asking you... make the right decisions. Don't do this to yourself."
"What if Georgetown is the right decision?" I yell. I'm angry again but I'm not too sure it's at him or me. I abandon my box of things, which I had, up until this point, been holding protectively against my chest, practically letting it fall to the ground so that I can throw my hands up in the air. "What is this Josh? I mean, I thought... has all this... are you trying to pacify me? Is that what this is? The necklace? The trip? The things you say... did..." I'm thisclose to crazy tears. "Don't you want to be with me?" I shout.
Security is totally staring at me. But I'm willing to be money that they've been expecting this for years.
"More than anything in the world," Josh whispers and before I even realize what's going on my back is pressed up against the door of my car and Josh is kissing me, I guess to prove his point. I'm kissing back and security, who knew nothing of our thing a year ago, but knows the trials and tribulations of Josh and Donna, is cheering.
When we finally break for air, Josh is smirking. I'd smack him, wipe that smirk right off his face, if it wasn't so cute. Things may be a little better but I still want to scream.
"I don't want you to resent me," Josh continues to whisper, his lips still merely centimeters from mine.
I shake my head. Haven't I made it abundantly clear in the tenure of our relationship that I could NEVER resent him? Doesn't he know ANYTHING?
"Josh..." I begin but he silences me by placing a soft finger on my lips. Soon his lips replace his finger and it's just so easy to lose myself in the kiss that I do. I could kiss him forever, really I could. I wonder where in the last twenty-four hours it got to be this way?
The kiss ends and this time he steps back. He stars at me a moment, his eyes scanning the length of my body as subconsciously my hand moves to bringing a finger up to glaze over my swollen lips. I watch Josh as he reaches into his backpack, pulls out a small envelope, and hands it to me.
I look down at the envelope, noting my name in small block capital letters on the front. I look up to smile at Josh but find his back to me as he walks away.
"JOSH!" I yell out. What the hell does he think he is doing?
"Read the letter!" he shouts back, before turning a corner and stepping out of sight.
I sigh, gather my things, shiver, finally noticing the chill in the air, and get into my car. I really do need to pack.
!!!
The letter is more a plan of action really. Josh's words instruct me to meet him in Hawaii in ten days where all arrangements have been made; as per the envelope he presented me with earlier in the day. If I had any questions I was to consult the itinerary and just trust him with the rest. I was also instructed by the letter not to contact him unless it was a dire emergency because we'd deal with anything that needed to be dealt with, once we got to paradise. As if being in paradise would smooth things over or something. Yeah... I bet he wrote this letter before the events of our last day in office occurred.
I read the letter again on the plane, and since arriving at my parent's home in Wisconsin, I've read it at the very least, two times more.
By doing so, I have learned that even Josh's tiny, obsessively neat handwriting, an acute contrast to my own messy scrawl, is a reminder of why I love him so much. That, and the fact that there is very little to do here in Wisconsin.
My parents seem pleased to have me back though. I can tell already that my mothers' doting is going to get old, quick. My father seems happy enough, although he's never really been one for small talk and we've avoided anything of any major importance, at least where my life is concerned.
I pathetically find myself wishing that Josh were here. Day five and my mother has finally asked about him. I have yet to tell her about cutting my visit short to join him in Hawaii. I don't even want to know what she's going to think of that.
And ten days after arriving in Wisconsin I'm at the airport again, getting ready to board the plane, wondering if I've really made the right decision. My parents aren't speaking to me; I've spent the past three days staying with my bachelor younger brother, Vincenzo in his sad excuse of an apartment because my parents are convinced that Josh, like Evan – a.k.a Dr. Freeride – is going to ruin my life. They couldn't be more wrong.
My row is called and I get on the plane with s sigh.
Hawaii here I come.
I wonder if the natives are ready for the Josh and Donna saga continued...
Oh and as for the disclaimers and stuff... the usual lack of ownership applies.
Part VII – Something To Prove
'Cause I have had something to prove, as long as I've had something that needs improvement. And you know that every time I move, I make a women's movement. Ani DiFranco "Hour Follows Hour"
I'm fumbling with the keys to my car when Josh finally catches up with me.
"DONNA!" he's shouting and the security guards are staring at us. This is not the first time something like this has happened. I am slightly relieved that it will be the last.
I can either face him here, or I can face him at my apartment, because if I drive off right now, I'm sure he will follow. Oh who am I kidding? I want him to follow... but at my own will.
"Donna!" he's still shouting only he sounds... I dunno... defeated? Did I screw up worse than I thought?
He's straining to catch his breath as he approaches me. I've stopped trying to get away. The desperation in his voice cuts like a knife.
I thought that maybe in the past eight years I'd learned some things, but apparently not. Here I am, just as before, running from my problems. Only this time I guess I'm lucky enough to have someone who cares enough to hold me back.
I look up at Josh as he approaches me. Its odd, and I'm probably freaking him out, but I smile. He looks at me for a moment, bewildered.
"What are you doing?" he asks gesturing towards my car, the box of my belongings that I hold in my arms, and me.
I stare at him for a moment, trying to think of something witty to say. Nothing comes.
Its freezing but neither of us seems to notice, or care, as the case may be. Josh's coat hangs open and he drops his backpack, which until this point has been slung on his shoulder. Carefully, I guess as if afraid of my reaction, considering my unusual silence I guess, he approaches me.
"Donna..." this time his voice is soft, pleading with me. All of a sudden the fear that encompassed me in the residence overrides the adrenalin from moments ago and I lose all resolve at the sounds of Josh's voice. I was running before, I will admit to that but not from him, not really. The tone of his voice, I can tell, dictates that he thinks otherwise. There is a lump rising in my throat.
He's searching my eyes for some kind of indication, some clue that he's not completely losing his mind, as his hand comes up to rest on my cheek.
"Georgetown," I breathe softly.
His hand falls. I am SO good at ruining the moment.
"What?" he asks, his face clouding with confusion.
"I couldn't tell the President, I don't want to upset him," I'm shaking my head. "Not today, today's too important," I begin to babble. "I'll give the check back. He thinks I deserve Harvard but Georgetown is just as good. Its closer, I got a full scholarship," I manage a smile, trying to stop Josh from staring at me like I have seven heads. "It's for the best really," I add reaching out to touch him. As soon as Josh has processes it all he's going to be so thrilled, and really, when he finally smiles, I'm going to have a hard time keeping my hands off of him. Now if I can just convince him that going to my places is a better idea so that sometime in the night I can pack for Wisconsin and subsequently Hawaii...
"No," Josh takes a step back and my face falls. This all made sense to me in my head twenty minutes ago. Now, not so much. With his frown I think I may have actually heard my heart break.
"Josh?" I ask meekly, stepping towards him, trying to close the gap that he has created. He shakes his head and he looks disappointed. This is by no means what I had expected.
"Donna..." he sounds weary. "You can't."
"I can," I say grabbing his hand.
He pulls away immediately, and I am more than a little stung. He shakes his head and I can tell that he's sorry. I just don't know what to make of that.
"Harvard Donna," he says softly.
"No," I'm shaking my head more to fight off the tears threatening to spill over, I think, than defy him.
"You can't... I don't..." I can tell that he's struggling for the right words. "Donna..." he wants to touch me, I know he does, but it seems like he won't let himself. "I won't let you," he says finally.
"Let me?" I ask. Okay, now I may be angry. "Last time I checked Josh, you weren't the boss of me."
Wrong choice of words, really.
He opens his mouth but closes it when nothing comes out. Then he tries again.
"You're right," he sighs as he rubs a hand over his face. "Eight years and your absolutely right," he closes his eyes and when he opens them again I can't help but notice that he looks like he's pleading with me. "I can't tell you what to do, but please, I'm asking you... make the right decisions. Don't do this to yourself."
"What if Georgetown is the right decision?" I yell. I'm angry again but I'm not too sure it's at him or me. I abandon my box of things, which I had, up until this point, been holding protectively against my chest, practically letting it fall to the ground so that I can throw my hands up in the air. "What is this Josh? I mean, I thought... has all this... are you trying to pacify me? Is that what this is? The necklace? The trip? The things you say... did..." I'm thisclose to crazy tears. "Don't you want to be with me?" I shout.
Security is totally staring at me. But I'm willing to be money that they've been expecting this for years.
"More than anything in the world," Josh whispers and before I even realize what's going on my back is pressed up against the door of my car and Josh is kissing me, I guess to prove his point. I'm kissing back and security, who knew nothing of our thing a year ago, but knows the trials and tribulations of Josh and Donna, is cheering.
When we finally break for air, Josh is smirking. I'd smack him, wipe that smirk right off his face, if it wasn't so cute. Things may be a little better but I still want to scream.
"I don't want you to resent me," Josh continues to whisper, his lips still merely centimeters from mine.
I shake my head. Haven't I made it abundantly clear in the tenure of our relationship that I could NEVER resent him? Doesn't he know ANYTHING?
"Josh..." I begin but he silences me by placing a soft finger on my lips. Soon his lips replace his finger and it's just so easy to lose myself in the kiss that I do. I could kiss him forever, really I could. I wonder where in the last twenty-four hours it got to be this way?
The kiss ends and this time he steps back. He stars at me a moment, his eyes scanning the length of my body as subconsciously my hand moves to bringing a finger up to glaze over my swollen lips. I watch Josh as he reaches into his backpack, pulls out a small envelope, and hands it to me.
I look down at the envelope, noting my name in small block capital letters on the front. I look up to smile at Josh but find his back to me as he walks away.
"JOSH!" I yell out. What the hell does he think he is doing?
"Read the letter!" he shouts back, before turning a corner and stepping out of sight.
I sigh, gather my things, shiver, finally noticing the chill in the air, and get into my car. I really do need to pack.
!!!
The letter is more a plan of action really. Josh's words instruct me to meet him in Hawaii in ten days where all arrangements have been made; as per the envelope he presented me with earlier in the day. If I had any questions I was to consult the itinerary and just trust him with the rest. I was also instructed by the letter not to contact him unless it was a dire emergency because we'd deal with anything that needed to be dealt with, once we got to paradise. As if being in paradise would smooth things over or something. Yeah... I bet he wrote this letter before the events of our last day in office occurred.
I read the letter again on the plane, and since arriving at my parent's home in Wisconsin, I've read it at the very least, two times more.
By doing so, I have learned that even Josh's tiny, obsessively neat handwriting, an acute contrast to my own messy scrawl, is a reminder of why I love him so much. That, and the fact that there is very little to do here in Wisconsin.
My parents seem pleased to have me back though. I can tell already that my mothers' doting is going to get old, quick. My father seems happy enough, although he's never really been one for small talk and we've avoided anything of any major importance, at least where my life is concerned.
I pathetically find myself wishing that Josh were here. Day five and my mother has finally asked about him. I have yet to tell her about cutting my visit short to join him in Hawaii. I don't even want to know what she's going to think of that.
And ten days after arriving in Wisconsin I'm at the airport again, getting ready to board the plane, wondering if I've really made the right decision. My parents aren't speaking to me; I've spent the past three days staying with my bachelor younger brother, Vincenzo in his sad excuse of an apartment because my parents are convinced that Josh, like Evan – a.k.a Dr. Freeride – is going to ruin my life. They couldn't be more wrong.
My row is called and I get on the plane with s sigh.
Hawaii here I come.
I wonder if the natives are ready for the Josh and Donna saga continued...