Note: Okay, this one's not one of my favorites. It's a little awkward but I got everything to come out that I wanted to. I know so many people just want to see Summer and Seth together, and while I'm all for writing AU, this isn't supposed to be completely AU. I want this to have been able to happen before The O.C. started. So, obviously, in the end, Summer and Seth can't be together. And damn, I miss Ryan. Usually when I get bored, I can throw in a sweet Ryan and Seth bonding scene, but he's not here. So, I'm probably going to write about two more chapters with them being thirteen, then pick a date in fourteen, fifteen, and end with a chapter probably during the pilot or the day before. You don't have to pretend to understand all that I just said, just know that there's probably going to be five or six more chapters. Thank for listening and please review. Peace and love...
Summer crossed her legs and started picking at her nails again. Lara was standing behind her and she could see her perfectly in the vanity mirror in front of her. She was holding her strapless Badgley Mischka against her breasts and peeking at her ass in the mirror behind her. Summer rolled her eyes. All of Lara's bridesmaids looked like they came straight out of a Victoria Secret catalog with the fake boobs to match. And Summer was just there to make Lara's pookie happy. Neil had insisted on having his daughter in the wedding, so Lara and her friends put up with it. Summer had to fight the temptation to ask them all if they met at a strip club on stage. They certainly looked it. Summer pulled on her headphones and reclined in her chair.
"Why did you steal the matches from the one room motel? Once they gave you answers, now they give you hell. They will never understand. They wonder where did they go wrong. How could you be so selfish? Why can't you get along? And as you pray in your darkness for wings to set you free. You are bound to your silent legacy. You've seen it in the movies, and you've heard it on the street. Craving the affection, your blood is full of heat. They don't listen to your reasons as original as sin. Deny all that you feel, and they will bring you home--"
"Summer, come on. We have to go."
"Lara, god, chill babe." The redhead bridesmaid pulled up her gown and brushed a strand of hair behind her shoulder. They had made Summer take down her hair; the girl with black hair had brushed it for her.
"Sorry. But let's go, Summer."
"All right. All right."
Summer stood up and smoothed out her skirt. She took the white rose and orchid bouquet a blonde, the most abundant hair color, handed her and pushed her hair behind her shoulders. She didn't really want to do this. All the models in their designer gowns and then there was her. The short thirteen year old who had a few extra pounds. At least she had hints of boobs.
The string quartet started playing and the gauze separating them from the hundreds of people pulled apart. Summer searched the crowds, found Marissa, Holly, Luke, Tamara, Brad, Chad, John, and...there he was. Cohen. He was wearing a black jacket and followed his mother's gaze to the girls. His tie was diagonally striped with burgundy and black and his hair was actually combed. And he was looking at her now. And she looked back and raised her eyebrows. He nodded slowly. And then they walked.
The thing about the kind of wedding her father had insisted upon was you stood there forever. The priest or minister or whatever guy actually officiated the ceremony blessed them over and over and Summer couldn't help but let her mind wander to Neil and Tracy's wedding. This one was prettier she decided. But she had wanted that one to work more than she wanted this one too. But Lara looked so goddamn happy. And so did Neil. Vomit.
The ceremony went by without anyone running in to tell them not to do it, so Lara became Mrs. Neil Roberts. Summer's step mother. She was giggling like mad and it annoyed Summer to no end, but she couldn't help but feel something in the pit of her stomach. They looked so happy. Then they took photos and the reception hall and they were kissing each other and laughing and smiling and she couldn't help but smile softly too. She sat at a table alone before Marissa and the rest of them got there and watched them taking pictures. After a while, Neil even gestured her to come and Lara seemed to be too happy to object. So Summer slipped in between them and couldn't help but smile along. She had pictures with just her father, even some with just Lara. And she was grinning in all of them. Not that she wanted to.
Everybody came and they all congratulated her father, step mother, and even Summer on such a lovely service and wished them the best of luck. Marissa ran up to her and hugged her tight. She was wearing a gold dress with black chiffon covering it in patterns of flowers and swirls. Gorgeous. When she pulled away, she had small tears in her eyes.
"Sum, I'm so sorry. I've been bad to you and...I mean, you needed me. So over the next few weeks whenever you want some company, give me a call and I promise I'll come. No matter what."
"It's okay, Coop. Thank you though. Love you."
Marissa smiled and let her tears drop.
"Love you too."
She grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckle before going away with her mom, dad, Kaitlyn, and Luke. Mrs. Cohen even gave her a hug. She looked gorgeous, in a way that only she could. Her hair was straightened and seemed to bounce rays off of her silver dress with a drape neckline. She smiled at Summer and said she looked beautiful. Summer blushed enough and glanced around her as she walked by. Seth was walking closely behind her. He took a look at her dress but kept walking. She sighed as quietly as she could so it didn't sound too dramatic, but put her smile back on for her dad's parents.
There could've easily been five hundred people there. Summer didn't know most of them, but she had seen most of them before. There was Lara's family, who she thankfully had never met; there was her father's family, they mostly liked her; then, there were the noopsies. So many noopsies. She saw the lights go down and her father and his bride go to the center of the dance floor. Her father had gotten Bryan Adams to come through some patient, so Summer started hearing the strands of "Heaven" fading in. Whenever she was at weddings, it was usually the first dance that could make her cry. The tears were already threatening to come. Then, her father slipped his hands to Lara's waist and she leaned her head on his chest, and the tears started to fall.
"Oh, thinking about our younger years. There was only you and me. We were young and wild and free. Now nothing can take you away from me. We've been down that road before. But that's over now. You keep me coming back for more. And baby you're all that I want. When you're lying here in my arms. It's getting hard to believe; we're in heaven. And love is all that I need, and I found it there in your heart. It isn't too hard to see, we're in heaven."
She really was crying. Lara was clutching her father's back just like...well, all the other girls did. And then she felt bad for feeling like that, but those thoughts kept coming back. Just like all the others.
Marissa walked over silently, trying not to bother anyone and sat next to her friend. She was trying to keep up that promise she had given her. She took her hand and nodded. Summer smiled and wiped away her tears gently.
"Honey, it's okay."
Marissa whispered and brushed away a strand of hair from Summer's face. Summer nodded softly, and tried to believe it.
"Oh, once in your life you find someone who will turn your world around. Bring you up when you're feeling down. Yeah, nothing can change what you mean to me. There's a lot I could say, but just hold me now. Cause our love will light the way."
"She doesn't really love him."
"You don't know that, baby."
"It's a pretty educated guess."
"Honey, be happy for them."
"I was."
"It will be okay. If your dad is happy, then, I mean, there's nothing you can really do about it. But wish them luck."
"But she hates me."
"No she doesn't."
"She sure as hell acts like it."
Summer's voice was rising, so Marissa brought a finger up to her lips, so she wouldn't embarrass herself.
"Honey, it's okay."
"Sure."
She looked back at them, and they did look happy. They looked like the perfect couple, besides the face that he looked twenty years older than her. But he was only seven, so it wasn't horrible. But it still just didn't look right. They didn't look comfortable enough together.
After the song was finally over, Lara kissed Neil and sat down next to the few girlfriends she had that weren't dancing. Neil walked over to his daughter and offered her his hand.
"You don't want to dance with Lara?"
"I do. But I want to dance with you too."
She smiled, shook her head, and let him take her hand.
"Rescue me from the mire. Whisper words of desire. Rescue me, darling, rescue me. With your arms open wide, want you here by my side. Come to me, darling, rescue me. When this world's closing in, there's no need to pretend. Set me free, darling, rescue me."
He wrapped his arms around her and she seemed to disappear into his shirt. He smelled like Armani and his shirt was warm. His chin tickled her head as he held her closer against him. And for a second, Lara didn't seem to matter. Or even exist.
"I don't wanna let you go, so I'm standing in your way. I never needed anyone like I'm needing you today. Do I have to say the words? Do I have to tell the truth? Do I have to shout it out? Do I have to say a prayer? Must I prove to you, how good we are together? Do I have to say the words?"
She had heard about father daughter dances being cheesy, but she didn't care what everybody was thinking. She hadn't seen her dad in forever; she hadn't let him hug her even longer. But he seemed to have stayed the same.
"Daddy?"
"Yes?"
"Thank you."
"I didn't do anything."
"For putting up with me."
"Oh. Okay. I love you, princess."
"I love you too."
"Rescue me from despair. Tell me you will be there. Help me please, darling rescue me. Every dream that we share. Every cross that we bear. Can't you see, darling, rescue me. I don't wanna let you go, so I'm standing in your way. I never needed anyone like I'm needing you today."
Out of the corner of her eye, she caught Seth looking at her again. He was leaning back in his chair next to his mother and father. Kirsten had a soft look in her eyes and she was watching Summer dance with her father too. Everyone was making it out to be something of an amazing thing.
After the song ended, Neil kissed his daughter on the cheek and smiled at her. She smiled back up at him and he cupped her cheek.
"You're really growing up into a beautiful young woman."
"Dad..."
"It's true. You're beautiful."
"Thank you."
He smiled one last time and left her in the middle of the dance floor for his bride. She glanced down at her hands and walked off.
She spent most of the songs sitting off with Marissa. Luke had danced with Marissa a few times, and even once with Summer, but the two girls were trying to be best friends again. Summer pushed back on her chair's legs until they pushed off the floor as Lara laughed with her husband to 'Summer of 69.' Marissa was watching her with a sigh on her face.
"Sum, she's going to be better. I mean, she should, right?"
"I dunno. She's always going to be Lara."
"You know every time I hear that name I think of Lana? You know, Turner? I read the diary of her...hairstylist I think, and Lara really reminds me of her."
"Lana Turner?"
"Yeah, Madonna sang about her in 'Vogue.'"
"Hmm."
Jimmy walked over to Marissa and tapped her on the shoulder.
"Sweetie, come on. Dance with me."
Marissa shot a look at Summer who nodded instantly.
"Go ahead. Really."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah."
"Okay. Just one song."
"Have fun, Coop."
Marissa smiled and walked off with her dad as a softer song started playing. Summer recognized it from Robin Hood as she saw Lara clutching her father closer. Lana Turner. Hmm.
Summer stood up and walked out of the room. She wandered around the front hall of the huge reception hall, looking at pictures put up on the wall of couples that had had their receptions there. They all looked so happy. Silently, Summer wondered how many of them had ended in divorce. Or just tears.
"Summer."
She turned her head from a very blonde couple to see Seth leaning in the door to the room full of crooning Bryan Adams.
"Hey."
"Hey."
"Hi."
"Look, uh, I'm sorry I...you know, yelled at you. I was just...I dunno. Upset."
"It's okay."
"I'm really sorry I said those things to you though. I don't have the right to tell you that you don't have real friends. It was..."
"Cohen. It's okay."
"Okay."
"I'm sorry I keep calling you Cohen. Habit."
"It's okay."
"Okay."
"So, um, I dunno, you wanna...dance, or something?"
"Really? With you?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah, sure."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
"Okay."
"Okay."
"You know we used the word okay like ten billion times."
"I know."
"Okay."
"Right."
He smiled, took her hand, and they went back into the room.
"Look into my eyes. You will see, what you mean to me. Search your heart, search your soul. And when you find me there you'll search no more."
If he was scared, somehow he found a way to hide it. He touched her waist and let his hands relax. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in closer. She heard him breathe in as quietly as she could, and she couldn't help the smile that spread to her lips.
"Don't tell me it's not worth trying for. You can't tell me it's not worth dying for. You know it's true, everything I do, I do it for you. Look into your heart, you will find. There's nothing there to hide. Take me as I am, take my life. I would give it all, I would sacrifice."
She should've probably apologized right then. For not telling Marissa she had been talking to him and not acknowledging his existence in school. She told herself it was because she didn't want to hurt the mood and what she was feeling with his warm fingers tickling her waist. But somewhere she knew that it was because she couldn't promise she wouldn't do it again. Because no matter how different she wanted to be from the stereotype and hoe much she wanted to be able to just say screw you to half the people in the room, she fit. She fit in and that was important. She wanted some safety. And right then...it just didn't work. So she kept her mouth shut.
"Don't tell me it's not worth fighting for. I can't help it, there's nothing I want more. You know it's true. Everything I do, I do it for you. There's no love, like your love. And no other, could give more love. There's nowhere, unless you're there. All the time, all the way. Oh, you can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for. I can't help it, there's nothing I want more. I would fight for you; I'd lie for you. Walk the wire for you; yeah, I'd die for you."
She looked up at him; he was still so much taller than she was. His head was bent gently over her shoulder. She looked around her, Luke was smiling at Marissa and she was smiling back; she noticed how they were basically the same height. Tamara and John were dancing too; his hands were almost on her ass. Holly was dancing with Chad, promising Brad that he would get the next dance. These people were her world. She knew them so well, even though most of them knew nothing about her. And then there was Cohen. Seth.
"You know it's true. Everything I do, I do it for you."
He was looking at her now, almost smiling. She glanced around at the people surrounding her, all with their lives that seemed to be all the same. It was her life too. She wasn't supposed to take walks with a boy skateboarding next to her; it was wrong to talk at night on top of a table with a kid sitting on a car. They were still kids and for her...she just didn't do this. She had to forget him.
"Cohen, I-I have to go. T-Thank you for the-the dance."
She slipped away, leaving him in the middle of the floor this time. She went back out of the room and fell against the wall next to the blonde couple. The laughing, blonde couple. Laughing like hell. That was what her father used to say about her mother. She laughed like hell. Like she forgot what was going around her and just laughed because it was all funny. It was all a joke. She was too tired to be serious. But when she had left the year before, there had been no jokes. She promised to call, but she never did. That was when Summer first started to lose her dad. She had been told by her grandmother that she had the same smile as Clarissa. Clarissa with her red hair and gray eyes and smile that her father laughed about. 'It could launch a hundred thousand ships.' He'd grin. Then came Tracy. And-and now Lara. Tracy had slipped her father out of her grasp and taken him into a world of over worked men trying to avoid their homes. And Lara just shopped.
Marissa fell against the wall next to her without a sound. She spoke without turning to look at her.
"Hey."
"Hey."
"So, how-how are you, I guess."
"I've been better."
"Sum, were you...dancing with-with Cohen?"
"Um...yeah."
"Oh."
"Yeah."
"Silent Legacy" written by Melissa Etheridge
"Heaven" written by Bryan Adams and Jim Vallance
"Do I Have To Say the Words" written by Bryan Adams, Robert John Lange, and Jim Vallance
"(Everything I Do) I Do It For You" written by Bryan Adams, Robert John Lange, and Michael Kamen