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The Story Proper: Chapter 1 -- Grumpy Gawain

From the castle wall, Sir Gawain could see the camp and tilting-yard that Sir Murille had set up. Sir Murille had laid siege to Camelot for almost six months now, and almost all of Arthur's knights had been defeated by Sir Murille. "Who now rides against yon Sir Murille?" asked the knight standing beside Gawain.

"Sir Tor. Shut up, Gareth," Gawain said irritably.

His brother took no notice. "Mayhap now the recreant knight shall be defeated?" he asked hopefully.

"Why else would I be watching the fight, dimwit? If some bumbling idiot was out there, would I be watching this?" Gawain snapped, watching Sir Murille and Sir Tor rumble together. "Blast!" he muttered as Tor was tumbled off his horse.

"Methinks it would depend on said knight's identity," said Gareth thoughtfully.

"That was a rhetorical question," said Gawain absently as Sir Murille skillfully parried one of Tor's blows. Gareth, who lacked the mental capacity to understand the word "rhetorical", shut up temporarily. They watched in silence as Sir Murille thrust, parried, thrust, feinted to the left, parried, advanced, swung, twisted, and won. Sir Tor's sword flew off to the right, his helm flew off to the left, and he dropped to his knees in submission. Gawain whistled through his teeth. "Good Gog, this Murille is good!" he said. "He's most likely the best knight in Logres at this time."

"Say not so!" commanded Gareth. "That title belongs to Sir Lancelot du Lac!"

"Calm yourself, Gareth. I meant 'the best knight in the part of Logres around Camelot.' Please excuse my slip," Gawain said sarcastically.

Gareth frowned, but before he could speak, Gawain felt someone tap his shoulder. He jumped, startled, and turned. "Good Gog, Terence, don't creep up on me like that!"

The squire grinned. "Meeting in the Great Hall," he announced. Gawain and Gareth followed him through the winding passages of the castle. Terence, talking rapidly over his shoulder, said, "Apparently King Arthur's had another vision. So all of you Round Table-rs get to have a meeting. Except," he added as an afterthought, "Gaheris. He's in the north."

"Yes, yes, I know that," muttered Gawain. Gareth, mercifully, remained silent.

"And Tor will be in hiding," Terence mused. "Probably Bleoberis as well." Gawain grunted affirmatively and irritably. Terence grinned and launched into a catalogue of knights who were likely to be absent.

"I command silence!" Gareth commanded eventually. Terence shrugged, and the rest of the journey to the Great Hall was accomplished in silence.

.

Gawain, Gareth, and Terence entered the Great Hall. Most of the knights were already there, with the exception of Gaheris, Tor, Bleoberis -- well, all of the knights that Terence had mentioned. Gawain scowled at his squire and slipped into his seat. Terence grinned infuriatingly and took his place behind Gawain.

Arthur looked around at all the present knights. "I don't think anyone else is coming," he said. "All right." He took a deep breath and began. "In a dream, I saw the sky above Camelot and to the south grow dark, but in the north a pale light lingered. A voice said to me, 'Only the knight who has learned honour from a woodcutter shall defeat Sir Murille. And remember this: not by arms alone may a knight be defeated.' Before the dream faded, I saw a damsel and a dwarf ride from the north." He paused. "Does anyone know who the knight may be?"

Gawain groaned faintly, said "Blast!", and dropped his head to rest on the table. "This is not good," he mumbled. This earned him some very strange looks.

"Why not?" Arthur asked suspiciously.

Gawain sighed, said "Blast!" again, sag up and explained. "'s my brother. He learned honour from Jean le Forestier."

"Which brother? Agravaine?" asked Sir Kay.

"No."

"Gareth?"

Gareth, indignant, cried "NO!"

"Gaheris?"

Gawain nodded.

Sir Dinadan laughed scornfully. "Gary? Defeat Sir Murille? The man couldn't even defeat one knight at the last tournament!" Most of the knights nodded agreement.

"Excuse me, sire, may I speak?" asked a soft voice from behind Gawain. Gawain jumped slightly and glared at Terence.

"Yes, of course, Terence," Arthur said.

Terence said, "Sirs, the words in milord King Arthur's dream were 'not by arms alone may a knight be defeated.' Sir Murille might be defeated in a -- a -- an insult contest, or a race, or a battle of wits." He sat back down behind Gawain.

Sir Kay nodded thoughtfully. "Well spoken, squire. But what about the damsel and the dwarf that milord Arthur saw?"

Gawain said sulkily, "Long story. Don't ask."

Sir Griflet looked at Gawain. "What is it that you call Gaheris and his wife? 'The savage damsel and the dwarf'?"

Gawain nodded. "In short, Gary was a dwarf for about two months. Some of you may remember him -- he went by Roger."

Gareth started and stared. "What?"

"'S'truth," Gawain said.

King Pellinore became impatient. "So how're we goin' to get old Gary to Camelot?"

Agravaine, who had been silent, spoke up. "Gawain and Terence can get throuth the camp with little or no trouble...at least, that's what Gary told me."

Gawain looked at Terence, who nodded. "All right," said Gawain, "We'll do it. On the night of the half moon."

"What if it isn't Gary?" Sir Sagramore asked suspiciously.

"It's definitely Gary," said Gawain confidently.