A/N Just as Crossing Jordan doesn't belong to me, neither do the words to Distance by Evan and Jaron. Damn fine song, though. Thanks to Mrs. Rhett Butler for recommending it. ===============================================================
Somehow they all got through the week, even Thanksgiving. Stevie and Nigel were doing great. "At least one couple is having a great time," Woody thought, grudgingly. Things between him and Jordan were at least civil. If nothing else, Jordan was determined to salvage the friendship they used to share. Woody wanted more...much more. He wanted Jordan's heart again. What alarmed him the most was that day by day, he felt that wall between them that she had lowered long ago, begin to resurrect itself, brick by brick. When the time came for him and Nigel to fly back to Boston, it was firmly in place, reinforced stronger than ever. Woody sighed and looked over at Jordan from beneath his lashes. She had no idea how much he really cared and how sorry he was. He had no idea how to start over, either with her or with himself. She said wanted to remain his friend. "How can she just be a friend when all I want to do is hold her and spend the rest of my life with her?" he thought.
Saturday came – their last night in North Carolina. Stevie and Nigel were spending it quietly with Katie. Woody and Jordan were kind of at loose ends. Woody began to pack his things since he and Nigel were flying out early. That done, he and Jordan flopped down on the couch to watch a movie. It was some cops-n-robbers movie...Lethal Weapon 25...or something like that. Woody wasn't real sure and could care less. He was too busy kicking himself. He had hoped to return to Boston with things settled between himself and Jordan. And in a way, he guessed they were settled, just not the way he wanted. But he'd try one more time.
"So you just want to be friends again," he said.
"I think that's best, don't you, given the circumstances?"
"Hmm....are friends allowed to do this?" he pulled Jordan against him, her back against his chest as they lounged on the couch, their leg spread out in front of them.
"Oh damn," Jordan thought. Woody hadn't touched her all week. She was afraid this might happen. She was even more afraid of how her love-starved body would react. It got worse when he wrapped his arms around her waist. Her heart began to pound as her body once again experienced his warm and familiar caresses. But putting his arms around her was as far as he went.
"Well..." he said, waiting for an answer.
"I think this will be okay as long as it's only for watching TV and nothing else."
"Jordan, how do you think I'm going to react if you start seeing someone else?"
Jordan was dumb struck. She hadn't thought of that.
"And how do you think you're going to react if I start seeing someone else?" Woody continued.
Jordan knew what the answer to that was. It wasn't pretty. But instead she replied, "We're adults now Woody. We have to act like them."
Growing more frustrated by the minute, Woody asked, "And what are you going to do if I do this?" And with that he turned Jordan around and kissed her, hard, not caring what she thought. "Damn the consequences," he remembered hazily thinking.
Jordan had been caught off guard and was even more alarmed at her own lips softening and reacting to the onslaught of his mouth. When Woody felt her respond, his lips softened, too, coaxing more out of her. Jordan heard a whimper from somewhere and realized that it came from her throat. Breathless, she tried to break out of the embrace, but Woody was relentless. He kissed her until she was completely caught up with the feeling and with him. It was only then he pulled away. "I think you need to go into your room, now," he said, breathing hard. "Please. Go. Now." His eyes were dark and stormy. For just a fleeting moment, Jordan was frightened. She pulled away from him and nearly ran into her bedroom.
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Woody looked out of the window of the airplane. He was flying back to Boston. No promises had come from Jordan. As a matter of fact, very little was said between the two that morning as she got ready to take him to the airport. What conversation that did go on was stilted and hard. More than once, Woody felt like he had sawdust in his mouth.
Nigel, on the other hand, had had a great week. His send off at the airport was as warm and loving as Woody's was cool and filled with hurt. As the Brit settled in beside Woody, he looked the detective over. "It didn't go well, did it Woody?" asked quietly, taking in his slumped shoulders and dejected attitude.
"No. She said no, Nigel. She said she couldn't consider a relationship with me because I didn't trust her."
Nigel asked, "How many more weeks until Christmas, Woodrow?"
"Not long...maybe two."
"I hope they go by quickly. Stevie and Katie are coming up to Boston to see me and 'some real snow,' as Katie put it."
Woody sighed. "I guess Jordan will be back then, too."
"Actually, mate, no. She's been asked to stay with the NC Medical Examiners Office through spring."
Woody turned his attention back to the window. She hadn't told him that. It was going to be a long winter. An old song filtered its way through his mind.
The sky has lost its color
The sun has turned to gray
At least that's how it feels to me
Whenever you're away
I crawl up in a corner
As I watch the minutes pass
Each one brings me closer to
The time when you'll be back
You're coming back
Woody felt a tear trickle down his cheek. What had he done?
I can't take the distance
I can't take the miles
I can't take the time until the next time I see you smile
I can't take the distance
And I'm not ashamed
That I can't take a breath without seeing your name
I can brave a hurricane
And still be standing tall
When all the dust has settled down
But I can't take the distance
His life would never be the same without her. No matter where he looked, he'd see a pair of honey-brown eyes. No matter who he kissed, he'd see her face. He should have known better than to accuse her of taking that damn envelope.
I still believe in feelings
But sometimes I feel too much
I make believe you're close to me
But it ain't close enough
Not nearly close enough
I can't take the distance
I can't take the miles
I can't take the time until the next time I see you smile
I can't take the distance
And I'm not ashamed
That I can't take a breath without seeing your name
I can brave a hurricane
And still be standing tall
When all the dust has settled down
But I can't take the distance
====================================================
Jordan stood and watched the plane fly off into the cold north sky. She could feel her heart breaking all over again. Trying to swallow the lump in her throat, she drove back to her tiny apartment. Opening the door and entering, she happened to glance over at the couch. There was Woody's Boston PD sweatshirt. She picked it up and put it to her nose. It smelled like him. She hugged it to herself. It wasn't the same as having him there, but it made her feel better.
"Girl, what are you still doing here?" a voice called from the doorway. It was Stevie, sans Katie.
"Oh, I'm just packing up to come back to your place," Jordan shakily replied.
"No. I mean what the hell are you still doing in Durham? You need to get your ass back to Boston."
"Steve...there's nothing for me in Boston now."
"Yeah, right. I saw the way Woody was looking at you. And I saw the way you were looking at him. He trusts you, Jordan. He does. It's written all over his face. Give the man a chance."
Jordan looked at Stevie doubtfully.
"Jordan. Quit being so stubborn. Love, real love, may only come around once in your lifetime. Grab that brass ring when you can. Everything else will work out fine."
"You sound like the voice of experience."
Stevie looked down at her left hand. "I am. And I grabbed the ring," showing her engagement ring to Jordan.
"So Boston is going to get two residents from North Carolina?" Jordan grinned
"Just as soon as Katie finishes kindergarten this year."
Jordan hugged her friend. "I am so happy for you and Nigel. And Katie."
Stevie took Jordan by the shoulders and gently shook her. "Go after him, Jordan. Go. Now. I'll cover for you. I'll tell them you had a family emergency. Just don't make a mistake you'll regret the rest of your life. Don't spend your time caught up in the 'what ifs.' Go for the brass ring."