HI! Thank you to my reviewers, new and old. Spread the word! Tell you
friends of this fanfic! Let them come running over the hilltops and bask in
it's surreal light.
Lets see if I can reach over 50 reviews before I stop writing (We could be
entering the last few chapters..... but there is something new from me on
the way)
A question-how do you do italics? They never show up on the website
version, I do my stories on word docs. Any help would be gratefully
received.
"Welcome to the gallery!" said the chirpy woman.
It was one of those funky shops with startlingly white walls and wannabe intellectuals wearing monocles with fake lenses, sneering at the paintings and going "Ohh! The artist s possibly going through troublesome, angst ridden, turmoil!" before hastily hiding their thesaurus' in their back pockets (they don't call them pocket size for nothing.) Assorted food was served on those tiny silver tables that nothing fits on. A few computers were dotted around. It seemed this shop had a split personality disorder. It was trying to be a cyber café and an art gallery and not succeeding particularly well at either.
Morpheus had entered to check his email (despite a petition, no one at AOL wanted to install broadband into the neb, claiming it was unsafe, for reasons that if I explained, would indecently go beyond the size any bracket should be) and introduce a bit of culture to Neo. Unfortunately Culture changed so fast in the Mall that the paintings had changed six times since they got there.
So they settled down to their tasks, Morpheus checking his email, Trinity drinking a coffee with horribly hard to pronounce name, and Neo staring gormlessly out the window.
Men yielding guns, with dark glasses seem to like to interrupt this sort of occasion, and today was no exception- a bullet hole soon made it's presence very clearly known in Trinity's mug and soon choca mocha locha whata kinda coffea hasa thisa stupida namea (for that was the name of the coffee) was all over the floor.
"This is a hostage situation! Put your hands behind your heads and kneel on the floor!" They did. "Now and try and lick your own elbow!" The guy grinned "Nah, I'm kidding, that's impossible." Despite the fact this guy was threatening to kill them he seemed quite nice.
"Not if you believe" said Neo.
"Yes that's what my father told me," said un- named hostage dude two. "I kept on trying to lick my elbow, but I always failed. On the night of my sixteenth birthday I left forever. Went to hostage person school, and the rest is history!"
Un named hostage dude one (who was not the one who spoke first, that was un-named hostage dude three) turned to Morpheus. " You seem like an intelligent kind of fella!" she said " What's your opinion on the whole elbow licking thing?"
Morpheus paused. "It is one of the rules about the matrix we are taught when we are captains, we swear never to speak of them again, but you're a pretty nice albeit law breaking group of people so I think I'll tell you...
"1. You can lick your own elbow if you......"
"If you what?" asked Trinity
"Well these rules have been taught for thousands of years, you see, and in that time the words on the paper the rules are written on kind of... faded away.
"You mean the entire system we have running here is based on the rules of "You can lick your elbow if you......" asked Trinity.
" Well can you think of a better motto to base your life on? Now, before this interruption I do believe you were holding us hostage, care to carry on?"
"Well if you don't mind."
"Certainly nothing better to do." Neo said cheerfully.
Men yielding guns, with dark glasses seem to like to interrupt this sort of occasion, and today was no exception- a bullet hole soon made it's presence very clearly known in a table leg.
"This is a hostage situation! Put your hands behind your heads and kneel on the floor!"
The funny thing was, the two groups of hostage dudes looked exactly the same. Spooky eh? (No really! SPOOKY!)
"GET DOWN BEFORE I MAKE YOU PUKE YOUR GUTS UP!" said unkind un named hostage dude three.
"Now really there was no need for that!" said Kind un named hostage dude two.
Meanwhile on the floor, The trio were having a conversation. "Lets hurt them!" said Trinity. So they did.
Neo ran up to a hostage dude and preformed some sort of fancy kick type thing. (Hey, we all seen the movie!)"Ouch!" he said.
"Oh sorry Kind un named hostage due one!"
"Hey I'm Kind un named hostage dude two, Moron" Said (A/N why did I start this. WHY?) kind un named hostage dude two. And hit him right back.
"Hmm maybe you should change that name to "Usually kind but aggressive when harmed hostage dude two." Said Neo, for the first time showing some super hero type wit. In this time Trinity and Morpheus had escaped to the door, living a path of unkind un named hostage dudes and usually kind but aggressive when harmed un named hostage dudes.
So they walked to the exit. (well Trinity and Morpheus were already there but...)
"Maybe I'll get another rule added to that piece of paper. Never trust anyone with a complicated name!" said Morpheus. Oh how the other two laughed.
Ok. Please review. Forty third reviewer and onwards win an imaginary hostage dude of there very own. (Not a guarantee.)
"Welcome to the gallery!" said the chirpy woman.
It was one of those funky shops with startlingly white walls and wannabe intellectuals wearing monocles with fake lenses, sneering at the paintings and going "Ohh! The artist s possibly going through troublesome, angst ridden, turmoil!" before hastily hiding their thesaurus' in their back pockets (they don't call them pocket size for nothing.) Assorted food was served on those tiny silver tables that nothing fits on. A few computers were dotted around. It seemed this shop had a split personality disorder. It was trying to be a cyber café and an art gallery and not succeeding particularly well at either.
Morpheus had entered to check his email (despite a petition, no one at AOL wanted to install broadband into the neb, claiming it was unsafe, for reasons that if I explained, would indecently go beyond the size any bracket should be) and introduce a bit of culture to Neo. Unfortunately Culture changed so fast in the Mall that the paintings had changed six times since they got there.
So they settled down to their tasks, Morpheus checking his email, Trinity drinking a coffee with horribly hard to pronounce name, and Neo staring gormlessly out the window.
Men yielding guns, with dark glasses seem to like to interrupt this sort of occasion, and today was no exception- a bullet hole soon made it's presence very clearly known in Trinity's mug and soon choca mocha locha whata kinda coffea hasa thisa stupida namea (for that was the name of the coffee) was all over the floor.
"This is a hostage situation! Put your hands behind your heads and kneel on the floor!" They did. "Now and try and lick your own elbow!" The guy grinned "Nah, I'm kidding, that's impossible." Despite the fact this guy was threatening to kill them he seemed quite nice.
"Not if you believe" said Neo.
"Yes that's what my father told me," said un- named hostage dude two. "I kept on trying to lick my elbow, but I always failed. On the night of my sixteenth birthday I left forever. Went to hostage person school, and the rest is history!"
Un named hostage dude one (who was not the one who spoke first, that was un-named hostage dude three) turned to Morpheus. " You seem like an intelligent kind of fella!" she said " What's your opinion on the whole elbow licking thing?"
Morpheus paused. "It is one of the rules about the matrix we are taught when we are captains, we swear never to speak of them again, but you're a pretty nice albeit law breaking group of people so I think I'll tell you...
"1. You can lick your own elbow if you......"
"If you what?" asked Trinity
"Well these rules have been taught for thousands of years, you see, and in that time the words on the paper the rules are written on kind of... faded away.
"You mean the entire system we have running here is based on the rules of "You can lick your elbow if you......" asked Trinity.
" Well can you think of a better motto to base your life on? Now, before this interruption I do believe you were holding us hostage, care to carry on?"
"Well if you don't mind."
"Certainly nothing better to do." Neo said cheerfully.
Men yielding guns, with dark glasses seem to like to interrupt this sort of occasion, and today was no exception- a bullet hole soon made it's presence very clearly known in a table leg.
"This is a hostage situation! Put your hands behind your heads and kneel on the floor!"
The funny thing was, the two groups of hostage dudes looked exactly the same. Spooky eh? (No really! SPOOKY!)
"GET DOWN BEFORE I MAKE YOU PUKE YOUR GUTS UP!" said unkind un named hostage dude three.
"Now really there was no need for that!" said Kind un named hostage dude two.
Meanwhile on the floor, The trio were having a conversation. "Lets hurt them!" said Trinity. So they did.
Neo ran up to a hostage dude and preformed some sort of fancy kick type thing. (Hey, we all seen the movie!)"Ouch!" he said.
"Oh sorry Kind un named hostage due one!"
"Hey I'm Kind un named hostage dude two, Moron" Said (A/N why did I start this. WHY?) kind un named hostage dude two. And hit him right back.
"Hmm maybe you should change that name to "Usually kind but aggressive when harmed hostage dude two." Said Neo, for the first time showing some super hero type wit. In this time Trinity and Morpheus had escaped to the door, living a path of unkind un named hostage dudes and usually kind but aggressive when harmed un named hostage dudes.
So they walked to the exit. (well Trinity and Morpheus were already there but...)
"Maybe I'll get another rule added to that piece of paper. Never trust anyone with a complicated name!" said Morpheus. Oh how the other two laughed.
Ok. Please review. Forty third reviewer and onwards win an imaginary hostage dude of there very own. (Not a guarantee.)