Chapter 19: Past, Present and Future

Sirius had tried to make the house as comfortable for Hermione as it was for Harry and him. He included as many muggle conveniences as he could. He had a muggle telephone installed so she could call her family and friends. After talking to her mum, and setting up a time for them to come for dinner later in the week, she entered the library to find Sirius standing staring out the window, with one arm wrapped around himself and his other hand lying flat over his heart. She watched for several minutes, noticing how sad he looked. She wondered if he was having second thought about getting married.

Slowly she made her way towards him, but stopped a couple feet away when she saw unshed tears in his eyes and he seemed to be talking quietly to himself. She moved behind and snaked her arms around his waist. Hugging him tightly as she placed small kisses on his back before resting her cheek against his warmth. "Sirius, love, what is it?" She suddenly felt him tense. Five minutes later he still hadn't moved or said anything. Hermione was unsure what to do, should she stay where she was and try to get him to talk or leave him alone and let him come to her. Deciding on the later, she kissed his back again, when she did she saw him lower his chin to his chest. Unwrapping her arms, she stepped back and made her way towards the door. 

"Don't go." It was so soft, she wasn't sure she'd heard him, but when she turned in the doorway to look back he said it again. "Don't go, please." Sirius continued to look out the glass at the garden as if he were watching something or someone. Hermione moved beside him and he wrapped one arm around her. Without looking at her, he said, "I don't deserve to be this happy."

She instantly knew what he was talking about. It wasn't that he had changed his mind about getting married. It was about his history. Every time she thought he was clear of his past, something came back to haunt him. She wasn't sure what it was, but she knew he needed her. She decided to let him make the next move. She knew him well enough to know that when he had it all worked out in his head he would talk to her, but for now all she could do was hold him. Standing there, trying to will all her love to flow through him, she reflected on how hard his life had been and how he did deserved to be happy. He grew up in a family that didn't care about him, who disowned him when he wouldn't conform to their beliefs and values. He never felt like he was loved by anyone other than the Marauders. James seemed to be the only one who could get through to him. He'd been accused of killing his best friend, been put in prison for 12 years, on the run for another 2. Everyone he had ever loved had either left him, or was taken from him in some way or another. Now he had Harry, he'd found he had Grandparents who treasured him, and he had her.

"Why don't you think you deserve to be happy?" she asked watching the spot in the garden that had captivated him.

Sirius sighed heavily, "Look at my life.  I've done nothing but hurt people. I haven't been there for those I loved. If I'd have been a better friend, James and Lily might still be alive, and Harry would have his parents."

"That was not your fault." Hermione finally looked up at him, gently cupping his face in her hands, she felt him relax, not knowing if it was from the contact or exhaustion from the hours he had been standing there. "Sirius, if any one deserves to be happy it's you. You've been dealt a lifetime of bad cards. It's now your turn to be dealt the winning hand." She knew he would understand this, she'd seen him whip Remus at poker. "Besides, you already asked me to marry you so—" she stopped for a minute and kissed him. "—So you're stuck with me."

Both turned in shock when they heard a voice from the doorway say, "You're stuck with me too." There stood Harry with a smug grin on his face. "So why are we telling him he's he stuck with us?" he asked entering the room and flopping in a chair.

"A life time of bad memories coming back to haunt him, that's why." Hermione said as Harry nodded his head in understanding.

Both watched as Sirius stood a few minutes longer than took a seat next to Hermione. "How was your weekend Harry?" He asked truly interested in how things went in the Burrow.

"Nice, the Weasleys are always fun to be around. Ginny and I had some alone time and Ron and I played some Quidditch. So it was a pretty good weekend. How were things here? Anything interesting happen?"

Sirius looked at Hermione. Taking her hand in his he decided it was time to get his feet wet. "Well yeah a couple interesting things did happen." He saw Harry raise an eyebrow. "I'm not sure how you're going to feel about this, but…" Hermione squeezed his hand letting him know, she was there and all would be okay no matter what. "Iaskedhermionetomarrymewouldyoubemybestman?" he blabbed and spoke so fast, no one knew what he had said.

"I didn't catch that could you repeat it, a little slower this time?" Harry asked with a chuckle. He wondered what could be making his Godfather so nervous.

Sirius took a deep breath, "Okay here goes. Last night I asked Hermione to marry me, and she has accepted. I'm going to need a best man.  Would you stand up with me?"

Harry sat up straight. He looked at his godfather then at his friend. He was excited, but he wanted to have some fun with Sirius. Make him sweat a little. "You're kidding right?" he knew the minute the words left his mouth he'd made a mistake asking that question even in teasing. He saw the happiness drain from Hermione's face and tear well up in her eyes. 

Sirius held her hand tighter and stared at his godson. "No I'm not kidding. We had hoped you of all people would be happy for us, but—" He was cut off.

"Stop. Sirius, Hermione, I am happy for you, I really am. I was making a bad joke," he watched as the couple across from him began to breath again. He stood, walked over to them. He pulled Hermione into a bear hug. "Congratulations, Hermione, you deserve all the happiness in the world, and, Sirius, I would be honored to be your best man." The trio talked for over an hour. Sirius and Hermione reassuring Harry that even after they were married, the house would be his home. His safe haven when the world came crashing down. Sirius told them both to be prepared, because eventually the world would crash down on them both.

"There's only one thing Harry. " Hermione said as they were leaving the library to prepare for dinner. "Please don't tell anyone until we've had time to tell my parents, Remus, and Sirius' Grandparents. Not even Ginny, okay? I want to tell her myself when I ask her to be my maid of honor." She knew it would be hard for him, but he agreed.

Sirius and Hermione kept busy for the next few days. He was doing work for the Ministry of Magic; and, she was preparing to take her Auror entrance exam. The night her parents were suppose to come for dinner, Hermione was sitting in the living room in her robe when Sirius arrived home from work. He entered the room, kissing her on top of the head. "How was your day, love?" he asked sitting beside her. He noticed she was lost in her thoughts.

She snuggled into his embrace. "I didn't get much accomplished today. I've spent most of it thinking."

"Want to talk about it?" He asked.

Hermione pulled out of his arms to look at him. "Yes, I need to talk about it. Especially before my parents get here." She saw he was watching her with concern. "What would you say if I told you I'm not sure I want to be an Auror?"

Sirius smiled the most delicious smile she thought she had ever seen. "If you don't want to be an Auror then, baby, don't be an Auror, be whatever you want to be. I only want for you to be happy. Do you have any idea what you would like to do? You know you don't have to work at all.  I'll take care of you." Again he pulled her to him, this time kissing passionately.

Breaking the kiss and laying her head on his chest, Hermione began talking.  "I think I want to teach at Hogwarts. Professor Dumbledore has already told me I could come back this September as an assistant in Care of Magical Creatures until I've passed all the teaching exams. I think I want to do that, I'll be closer to you that way as well."

Sirius smiled to himself. He liked the idea of her being near him, but he wanted her to choose her profession based on what she wanted out of life, not because of him. "Baby, listen to me. I love you, I want you to do what makes you happy and if teaching is what you really want then I'm behind you 100 percent, but make sure you're doing this for you, not for me. If you give up being an Auror for me and it's what you really want, you'll end up resenting me and eventually hating me and I don't think I could handle that."

Once again Hermione pulled back to look him in the eyes. "Sirius, I love you too. I'm doing this for me. I've studied and I've taken both exams. I can always go into Auror training next year if I decide teaching isn't what I want to do forever. I do know right now I want to be with you. Besides I've already sent an owl to your Grandfather and given him my decision on the assistant's position." She again kissed him at the look on his face.

"A woman who know what she wants and goes after it. I like that," he said as he stood and took her hand to help her up. "Your family will be here soon, don't you think we should go get ready?" Together they walked up the stairs and into their separate rooms to change. The pair had decided that until the wedding they wouldn't use the master suite unless it was a special occasion. If they spent the night together, they would do it in one or the other's room.

An hour later after checking on dinner, Hermione made her way into the library to find Sirius standing next to the bar looking over the daily muggle mail. She marveled at how handsome he was. He'd changed into tight black jeans, a white polo shirt leaving the buttons undone and he'd put on his black boots. While his mustache and goatee had been trimmed to perfection, his hair was still damp from his shower. She wasn't sure what he was reading, but whatever it was was making him smile. Walking up to him she kissed his cheek. "Whatcha reading?" He handed her the paper. It was the deed to the house. As she read she saw it had not only his name as owner, but also listed there were, Harry J. Potter and Hermione J. Granger.  She looked up at him, "Sirius, I understand Harry's name on here, but why did you add mine?"

Sirius hugged her close and let out his now famous bark like laugh. "I've told you, I want you to feel like this is your house as well and the best way to do that is for you to be part owner." He took her hand and guided her to the sofa. "This house belongs to the three of us. It's as much yours and Harry's as it is mine. If you don't like any part of it, I want you to feel you can change it. Redecorate as you want."

"Thank you, this is more than I could ever have asked for," she said still looking at the deed to their house.  "For the record, I like the way it's decorated. I don't want to change anything." Hermione rested her head on his shoulder and they talked until the doorbell rang announcing the arrival of her parents and her grandmother. "Well there they are. Why don't you let them in and get them a drink and I'll check to see how dinner is coming?" They stood and parted in the hall. Hermione turning left to go into the kitchen, and Sirius going right to the front door.

Sirius opened the front door to find not only Hermione's parent and Grandmother, but also another gentleman he had never seen before. "Hello, come on in." He escorted them all into the library and motioned for them to have a seat. "Can I get you something to drink?" Once he had what they wanted, he made his way to the bar.

"Sirius, this is my friend, Reginald Wolfforth." Hermione's Grandmother said. "I hope it was okay to include him tonight."

Sirius smiled at the older lady, he'd grown to love her in the small amount of time he'd spent with her. He shook their guest's hand. "Sure it's fine." He handed out the drinks and made his way towards the door. "I'll go find Hermione and let her know you are here." He reentered the room a few minutes later carrying a tray with vegetables and dip on it. "She'll be right in."

No sooner had he said that and sat the tray down than Hermione strolled in with plates and napkins. "Hi." She said as she was bombarded with hugs and kisses from her visitors. Once she had been introduced to her grandmother's guest, she took her seat next to Sirius. "There's something I'd like to talk to all of you about before we start dinner."

"Maybe I should go for a walk in your beautiful garden." Reginald started to get up.

Hermione smiled at him, then at her grandmother. "No it's all right, stay. You are a part of my grandmother's life so you can hear this. It's not bad, actually I think it's wonderful news, and I hope all of you do as well."

"What is it, Honey?" Mr. Granger asked a little concerned.

Hermione looked at Sirius then back to her family. "Okay, well, Sirius has asked me to marry him and I've said yes." She waited for some reaction from their guests. She could see her father taking in the news, and was unsure what anyone's feedback would be, but soon they were all smiling. One by one they all congratulated the couple.

Once the commotion had died down Mrs. Granger asked, "Have you set a date. Decided where you will live, what you're going to do? What about children? Are you two going to make us grandparents?"

Sirius and Hermione both looked a little bewildered at all the questions. Seeing this Hermione's grandmother laughed. "Slow down, dear. Let them answer one question before you drill another one at them.

Everyone laughed and Hermione leaned into Sirius a little more. "I'll answer your questions. No we haven't set a date yet. We wanted to talk to Harry and Mum and Dad before we made any more decisions. We are going to live here. This is the house I've dreamt of and Sirius bought it for us, so this is where we will live. As far as children, I think I can safely say that in the future there will be a child or two. I'm not going to say it will be anytime soon, because we want a little time for ourselves before starting a family." She smiled up at the man sitting next to her. "This next part is the part I'm not sure you are going to like. I've decided to put off Auror training and I'm going to go back to Hogwarts for at least a year as an assistant to the professor teaching Care of Magical Creatures." No one seemed to surprised at this. They all knew she would want to be where Sirius was.

Rest of the evening went well; the topic of all conversation was the house and the wedding plans. Mrs. Granger decided she and Mr. Granger wanted to give them an engagement party. It was decided that that would be fine, but there would be two separate ones. One for muggle friends and one for the magical friends, of course a select few would be invited to both. Hermione smiled as she said good night to her family while wrapped securely in the arms of her future husband. Hopefully now they could forget the past, live in the present and plan for their future. A future together blessed by family and friends.