Title: Gundam Diaries: Part 5 ~ Duo

Author: Makoto Sagara

Pairings: 2+1, 3x4, 5+2

Warnings: Shonen ai, angst, violence, language, confuzzlement, lime

Disclaimers: I don't own Gundam Wing, I only wish I did.  It is owned by Sunrise, Bandai, and a bunch of other evil companies.  Also, I made no money writing this.  No one is nice enough to pay me to read what I write.  Also, this seems to be the longest part to date, due to the massive amounts of dialogue.

March 30th, AC 195…20:00:00

            Ok, so I'm still here.  Heero never kicked in my door to kill me.  I woke up this morning, from my closet I might add, checked my computer (no mission), and slowly walked downstairs.  My stomach was really mad at me for missing dinner last night.  I peeked into every room, and froze when I didn't see Hee-chan in the kitchen.  Only Q-man and Fei where there.

            "Where's Hee-chan and Tro?"

            "Mission.  Two weeks long."  Q said.

            "Man that's gotta suck, Q-bean."  I slumped into a chair and glanced at Fei.  He looked kinda amused. "You sick, Fei?"

            "Nani?"

            "You look like you might smile.  And I KNOW you don't smile, so you gotta be sick or something."

            "Hn, baka, shut up and eat."  He placed a plate in front of me.  Pancakes?  Wu cooked pancakes?  There is something going on here.  I looked at Quatre, and all he did was shrug.

            "Wu-man, why'd ya cook pancakes?"

            "I thought you might enjoy them.  Now eat, before I change my mind and make rice and milk for breakfast."

            "You…"  I stopped.  Wufei had never thought about what I might enjoy.  The rest of his statement kicked in, belatedly.  "Whoa, no need to get crazy, Fei.  Pancakes are the food of Shinigami, not rice.  That's your department."  I dug in and demolished my plate.

            "So," Q-man started conversationally, "are you going to tell me why you missed dinner last night, Duo?"

            "Um…  I'd rather not."  I tried to take interest in the syrup on my plate.

            "Heero was sporting a rather nasty bruise on his face last night.  Do you know why?"

            "No."  I looked up.  That was news to me.  "He…WHAT?"

            "After I sent him to extract you and Wufei from the hangar, he came back up with a black eye.  When I asked him, he said it was nothing.  I could tell he was lying.  So I didn't push him, but I will ask you."

            "I…  I, I didn't do it.  I was way outta Dodge before I could do that."  I said quietly.

            "I did."  Wufei replied icily.

            Q blinked.  "Wufei, you did it?  Why?"

            "He hit Maxwell.  I can't allow that."  He said nonchalantly.

            "Ok.  Duo is that why you missed dinner?"

            "I'd rather not talk about it now, Quat-RE.  I would like to finish breakfast first before you start the third degree."  I did finish it, and walked out of the kitchen as quickly as humanly possible.

             Sitting on the couch later, I thought about the conversation.  Wufei, Mr. I-don't-need-anyone-I-am-fine-working-on-my-own Chang, hit Heero over ME?  It just didn't add up.  Wufei never showed any type of concern over anyone's well being, unless we were seriously injured, and then it was because he was worried about the missions.  I just couldn't come up with an acceptable answer as to why he would do that.

            "Duo?"

            I looked up, and there was Quatre, looking very worried.  "Yeah?"

            "I…  I apologize for questioning you like that at breakfast.  I was out of place."

            "Nah, it's cool."  I gave him one of my famous grins.

            "Good.  May I sit with you?"  I patted the spot next to me, and he sat down.  "I would like to know what occurred between you and Heero, but I won't push you to tell."  He gave me a small smile.

            I thought about it for a moment.  It might help me if I told Q-man, but I had never really thought about talking to anyone about this whole thing.

            "Ok, it's like this.  I'm in love with Heero, and well I was kinda thinking about him while I was in Shini, and I fell asleep listening to some music, and he appeared, and well, to be honest, I thought I was dreaming still. He called me a baka, and I put my arms around his neck and kissed him.  He punched me in the stomach, and that's when I woke up.  I tore outta there like a bat outta hell, and hid in my closet.  I was so afraid that he was going to kill me.  I even locked the door I was so afraid."  I stopped.  I felt a tear fall down my face.  "And, now he hates me.  I just know it.  I went too far, and now my best friend hates me."

            Quatre took a deep breath.  "I don't think Heero hates you, but that really does explain his cryptic message this morning.  'Tell Maxwell it's ok.'  I think he has forgiven you."

            I looked up.  "He…he…he said that?"

            "Yes, and well, I suppose that explains why he had that shiner too.  I'd say Wufei got him GOOD.  I wish I had taken a picture.  He looked really ridiculous."  He started giggling.

            I tried to imagine Hee-chan with a huge shiner, saying "Omae o korosu."  It just didn't hold the same weight.  I started snickering.  "I see what you mean."

            "Now, do you want me to tell you a little secret?  I know I should wait for him to tell you, but I doubt he ever will.  He's too stubborn about this kind of thing."

            I looked up in confusion.  "Huh?  What are you talking about?  A secret?  Who has a secret, besides me?"

            "Wufei."

            "Wu-man has a secret?  Do tell."  I was almost dying to know now.

            "Well, I know this is not my place to tell you, and Trowa would be angry for me telling you, but I suppose what you do with this information is up to you."

            "Spill it.  Stop dragging this out."  I really was dying to find out NOW.

            "He, he's in love with you."

            "Huh?"  Boy, I was really racking up those smart points this morning.

            "He's in love with you.  He has been ever since you convinced him to join us as a team.  I knew that as soon as I met him.  Just like I knew you were in love with Heero when I met you both for the first time."  The blond took a deep breath.  "I was hoping that you would notice on your own, but I see that's like having Heero notice you're in love with him on his own."

            "Whoa, back up the train here!  Wufei, Mr. Silent and deadly, honour-bound till the day I die, is in love with me???  No way this is real!  I must be dreaming still."  I pinched myself.  Nope, not dreaming. SHIT!

            "He is.  But he will never admit it to anyone.  I think he is having trouble admitting it to himself."  Quatre looked at me worriedly.  "Now, Duo, don't do anything stupid.  Wufei would not appreciate any of your little jokes."

            "Q-bean, you don't have to worry about me teasing the poor boy.  I do that enough as it is.  I just think I have a few things to work out.  I'll be in the study for a while."  I stood up and walked outta the room.

            I really had no idea where I was going, until I walked into the kitchen doorway.  Fei was there, washing the dishes.  I looked him over.  He does have a nice bod, and sometimes it's okay to talk to him.  He's quiet, and he likes to read a lot.  He rants about justice and honour.  His favorite line is "It would be dishonourable to fight a weak onna."  He's got his own warped way of thinking, but he never goes back on anything he says he will do.

            I was still silently musing this over, when Fei turned around.

            "Maxwell, is there something wrong?"

            I snapped out of my reverie.  "Um, no.  I was just thinking."
            "About what?  You normally voice everything you think."

            "Why did you punch Heero in the face?"
            "I told you."

            "Bullshit.  Spill it."

            "He… he hit you.  It was not an honourable thing to do."

            "But why?"  I looked at him seriously.

            "Because…because he was acting like a jerk.  THAT'S WHY!"  He brushed past me and walked outside into the yard.

            Well, I got the answer I was looking for, kinda. The only time Fei gets that angry is during battle.  I looked at the sink.  The dishes were only half done.  I walked up and finished them quickly for Wufei.

            I was serious when I said I had never thought about sleeping with him.  It just never occurred to me that he would be interested in other guys.  But then, it never occurred to me that Wufei would be interested in ANYONE, let alone me.

 I thought about all those times where it had just been us.  Like the one time, Une had us locked in an OZ cell, and the air had just about run out.  He sounded like he wanted to say something to me, but I had passed out.  When we got out, all I could think about was seeing Hee-chan again, and being grateful that the God of Death was able to wreck havoc again.

            I guess in some ways, I'm just as single minded as Relena.  Of course, I would never stalk someone and beg him or her to kill me.  That's a bit much.  Ok, that's a LOT much.  Lately though, she has been backing off, and letting us have our privacy.

At least now, she doesn't hunt us all down, and break our cover.  I guess when she got the responsibility of being the Queen of the World she grew up.  I say it was about damn time.  I mean, there is nothing wrong with the girl, besides the fact that she's spoiled to no end, a stalker, and scary sometimes.  Sometimes, she is actually nice.

I walked into the study and looked at all the books.  Q-man has a nice selection.  I looked over at the collection of classics.  Hmm, seems I forgot that the Maguanacs stay at some of the safe houses too.  Arabian Nights seems somewhat appropriate for all the Arabs that stay here.  I picked it up and sat down at the desk, kicking my feet up on the top.

I must have stayed there all morning, because Q came in.  I looked up and saw him peering at me quietly.  "Yes?"

"Lunch time.  Wufei made it."

"Oh, okay.  I'll be there in a few minutes."  I marked the page and stood up.

"Duo, what happened after we talked?  Wufei seems to be fuming over something."

"I asked him why he hit Hee-chan."

"What did he say?"

"He blew up and called him a jerk, then he stomped out of the kitchen."

"Hm…" The small Arab seemed lost in thought.

"What?"

"Nothing.  I'll see you at lunch."  He left me in the study, still standing there.

I had no idea what to think after that.  I mean Q-bean sometimes gets really quiet, but this time he wasn't silent.  He was down right cryptic.  I wanted to know what was up.

I headed towards the kitchen.  Wufei was there, eating wordlessly.  There was another place set and food on the table, but Q was nowhere to be found.

"Where'd Quatre go?"

"TV room.  He said he had some paperwork to do, something about WEI."

"Ah."  That was strange.  He said he'd be in here for lunch.  I sat down and put a bunch of salad and some of the grilled chicken on my plate.  "Fei?"

"My name is..."

"Wu-Fei.  I know."

"What is it, Maxwell?"

"I, I'm sorry that I made you angry this morning."

"I wasn't angry at you.  I was disgusted in myself."  He snorted and resumed eating.

"Why?"

"Because…I have been showing too much emotion lately.  That is something that a warrior does NOT do during a war."

I looked up at him.  He certainly didn't look pleased with something.  I ate a little, and then I jumped from my seat.  I walked over to the other side of the table.  I didn't really have a plan, but when I was standing over the top of Wufei, I just leaned down and kissed him.

"Thank you, Fei," I whispered to him.  I then righted myself, and headed back to the study.  I just was not going to stay there and have him hit me too.

I walked past Quatre in the TV room.

"Finish early?"

"Not hungry right now."  I walked even faster.  I did NOT feel like spilling what I had just done with Fei.  I bolted the door behind me, and picked up my book where I had left off.

I was thoroughly enjoying my book, when a banging on the door interrupted me.

"MAXWELL!  OPEN THIS DOOR!"  Wufei bellowed.  "I WANT TO TALK TO YOU!"

That's a change.  HE wants to TALK to ME?  Hm, I might just have to let him in to talk.  I opened the door, and saw a very red Fei-kun, and a very apprehensive Quatre behind him.

"Well, come on in."  I opened the door a little wider.  "But leave the blond there."  I said with a wink.

He turned.  "Excuse us."  He then shut the door, and looked at me.

"What in the GODS name were you thinking?"

"I wasn't thinking.  I was thanking."

"You…you…you KISSED ME!"

"Shhh…  Do you want Quatre to hear you?"  I hissed.

He sputtered for a moment.  Then he gained his composure.  "Why did you do that, Maxwell?"

"Look, if you want me to call you Wu-Fei, you have to call me Duo."

"Whatever.  Answer the question."

"Because that was a very nice thing you did.  You deserved to be rewarded."

"W-w-what?" Looks like I wasn't the only one having trouble talking today.

"You hit Heero because he hit me.  I think that was a very charming thing to do.  Not to mention, the big shiner you left on his eye."  I sniggered

"Max…  Duo, this is not a laughing matter.  I did not intend for you to kiss me."

Heh, like I planned on it.  "It wasn't as if I planned on kissing you either.  I just did."

He was silent and stern faced.

"Look, Wufei, I'm sorry if I made this uncomfortable for you.  I just wanted to thank you f…"

I was cut off from the rest of what I was going to say by him grabbing me and kissing me back.  Oh, Gods, it was the slowest and sweetest kiss I have ever had.  After my initial shock, I melted into his arms.

I draped my arms around his neck, and slowly slid my tongue over his lips, seeking entrance to his mouth.  Slowly, his lips parted, and the kiss deepened in its urgency and heat.  I wrapped my tongue around his and slowly got into a war over who was in control of it.  He tasted so good.  Like almonds and chicken.  I suppose he hadn't had time to brush his teeth.  Oh, who cares?  He was delicious.

Finally, gasping for air, we parted.  "Wow, Fei, if I had known you could kiss like THAT, I would have done it a while ago."

He snickered.  "Leave it to you to make a joke at a time like this."

"It's not a joke."  I grabbed his head and brought him in for another kiss.

He pulled back from me.  "I wont be used."

"You're not.  Now come here before I jump you."  I pulled him back towards me.

He sighed.  "Maxwell, you are not interested in me like this.  You are using me because of Yuy's actions yesterday.  Please stop."

I LOOKED at him, annoyed now.  "Look, Chang, if I said I wasn't using you, I'm not.  My motto is 'I run and hide, but I never lie.'  And I hold to that.  Now, if you are still interested, I am."  I kissed him deeply again.

He moaned into the kiss, and began moving his hands over my back.  The sound of his moan went straight to my cock.  I was rock hard in seconds.  I almost broke off the kiss when I felt a similar hardness coming from him.  It was my turn to moan as his hard length rubbed against mine.

He broke it off again.  It was really starting to get to me.  I had to pout.  "Fei, why'd ya do that?"

"I will not take advantage of you in your current state."  He started to head out of the room.

"What if I want to take advantage of YOU in your current state?"  I called after him.

"It will not happen.  I'm sorry, Maxwell."  He opened the door and left.

I stormed over to the door.  "DAMN YOU CHANG!"  I screamed at his back, and slammed the door.

I walked back over to the chair, and started crying.  First, I kiss Heero and he punches me.  Then, I kiss Wufei, and he says he wont "take advantage of me."  Well, shit, what if I wanted to be taken advantage of?  Fuck, Fuck, FUCK!  Nothing has been going right this week.

I heard the door creak open slowly.  "Fuck off, Chang!  I don't want to talk to you right now."

"Duo?  It's me."  Came the small reply.

I looked up.  "Q?  Go away."

"What happened here?  I know something is wrong."  He came over and placed a hand on my shoulder.  "Please, tell me."

"I said, GO AWAY!"  I screamed at him.

He backed away slowly, and shut the door behind him.  I know I was over-board with him, but I just wanted to be alone for a while.  Shimatta, can't a guy cry in peace?  I snatched up the book I had been reading and ran to my room again.

I flopped on the bed and started crying once again.  I must have cried myself to unconsciousness.  It was dark when I woke up.

I groggily walked to the bathroom across the hall.  I looked like hell.  The small hairs at the back of my neck were creeping out of my braid.  My bangs were standing straight up, and I had red circles around my eyes.  Any idiot could have seen that I had been weeping.

I smelled the sweet aroma of some dish that Quatre usually cooked.  Last time I inquired what was in it, he said something about wild hare, dried sage, and some other kind of meat, but he wouldn't tell me.  And since I had to eat it, I didn't really ask much after that.  It was delicious after all.

Sometimes, with Quatre, it's give and take on what he can and can't cook.  But this seemed like some traditional Arabic dish that he was comfortable fixing.  Now, when it comes to the food I like to make, Q-man could burn down the kitchen.  I heard Rashid one day saying something about "Master Quatre" burning down a camp and causing the local authorities to come and see what the matter was.

Anyway, I walked into the dining room and sat down at my usual spot.  That's when I noticed that Wufei wasn't there.

I walked into the kitchen.  "Where's Fei?"

"Still outside.  Would you set the table for the three of us?  Afterwards, I'll go get Wufei."

"Sure, no problem."  I grabbed three sets of everything we were going to need.  "Are you fixing anything else besides that roast-thingy?"

"Bread and salad."

"You want me to fix the salad?"

"It's already done.  It's sitting in the refrigerator. You can take it out and set it on the table if you want."

"Kay."  I set the table quickly and grabbed the salad, placing it in the middle of the table section we were going to be using.  I then placed my head on my arms in the space next to my chair.

"Duo, I'm afraid that is not proper dining etiquette.  Would you please sit up?"  Quatre said softly.

"Whatever."  I sat up and looked across the table to the seat now taken by Wufei.

Dinner was cold and icy, as far as company went.  Quatre tried to keep a conversation going between us, but the cold stares he got shut him up after about five minutes.

I finished in record time, it took me about 35 minutes to finish up, and excused myself from the table.  I had made it almost all the way to my room, before someone grabbed my arm.  I turned around, and brought my other hand down on their head.

"K'so, Maxwell.  Itai." Wufei.

I spun around.  "What do you want?"  I glared at him icily, quickly slipping into Shinigami mode.  "Let me go, now!"

He released my arm.  "I…"

"I don't give a shit.  Leave me alone."  I snatched open my door and slammed it in his face.

He actually looked hurt when I yelled at him. I don't know whether or not I want to deal with him. He's been getting under my skin all day. I don't want to even face him. I have been crying again. I just can't seem to stop the tears.

Diary, I think I want him, but I can't be sure. I mean the guy put himself in dangerous territory to defend me. I put myself in dangerous territory kissing both him and Hee-chan. I suppose I deserved what I got with both of them. Father Maxwell, I need some help here.  Sister Helen, I wish I had you here so I could ask your advice. I could really use it now.

I'm kinda tired, so I think I will stop now, and get some sleep. If I'm lucky, I'll get assigned a solo mission in the morning, or something else equally nice. Night.

                                                                           ~ Duo Maxwell