VERY IMPORTANT A/N: The following is the article that Lizzie writes. It starts out really boring with a bunch of facts that, while interesting, you may not care about or may even find out of place. Truth is, its not that important. Lizzie stops the facts and starts in on her opinions towards the end. If you would like to just skip this chapter, then do so. I just put it in for those interested in reading it. Please do not bash this chapter. Consider it an "extra scene", and learn a few things. All of the facts have been researched.

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I was just guessing

At numbers and figures

Pulling your puzzles apart

Questions of science

Science and progress

Do not speak as loud as my heart

~~~Coldplay, "The Scientist"

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After another week of ranting, researching, and regular coffee breaks, I complete my article.

How It All Goes Down

Humans have always existed as visual creatures. We make judgments, whether on purpose or not, about the appearance of those we meet. The culture of today revolves around the media. A thin waist, large breasts, long legs, and a flawless face exist as the appearance media expresses for a woman. Just think about the person you would most like to look like. See what I mean?

Could this attraction based on physical appearance hold the key to a more psychological need?

Here are some scientific facts about men, women, and their attraction to each other.

Men can detect the fertility of a woman by the contrast between the waist and hip. Its rather obvious that men don't look at how fertile a woman is on purpose; rather, they are programmed to do so.

Sexual attraction starts at the hypothalamus, which controls the body's temperature as well as the secretion of hormones. With the production of these hormones comes the defining difference between males and females. Men with higher testosterone levels tend to be more aggressive and less likely to marry, or at least stick with his wife. Men with the lowest testosterone levels are more likely to stay married without infidelity. Along with estrogen, the brain of a women produces oxytocin during romantic attachment. This hormone generates a woman's impulse to feel emotionally connected to her mate.

Because sperm is plentiful, men feel more free to share generously with many women; or in other words, to "spread their seed." Women, however, produce only a single egg each month. Women are more apt to search more carefully for a mate, since the production of a child takes years of commitment and nurturing.

Women and men generally operate from different parts of the brain. A therapist says, "The verbal, sorting, detail-oriented side of the brain is the left, whereareas the spatial, intuitive, nonverbal side is the right." The left side of the brain dominates women while the right side generally controls men. The left side of the brain dominates emotional attachment and feelings. The right side controls immediate responses and actions. Women tend to dissect a situation before making a decision and taking action. Men respond more immediately. With attraction, men react quicker and more readily to sexual feelings than women. Women are more widely known for occurring as emotional beings, concentrating on the emotional aspect rather than the physical.

Now, you may wonder why I have listed all of these boring psychological theories. You might have skipped all of that, merely scanning it, and since this is a men's business magazine, might have just turned the page completely. In that case, what I have to say here might not be read by anyone but those waiting at the dentists office or stuck in the airport. But to those of you who do read this, and have been whirled in the gentle rainstorm of romance and relationships only to be sucked into the horror or the harsh hurricane, here's how it goes down.

Men are programmed to be scum. It's not their fault. They look more than anything else at the appearance of a woman, and will do anything in their power to seduce the said woman. They blind you with charms and promises. Women, think of the last relationship you were in that didn't work out. Men, you do the same.

Now, women, would you describe this man as sensible, sensitive, and sincere? When you met him, did he feed you some line about how beautiful you are? How he loves the weather outside? How long walks on the beach under the moonlight make him ponder the meaning of life? Were you already friends, and he confessed his undying love for you, and that he would always be there to help you like always, when really he just wanted an easy opportunity?

After the relationship started, did he promise you everything? An apartment, a house, a family, 2.5 kids, a dog, a white picket fence in a nice neighborhood conveniently located near mom and dad?

Men, what lies have you fed to the women in your life just to get them to go out with you? How many of you actually kept those promises? All of them?

How do we, as women, over come scum? What kind of guys are honest? Are their any? What kind of guys won't leave you for some floozy in a red dress? We need to dissect a man's personality, rather than his appearance, before romantic involvement begins.

When first meeting a guy, notice if he meets your eyes when he talks to you. Especially if he's telling you something about his interests, or paying you a compliment. Now, just because he looks you in the eyes doesn't mean he's not scum. Most men are good liars.

Why were you attracted to him in the first place? Was it his muscles or his baby blue eyes? If so, maybe you're just as bad as him. Don't fall for a guy solely based on appearance. Love at first sight usually ends the same way it began; with nothing.

Have you known this guy for awhile, in a non romantic setting? Has he stuck by you in some sort of difficult situation? Can you see him doing that always? Friendship is always the best start in a relationship, but be careful! It can also be the worst ending to one as well! Take a chance, but don't take a stupid one.

Just because a guy might not be exactly crème brou lei on the outside, doesn't mean he's not on the inside. Just because you don't think a man is very attractive, give it a shot. You might just find that the more you two have in common, the cuter he gets.

Oh, one last thing. Don't get the mindset that you and your boy toy will live happily ever after with your matching Volvos and chocolate labs. Expect the unexpected, especially when it comes to the opposite sex. Guard your heart and your emotions, until you are more than certain that he's a keeper. Honestly, women, don't think that your sole purpose in life is to get married and raise a family. Its thoughts like that that keep most women from truly finding out all that they are. Overcome scum with your knowledge of motives.

And to the men, stop being scum. And, if you are scum, and know it, give us some warning.

This has been Miss Cynical, reporting on the truth about men and women.