Hn. None of you could be BOTHERED TO REVIEW! Well Damn.Thanks to Riki and Fuji, anyway.  Only Shiei and Stabitha got it right. The answer was: When I said, "Like I'm a scout!" I was referring to Jackie Chan Adventures, when Jade promises Jacky she'll stay put. I'm sorry if you can't watch that program, and don't try to get revenge. I have been taking an Imodium A.D. after every meal to make sure Mr. Iishi doesn't exact his revenge. And for all you non-Southern readers…if you had paid attention to the context, diarrhea is also know as the "trots" here in the American south, I don't know of anywhere else. Hence the name, as you are trotting back and forth to the bathroom. Okay…gods, I hate culture. ~Belch~ The only one I have is bacteria. I thank Jenele once again…as she supplies me with my daily dose of Insanity. AH, Insanity…my ninjas will eventually kill you.

Guest Characters: Bustahead, Stabitha, Meari, Raven King

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tenchu 4: Assassins of Insanity

Chapter 3: Girls, Girls, Girls, and Chickens

By: Dragon Lady

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Shinobi Iishi, Ayame, Zhang, and Bustahead are walking through the forest, laughin back an' forth at what the othern' has to say…0_0]

Narrator- THIS…IS THE STORY...OF TWO SHADOWS…BORN UNTO DARKNESS…AND DESTINED TO DIE…UNTO DARKNESS!

[The narrator spoke so abruptly that the ground trembled and the group is seriously shaken.]

Ayame- What the fuck??

Shin- @_@

Zhang- /Yaaaaaaaaay! He's unconscious…I can rape him now! / ~Rape rape~

Busta- I think it was the narrator…

Ayame- Why a narrator, in the middle of the freaking woods?

Dragon- He's talking about you and Riki!

Ayame- Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiikiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! Waaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhaaaaaa!

Busta- _

Dragon- ~makes magical duck tape appear over Ayame's mouth~

Shin- ~sees a random chicken~ CHICKEN! Petthechickenpetthechickenpetthechicken!

Zhang- Hey, how'd you come around so fast? Come back, baby!

[Everyone begins running after Shinobi]

Busta- Hey! Wait! You're going the wrong way! ~mumbles~ master ninjas, my a-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

~an earthquake occurs~

Ayame- ~falls off a cliff~ Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Zhang- AYAME! ~trips over a root and falls too~

Shin- ~has lost sight of the chicken and is looking over the edge of the cliff~ Damn, I lost all my Chicks down there!

Busta- \_/

Shin- O.o Sorry….

Busta- Uh-oh…

Shin- What is it, Buttahead?

Busta- IT'S BUSTAHEAD! ~bonks with an iron skillet~

Shin-X-x sorry….

Busta- They've fallen straight into Shojou…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ayame- ~wakes up to find she is tied to Zhang by her hair~

Stabitha-You woke up, finally!

Ayame- WHO ARE YOU!!?!?!?!?!?!

Stabitha- Look two lines up, dear.

Ayame- ~reads~ sta-bit-ha. Alright, Sta-Bit-Ha! Let us go!

Stabitha- -_- I'm so glad you can read.

Ayame- Me too! ^^

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shin- ~actually being sensible and trying to sneak into the hut where Zhang and Ayame are~

Busta- ~running around indiscriminately killing ninja-girls with Arson-powers~

Shin- Aw, what the hell! ~following Busta's lead~

Stabitha- ~Drags Zhang and Ayame outside~ You there! Killing all my chicks!

Busta- \_/

Shin- She wasn't talking about you.

Stabitha-Okay…all remaining  ninjas, ATTACK!

Shin- ~sarcastically~ Oooooooooh noooooooooooooo! Were getting attacked my PMSing ninja ladies!

Ninja Lady 1- Say one more thing, and they're all over the side of the mountain!

Shin- What?

Ninja lady 2- Your nuts.

Shin- NOBODY threatens my nuts and gets away with it! LET'S KICK ASS GIRLS!

Busta- YAY, VIOLENCE!

~enormously violent full-scale battle ensues~

Busta- ~shooting flame at everyone randomly and hits Shinobi in the ass~

Shin- YOWCH! ~pants have burned through, revealing his pinstriped underwear~ WATCH IT, BUST-HEADS!

Busta- \_/ It's BUSTAHEAD!

Zhang- There are too many of them!

Ayame- ~think think~ Hmmmmm…..I HAVE AN IDEA! ~rips shinobi's clothes off, picks him up, swings him around and send him flying~

Ninja girl 1- OMG! GET HIM! ^^ 

~all the ninja chicks run after him~

Shin- ~off in the distance~ Now ladies, there's enough Shinobi to go arou- NOOOOOOOO! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Ayame- Now, Stabitha! Fight me fairly!

Stabitha- I'm a jonin, you asshat, I don't have to fight you if I don't want to! I can just get one my lackeys out here…and… MEARI!

Meari- ~comes stumbling out of a hut~ GOD, WHAT!?!

Stabitha- Kill 'em. I need to order the Naked pictures of Brandon Lee!

Meari- ^0^ If I kill them , will you let me see them?

Stabitha- Yep.

Meari- \_/ KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILL!

Bree- BILL!

Meari- ~shoves Bree out of the way~  DIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIESINEVILDIE! BHURDS!

~birds come flying out of the attic of Stabitha's house~

Meari- PECK THE FUCKERS TO DEATH!

Bhurds- ~just land anywhere they want to~

Stabitha- ~from inside the house~ Nice going, Meari. You dork.

Meari- T_T I'M SORRY!

Stabitha- It's ordered!

Meari- Will you still let me see it when it gets here?

Stabitha- No. You Fucked up.

Meari- Grrrrrrrr…~black flames start to surround her~ CAW! CAW CAW CAW CAW! CAW CAW!

Ayame- What the hell is she doing?

Busta- It looks like, she's calling crows.

~crows begin to darken the sky~

Zhang- I hate crows…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Raven King- HAHAHAHAHA! OW! DAMN SWORD! ~grabs the sword stuck in his chest~ DAMN MICHIZANE!

Zhang- HOLY SHIT! THAT IS ONE HONKIN CROW!

Raven King- I took my vitamins. They were shaped like the Flintstones.

Busta- oO;

Raven king- ~swoops down and attacks~

Zhang- Ayame, Busta, you deal with the big one! I'll get Meari!

Meari- Oh, crappity!

Zhang- ~barely touches Meari with the edge of her sword~

Meari- OOOOOOOOOOOOOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW! STAAAAAAAAAAAABBY, I'm BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDING!

~crows and raven king back off~

Stabitha- Meari, you're like, the WORST lackey I've ever had. GET BACK TO YOUR ROOST!

Meari- But-

Stabitha- NO! ~points to the attic~

Meari- Okay…~roosts~

Stabitha- Godz…have to do everything myself. ~takes out her yellow guitar~ Okay, lets go.

Ayame- You fight with a guitar?

Stabitha- ¯_¯; YES! ~plays a chord~

Ayame- ~clamps her hands over her ears~ OH! THE EAR SHATTERING NOOOOOOOOOOOISE!

Stabitha- ~cackles~

Ayame- X_X

Stabitha- AWW YEA! WHO'S NEXT? Uh-oh…

~the sun is rising~

Stabitha- ACK! I'll be right back. ~running back to her house~ I'm not gonna make it!

~the sun rises fully, and Stabitha catches fire and turns to dust~

Stabitha- MEARI! GET YOUR ARSE OUT HERE AND SWEEP ME UP! Oh…nice doggy,…good doggy…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhang- ~gathers Shinobi Iishi~

Ayame- and we're still nowhere near Riki, are we?

Busta- Heavens, NO!

Everyone- ~laughs~

Shin- God, what the hell are we laughing at? This is like some stupid cliché anime!

Zhang- You got that right!

~everyone starts laughing again~

Shin- STOP IT!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~THE END ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the next chapter, I'll tell what all the allusions are, and add a new character or two.