Part 2
Title: Losses and Gains
Author: Serendipity
Summary: Part 2 of Wills and Guardianships. Contains just before Heroes and
right after the episode. Janet's POV. Warning Character death in this part.
Lots of Angst, Hurt...
Dedicated to Kathy
Thank god, the guys went already and are fully geared up for this rescue mission. It gives me a few moments to think, to get my head on straight. Going through the gate isn't a difficult thing, its just that I don't do it that much.
As Cassie has said, it's sometimes better to have the injured come to you.
But not this time. I have to go to them.
As I lace up my boot, for some reason there is this nagging feeling in the base of my stomach. You know the kind when you know something is about to go drastically wrong.
I stop what I am doing, and look up. I guess Sam noticed, because she asked me what was wrong.
"Janet" She says, as she comes to sit next to me on the bench. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Janet..."
I know there is no fooling Sam. She has this gift to know exactly what one is thinking.
Like now.
"I am fine Sam. Really, there is nothing to worry about."
"I worry Janet."
We sit in silence for a few moments before I decide that its probably a good thing to tell Sam.
Not that its going to make this feeling go away.
I take a deep breath, "You know when you get this feeling in the pit of your stomach, like something is going to go really really wrong?"
She nods. I know first hand that Sam has had these kind of feelings before. Especially when a certain Colonel is involved.
Anyway, "I have that feeling right now Sam. I know I shouldn't be nervous or scared, or any of the other emotions that are flowing through me," I stop and look over at her, "But I can't help it Sam."
"Janet, I of all people understand what you are feeling. This is a standard recon, get to the injured and get home." She grabs my hand and gives it a quick squeeze, "There is nothing to worry about Janet."
Its hard to believe her, this feeling is so strong.
I shrug and finish my task at hand.
This is all wrong.
We finish gearing up and head to the embarkation room where the rest of SG- 1 are waiting along with my medical staff.
This is it... I don't know what to think or say...I just have to do my job.
And get home.
Why am I so nervous?
Once through the gate, Colonel O'Neill gave out orders, and I took Daniel with me to scout out for the injured SG team.
I was working as fast and completely as I can. I have already headed over to the second solider I would, Daniel surprisingly is keeping up and doing exactly what I am telling him to do.
As quickly as we started to make progress, was as quickly as it all went to hell.
Shots rang out, I saw Daniel draw his weapon and yell at me to keep on working, he was there. Everything was going to be alright.
So I kept on working.
I looked up suddenly and motioned to get Daniel's attention, when suddenly there was a loud whoosh, and I felt hot and burning pain. I hear Daniel screaming at me to stay still, holding my hand.
I see him look away and over at someone else who was running towards us no doubt.
Realizing it was the Colonel, I struggle to turn my head towards him.
"Doc, you have to hold on."
"Colonel..."
"Daniel, come on lets get this show on the road."
I can tell he is struggling with this. Poor Daniel, he doesn't know what to do...
"Daniel, come on, get a move on."
Daniel just sits there next to me, how can I leave this man? He is holding my hand, and stroking the said of my face with the other.
The thought saddens me that I never got to tell him what my feelings were, that we never got the chance to...
Oh Daniel...
I can hear the shots getting louder, they are getting closer.
"Colonel, please..." I reach for his hand to get his attention.
"Doc..."
"Take care of Cassie, and..." I stop this is so hard, I can feel myself leaving this place, and I don't want to go, "And watch over Sam. Take care of her, she is going to need you."
I can hear Sam yelling for us in the background, oh god please don't let her see this, I can't do that to her. Please Sam stay away, go dial the gate, go...do something.
I must be trying to move around or something because I hear the Colonel talking to me again. "Doc, come on stay still, we are going to make it home." God he sounds so sad, so lost.
Funny how I can't feel anything, I am just so numb...cold.
Although I could see it in his eyes, I know the Colonel is lying to me.
I knew I wasn't going to make it home.
Daniel and the Colonel some how got me onto some sort of gurney and we were now running towards the gate.
I could hear it being dialed up from where we were.
And then there was nothing.
Thank god, the guys went already and are fully geared up for this rescue mission. It gives me a few moments to think, to get my head on straight. Going through the gate isn't a difficult thing, its just that I don't do it that much.
As Cassie has said, it's sometimes better to have the injured come to you.
But not this time. I have to go to them.
As I lace up my boot, for some reason there is this nagging feeling in the base of my stomach. You know the kind when you know something is about to go drastically wrong.
I stop what I am doing, and look up. I guess Sam noticed, because she asked me what was wrong.
"Janet" She says, as she comes to sit next to me on the bench. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Janet..."
I know there is no fooling Sam. She has this gift to know exactly what one is thinking.
Like now.
"I am fine Sam. Really, there is nothing to worry about."
"I worry Janet."
We sit in silence for a few moments before I decide that its probably a good thing to tell Sam.
Not that its going to make this feeling go away.
I take a deep breath, "You know when you get this feeling in the pit of your stomach, like something is going to go really really wrong?"
She nods. I know first hand that Sam has had these kind of feelings before. Especially when a certain Colonel is involved.
Anyway, "I have that feeling right now Sam. I know I shouldn't be nervous or scared, or any of the other emotions that are flowing through me," I stop and look over at her, "But I can't help it Sam."
"Janet, I of all people understand what you are feeling. This is a standard recon, get to the injured and get home." She grabs my hand and gives it a quick squeeze, "There is nothing to worry about Janet."
Its hard to believe her, this feeling is so strong.
I shrug and finish my task at hand.
This is all wrong.
We finish gearing up and head to the embarkation room where the rest of SG- 1 are waiting along with my medical staff.
This is it... I don't know what to think or say...I just have to do my job.
And get home.
Why am I so nervous?
Once through the gate, Colonel O'Neill gave out orders, and I took Daniel with me to scout out for the injured SG team.
I was working as fast and completely as I can. I have already headed over to the second solider I would, Daniel surprisingly is keeping up and doing exactly what I am telling him to do.
As quickly as we started to make progress, was as quickly as it all went to hell.
Shots rang out, I saw Daniel draw his weapon and yell at me to keep on working, he was there. Everything was going to be alright.
So I kept on working.
I looked up suddenly and motioned to get Daniel's attention, when suddenly there was a loud whoosh, and I felt hot and burning pain. I hear Daniel screaming at me to stay still, holding my hand.
I see him look away and over at someone else who was running towards us no doubt.
Realizing it was the Colonel, I struggle to turn my head towards him.
"Doc, you have to hold on."
"Colonel..."
"Daniel, come on lets get this show on the road."
I can tell he is struggling with this. Poor Daniel, he doesn't know what to do...
"Daniel, come on, get a move on."
Daniel just sits there next to me, how can I leave this man? He is holding my hand, and stroking the said of my face with the other.
The thought saddens me that I never got to tell him what my feelings were, that we never got the chance to...
Oh Daniel...
I can hear the shots getting louder, they are getting closer.
"Colonel, please..." I reach for his hand to get his attention.
"Doc..."
"Take care of Cassie, and..." I stop this is so hard, I can feel myself leaving this place, and I don't want to go, "And watch over Sam. Take care of her, she is going to need you."
I can hear Sam yelling for us in the background, oh god please don't let her see this, I can't do that to her. Please Sam stay away, go dial the gate, go...do something.
I must be trying to move around or something because I hear the Colonel talking to me again. "Doc, come on stay still, we are going to make it home." God he sounds so sad, so lost.
Funny how I can't feel anything, I am just so numb...cold.
Although I could see it in his eyes, I know the Colonel is lying to me.
I knew I wasn't going to make it home.
Daniel and the Colonel some how got me onto some sort of gurney and we were now running towards the gate.
I could hear it being dialed up from where we were.
And then there was nothing.