Sam's POV

This is the firs time I had to work late in almost 2 months.

And I want to go home.

Its funny how the meaning of 'home' can change at the drop of a hat.

I love where I am right now, Cassie living with us, and us at Jack's house.

I never imagined it would turn out like this. I mean I hoped it did, dreamt it did.

But losing Janet...I didn't want it to happen that way at all.

I miss my best friend.

Sitting here late at night, the base is basically dark, Janet would be here, telling me to go home, get some sleep, eat.

But here, now, I am all alone.

No one is going to come and visit me to make sure I do all of those things.

God do I miss her.

There are nights where I just sit in my room and cry.

I had one the other night.

Cassie did to... our own little pitty party.

Jack has been wonderful. I love that man.

Probably even more then I did 3 months ago.

God how things can change.

I am so not getting anything done right now.

Maybe I should go home?

Jack said he wanted to have a night with just Cassie, that he wanted to talk with her.

Which got me thinking, what does he want to talk with Cassie about?

I mean we talk with her every day, make sure she is okay.

She says she is. I mean I know how hard it is lose a mother, and a best friend.

And that's what they were.

I can only hope to have that kind of relationship with her or any other of my children.

My children, that brings up another whole topic.

I want to have children, with Jack.

But I am not sure if that's in his plans or what.

And so soon after losing one of our friends... and gaining a teenager...well you know what I am talking about.

I really think I need to get home, and I am not getting anything done just sitting here.

I wish my brain would just stop for 5 minutes sometimes.