Okay... this chapter was somewhat easier to write for some reason, and I'm working on the next one.. some weirdness happens in here.. I think I was watching too much Inu-Yasha on Adult Swim, so please forgive my silly parodies of certain commercials.. gah. Anyways, I also got my hands on a copy of Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, which is absolutely great, in a disturbing sort of way. Jhonen Vasquez is the man, but you all knew that already. However, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac had no influence on this chapter. I was done writing it yesterday.. heehee... I'm under the influence of Beethoven right now, and if my brother does not stop dancing around me like a total moron I'm going to get homicidal on him. On with the fic! Deadlines disturb me! Let me fight off rat-monkeys with sporks!

Chapter 12 - Virus

And so.. the Earth boy had amnesia. It was a great annoyance to Zim, because once again the Universe's largest pest was demanding answers from him. Zim couldn't contain his groans of irritation at this latest unfortunate mishap, but he refused to explain himself to the Dib once again.

"Ohh.. for Irk's sake," Zim muttered to himself.

"What?"

"I said you're really annoying when you're awake!" Zim huffed, crossing his arms and turning away. "Why don't humans sleep more?"

"How many hours was I asleep?"

"About four.."

"No wonder I'm so tired..." Dib said weakly, covering his mouth as he yawned.

"So you'll be going back to sleep then, irritating human?" Zim asked eagerly, almost desperately hoping the answer was yes. He liked the feeling of peace he had when Dib was asleep.

"Actually.. no," Dib smirked, hearing the almost happy tone in Zim's voice. The alien's antennae drooped in disappointment as a glare returned to his eyes. "Why did you say that we had 24 hours until my untimely death.. and why is it so untimely for you?" He asked this cautiously.. why couldn't he remember? This was the horrible feeling that had been in his stomach before Zim had even told him.. some part of him knew vaguely of his impending doom.

"Come on, Dib.. can't you just remember so I don't have to tell you all over again? I swear.. repeating myself is going to be bad for my health or something.. I can't wait until this weekend is over!"

"I wish I could remember," Dib muttered, "Then I could just not talk to you at all." He narrowed his eyes at the alien. "What did you do to me?" Zim looked insulted that Dib would even accuse him of anything, until he remembered that he would indeed love to cause Dib immense amounts of pain... and torture... but still, he had his good name to protect. After all, if he had been the one to do something to Dib, it would have been so much worse. So much more painful... how could Dib even think that he would be so kind to kill him with poison? No.. he would have used poison, and sharp pointy things.. and he would probably also dissect the human while he was still alive or something.. yess..

"You did it to yourself!" Zim shouted, clenching his fists so hard that his claws actually started cutting through his thick gloves. "You should be grateful that I'm even caring enough to bother to save you, even if it is just to kill you later."

"So you.. didn't do anything to me?"

"Of course I didn't. I wouldn't lie when it comes to destroying you, Dib-human."

"What happened?"

"You very stupidly touched something you shouldn't have, and are dying because of it. As we speak, poison is pumping through your fragile and inferior human veins, you're becoming weaker, and soon you'll probably keel over and start twitching and foaming at the mouth before your heart stops completely," Zim said darkly, grinning as he watched Dib's reaction to his words. "You'll be in so much pain.. but I'm not sure when the really horrible things will start happening... in the reptiles it occured within seconds. I'm sure that you, as a monkey, aren't very far from a reptile on the evolutionary chain at all. I also think that it will be very unbearable when your muscles start spasming... you'll tell me, won't you?"

Dib looked panic stricken once again as he sat up to look at Zim, who was now chuckling evilly to himself and staring intently at the boy.

"Poison?" The Earth boy asked. He felt lightheaded again, like his brain was going fuzzy.. then everything went black.

"Dib?" Zim asked, peering closer at him. The boy had fainted. He lay there, his eyes closed, covered in sweat once more. "Did I scare you to death? Has your heart stopped?" He listened closely with his internal ears, hearing nothing but his own breathing at first.. then as he focused he heard the beating of Dib's very alive heart. "Damn," he murmured with a slight smile and a soft sigh of relief.

The human eventually stirred with a soft groan. He had hit his head pretty hard on the edge of the table, which had been the only place that hadn't been covered with a soft padding. Zim didn't look up from what he was doing now. The mixture had stopped it's fizzing and had now turned back to the color of Zim's blood.. only slightly darker, and it was time for him now to add the Dib's blood to it.

It had a pretty color, the Dib's blood. It was interesting to look at. The alien had to contain his evil giggles as he thought about how nice it would look splattered all over the walls of his labs. "Gah!" He said suddenly, shaking the morbid thoughts out of his head and quickly opening the container to add the human's deep crimson blood. Panting slightly, he closed it and set it back down on the table. 'I must be going mad,' he thought to himself, 'yes, this weekend is driving me mad...' He heard a metallic clattering from down the hallway.

"FREE THE SOCK CHICKEN!!!" GIR screamed, running into the room. Zim gasped and pressed a button on a control panel that was set in the wall, causing a forcefield to envelop itself around the container where the Varda was once again bubbling and fizzing as if it was corrosive. The robot made an odd shrieking noise and jumped onto his master's head.

"What?" Dib asked weakly, turning to his side to look at the odd pair. They slowly came into focus, and his head hurt.

"GIR! Get off of my head!"

"We have to free Sock Chicken!" GIR announced again, then started giggling. Dib raised an eyebrow at Zim, who just shrugged.

"Who's Sock Chicken?" Dib asked, straightening his glasses as they had been askew on his face.

"Get off of my head, GIR!" Zim ordered again.

"Some guy on tv!" GIR said cheerfully, jumping off of the distressed alien's head. "He's being held prisoner!" Zim let out a huff of annoyance again, glaring down at his crazy robot slave. "We have to set him free!"

"Fine!" Zim's eye was twitching. "GIR!"

"Yes sir?!" The robot's eyes and body were glowing red again as he saluted.

"Go.. free your sock chicken guy or whatever..." Zim waved a hand dismissively at GIR, who in turn giggled loudly and raced from the room.

"FREE SOCK CHICKEN!!!" He shouted once again. Zim sighed in relief as he heard GIR's feet clattering down the hall... until he heard a loud crash followed by the buzzing of electricity.

"GIR!" He shouted again, only to hear more maniac laughter from a floor above him. More crashes.. clattering footsteps. The giggles were coming from below them now. Dib raised an eyebrow at Zim again. "Computer!" Zim yelled, his antennae flattening against his skull.

"Yes sir?" The computer replied, it's voice sounded slower for some reason.

"What madness is GIR speaking of, and what is he doing?"

"Sir, the unit GIR is moving from computer console console....in the house in his attempt..."

"Yes?"

"To free the one called Sock... Chickennnnn..." The computer trailed off, making a loud buzzing noise.

"Computer?" Zim asked, but the computer did not respond to him.

"Overload.. humanoid program invasion.. virus alert!" The computer shouted, then buzzed again and shut down throughout the house. The lights went out, leaving Dib and Zim in blackness once more.

"Some advanced alien technology," Dib laughed, looking around in the pitch blackness. "You can still be infected by human viruses?" Zim growled in response and marched from the room. Dib hoped that he wouldn't forget that.. it may come in handy one day.

"GIR!!!" The Invader roared as he stood in the hall. This was stupid.. how was he supposed to watch the mixture and fix the computer system at the same time? GIR dropped from the ceiling, saluting him once again. His red eyes cast an eerie light on the walls of the hallway. Dib felt a chill run through him as the light seeped into the room.

"Yes, my lord?!"

"What did you do?!"

"I went on the internet to free the sock chicken, like you told me to, master!" GIR smiled up at him, his eyes turning back to the turquoise-ish color they usually were. Zim growled, seething with anger. His fists were clenched again and his body shook.

"The.. internet?" Zim said slowly, forcing himself to remain calm. Dib listened carefully in the next room. "Let me guess.. the human internet?" GIR nodded in response. Zim slapped himself in the forehead, growling in annoyance as his anger slowly but surely started to fade. "GIR, do you realize that the house's computer now has a virus because of that inferior human technology?"

"Yay!" GIR giggled and danced. Dib smirked from where he lay on the table. When he really thought about it, Zim wasn't too much of a threat to Earth if he had GIR with him.

"No.. no GIR," Zim said. "That's bad." He sounded very.. tired suddenly, and felt even moreso.

"Oh," GIR responded, not really caring very much. The Invader sighed loudly, picking his sidekick up and taking him into the room next to Dib's.

"What am I going to do with you?" He asked absentmindedly, thinking about how he was going to manage to fix everything...fast.

"Feed me tacos?" GIR asked him hopefully.

"Heh heh heh.. I think not, GIR." Zim shook his head as he put him down. "I want you to stay right here, and do not move an inch from this spot until I get the computer working again. I am also ordering you to not make a sound because I'm going to need every once of concentration that my amazing brain can provide, and I don't need you disturbing the Dib-human, either." Not to mention the fact that when the computers shut off, the forcefield around the antidote had also deactivated, leaving it exposed to the amazing destruction that GIR could cause to it.

"Wait.." GIR said slowly, "Why can't I disturb the Dib-human?"' He then gasped as if suddenly coming to a realization of.. something.

"Because he's going to need his rest for the recovery pro-"

"I know why!" GIR announced loudly. Zim raised an invisible eyebrow at the robot.

"Why, GIR?"

"Could it be that master actually cares enough about the Dib-filth to want him to get his rest?" Zim cringed at the very thought, grabbed GIR and chucked him across the room, where the robot landed in a crumpled heap in front of the blank and silent tv monitor.

"Whoo!" He cheered. "I knew it!"

"NONSENSE!" Zim ranted once more. "You speak madness! I care for nothing, GIR! NOTHING!" He had said it himself, earlier.. and he remembered it well. It was all his good side's fault.. curse it! Damn it! Hopefully the Dib would never remember what he had said, it was humiliating.. and stupid. How could he let his emotions get in the way? How could he have been so.. weak? "I do not need his companionship!" He ranted aloud, then muttered some very foul Irken curse words at himself for saying so.

It was horrible to feel so torn. His fondness of the human and his immense hatred of him were eating away at his insides.

GIR was smiling at him, smiling as if he knew exactly what his master was thinking.. feeling.. but that was impossible. Zim eyed him suspiciously. Irken technology was in fact that advanced, but there was no way GIR could possibly..

"Do you need a hug?" The robot asked, reaching toward him. Zim cringed again and stepped back, he thought he heard the Dib snickering in the next room.

"No, no GIR.. I do not need a hug," he said calmly. "What I need you to do is to stay here, and please follow my orders as I fix what you have broken."

"Awww... you said please." GIR smiled again.

"......." glare...

"Yes sir!" GIR's eyes were glowing red again, a confirmation that Zim's orders were at least understood. The alien sighed again, marching from the room once more and making his way down the dark hall.

"Zim?"

He turned as the cautious sounding voice floated from the room where Dib was contained.

"What is it, Dib-human? Your sister's wretched piggies aren't plagueing you again are they?" He entered the pitch blackness of the room, his hands on his hips. Dib was staring in the direction of the door. He couldn't see Zim, and the alien knew this.. but he felt him and could hear him there.

"No, I was just wondering.." the boy trailed off, thinking about whether he should really ask his question or not.

"Hmm?"

"Could you use any help?"

"What?" Zim was once again staring at the Earth-child in disbelief. The human actually wanted to help him? This was unexpected. His antennae were twitching slightly.

"I'm serious," Dib said cautiously again, leaning forward and trying to get down from the table. "Would you like me to help you?" Zim nodded slowly, then shook his head quickly, putting back on the mask that he usually showed to the human. Thank goodness humans didn't have ocular implants.

"Well.. I'm quite sure that you won't be able to do anything, seeing as you know nothing of superior Irken technology........ and I intend to keep it that way," he quickly added. "But you may be able to help with this.. stupid.. virus the computer speaks of-"

Dib gasped as his legs gave out under him again as soon as he put his weight onto them. He reached forward to stop his fall, but he didn't need to. Zim's arm was around his waist as the alien caught him and supported him again. Dib shuddered and let out a sound like a growl.

"It's a shame that you can't remember anything, Dib.. else you would have known that your legs haven't worked properly since the accident," Zim was calm, and though he hated to admit it, too tired to put up much of an fight against Dib. He didn't shudder at the fact that he had to be in close contact with Dib again, it was pointless to keep doing so. At least he wasn't covered in slime or something. "You really should be getting more rest."

"Wow, Zim.. I didn't know you cared so much," Dib teased, though his tone sounded malicious, as he smirked in the darkness. Zim's eye twitched slightly as he stomped down hard on the human's foot. "OW!!!"

"Shut up," the Irken hissed as he half carried, half dragged the boy from the room.