A Travel Through Time: A Study in the Dork Lord
Another chapter! And a quick update! It's all you can ask for! Well, maybe not that quick, but hey, it's at least faster then my other ones. Well, here are some replies:
Icy Candy: Yes. Sirius lives to destroy Harry's sanity, and disrupt classes! [Sirius: HEY!]
CapriceAnn Hedican-Kocur: I know . . . It sucks so much Sirius had to die. He only lasted 2 books. sigh well, I'd be happy if they revive Sirius, but I doubt it.
Fallen Dragon: I did read it. Isn't it so sad Sirius had to die? *wails* and Sirius was my favorite!
Lady Phoenix Gryffindor: You're right. There were rumors all around that Hagrid or Dumbledore would die, but she just HAD to kill of Sirius. It's a disruption to the fanfic community!
anon: Thanks for reviewing lots and lots!
Ami: Thanks for adding me to your favorites!
Robby Kujo: Really? That is some twisted fate. Kubo?
Aimee: See? I updated! And you better review this time, who do you think I'm typing this for? (Ok, so maybe not)
**************************************************************************** *
The seventh year Gryffindors and Slytherins were sitting at their desks, talking and laughing and gossiping about the new teacher.
"I don't know . . . There's a rumor that the new assistants real name is Sirius Spinelli!" Peter exclaimed to the Marauders.
"Cool, Sirius, you have the same name as the assistant." Remus remarked, looking over his essay.
"Really? COOL! Everyone, bow down before the all mighty assistant- professor!" Sirius boasted, standing up and bowing.
James rolled his eyes. "Puh-lease, Sirius. Sit down. Anyway, got the Filbusters Fireworks?"
"Gotcha, mate!" Sirius said with a grin.
Suddenly, there was a BANG and a few screams.
"SIRIUS! Why'd you let them out-?"
"I didn't! See, I have them here!" Sirius exclaimed, showing James his Fireworks.
"Then who-?"
"SIRIUS! GET OVER HERE RIGHT NOW, YOU MORON!"
The whole class turned towards Harry, who had just entered, fuming.
"But I didn't-" Sirius tried to say, but Harry kept on yelling.
"YOU -PROMISED- THAT YOU WOULDN'T CAUSE ANY TROUBLE! GET OUT HERE AT ONCE!"
There was a swish and a huge THUD as a cloud of smoke filled the room.
"What the-?"
"Sorry, sorry, Harry dude. Go easy. I just wanted to cheer up the whole class . . ."
"YOU WILL NOT! I HAVE A LESSON TO TEACH HERE, YOU DOG!"
Sirius straightened up and dusted himself. "Don't use too much of your voice. And the whole class is watching, too."
Harry stopped and faced the class, his face red. "Sorry." He murmured.
"Today's lessons will be about a study in Voldie." He announced.
There were gasps throughout the class.
"Did he just call you-know-who Voldie-?"
"A study in YOU-KNOW-WHO?"
"Silence!" Harry said, and the whole class quieted down.
"Now, does anyone know Voldie's real name?"
There were murmurs throughout the class, but no one dared to raise a hand.
"No one?" Harry asked, raising an eyebrow.
Slowly, and very quietly, Lily raised her hand. "Riddle. His real name is Riddle."
Harry grinned and applauded. "Very well! Three points for Gryffindor! Yes, his name is- was- Tom Marvolo Riddle. You see, he hated that name because he was named after his muggle father. You know how he hates muggles, right?"
There were shudders as everyone nodded slowly.
"Well, let me teach you a cool trick."
Harry raised his wand and spelled out:
'Tom Marvolo Riddle'
Everyone exchanged puzzled glances.
Then, Harry slowly rearranged the letters. There was another round of gasps as they saw what the letters had become.
'I am Voldemort'
"Sweet, isn't it?" Harry asked with a lopsided grin.
"Now, Simon, I want you to write the stuff I want you to write, and you know what to write, don't you? And-"
Harry flicked his wand and Sirius' wand was in his hand, and Sirius was holding a piece of chalk.
Sirius' jaws dropped when he saw the feeble chalk. "WHAT? Chalk? Why do I have to write with a stinking CHALK?"
Harry grinned mischievously. "Your punishment for setting off the fireworks. Write in neat letters, please. Make them readable for once."
Sirius groaned as he faced the board. He immediately began to write.
'A Study in the Dork Lord'
There were muffled giggles from the class.
Hestia Jones raised her hand. "Yes, Miss Jones?" Harry asked.
"I think Professor Kubo misspelled a word."
There were more giggles.
Harry turner around and read the title. "I don't see anything wrong, Miss Jones. Will you kindly point it out for me?"
Jones looked totally clueless. "But- but- isn't it supposed to be D-A-R-K, not D-O-R-K?"
James couldn't contain his laughter. "The DORK Lord! Oh my gosh! The DORK LORD!"
Sirius joined his in his laughing spree as well.
Harry quirked an eyebrow. "Mr. Potter, Mr. Black, and everyone else, isn't Voldie a Dork?"
The whole class burst into laughter except for the Slytherins, who were quite frowning.
"As you know, Voldie has many names he has been called. A few are Voldie, Voldemort, or the Dork Lord." Harry announced. "Write this down, please, Simon."
"Can everyone tell me every name Voldie is called?"
The class went on successfully, and the blackboard ended up like this: (much to Sirius' dismay because of his sore hand)
*******************************************
'A Study in the Dork Lord
*Names the Dork Lord has been called before.
-Voldemort
-Voldie
-Dark Lord
-Master
-Dork Lord
-You-Know-Who
-He-Who's-Name-Must-Be-Hyphenated
-He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named
-Baldie
-Punk
-Villain
-Ice Cream Lover
-Tom Marvolo Riddle
-Tommy
-Parselmouth
*Possible Reasons On Why Voldie decided to become evil
-His father (Evans) [HARRY: POSSIBLE. VERY POSSIBLE.]
-Because he hated muggles (Malfoy) [HARRY: WELL, MAYBE, BUT WE SHOULDN'T HATE MUGGLE TOO, YOU KNOW.]
-His passion for Dark Arts (Snape) [SIRIUS: ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF, SNAPE?]
-An evil spirit of a long lost villain seeking revenge (?) possessed Voldie (Black) [MALFOY: YEAH, RIGHT. WHO? SALAZAR SLYTHERIN? OR MAYBE SOME PIXIES WHO WERE KILLED BY MUGGLES?]
-He was a Parselmouth (Avery) [SIMON: TELL ME, AVERY, WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH EVIL?]
-He was treated badly by the muggles. (Jones) [HARRY: RIGHT ON, MISS JONES. THAT'S THE MOST LIKELY REASON.]
-Someone came and scouted him to join him to conquer the world, but Voldie killed him and decided to take over the world by himself. (Potter) [SIRIUS: YEAH, WHO SCOUTED HIM? THE GIRL SCOUTS?]
-All this killing was only meant for one person, like Dumbledore. But Voldie wanted to disguise the attacks so it looked like he was just killing off random people, much like the 'ABC Murder' by Agatha Christy. (Mc Claire) [SNAPE: YOU READ TOO MUCH MUGGLE NOVELS!]
*History of the Dork Lord
I hope you were listening to the Professor, 'cause no way am I going to copy that all down.
*Profile of the Dark Lord
Name: Tom Marvolo Riddle or Voldemort
Age: Unknown, but at least 67 years old 'cause he was around when the Chamber of Secrets were opened.
Hair color: Used to be black, but he's probably bald right now. (Get it? BALDIE!)
Eye color: No one knows, but it's probably red.
Family: He had a dad and mum, but his mum died giving birth to him and he killed his own dad.
Living: Somewhere. No one knows. If we knew, there would be no trouble catching him.
Wand made of: Hornbeam and phoenix feather
Some other stuff: A Parselmouth, likes killing muggles, scared of Dumbledore.
*Homework for next time
-12 inches essay about the History of the Dark Lord. I HOPE YOU TOOK NOTES! Due next Thursday.
***********************************
"You are excused." Harry said to the class.
Immediately, the whole class began chattering loudly, as if someone just switched off the mute button.
Harry turned towards Sirius, crossing his arms. "SIMON . . . You are so dead. Why did you have to set off those damn things? And-"
He pointed towards the board. "It looks like your talking, or your having a chat session. You didn't have to add in the snide comments too, you know. Sheesh. You can't even write down the boards properly!"
Sirius grinned. "I really had to . . . I love pranks, and you know that. And why did you have to make me write the board in the muggle way? I had to use a damn -stool- to reach the top!"
Harry smiled and wiggled a finger in his face. "You need discipline, dear Padfoot. And I'll be happy to give you my own original detention . . . BEWARE!"
Sirius laughed. "Geez, it seems like Harry is teaching me, when I'm supposed to be teaching you! And I just remembered, when I set off those fireworks, you came in yelling for Sirius, instead of Simon. Poor little me was scared half out of his wits."
Harry went red. "Oops. Have to begin calling you Simon all the time, eh? Well, let's get on. We've got more stuff to do. Not to mention our growling stomachs."
Sirius quickly agreed and together, they walked towards the Great Hall.
*****************************************************
Shorter chapter, but wanted to update^^ Well, review!
Another chapter! And a quick update! It's all you can ask for! Well, maybe not that quick, but hey, it's at least faster then my other ones. Well, here are some replies:
Icy Candy: Yes. Sirius lives to destroy Harry's sanity, and disrupt classes! [Sirius: HEY!]
CapriceAnn Hedican-Kocur: I know . . . It sucks so much Sirius had to die. He only lasted 2 books. sigh well, I'd be happy if they revive Sirius, but I doubt it.
Fallen Dragon: I did read it. Isn't it so sad Sirius had to die? *wails* and Sirius was my favorite!
Lady Phoenix Gryffindor: You're right. There were rumors all around that Hagrid or Dumbledore would die, but she just HAD to kill of Sirius. It's a disruption to the fanfic community!
anon: Thanks for reviewing lots and lots!
Ami: Thanks for adding me to your favorites!
Robby Kujo: Really? That is some twisted fate. Kubo?
Aimee: See? I updated! And you better review this time, who do you think I'm typing this for? (Ok, so maybe not)
**************************************************************************** *
The seventh year Gryffindors and Slytherins were sitting at their desks, talking and laughing and gossiping about the new teacher.
"I don't know . . . There's a rumor that the new assistants real name is Sirius Spinelli!" Peter exclaimed to the Marauders.
"Cool, Sirius, you have the same name as the assistant." Remus remarked, looking over his essay.
"Really? COOL! Everyone, bow down before the all mighty assistant- professor!" Sirius boasted, standing up and bowing.
James rolled his eyes. "Puh-lease, Sirius. Sit down. Anyway, got the Filbusters Fireworks?"
"Gotcha, mate!" Sirius said with a grin.
Suddenly, there was a BANG and a few screams.
"SIRIUS! Why'd you let them out-?"
"I didn't! See, I have them here!" Sirius exclaimed, showing James his Fireworks.
"Then who-?"
"SIRIUS! GET OVER HERE RIGHT NOW, YOU MORON!"
The whole class turned towards Harry, who had just entered, fuming.
"But I didn't-" Sirius tried to say, but Harry kept on yelling.
"YOU -PROMISED- THAT YOU WOULDN'T CAUSE ANY TROUBLE! GET OUT HERE AT ONCE!"
There was a swish and a huge THUD as a cloud of smoke filled the room.
"What the-?"
"Sorry, sorry, Harry dude. Go easy. I just wanted to cheer up the whole class . . ."
"YOU WILL NOT! I HAVE A LESSON TO TEACH HERE, YOU DOG!"
Sirius straightened up and dusted himself. "Don't use too much of your voice. And the whole class is watching, too."
Harry stopped and faced the class, his face red. "Sorry." He murmured.
"Today's lessons will be about a study in Voldie." He announced.
There were gasps throughout the class.
"Did he just call you-know-who Voldie-?"
"A study in YOU-KNOW-WHO?"
"Silence!" Harry said, and the whole class quieted down.
"Now, does anyone know Voldie's real name?"
There were murmurs throughout the class, but no one dared to raise a hand.
"No one?" Harry asked, raising an eyebrow.
Slowly, and very quietly, Lily raised her hand. "Riddle. His real name is Riddle."
Harry grinned and applauded. "Very well! Three points for Gryffindor! Yes, his name is- was- Tom Marvolo Riddle. You see, he hated that name because he was named after his muggle father. You know how he hates muggles, right?"
There were shudders as everyone nodded slowly.
"Well, let me teach you a cool trick."
Harry raised his wand and spelled out:
'Tom Marvolo Riddle'
Everyone exchanged puzzled glances.
Then, Harry slowly rearranged the letters. There was another round of gasps as they saw what the letters had become.
'I am Voldemort'
"Sweet, isn't it?" Harry asked with a lopsided grin.
"Now, Simon, I want you to write the stuff I want you to write, and you know what to write, don't you? And-"
Harry flicked his wand and Sirius' wand was in his hand, and Sirius was holding a piece of chalk.
Sirius' jaws dropped when he saw the feeble chalk. "WHAT? Chalk? Why do I have to write with a stinking CHALK?"
Harry grinned mischievously. "Your punishment for setting off the fireworks. Write in neat letters, please. Make them readable for once."
Sirius groaned as he faced the board. He immediately began to write.
'A Study in the Dork Lord'
There were muffled giggles from the class.
Hestia Jones raised her hand. "Yes, Miss Jones?" Harry asked.
"I think Professor Kubo misspelled a word."
There were more giggles.
Harry turner around and read the title. "I don't see anything wrong, Miss Jones. Will you kindly point it out for me?"
Jones looked totally clueless. "But- but- isn't it supposed to be D-A-R-K, not D-O-R-K?"
James couldn't contain his laughter. "The DORK Lord! Oh my gosh! The DORK LORD!"
Sirius joined his in his laughing spree as well.
Harry quirked an eyebrow. "Mr. Potter, Mr. Black, and everyone else, isn't Voldie a Dork?"
The whole class burst into laughter except for the Slytherins, who were quite frowning.
"As you know, Voldie has many names he has been called. A few are Voldie, Voldemort, or the Dork Lord." Harry announced. "Write this down, please, Simon."
"Can everyone tell me every name Voldie is called?"
The class went on successfully, and the blackboard ended up like this: (much to Sirius' dismay because of his sore hand)
*******************************************
'A Study in the Dork Lord
*Names the Dork Lord has been called before.
-Voldemort
-Voldie
-Dark Lord
-Master
-Dork Lord
-You-Know-Who
-He-Who's-Name-Must-Be-Hyphenated
-He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named
-Baldie
-Punk
-Villain
-Ice Cream Lover
-Tom Marvolo Riddle
-Tommy
-Parselmouth
*Possible Reasons On Why Voldie decided to become evil
-His father (Evans) [HARRY: POSSIBLE. VERY POSSIBLE.]
-Because he hated muggles (Malfoy) [HARRY: WELL, MAYBE, BUT WE SHOULDN'T HATE MUGGLE TOO, YOU KNOW.]
-His passion for Dark Arts (Snape) [SIRIUS: ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF, SNAPE?]
-An evil spirit of a long lost villain seeking revenge (?) possessed Voldie (Black) [MALFOY: YEAH, RIGHT. WHO? SALAZAR SLYTHERIN? OR MAYBE SOME PIXIES WHO WERE KILLED BY MUGGLES?]
-He was a Parselmouth (Avery) [SIMON: TELL ME, AVERY, WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH EVIL?]
-He was treated badly by the muggles. (Jones) [HARRY: RIGHT ON, MISS JONES. THAT'S THE MOST LIKELY REASON.]
-Someone came and scouted him to join him to conquer the world, but Voldie killed him and decided to take over the world by himself. (Potter) [SIRIUS: YEAH, WHO SCOUTED HIM? THE GIRL SCOUTS?]
-All this killing was only meant for one person, like Dumbledore. But Voldie wanted to disguise the attacks so it looked like he was just killing off random people, much like the 'ABC Murder' by Agatha Christy. (Mc Claire) [SNAPE: YOU READ TOO MUCH MUGGLE NOVELS!]
*History of the Dork Lord
I hope you were listening to the Professor, 'cause no way am I going to copy that all down.
*Profile of the Dark Lord
Name: Tom Marvolo Riddle or Voldemort
Age: Unknown, but at least 67 years old 'cause he was around when the Chamber of Secrets were opened.
Hair color: Used to be black, but he's probably bald right now. (Get it? BALDIE!)
Eye color: No one knows, but it's probably red.
Family: He had a dad and mum, but his mum died giving birth to him and he killed his own dad.
Living: Somewhere. No one knows. If we knew, there would be no trouble catching him.
Wand made of: Hornbeam and phoenix feather
Some other stuff: A Parselmouth, likes killing muggles, scared of Dumbledore.
*Homework for next time
-12 inches essay about the History of the Dark Lord. I HOPE YOU TOOK NOTES! Due next Thursday.
***********************************
"You are excused." Harry said to the class.
Immediately, the whole class began chattering loudly, as if someone just switched off the mute button.
Harry turned towards Sirius, crossing his arms. "SIMON . . . You are so dead. Why did you have to set off those damn things? And-"
He pointed towards the board. "It looks like your talking, or your having a chat session. You didn't have to add in the snide comments too, you know. Sheesh. You can't even write down the boards properly!"
Sirius grinned. "I really had to . . . I love pranks, and you know that. And why did you have to make me write the board in the muggle way? I had to use a damn -stool- to reach the top!"
Harry smiled and wiggled a finger in his face. "You need discipline, dear Padfoot. And I'll be happy to give you my own original detention . . . BEWARE!"
Sirius laughed. "Geez, it seems like Harry is teaching me, when I'm supposed to be teaching you! And I just remembered, when I set off those fireworks, you came in yelling for Sirius, instead of Simon. Poor little me was scared half out of his wits."
Harry went red. "Oops. Have to begin calling you Simon all the time, eh? Well, let's get on. We've got more stuff to do. Not to mention our growling stomachs."
Sirius quickly agreed and together, they walked towards the Great Hall.
*****************************************************
Shorter chapter, but wanted to update^^ Well, review!