Thank all of you beautiful people for the nice reviews!
S. Malfoy - I've always thought Harry's voice should sound like the antithesis of himself which is, duh, Draco. I'm glad you liked it.
OpenOnyxEyes - Oh, thanks so much! I was fearing that perhaps I was portraying Sev too lightly. I'm trying to accomplish him in a sort of weary, vulnerable fashion and it's good to here that I'm succeeding!
HPSlashfan4evr - Yes, I am so tired of the "poor mistreated Potter" stories that I just had to write one with my dear angsty Sev ::pats Sev's head::
Mookins - Ha! I told you! ::ahem:: I'm glad you think I'm sarcastic and amusing. That makes me smile ::smiles:: Anywho, I will try and write a bit more of Hermione if you like, although you might want to read my latest author's note :) And yes, I will be writing more of Sev's interactions with the rest of the teachers. Are you happy now?
Author's Note: I'm sorry if I seem to be skipping around a lot, but I try to keep my focus on the main of the story, which is this little Sev and Harry thing I'm building up. To be quite honest, I can't stand writing about the Golden Trio and it irks me to do so. It's not that I'm trying to leave out details and what not, but that I'm so overly detailed sometimes ... that when I start going off about unimportant characters, it really takes away from the story. So... if you're one of those people who just absolutely adore reading about the Trio, then this write is not for you. I'm sorry. Go read one of those poor mistreated Harry drabbles and leave the rest of us to our dirty work. Enjoy!
Chapter Two: Insomnia
You're lying awake
the room is different the walls dissolve
replaced by sky
horizon blackening twilight
beckoning
He was covered in sweat, yet shaking as though he were in the middle of a snow storm. His entire body ached, his head pounded and his breath came in short gasps. He trembled, bringing one hand up to cover his face and wipe away the moisture. Curling up on one side, he tried to take deeper breaths and clear his head. He was in his bed, in his room, in Hogwarts. He was not lying in the middle of a stone floor with multiple killing curses being thrown upon him, while innocents screamed in the background. He was not bleeding from the eyes in some dark corner while his mother's screaming voice pierced through his delicate eardrums. He was safe. He was alive.
Wrapping his arms around his thin frame, he tried going back to sleep.
Twenty minutes passed, and Severus found himself staring out the window, finding it impossible to fall asleep with some assistance.
Sitting up, he blinked a few times, the moonlight pricking his night-adjusted eyes. Looking over to his left, he spotted a small vial sitting on his bedside table. The periwinkle coloured liquid inside the glass sparkled, luminescent in the moonlight, and Severus inwardly shuddered. He new what the potion would do to him with a sleeping aid. He knew the feeling of delirium, of floating on a cloud of controlled chaos. He sat, head to one side, staring at the bottle for quite some time before scooting across the bed and grabbing it off the table. Uncorking the vial, he brought it to his lips and a bittersweet aroma assaulted his senses. The natural coldness of the potion traveled down his throat, settling itself deep within his belly, almost as if it were a living creature merely taking it's time on a formulated attack.
Severus, his hands shaking, placed the empty bottle back on the table. Empty. The potion itself was to be used in minuscule amounts, and here he'd gone and downed the whole damn thing. And then ... hearing a weird sort of ticking noise, he looked around to see what exactly was making the noise. Could it be a clock? No, certainly not. If it were, why hadn't he heard it before? Shaking his head, he pulled the covers back over his shaking frame and tried, if not to go to sleep, then to merely rest his weary body.
- 7 hours later -
He blinked wildly at the sudden assault of sunlight to his eyes, very much wanting to curl up in a hole somewhere and rot to death. Of course, this could not be the case and he made his way to the Great Hall, cursing and swearing under his breath.
The potion last night ... it had done something to him. He knew it would ... he knew it would do something strange to him every time he had taken it before. But this time, everything seemed different. The lights seemed bright, the voices of the children seemed louder, the pounding is head seemed more painful ... his aches, his pains, his woes; everything seemed inexplicably more prominent. It's as if the effects of the potion didn't wear off, as they usually did.
Walking through the throng of children was like Moses, parting the Sea. The children shrank back from him as if he were some vile sort of walking disease that was highly contagious and a mere breath would send you into a perilous fight between life and death. Not that it mattered much to Severus; the sooner he got to the table, the better. He didn't need a bunch of half-witted kids blocking his path, and clouding his mind with the incessant ramblings of teenage life. That was the last thing he needed.
Seating himself down at the table, he immediately grabbed the pitcher of coffee, and pouring himself a large mug full, he realized the shake of his hands. Apparently, others had noticed as well for he noted that he was getting quite the queer sidelong glances from Professors Dumbledore and Lupin. He mentally shrugged them off, wanting to focus less on their annoying habit of prying into his life and more on just how in the Hell he was supposed to get through the day in the state that he was in.
Taking a sip from his steaming mug, he thought of all the possible headaches that could happen today. First year potions: need I say more? Syltherin double potions with Gryffindor: bleeding hearts! Not only was he going to have to deal with dimwitted first years, but on top of that ... dim witted sixth years! 'Woo-fucking-hoo' he thought, swallowing the rest of his black coffee in three quick gulps. Bringing the mug down from his mouth, he noticed a twitch in his eye. Smirking a bit, he set the mug down carefully and proceeded to stare off into space as his eye twitched spasmodically. Call Severus what you will, but he was never one to pass up the
opportunity to forget all necessary surroundings and focus on a good eye twitching. He often wished he was infonet of a mirror
when this sort of thing happened, just to see if it was noticeable by anyone else. 'Perhaps if I transfigured the coffee mug into a mirror...' But alas, as soon as the thought came to his mind his eye stopped it's movement, and thus ending Severus's morning amusement.
Looking around to see if anyone had caught his childish antics, he sighed as everyone was busily enraptured with each others conversations. He seemed to be sighing a great deal more these days. Sighs of regret, sorrow, restlessness ... but this was no
time for philosophical thinking. The children began to clear out of the Hall, making their way to their first classes. The teachers began to do such as well, and Severus thought he'd better follow suit
-----
Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath in. A deep breath out. And repeated. Opening his eyes, and balling his hands into fists, he continued his slow breathing, trying to get his ragging mind and rising temper under control. Surely the kids were getting exponentially stupider as the years progressed, for he didn't think that anyone could be more clumsy than Longbottom. But, alas, here was a whole room full of them! They never stopped their gibbering, they rarely ever did anything right ... and what's more, they seemed to be put on this giant ball of blue dirt called Earth solely to irritate the living Hell out of the Potions Master.
Taking one more deep breath, he stood up and thereby silencing the entire class with one sharp glare. 'Keep your cool, Severus. We don't want to get thrown out of the school for the murder of an entire class, now do we?' his inner voice asked. Rolling his
eyes, he began to speak in that deep, silky voice that has so single-handedly scared the new children out of their wits. 'Ha, what wits?'
"I'm not going to tolerate anymore stupidity out of this class. If you know what you're doing in this assignment, than continue. If not, then please, leave my classroom. Now." And with that, he sat back down in his chair, staring straight ahead.
The children, looking back and forth amongst themselves, saw this as a perfect opportunity to flee the menacing company of the Potions Master. Gathering up their school supplies, they cleaned up and left the class room in record time. Severus, still staring straight ahead, inwardly smiled with glee. 'Thank the gods, the little rats are leaving. I'll give them all a half-arsed grade, just forshowing up and leaving with such speed!'
As the last student scurried out the door, and slamming it on their way out, Severus stood up and walked aimlessly about the room. What was he going to do for the next hour and a half before his next class? He could sleep ... ha, that wasn't feasible. He hadn't had a proper night's sleep in ages, so there was no use trying to do such during the day when he couldn't even enjoy it. 'I could clean'
he thought, but then pulled a face. 'I must be getting old if I'm thinking of cleaning during my time off.' Sighing, he laid eyes on the
jumble of potions jars from his 6th years classes. He had already graded them, and for the most part, everyone's turned out all right. So.. what was stopping him? Walking over to the counter, he uncorked one vial and brought it quickly to his lips. Placing it down quite
carefully, and quite empty, he picked up a second and drank that as well. By the time he got to his third and forth bottle, he no longer
cared where the empty bottles ended up so long as they were out of his way. Before he knew what had hit him, he had emptied every
single vial. Shuddering and walking over to his desk, his last coherent thought was 'It could have used some sugar....'
-----
The first year children Severus had sent out of class meandered about the school, deciding what to do. One of the children who was elected "the Leader" suggested they go to their Commons and wait fot the next round of classes to start. Unanimously deciding that that was a good idea, they all made their way en masse to their common rooms.
Turning a corner, the students in the front of the group nearly ran into the Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore.
"What are all you children doing out of class?" he asked, not really angry but more curious than anything. None of the children answered, as they were still young and awestruck by the sheer atmosphere that surrounded the Headmaster. "Well?"
"Please sir," a voice called out from the back, "Professor Snape sent us out of class. He was in an awfully foul mood this morning, more than usual! And ... he told us that if we didn't understand what we were to be doing in his class, then we should leave."
The mass of children all nodded and muttered in agreement. Albus stood in place for a second, thinking. The, clapping his hands, he
nodded.
"All right then. You children move on to your dormitories, and stay there until your next class begins. I'm sure you won't mind the extra hour and half off from classes.... Now move along." With that, the kids all seemed to breath one unanimous sigh of relief as the bustled about, making their way past the Headmaster and on to their Commons. Albus, on the other hand, would be walking himself straight down to the dungeons to see just what had gotten the Potions Master so worked up.
.
-----
Ending note: Alright kiddies, there you go. It wasn't my best work, but it was one of those necessasary chapters that you just have to get done before you move on with the story. Sort of like a "filler" except... well, I hope this was atleast a little better than just your average filler chapter. So... tell me what you think and REVIEW! ::ahem:: Now off to start on the next coming chapter. Hints: Albus confronts Severus, and so does Harry! Dun dun dun!
cheers,
- sarah
S. Malfoy - I've always thought Harry's voice should sound like the antithesis of himself which is, duh, Draco. I'm glad you liked it.
OpenOnyxEyes - Oh, thanks so much! I was fearing that perhaps I was portraying Sev too lightly. I'm trying to accomplish him in a sort of weary, vulnerable fashion and it's good to here that I'm succeeding!
HPSlashfan4evr - Yes, I am so tired of the "poor mistreated Potter" stories that I just had to write one with my dear angsty Sev ::pats Sev's head::
Mookins - Ha! I told you! ::ahem:: I'm glad you think I'm sarcastic and amusing. That makes me smile ::smiles:: Anywho, I will try and write a bit more of Hermione if you like, although you might want to read my latest author's note :) And yes, I will be writing more of Sev's interactions with the rest of the teachers. Are you happy now?
Author's Note: I'm sorry if I seem to be skipping around a lot, but I try to keep my focus on the main of the story, which is this little Sev and Harry thing I'm building up. To be quite honest, I can't stand writing about the Golden Trio and it irks me to do so. It's not that I'm trying to leave out details and what not, but that I'm so overly detailed sometimes ... that when I start going off about unimportant characters, it really takes away from the story. So... if you're one of those people who just absolutely adore reading about the Trio, then this write is not for you. I'm sorry. Go read one of those poor mistreated Harry drabbles and leave the rest of us to our dirty work. Enjoy!
Chapter Two: Insomnia
You're lying awake
the room is different the walls dissolve
replaced by sky
horizon blackening twilight
beckoning
He was covered in sweat, yet shaking as though he were in the middle of a snow storm. His entire body ached, his head pounded and his breath came in short gasps. He trembled, bringing one hand up to cover his face and wipe away the moisture. Curling up on one side, he tried to take deeper breaths and clear his head. He was in his bed, in his room, in Hogwarts. He was not lying in the middle of a stone floor with multiple killing curses being thrown upon him, while innocents screamed in the background. He was not bleeding from the eyes in some dark corner while his mother's screaming voice pierced through his delicate eardrums. He was safe. He was alive.
Wrapping his arms around his thin frame, he tried going back to sleep.
Twenty minutes passed, and Severus found himself staring out the window, finding it impossible to fall asleep with some assistance.
Sitting up, he blinked a few times, the moonlight pricking his night-adjusted eyes. Looking over to his left, he spotted a small vial sitting on his bedside table. The periwinkle coloured liquid inside the glass sparkled, luminescent in the moonlight, and Severus inwardly shuddered. He new what the potion would do to him with a sleeping aid. He knew the feeling of delirium, of floating on a cloud of controlled chaos. He sat, head to one side, staring at the bottle for quite some time before scooting across the bed and grabbing it off the table. Uncorking the vial, he brought it to his lips and a bittersweet aroma assaulted his senses. The natural coldness of the potion traveled down his throat, settling itself deep within his belly, almost as if it were a living creature merely taking it's time on a formulated attack.
Severus, his hands shaking, placed the empty bottle back on the table. Empty. The potion itself was to be used in minuscule amounts, and here he'd gone and downed the whole damn thing. And then ... hearing a weird sort of ticking noise, he looked around to see what exactly was making the noise. Could it be a clock? No, certainly not. If it were, why hadn't he heard it before? Shaking his head, he pulled the covers back over his shaking frame and tried, if not to go to sleep, then to merely rest his weary body.
- 7 hours later -
He blinked wildly at the sudden assault of sunlight to his eyes, very much wanting to curl up in a hole somewhere and rot to death. Of course, this could not be the case and he made his way to the Great Hall, cursing and swearing under his breath.
The potion last night ... it had done something to him. He knew it would ... he knew it would do something strange to him every time he had taken it before. But this time, everything seemed different. The lights seemed bright, the voices of the children seemed louder, the pounding is head seemed more painful ... his aches, his pains, his woes; everything seemed inexplicably more prominent. It's as if the effects of the potion didn't wear off, as they usually did.
Walking through the throng of children was like Moses, parting the Sea. The children shrank back from him as if he were some vile sort of walking disease that was highly contagious and a mere breath would send you into a perilous fight between life and death. Not that it mattered much to Severus; the sooner he got to the table, the better. He didn't need a bunch of half-witted kids blocking his path, and clouding his mind with the incessant ramblings of teenage life. That was the last thing he needed.
Seating himself down at the table, he immediately grabbed the pitcher of coffee, and pouring himself a large mug full, he realized the shake of his hands. Apparently, others had noticed as well for he noted that he was getting quite the queer sidelong glances from Professors Dumbledore and Lupin. He mentally shrugged them off, wanting to focus less on their annoying habit of prying into his life and more on just how in the Hell he was supposed to get through the day in the state that he was in.
Taking a sip from his steaming mug, he thought of all the possible headaches that could happen today. First year potions: need I say more? Syltherin double potions with Gryffindor: bleeding hearts! Not only was he going to have to deal with dimwitted first years, but on top of that ... dim witted sixth years! 'Woo-fucking-hoo' he thought, swallowing the rest of his black coffee in three quick gulps. Bringing the mug down from his mouth, he noticed a twitch in his eye. Smirking a bit, he set the mug down carefully and proceeded to stare off into space as his eye twitched spasmodically. Call Severus what you will, but he was never one to pass up the
opportunity to forget all necessary surroundings and focus on a good eye twitching. He often wished he was infonet of a mirror
when this sort of thing happened, just to see if it was noticeable by anyone else. 'Perhaps if I transfigured the coffee mug into a mirror...' But alas, as soon as the thought came to his mind his eye stopped it's movement, and thus ending Severus's morning amusement.
Looking around to see if anyone had caught his childish antics, he sighed as everyone was busily enraptured with each others conversations. He seemed to be sighing a great deal more these days. Sighs of regret, sorrow, restlessness ... but this was no
time for philosophical thinking. The children began to clear out of the Hall, making their way to their first classes. The teachers began to do such as well, and Severus thought he'd better follow suit
-----
Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath in. A deep breath out. And repeated. Opening his eyes, and balling his hands into fists, he continued his slow breathing, trying to get his ragging mind and rising temper under control. Surely the kids were getting exponentially stupider as the years progressed, for he didn't think that anyone could be more clumsy than Longbottom. But, alas, here was a whole room full of them! They never stopped their gibbering, they rarely ever did anything right ... and what's more, they seemed to be put on this giant ball of blue dirt called Earth solely to irritate the living Hell out of the Potions Master.
Taking one more deep breath, he stood up and thereby silencing the entire class with one sharp glare. 'Keep your cool, Severus. We don't want to get thrown out of the school for the murder of an entire class, now do we?' his inner voice asked. Rolling his
eyes, he began to speak in that deep, silky voice that has so single-handedly scared the new children out of their wits. 'Ha, what wits?'
"I'm not going to tolerate anymore stupidity out of this class. If you know what you're doing in this assignment, than continue. If not, then please, leave my classroom. Now." And with that, he sat back down in his chair, staring straight ahead.
The children, looking back and forth amongst themselves, saw this as a perfect opportunity to flee the menacing company of the Potions Master. Gathering up their school supplies, they cleaned up and left the class room in record time. Severus, still staring straight ahead, inwardly smiled with glee. 'Thank the gods, the little rats are leaving. I'll give them all a half-arsed grade, just forshowing up and leaving with such speed!'
As the last student scurried out the door, and slamming it on their way out, Severus stood up and walked aimlessly about the room. What was he going to do for the next hour and a half before his next class? He could sleep ... ha, that wasn't feasible. He hadn't had a proper night's sleep in ages, so there was no use trying to do such during the day when he couldn't even enjoy it. 'I could clean'
he thought, but then pulled a face. 'I must be getting old if I'm thinking of cleaning during my time off.' Sighing, he laid eyes on the
jumble of potions jars from his 6th years classes. He had already graded them, and for the most part, everyone's turned out all right. So.. what was stopping him? Walking over to the counter, he uncorked one vial and brought it quickly to his lips. Placing it down quite
carefully, and quite empty, he picked up a second and drank that as well. By the time he got to his third and forth bottle, he no longer
cared where the empty bottles ended up so long as they were out of his way. Before he knew what had hit him, he had emptied every
single vial. Shuddering and walking over to his desk, his last coherent thought was 'It could have used some sugar....'
-----
The first year children Severus had sent out of class meandered about the school, deciding what to do. One of the children who was elected "the Leader" suggested they go to their Commons and wait fot the next round of classes to start. Unanimously deciding that that was a good idea, they all made their way en masse to their common rooms.
Turning a corner, the students in the front of the group nearly ran into the Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore.
"What are all you children doing out of class?" he asked, not really angry but more curious than anything. None of the children answered, as they were still young and awestruck by the sheer atmosphere that surrounded the Headmaster. "Well?"
"Please sir," a voice called out from the back, "Professor Snape sent us out of class. He was in an awfully foul mood this morning, more than usual! And ... he told us that if we didn't understand what we were to be doing in his class, then we should leave."
The mass of children all nodded and muttered in agreement. Albus stood in place for a second, thinking. The, clapping his hands, he
nodded.
"All right then. You children move on to your dormitories, and stay there until your next class begins. I'm sure you won't mind the extra hour and half off from classes.... Now move along." With that, the kids all seemed to breath one unanimous sigh of relief as the bustled about, making their way past the Headmaster and on to their Commons. Albus, on the other hand, would be walking himself straight down to the dungeons to see just what had gotten the Potions Master so worked up.
.
-----
Ending note: Alright kiddies, there you go. It wasn't my best work, but it was one of those necessasary chapters that you just have to get done before you move on with the story. Sort of like a "filler" except... well, I hope this was atleast a little better than just your average filler chapter. So... tell me what you think and REVIEW! ::ahem:: Now off to start on the next coming chapter. Hints: Albus confronts Severus, and so does Harry! Dun dun dun!
cheers,
- sarah