Here it is: The next installment. I'm on spring break, so I'm having a lot
of time to write, I hope you enjoy.
Warning: Emotional content ensues, it may be a bit out of character, but I'll try not to keep it up.
Please review if you so choose... but try and be nice! Thanks!
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"The last thing I remember hearing was the flat line of my sister." He paused for a moment, caught up in the emotional story he was retelling. "When I woke up I had a hard time remembering where I was. I kept asking for my sister, for my mother, for my father, but the nurses just stared at me."
He had a distant look in his eyes now, as though he was trying to escape the pain by putting it in the farthest realms of his mind. Elizabeth, still holding his hand, watched him intently as he tried his hardest to recount the tale.
"No one would tell me anything" he continued "not where my sister was, not where my parents were, they all just kept staring. I could see it in their eyes." He stopped now, coming out of the reverie he was lost in.
Elizabeth looked at him, he was no longer distant, but, she could see, he was still trying to keep his emotions in check. He didn't want her to see him hurt.
He wasn't continuing, and Elizabeth knew that he wouldn't unless she prompted him.
"What did you see in their eyes?" she questioned, though she feared she already knew the answer.
"Pity." He said simply. "I saw pity in the eyes of everyone that entered my room. The nurses all looked at me with such sorrow in their eyes, and all the while I kept asking for someone, anyone, to come and hold my hand." He halted the words here, and looked down at Elizabeth's hand holding on tightly to his.
He now realized that though the pain was heavy, and though the pain was hard, he now had someone to hold his hand. And that was the only thing the 12 year old Robert Romano had wanted.
He made up his mind to see this on through, so he continued, with renewed emotion, as he realized he wasn't alone. That Elizabeth wouldn't condemn him for what happened. Maybe she was a friend after all.
"I waited. I waited and waited and waited. For how long, I don't know. But I kept waiting for someone to come and tell me that everything was all right, that everything would be fine. I'm sure it was only a few minutes, but it seemed like forever until the doctor walked into the room. And I knew, I knew exactly what he was going to say. He didn't even have to say it... I knew. And I think he knew that I knew. But it was a formality, he had to say it." He looked at Elizabeth, then down at their hands again. "I didn't want to listen, and I tried to scream, to stop him from saying it. Somewhere inside I think that I believed that if he never said it, it wouldn't be true. That I would wake up from the horrible dream I was having and everything would be all right. But nothing came out. I tried to scream, but I couldn't. So I heard him. I heard everything he said..." he trailed off.
The tears had returned to his eyes as he remembered that scared little boy waiting in the hospital bed for the good news that would never come.
"Everyone was dead." He concluded. "Everyone. My sister, my mother, my father... I was the only one that survived." He said as tears rolled down his cheeks. "and that," he laughed wryly, "as why I am the asshole that sits before you today", he said as the tears continued to flow freely down his cheek.
He swiped at them, trying to make them go away, but they just kept coming.
'damn' he thought as he brought his free hand to his face. He wasn't going to let go of Elizabeth's hand, he needed to hold on.
But he couldn't look at her. He couldn't look at her beautiful face full of pity. The one thing he didn't want from her. Love, kindness, mercy... love... everything except pity was what he wanted for her.
"Robert." She said gently, "Look at me."
But he couldn't bring himself to look at her. Somewhere inside, though Elizabeth knew. She knew he didn't want her pity, and that's not what she was going to give him.
Suddenly Robert felt a tear land on his hand, the one holding Elizabeth's, and he realized that it wasn't his. His shock caused him to look at Elizabeth's face, and though he did not want to, he locked eyes with her.
She didn't say anything, she didn't need to... her misty eyes conveyed it all. He didn't see pity in her eyes, but compassion. And in her beautiful face he saw the friend he'd so desperately wanted.
"Robert." She said again, softly, as she brought his hand to her face and kissed it gently.
"Yeah, well." He stated with a half smile.
"I am sorry." She offered.
"Nah, don't be." He said, "I'm fine."
"Robert, you're not fine, and I'd wish you'd stop saying that."
Romano was sitting there, raw with emotion... but he couldn't help but think that all Elizabeth felt for him was pity.
"Elizabeth, don't pity me." He said coldly.
"Robert, I don't pity you." She said softly, trying to make him understand.
"Elizabeth, stop." Romano said tightly, he was done with the waterworks, and the emotional display, "I know that my story is sad and heartbreaking, but I don't want your damn pity."
Elizabeth was incredulous. She didn't know how this man could go from completely emotional one minute to utterly emotionless the next.
But it pissed her off. She wasn't angry AT him, but damn, this was getting to be too much.
"Well, it's a good thing you don't want my damn pity Robert, because that's not what you have. You have my sympathy, my empathy, my care... my friendship." She said.
"Elizabeth, sympathy, empathy... all forms of pity." He took his hand out of hers and rubbed his temples.
"Robert, will you stop trying to push me away? I want to help you through this."
"I am through this Elizabeth." He said as he began to get up.
"No you're not Robert. You are anything but through this. You haven't talked to anyone about this in what, 24 years?"
"What the hell difference does that make Elizabeth? I'm strong."
"I know you're strong Robert, but this is not a question of strength."
Romano knew he was acting foolish, but he had no choice but to push Elizabeth away. She wanted friendship... he had love. And, though somewhere deep inside, he knew it wasn't true, he believed that Elizabeth held nothing but pity for him. And he didn't want a friendship with the most beautiful woman that had ever walked the earth, out of mere pity.
"No Elizabeth? Then what is this a question of? Integrity? The ability to Cope?"
"I'm not sure it IS a question Robert, but I want to be there for you."
"Be there for me when Lizzie? Look, I just wanted you to know why it is that I am the person that I am. I don't expect you to magically think of me as a wonderful person; I'm not. I don't expect you to defend me to your colleagues; I don't deserve it. I just thought you should know."
"I do know now Robert, so why are you pushing you away?"
"Because, Elizabeth, you only want to be there because of my past." He said as he threw a five onto the table, "and I don't want that."
'and because I love you, but I know that you could never hold those types of feelings for me' he thought to himself as he walked out the door into the brisk Chicago air.
Elizabeth sat stunned at the table in the diner... what had just happened? Robert Romano had gone from hot to cold in a matter of seconds.
She should go after him, she thought. But she didn't. She was too shell- shocked, she didn't know what to say.
'But,' she thought, 'this isn't over.'
And, in the famous words of Scarlett O'Hara, Elizabeth Corday proclaimed: "Tomorrow is another day."
And she would be there for Robert, even if he didn't want her to be.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Well, there it was... Chapter 5. Will Elizabeth be able to get through to Romano?? Will Romano be able to avoid Corday? Will Robert ever tell Elizabeth how he feels about her? Will she feel the same way???
Tune in next time to find out.
*By the way: Please don't be angry that I made Romano so emotional, or that I made him go from hot to cold in seconds. It just can't end here. And I think we all know that Romano would try immediately to put up his defenses again.... ASAP... so, please forgive me!
And review it if you so choose.
Warning: Emotional content ensues, it may be a bit out of character, but I'll try not to keep it up.
Please review if you so choose... but try and be nice! Thanks!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"The last thing I remember hearing was the flat line of my sister." He paused for a moment, caught up in the emotional story he was retelling. "When I woke up I had a hard time remembering where I was. I kept asking for my sister, for my mother, for my father, but the nurses just stared at me."
He had a distant look in his eyes now, as though he was trying to escape the pain by putting it in the farthest realms of his mind. Elizabeth, still holding his hand, watched him intently as he tried his hardest to recount the tale.
"No one would tell me anything" he continued "not where my sister was, not where my parents were, they all just kept staring. I could see it in their eyes." He stopped now, coming out of the reverie he was lost in.
Elizabeth looked at him, he was no longer distant, but, she could see, he was still trying to keep his emotions in check. He didn't want her to see him hurt.
He wasn't continuing, and Elizabeth knew that he wouldn't unless she prompted him.
"What did you see in their eyes?" she questioned, though she feared she already knew the answer.
"Pity." He said simply. "I saw pity in the eyes of everyone that entered my room. The nurses all looked at me with such sorrow in their eyes, and all the while I kept asking for someone, anyone, to come and hold my hand." He halted the words here, and looked down at Elizabeth's hand holding on tightly to his.
He now realized that though the pain was heavy, and though the pain was hard, he now had someone to hold his hand. And that was the only thing the 12 year old Robert Romano had wanted.
He made up his mind to see this on through, so he continued, with renewed emotion, as he realized he wasn't alone. That Elizabeth wouldn't condemn him for what happened. Maybe she was a friend after all.
"I waited. I waited and waited and waited. For how long, I don't know. But I kept waiting for someone to come and tell me that everything was all right, that everything would be fine. I'm sure it was only a few minutes, but it seemed like forever until the doctor walked into the room. And I knew, I knew exactly what he was going to say. He didn't even have to say it... I knew. And I think he knew that I knew. But it was a formality, he had to say it." He looked at Elizabeth, then down at their hands again. "I didn't want to listen, and I tried to scream, to stop him from saying it. Somewhere inside I think that I believed that if he never said it, it wouldn't be true. That I would wake up from the horrible dream I was having and everything would be all right. But nothing came out. I tried to scream, but I couldn't. So I heard him. I heard everything he said..." he trailed off.
The tears had returned to his eyes as he remembered that scared little boy waiting in the hospital bed for the good news that would never come.
"Everyone was dead." He concluded. "Everyone. My sister, my mother, my father... I was the only one that survived." He said as tears rolled down his cheeks. "and that," he laughed wryly, "as why I am the asshole that sits before you today", he said as the tears continued to flow freely down his cheek.
He swiped at them, trying to make them go away, but they just kept coming.
'damn' he thought as he brought his free hand to his face. He wasn't going to let go of Elizabeth's hand, he needed to hold on.
But he couldn't look at her. He couldn't look at her beautiful face full of pity. The one thing he didn't want from her. Love, kindness, mercy... love... everything except pity was what he wanted for her.
"Robert." She said gently, "Look at me."
But he couldn't bring himself to look at her. Somewhere inside, though Elizabeth knew. She knew he didn't want her pity, and that's not what she was going to give him.
Suddenly Robert felt a tear land on his hand, the one holding Elizabeth's, and he realized that it wasn't his. His shock caused him to look at Elizabeth's face, and though he did not want to, he locked eyes with her.
She didn't say anything, she didn't need to... her misty eyes conveyed it all. He didn't see pity in her eyes, but compassion. And in her beautiful face he saw the friend he'd so desperately wanted.
"Robert." She said again, softly, as she brought his hand to her face and kissed it gently.
"Yeah, well." He stated with a half smile.
"I am sorry." She offered.
"Nah, don't be." He said, "I'm fine."
"Robert, you're not fine, and I'd wish you'd stop saying that."
Romano was sitting there, raw with emotion... but he couldn't help but think that all Elizabeth felt for him was pity.
"Elizabeth, don't pity me." He said coldly.
"Robert, I don't pity you." She said softly, trying to make him understand.
"Elizabeth, stop." Romano said tightly, he was done with the waterworks, and the emotional display, "I know that my story is sad and heartbreaking, but I don't want your damn pity."
Elizabeth was incredulous. She didn't know how this man could go from completely emotional one minute to utterly emotionless the next.
But it pissed her off. She wasn't angry AT him, but damn, this was getting to be too much.
"Well, it's a good thing you don't want my damn pity Robert, because that's not what you have. You have my sympathy, my empathy, my care... my friendship." She said.
"Elizabeth, sympathy, empathy... all forms of pity." He took his hand out of hers and rubbed his temples.
"Robert, will you stop trying to push me away? I want to help you through this."
"I am through this Elizabeth." He said as he began to get up.
"No you're not Robert. You are anything but through this. You haven't talked to anyone about this in what, 24 years?"
"What the hell difference does that make Elizabeth? I'm strong."
"I know you're strong Robert, but this is not a question of strength."
Romano knew he was acting foolish, but he had no choice but to push Elizabeth away. She wanted friendship... he had love. And, though somewhere deep inside, he knew it wasn't true, he believed that Elizabeth held nothing but pity for him. And he didn't want a friendship with the most beautiful woman that had ever walked the earth, out of mere pity.
"No Elizabeth? Then what is this a question of? Integrity? The ability to Cope?"
"I'm not sure it IS a question Robert, but I want to be there for you."
"Be there for me when Lizzie? Look, I just wanted you to know why it is that I am the person that I am. I don't expect you to magically think of me as a wonderful person; I'm not. I don't expect you to defend me to your colleagues; I don't deserve it. I just thought you should know."
"I do know now Robert, so why are you pushing you away?"
"Because, Elizabeth, you only want to be there because of my past." He said as he threw a five onto the table, "and I don't want that."
'and because I love you, but I know that you could never hold those types of feelings for me' he thought to himself as he walked out the door into the brisk Chicago air.
Elizabeth sat stunned at the table in the diner... what had just happened? Robert Romano had gone from hot to cold in a matter of seconds.
She should go after him, she thought. But she didn't. She was too shell- shocked, she didn't know what to say.
'But,' she thought, 'this isn't over.'
And, in the famous words of Scarlett O'Hara, Elizabeth Corday proclaimed: "Tomorrow is another day."
And she would be there for Robert, even if he didn't want her to be.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Well, there it was... Chapter 5. Will Elizabeth be able to get through to Romano?? Will Romano be able to avoid Corday? Will Robert ever tell Elizabeth how he feels about her? Will she feel the same way???
Tune in next time to find out.
*By the way: Please don't be angry that I made Romano so emotional, or that I made him go from hot to cold in seconds. It just can't end here. And I think we all know that Romano would try immediately to put up his defenses again.... ASAP... so, please forgive me!
And review it if you so choose.