L-chan's notes: Many thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far.

Disclaimer: CCS was created by CLAMP.

Shadows

Chapter 8—Siren

It was a long week for both of them.

Tomoyo and Touya avoided each other as much as they could, considering that they had to see each other at school every day. He didn't treat her any differently in class, still calling on her during lectures and answering her questions during the weekly lab assignment, but she could feel the wall that had gone up between them. When he passed her in the halls, he no longer smiled at her like before, but her heart beat faster anyway. She kept her head down, afraid to meet his eyes, afraid of what she might see there.

It was all his fault. He knew that, but he didn't know how to make it right again. She didn't come up to him after class to arrange for her next piano lesson, so every day he went home to his empty apartment, missing the warmth and life she brought to the small, lonely space. He missed their serious talks over tea and their jokes at the piano. Whenever he played, he could almost feel her sitting there next to him, could see her with her eyes closed as she fell under the music's spell. And every time he looked at his Tomoyo-bear, he pictured her in that green dress, smiling shyly as she held her hair ribbon out to him.

It was all her fault. She didn't know what she was thinking. He was a beautiful, intelligent, experienced older man. Why on earth would he be interested in some silly little high school girl? It was that song that had made him look at her, just for that moment, and she'd naively read too much into it. But that didn't stop her from trying to pick out the tune on the piano in the music room before she rehearsed her solo for the upcoming school festival. She tried to remember the English lyrics, but she only heard his voice, softly singing to her.

Meiling watched all of this with a concerned frown on her face. She hated to see her best friend hurting, and their favorite sensei seemed just as miserable. All week she saw them trying not to look at each other, but they were still so very obvious. Probably not obvious to anyone else, because they didn't know to look for it. But Meiling could tell that they were always aware of each other, and any time their eyes did lock, or they had to speak to each other, she could feel the air crackle. If she was one for bad puns, she'd even go so far as to say that there was definite chemistry between them. She knew she wasn't wrong about this. They were just too afraid to do anything about it.

If only there was something she could do.

-----

"I hope the pictures turn out," Tomoyo said to Meiling as they worked behind the music club's takoyaki booth during Saturday's festival. "That was an amazing gymnastics exhibition you guys put on earlier."

"Of course. We're always amazing." Meiling replied with her typical boastfulness. "And I'm sure they'll turn out just fine, as usual. Make sure I get copies, okay?"

Tomoyo nodded. "Sakura-chan asked for some, too. I'm glad I remembered to bring my new camera."

"Who would've thought there'd ever come a day when you'd have to remember to bring your camera?" Meiling teased.

"I've just had other things on my mind lately," Tomoyo answered softly. When she wasn't spending her time on choir rehearsal or homework, she was thinking about Touya. Well, even when she was doing other things, she was always thinking about him. She tried not to, but somehow everything reminded her of him, which only led to her dwelling on how foolishly she'd acted.

"I know." Meiling checked her watch and tapped her foot impatiently. "Where are Iwahara-san and Fukae-san? They were supposed to relieve us five minutes ago." Their fellow choir members Chika and Kiyomi were not known for their reliability. "We're going to miss it," she added under her breath.

"Miss what?" Tomoyo started to ask when two girls rushed up to the booth.

"We're here," Chika said, panting as if she'd run a couple of laps around the schoolyard before showing up. "I had to help Yamura-sensei set things up in the gym."

Kiyomi nodded, also gasping for breath. "And then she had to come find me. I kind of forgot." She put her hands together and bowed her head in apology. "We're sorry we're going to miss your song, Tomoyo-chan, but we have to stay here until the choir performances are over. Everyone else already had other commitments."

Once again, Tomoyo was about to speak, but Meiling cut her off. "Fine, fine. Just hurry and get settled in, because we need to go."

"Got it. Hey, have you seen the science club's booth?" Chika asked.

"I'd just been by there when you found me," Kiyomi replied. "Poor Kinomoto-sensei. Li-kun is really letting him have it." The two girls continued chatting as they disappeared behind the tent flap to replenish the supplies.

Tomoyo tossed a glance at Meiling. "What was that about? Do you know what's going on?"

Her raven-haired friend nodded as she untied her apron. "We're done here, so let's go watch."

"Watch what?"

"You'll see. Come on."

When they arrived at the science club's booth, quite a crowd had gathered to cheer Syaoran on. "Oh, my," Tomoyo breathed.

Meiling knew she shouldn't laugh, but she couldn't help it. "Apparently this was a senior's idea. He managed to convince their faculty advisor that building a dunk tank would help them understand the practical applications of physics." She giggled again. "I think it was just an excuse to take out their aggressions on some of the science teachers."

Tomoyo was wide-eyed as she studied the scene before her. There were several coins on the table in front of Syaoran, who cocked his arm as he prepared to throw the baseball, and Sakura stood next to him with an armful of plush toys. Touya was sitting on the tank's collapsible bench, wearing black swim shorts and a blue t-shirt that read "Property of Seijou High Science Department". He barely had time to push his dripping hair out of his eyes before the ball hit the target squarely, and he fell into the tank. Tomoyo gasped as the students around her roared again.

"Give someone else a chance, Li," a boy shouted, but Syaoran just pushed another coin forward as the booth attendant handed Sakura another stuffed rabbit.

Tomoyo walked over to her friends. "How long has he been doing this?"

Sakura turned around, her honey-colored ponytail swishing behind her. "Oh, Tomoyo-chan! Syaoran-kun hasn't let anyone else play since Onii-chan's turn in the tank started." She nodded toward the bundle of animals in her arms. "Here, take a rabbit, or two. I can't hold many more."

Tomoyo took a couple of the toys from her overburdened friend. "Has Li-kun missed?" Touya was bound to catch a cold if he was spending more time in the water than out of it.

"Only once. He got distracted when I accidentally dropped all his prizes." Sakura's emotions were mixed over whether she should feel sympathy for her brother or root for her boyfriend. She'd done a pretty good job of managing both. "Hey, Tomoyo-chan, are you going to be singing later?"

Tomoyo nodded, flinching but refusing to look toward the tank when she heard the splash. "Some of us are going to be performing our competition pieces, so I'm a little nervous."

"Here, Daidouji." Syaoran handed her another rabbit when he saw that Sakura had more than she could handle.

"Don't worry, Tomoyo-chan. Your singing is always so lovely. And we'll be there supporting you, right, Syaoran-kun?"

"What? Oh, right. Hey, what's going on?" Syaoran pounded his fists on the table. "I'm not done yet!"

"Sorry, Li," the boy running the booth said as the thoroughly drenched Touya climbed out of the tank. "But Sato-sensei is up next, if you want to keep playing."

"No, thanks." Syaoran shoved the remaining coins back in his pocket and moved aside so some of the other students could finally have a turn.

Tomoyo watched as Touya rubbed his damp hair with a towel. She turned to Meiling, who had been a silent but amused observer for the last several minutes. "Will you hold these for me?" she asked, giving Meiling the rabbits and her camera. "I'll be right back."

She went over to the next booth and bought a large cup of hot coffee. When she walked up to Touya, she thought she saw a flicker of surprise in his brown eyes. "I thought you could use this," she said, handing him the cup.

He was surprised, because Tomoyo hadn't voluntarily spoken to him all week. "Thank you," he said, and he took a long gulp of the steaming liquid. He didn't care that it burned his tongue, because it immediately began warming his chilled bones. "You're a lifesaver." She was still so thoughtful, even after that disastrous afternoon. He didn't know how to be around her anymore, so he'd been avoiding her as well. It didn't take long for an uncomfortable silence to settle over them. "So, how are you?" he asked for lack of anything better to say.

She shrugged, wishing this wasn't so awkward. "I'm fine." But she wasn't. Not really. "How are you?"

Miserable. "Wet." He went to take another drink of the coffee, but he sneezed. "I swear, if I get pneumonia, I'm going to flunk that gaki."

"You should probably go change into some dry clothes." She always knew just how to state the obvious in situations like this. Why can't we talk to each other like we used to?

"Yeah, I've got some inside." He couldn't stand this. I don't know how to explain what I did, but I have to try. "Listen, I—"

"Daidouji-san?" Tomoyo managed to keep a very unladylike curse from escaping her lips as she turned around. She didn't hear the even worse one that Touya was unable to suppress. "Yamura-sensei wants to see you in the gym."

Now I'll never know what he was going to say. "Thanks, Arato-kun," she said to the sophomore boy, who cowered under her unusually icy stare. He had no idea that he'd just interrupted a potentially important conversation. She faced Touya again with apologetic eyes. "I guess I'll see you later." I hope.

"Okay, sure." He watched her go, staring so intently after her that he didn't notice the ruby-eyed girl who had approached him.

"Sensei?" He blinked and wondered how Meiling had just appeared out of nowhere. "We're going to go hear Tomoyo-chan sing. Do you want to come with us?"

She'd mentioned something about that last Sunday, the last time he'd really talked to her. Several choir members were going to be performing as a practice for the upcoming solo competition. She'd been spending extra rehearsal time after school to get the song just right, but she was still a little worried that she wasn't ready to sing it in public. Well, at least she had been last week.

"It would mean a lot to her," Meiling added when Touya didn't say anything.

He didn't think to ask how she knew that. He just knew that he wanted to be there, to show Tomoyo that whatever else may be going on with them, he still cared about her and supported her. His responsibilities for the day were over, and it was only when he sneezed again that he realized he was still in his wet t-shirt and shorts. "I need to change," he finally said. It wasn't really an answer, but Meiling nodded anyway.

"We'll save you a seat." She gave him a knowing smile and what may have been a wink before running to catch up with Sakura and Syaoran on their way to the gym.

Touya finished his coffee as he went inside. He'd left his suit hanging in the faculty break room, and he locked himself in the lavatory to peel off his damp clothes and make himself presentable again. There wasn't much that could be done with his wet hair, so he quickly ran a comb through it and hoped it would behave as it dried. He downed a quick refill of coffee from the always-on pot before heading toward the gym.

The aisle seat next to his sister was empty, and he slid into the chair just as one of the performers was leaving the stage. He cracked a small smile at Sakura's surprised "Hoe?"

"Thanks for holding my seat, kaijuu."

"I am not a kaijuu," she hissed, stomping on his foot. It hurt, but he wouldn't give her the satisfaction of knowing that.

Syaoran leaned around Sakura to scowl at Touya before turning to glare at the girl on his other side. "You mean we were saving that seat for him?"

Meiling just shrugged in that nonchalant way of hers. "It's the least we could do after you tried to drown him." Her cousin muttered something inappropriate but didn't protest further.

Backstage, Tomoyo waited nervously, going through some last-minute breathing exercises as she prepared to go on. She heard the audience applaud politely, and then suddenly Yamura-sensei was introducing her. That was fast. She took one last deep breath and stepped onto the stage.

There was no musical introduction to her piece, so it was up to her to begin the song when she was ready, which would serve as the pianist's cue. She approached the microphone with the same butterflies that always came out of hibernation right before a performance. Butterflies were good—the excitement gave her that extra something necessary to do her best. When the butterflies stopped coming, then it would be time to worry.

She scanned the room quickly, looking for her friends. Their support was just as important as the butterflies. She saw Meiling, who still had her camera and decided to make good use of it; Syaoran, who gave her a thumbs up; Sakura, who smiled and waved; and Touya, whose expression she couldn't read. But at least he was there. He remembered.

She kept her eyes focused on his, using him as her lifeline, as she clasped her hands over her heart and began to sing.

A song about loneliness, about wandering, about needing something. A song about learning, about hope, about finding someone. Her voice started out low, like an intimate whisper, but soared when the song built to the last chorus, putting her own meaning into the song, making it about more than the words someone had written. She believed it, and it was hers. It was hers, and she shared it with everyone so that they could believe it, too.

As far as Touya was concerned, there was no one else in the room at that moment. He was completely captivated by Tomoyo's song, and the rest of the world seemed to disappear. Her voice had matured since the last time he'd heard her sing. It wasn't a little girl's voice anymore. It was a woman's voice—full, rich, and emotional. Passionate. Just like the glow in her violet eyes as she looked at him from the stage. Even when the last note faded, her gaze remained locked with his, and nothing could have made him look away.

"Such a beautiful voice," a woman behind him whispered.

"Like an angel," her friend replied.

No, Touya thought, his dark eyes still fixed on Tomoyo as she bowed modestly in appreciation for the audience's applause. Not like an angel. Like a siren. She could lead a man to his downfall, and he would go willingly.

Syaoran whistled loudly, and Sakura and Meiling clapped enthusiastically as Tomoyo left the stage. "Wasn't that pretty?" Sakura asked her boyfriend. He nodded, and she turned to the chair on her other side. "Hey, Onii-chan—"

But Touya was gone.

-----

"I need to talk to you."

Tomoyo had remained backstage to watch the other performances, making it easy for Touya to find her. Not that she'd expected him to come looking for her. She was actually surprised that he did. He didn't say anything else, so she just nodded and followed him into the hallway.

The first floor of the school was busy, as students and teachers moved in and out of classrooms. Preparations for the big bonfire and closing festivities were underway, and the hallway bustled with activity. No one gave them a second look as they went upstairs to the science wing, which was deserted by comparison.

The jangling of Touya's keys echoed slightly in the empty hallway as he unlocked the door to the chemistry lab. They stepped into the dark room, but he left the lights off, letting the waning sunlight coming through the windows serve as sufficient illumination instead.

He was the one who wanted to talk, so Tomoyo remained silent, waiting for him to say something. Maybe he should have prepared some sort of speech as they were walking upstairs, but instead he blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "What the hell was that?"

She just looked at him for a second. "I don't know what you mean," she said, confusion in her violet eyes.

"The way you were looking at me just then. What was that?"

He was angry. She only managed to make him angry lately, all because she didn't know how to deal with her feelings for him. "I guess I was just caught up in the emotion of the song," she answered slowly. "I didn't mean anything by it."

"You didn't mean anything by it," he repeated. He laughed as he turned away from her, but it was a harsh sound. He stared out the window, down at the frivolous activities happening in the schoolyard. "No, you never do, do you? You look at me like that, and you don't even know what it does to me. And when you oh-so-innocently touch me, you have no idea that it drives me crazy, because you don't mean anything by it." This was coming out all wrong. He was blaming her for the way she made him feel.

So, he did notice her pathetic attempts to get his attention after all. She didn't know it had bothered him so much. "I'm sorry, sensei," she whispered.

"And stop calling me that," he ordered, still with his back to her. "My name is Touya."

"I know that."

"Well, good." He made a notch in the air with his index finger, marking a point on an invisible scoreboard. "That's one thing."

Tomoyo didn't get upset easily, but he was being unfair. And she had to fight back if she didn't want to start crying in front of him. "What is wrong with you?"

Now he faced her, his brown eyes narrowed. "What's wrong is that you've been pushing me, whether you mean to or not, and if you don't stop, then I'm going to... going to..."

"Going to what?" she challenged with a haughty toss of her long hair. She called his bluff, if only to hide her fear of what he might do.

With three quick strides, he was standing right in front of her. "This."

He kissed her.

From the moment his lips touched hers, he felt his anger drain away. His frustration, his confusion were just distant memories. All he could think about was how her lips were softer than rose petals and sweeter than plum wine, just as he knew they would be.

She'd never been kissed before. And she didn't even know how, not really. All she could do was let him kiss her and try to make sense of these amazing feelings that were making her warm all over.

His arms found their way around her waist, and he held her and kissed her like he'd wanted to for so long. But had it only been a month since she first came to his apartment, only a week since he'd almost given in to the temptation to show her how he felt? He still didn't know exactly what it was that he felt, but he knew it was something he had to explore. He couldn't fight it, and he didn't want to. He gently tugged at her lips with his, wishing she would respond somehow and let him know that she felt it, too.

Her arms stayed at her sides. She wanted so desperately to touch him, but she was afraid that if she did, she'd wake up from this dream. She was surprised that she hadn't woken up already—she usually did at this point. But he was still holding her and kissing her, and it never felt this good before, because in her dreams all she could do was imagine what it would be like. She didn't even realize that she was crying until she tasted the saltiness on her lips.

He raised his head and saw the silent tears sliding down her cheeks. "Oh, God," he whispered. "I'm sorry." He tried to wipe away her tears with his thumbs, but they just kept falling. "Oh, God. Don't cry." He tucked a stray lock of lavender hair behind her ear. "Don't cry, Tomoyo."

She couldn't remember him ever using her name before, and she loved the way he said it. She was trembling as she tentatively reached up and placed her hands on his shoulders. He didn't disappear. It wasn't a dream. Her arms wound around his neck, and she lifted her face, knowing that this time, she wouldn't be rejected. "Then don't stop," she answered shakily. "Touya." She didn't mean to be so familiar, but reverting to formalities now would sound ridiculous.

He didn't realize just how much he'd wanted her to call him by his name until he heard it. "God, Tomoyo."

He went to kiss her again, and she met his warm, firm lips with hers. She let him show her how to kiss him. When he nibbled at her lips, she nibbled at his. When he opened his mouth, she did the same. And when his tongue softly rubbed against hers, she held onto him tightly as instinct took over.

It had to be wrong. It felt too damn good. But then, why did holding her in his arms feel so right? He still wasn't ready to call this anything, but it didn't matter now. All that mattered was that whatever it was, she felt it, too.

They were pulled out of time, and nothing existed but them and this moment. As long as they didn't stop, they'd never have to worry about what was happening between them. There would be no consequences, no problems, no decisions.

But it couldn't last forever. The kiss finally ended, and they stood there in the dark classroom, still holding each other, because as soon as they let go, they were going to have to go out and face the world again.

"I meant it," she whispered against his shoulder. "I meant it every time."

"So did I." He rested his cheek against her silky hair and closed his eyes, breathing in that perfume that had haunted him in his dreams. He could hear the evening activities starting up outside, and he knew they had to go, or else they might be missed. They still needed to talk, but that would have to wait. "Will you come over tomorrow?"

She pulled back and looked up into his coffee-brown eyes. He really did have beautiful eyes. "Is that what you want?"

Her violet eyes shimmered with leftover tears and just a hint of laughter. He saw her lips twitching a bit, and he had to smile back at her.

"Yes."