Disclaimer:
Sano: Watsuki owns all characters in Rurouni Kenshin.
Saitou asks with venom laced in his voice: Just who is this Watsuki?
Sano: Just someone who created us. You better not mess with him.
Watsuki: Yes, I created you and I own you.
Saitou glares at him and gets into Gatotsu stance: I am not owned by anyone. Aku-Soku-Zan.
Watsuki smirks and draws something on paper. Next second, Saitou is seen wearing a pink ballerina dress twirling around the room with a rose in his mouth (instead of his usual cigarette.)
Sano looks at Saitou: I told you not to mess with him.
Saitou glares at Sano: Shut up, tori-atama.
Kenshin walks into the room and his mouth drops open at the sight before him.
Saitou: Not a word, Battousai.
Kenshin: Oro?
Author's Notes: This is another all Soujiro/Kaoru chapter =D
~ A Memory Forgotten ~
Chapter 14
Kenshin was getting more and more anxious as the days drew on. They hadn't found any clues about Kaoru's whereabouts since she had been taken from the hideout.
Damn it! Why can't I find her? Maybe I can find some other people to help, de gozaru yo.
He mentally kicked himself for not thinking of this earlier. Kenshin ran to the building, wrote a quick note, and attached it to the pigeon.
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Soujiro paled at the thought of telling Kaoru his past. She's going to hate me, he thought as his stomach rumbled uncomfortably.
Kaoru instantly regretted asking him that question and mentally slapped herself for it. He isn't comfortable with telling me his past, why did I ask him? It probably brings back so many troubled memories. Mou! Kaoru no baka!, she thought as she reprimanded herself. She looked back at Soujiro who was still silent and said apologetically, "Sou-chan, gomen nasai. That was wrong of me to ask you to tell me something that brings back bad memories for you."
Soujiro looked back at the girl. She deserves to know. It would be wrong to deceive her like this, he thought with conviction as he said, "Kaoru-san, you did nothing wrong." He paused as in thought and looked down at his hands imagining the blood on them. His eyes darkened as he continued to speak.
"However . .however, I'm afraid Kaoru-san . .that . . ." he paused again not knowing how to continue how he felt. The boy himself had kept his feelings to himself for so long that, in matter of speaking, he had forgotten how to express his feelings to other people. The thoughts that formed in his mind just couldn't come out of his mouth.
Kaoru looked at the man with compassion and saw how much he was struggling with what he was going to say to her. She took her hand and enveloped his and squeezed gently. Soujiro looked up at her and saw, much to his surprise, a gentle smile decorating her face.
He took a deep breath as he closed his eyes. He compiled all the thoughts that he had in his head and organized in such a way that he would be able to express them to her. Soujiro still felt the warmth of her hand against his and it gave him courage to speak. He took another breath and opened his eyes and saw the familiar pair of blue eyes looking back at him.
"Kaoru-san," he started, "what I tell you about myself now will make you loath me. And I want to apologize to you ahead of time for this. I only wish that we could have met under different circumstances. However, I'm still glad that . .that . . I got to meet you." He looked up at her.
Kaoru was confused by his words, but nevertheless she never removed her hands from his. I don't care who he was in the past, can't he see that?
Soujiro took another deep breath as he began to delve into the story of his past. Kaoru sat next to him, holding his hand throughout his entire tale.
"For the majority of my life, I've lived under the motto: the strong live and the weak die."
"I was an illegitimate child and was taken in by my father's family. After my father passed away, my aunts and uncles treated me as nothing more than a servant, sometimes even worse than one. Whenever I'd make a mistake or if something went wrong with their business, they would vent their anger out on me. After the first couple of times, I started to ignore the pain and began to smile.
I learned that by smiling, they would not hurt me as much." Soujiro tensed up as a barrage of memories flooded into his mind. It's in the past, he thought as he reassured himself. Then he felt pressure on his hands. He looked down and saw that Kaoru still had her hands tightly wrapped around his own.
"One day, I met a man. He taught me that the strong live in this world and they feed off of the weak. He gave me my first sword. And that night . . that night . . my family .. they found out about him and questioned me. . .they . .they wouldn't stop hurting me once they knew that I had hid him. I didn't know what to do so I ran . .and ran. I wanted to find the man who I had helped, but he was nowhere to be found. I hid underneath the house and had the sword in my hand.
It was then that my uncle found me . . . and crawled over to me. I was so scared . . It happened so fast. Everything became a blur. It was with that sword that . .that .. I killed my family." Kaoru sucked in her breath. Her heart ached for the young man that was sitting next to her. She felt the tears coming into her eyes.
Soujiro didn't dare look up at her, he was afraid of what he would see in those innocent blue eyes of hers. He didn't want to see the fear or disgust in those eyes that he had began to love and find comfort in. . so he continued on with his story.
"That man raised me and under him I became known as Tenken. I was one of the strong, not the weak and I proved it to him and myself by fulfilling each of the missions that he had laid out for me. Our group .. we were set out to make a new Japan . . a Japan that would be ruled by the strong.
However . . however, we encountered another man .. another ex-hitokiri like the man who had raised me. He was considered to be the strongest ever since the Bakumatsu. I fought with him.
He confused me. He believed in protecting the weak. How could two hitokiris who came out of the war end up so differently? It was during that fight, that my entire . . my entire belief system in life broke in pieces. In the end, he defeated me without killing me, and he allowed me to go on and start a new life.
It was then that I decided that I would become a rurouni and wander throughout Japan. I wanted to be able to find my own answers.. . and that is how I'm here today."
Soujiro stopped. He was out of breath and both mentally and emotionally exhausted by recalling all of his life's earlier events. They were not pleasant for him. Even amidst the oppressive feelings, his heart felt a little lighter if that was possible. He felt better because he had told her the truth. It had been nagging at him the past couple of days because he felt guilty for not being around her. Now that she knew, he decided it would be best to say their good-byes. There is no way that she would allow someone as stained as I am to be in her presence. But no matter what I'll make sure those people don't get to her, even if that means I have to protect her in the shadows. He was afraid to look up at her. He knew that once he did, he would have to leave. Soujiro felt an incredible ache in his heart at the thought of leaving the young woman that he had grown to like so much within that short period of time they had spent together.
Kaoru looked at the man with much compassion and sadness. Her sapphire eyes were brimming with tears and her cheeks were already damp. One tear found its way down the curvature of her cheek and silently fell onto Soujiro's hand.
The wetness of his hand shook Soujiro from his thoughts and he instantly looked up at Kaoru. He was surprised to see, not fear, hate or disgust, but . . but compassion, sadness, and understanding in her eyes. She would shed her tears for me?, he thought in disbelief.
In that moment after he looked up, Kaoru embraced him.
"I'm so . . so .. sorry Sou-chan. I wish you didn't have to face so much pain in the past. I wish that I could've been there for you. ." Her tears came down even more as she spoke those words.
"You . . you don't hate me?", he asked stupidly. She feels bad for me instead? I don't think I'm hearing this right.
"Sou-chan, I told you that I didn't care about your past . .and I meant it. To me you're not the assassin, but a dear friend who has been by my side these few days. You, who have shared in my laughter, anger, confusion, and sadness. If it weren't for you, I don't know what would have happened to me," Kaoru said with much tenderness and sincerity in her voice.
Soujiro sat stunned. Am I hearing this correctly? I told her about my past, yet she still accepts me for who I am? I'm still her friend? Am I dreaming? Is she just naïve? She broke the embrace and looked into his eyes that were still wide with disbelief at what she had just said.
She smiled tenderly at him and said, "Sou-chan, you're my friend." Soujiro looked at the girl with a new sense of awe and admiration. "I know I've said this before, but I realize that the past is what made you 'you'. . . and . . and I'm grateful to have such a great friend like you. I only wish . . I wish that I could've helped you back then." She stopped and looked over at the young boy.
Both figures sat in comfortable silence at the moment as they replayed the scene in their heads and looked out the window. They didn't notice how dark it had gotten outside since Soujiro had started his story. Kaoru stood up and extended her hand to help him up. He gratefully took it with a smile.
"Sou-chan, it's getting a bit cold in here. Why don't you go gather some firewood while I cook dinner," Kaoru asked with a smile.
"Okay, Kaoru-san" the boy replied timidly. He was still a little shocked with the entire encounter that he just shared with the girl. Kaoru walked into the kitchen to begin to prepare dinner. As he started to walk out the door he stopped and paused. He turned around and with his hand he scratched the back of his head nervously. "Ano .. Kaoru-san?"
"Yes, Sou-chan?" she said, pausing in the chopping of the vegetables as she turned to him.
"Can I call you Kao-chan?"
Kaoru started to giggle as she saw his mood starting to lighten from earlier. "Of course, Sou-chan!"
His smile brightened and turned back around to open door. "Be back later, Kao-chan!"
"Okay," she replied. She turned back to her cooking. Now, what should I make?, she thought as she looked at what was before her. Hmm .. I'll make one cup of rice .. so that means one cup of water? Eh .. and some miso soup I guess.
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Soujiro returned home and the warmth of the house welcomed him in from the harsh coldness of the night air.
"Tadaima," Soujiro said aloud.
"Okaeri nasai. Dinner is ready," Kaoru replied cheerfully.
Soujiro set down his things as he made his way over to the kitchen to help. After they got the food, they both sat down next the to the table.
"Itadakimasu!" Kaoru said enthusiastically.
Soujiro started with the rice. He spooned some up with his chopsticks and took a large bite. He was extremely hungry. He looked over at the girl and smiled. She's like a dream come true, he thought as he bit into the rice. This rice is very goo - - , eh?
CRUNCHHe paused in his chewing. Was he imagining things or was this rice . . crunchy? He bit down once again.
CRUNCH
No, he wasn't imagining it. In order to risk breaking his teeth, he swallowed what was left in his mouth. He looked back up at the girl. She had been watching him the entire time to see what he would say about her cooking. He gave her a weak smile.
Maybe the miso soup is better, he thought as he picked up the bowl. He took a big sip because he wanted to wash down what was left of the rice. His eyes grew wide as his taste buds registered the taste of the soup. In order to avoid spitting everything back up, he held his breath and swallowed.
He looked back up at her. She was still smiling cheerfully, awaiting for what he would say about her food.
He smiled.
"You do consider me a friend, ne Kao-chan?" Soujiro asked.
"Of course, Sou-chan," Kaoru replied brightly.
"So . . you're not trying to poison me right?"
"Eh?" Kaoru was dumbfounded. Soujiro was still smiling at her. (A/N: His eyes are closed .. like in the anime series when he gives that mask-like smile.) She looked down at the food and looked back up at him. His expression hadn't changed. Kaoru's eye began to twitch as she started to process what he was trying to say.
Soujiro, uncomfortable with the long silence, started to squint open his eyes little by little. Sitting across from him, was a very, very red and very, very upset Kaoru. He should have just kept his eyes closed.
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- To be continued
Author's Notes:
Please read and review.
Another chapter to build up the relationship between Kaoru and Soujiro =D Hehe . . I just thought that it would be good if Soujiro told her about his past so that way there would be absolute trust between the two of them. Also, I will repeat for the LAST TIME à THIS IS A K/K FIC. .
Hmm. . and as I've said before .. I know Soujiro and Kaoru have been becoming really close with one another. That's just what I want right now . . things will become clearer as the story progresses onwards ^_^
Thanks to my reviewers:
Nicky, ^_^, AnimeFreako, wolfpack, Uenki, somebody, Princess of Darkness, Tsugoi Kakarlena, kenshinfan, kato, Souryusen, chibi, Briar, shippo, beriath, chibi frog, Luna Angel, hoots, kaoru-no-tanuki, Ana, CurlsofSerenity, pushpitake, Inugirl, tigerrelly, Califpinay3001, animelub, ranma sao, saotome, kiki, kim, john, Poohbear, Jouchano8, anime lover, Clemen, Miya-chan, Narutaka Masami, Kyoznekozukigirl, nihongo55, Aino Saori, wudnt u like 2 kno, kuru kuru 17, Stripe, Syaoran's blossom, Sarahi, Hiei 7, lostanimeangel, thunder sister, Baby Kaorusama, Ayuka, Moonwind, Inuyasha chic515, CTCandInu65, Ryuugirl, Volleygurly, and Sanosuke Sagara for your support!
Thanks for all the comments =D They're all too flattering *blushes .. hehe ^_^