Chapter 2
Connor and Lorne came thru the Hotel doors at 6:30 p.m. with their arms loaded with food.
"Sorry Wesley, Connor was hungry and I hadn't eaten yet either so I stopped at the Green Burrito. I have some burrito's , tacos, enchiladas, rice and refried beans. Man do those guys know how to cook. You can't find food this good in Pylea." Lorne explained as they put everything on the counter.
Gunn and Fred came to the counter also. They had been playing a Nintendo game and Fred was winning.
"Hey thanks Lorne. I was getting so hungry I was about ready to start begging Fred to feed her man before he does something drastic. But here you are coming to the rescue."
"Your welcome, it's always nice to know I'm loved for something besides reading peoples destiny." Lorne said as he grabbed a couple of cokes for Connor and himself.
Cordelia and Angel had come downstairs a few minutes after Lorne came in and Cordelia grabbed a taco and enchilada for herself.
"Thank you Lorne, I don't care what Gunn says about you your okay in my book."
Cordelia went to the small side kitchen where they did most of their cooking and poured some pigs blood into a glass mug and put it into the microwave just long enough to get the chill off of it. When it signaled it was done she opened the microwave door and pulled the mug out then grabbed a Pepsi for herself and went back to the lobby. Everyone was standing around the counter eating their food.
"When I was in Pylea all I could think of when I was hungry, which was most of the time, was tacos. Tacos, tacos, tacos. I dreamt of them night and day."
At that time Dr. Martin came down the stairs. Angel had heard her opening and closing her bedroom door. Cordelia had just brought him his mug of warmed blood and looked at him over her taco. She noticed that he was looking towards the staircase. She looked at the stairs also and saw Dr. Martin coming down. She was wearing a long, full, black skirt and a long sleeved white cotton blouse. Her hair was pulled up in a bun at the back of her head. As she approached them she noticed that the Doctor didn't have any makeup on except for a light lipstick. Cordelia also noticed how she held her skirt up from the back instead of the front like most women did as they went down stairs.
Wesley picked up his paper napkin and wiped his mouth and hands then went over to Dr. Martin.
"Good evening Dr. Martin. Did you have a nice rest?"
"Yes I did. Thank you for asking."
"Before I introduce you to everyone I need to see you in my office for a few minutes." Wesley directed her to his office and turned to Lorne.
"Lorne would you come in my office please?"
Lorne looked at his burrito that he was about to eat and reluctantly put it back down and joined Wesley in his office.
"Dr. Martin this is Lorne. Lorne owns a bar called Carritas and frequently helps us here at Angel Investigations. As you can see Lorne isn't from our world. I've asked him to join us because he can read you and by that I mean he can tell if a person is telling the truth and your future. In order for him to do this though you have to sing for him."
Wesley then proceeded to tell Lorne who Dr. Martin was and what she was here for.
"Good evening Dr. Martin. You can start anytime you want."
Dr. Martin proceeded to sing Amazing Grace. At first Lorne seemed frightened then he was smiling. Lorne approached her and gently took her hand, raised it to his lips and kissed her hand. He then put his head close to hers and whispered in her ear.
"Your secret is safe with me Dr. Martin."
She looked at him and smiled. "Thank you Lorne you are a true gentleman."
"Lorne, what did you see?" Wesley asked as he watched this secret exchange.
"You can trust her 100% Wesley. We will all be safe in her capable and lovely hands."
It took Wesley a moment to recover from what just happened, but he had never seen Lorne react in such a way. He shook his head and said "I don't know what you saw Lorne but your readings haven't failed us yet. Let's join the rest."
He started to open the door when Dr. Martin stopped him by putting her hand on his arm.
"May I have a moment please. Lorne and Wesley I am going to ask for a certain seating arrangement each time the group meets and I assure you I have good reasons for this. Wesley I take it that Connor and Gunn are the strongest men after Angel that is, is that correct?"
"Yes, that's true." Wesley answered. He was curious as to why she was asking this.
"Lorne I need you to stand behind Angel at all times and tell me when you see a major change in his aura." Lorne nodded his understanding.
Wesley opened the door and waved the Doctor through.
Angel, Cordelia, Fred and Connor where all waiting by the lobby counter and where talking about the mysterious guest. At least she was a mystery to th em because they still didn't know anything about her except her name. The group broke up when they heard Wesley's office door open. Without saying anything Wesley proceeded to put the chairs in the order that Dr. Martin had on the paper she had given him. When he was done he turned to everyone and before anyone could say anything he told them where to sit.
"Before we start with the introductions would you all please sit down in the positions that I point out to you. Ladies would you sit on the round center couch please." Pointing at three chairs that were close together, "Connor sit here, Angel sit in the middle and Gunn in the last chair. I'll sit over here and Lorne can sit or stand wherever he chooses."
Wesley had given Angel a sofa chair and Connor and Gunn each had office chairs that had been taken from Angels office and his own. He gave himself and Dr. Martin sofa chairs and put small tables next to the chairs so they could put papers or drinks on them. The rest had the coffee table in front of them. Everyone took their appointed seats without question and of course Lorne stood behind the counter as Dr. Martin had asked.
Dr. Martin stood in the middle of everyone and started with explaining who she was. She gave her background except for the fact that she was a Sister but she did say where she worked in case anyone called for her. All the time she was walking back and forth and talking Angel was watching her carefully. He was deep in thought when he realized she was standing in front of him.
"Angel."
It took a few seconds, but when she was sure she had his full attention she began with the explanation of why she was here. She sat down on the coffee table in front of him.
"I am here to help you and not the other way around. I was sent by the Boss of what you call "The Powers that Be". She stopped for a moment to let it sink in and watched Angel for any reaction. He gave absolutely none except to rub his chin.
Gunn was looking at everyone else, waiting for someone to ask the question.
"Who is the PTB's boss?"
Everyone but Angel looked at Gunn. Dr. Martin was still watching Angel.
"God" Angel said as though it was a well known fact. Cordelia looked at Lorne knowing he could tell if anyone was lying. He saw her looking at him and he nodded yes to her silent question of whether Dr. Martin was telling the truth or not.
Dr. Martin sat down at her chair and proceeded to tell them about Sr. Margaret's visitor and all of his instructions. She left some parts out but told them when she was doing so. She wanted to be as truthful as possible with these people. She continued to explain that St. Michael had brought it to Gods attention as to how the PTB were handling things. St. Michael was instructed to correct it.
"Angel, you seem to be a million miles away. May I ask what your thinking?"
"I am thinking this visit is for a lot more then letting us know that the PTB's behavior isn't up to the basic expectations." Angel replied.
"Your right, this is about much more then what I have mentioned so far." She paused for a minute.
"It's about your redemption."
When she said that it was so quiet you could hear a pin drop.
"Angel is going to need everyone's help to get through the next 2 months. In the past you have all looked to Angel for his leadership and his special abilities. For the next 2 months though he is going to be as weak and as lost as a newborn baby. "
"Why, what's going to happen to him?" Cordelia asked.
"It's not about what is going to happen to him. It's what Angelus is going to hear that makes me think he is going to make Angel walk a few leagues through hell. Angelus isn't going to like it and he is going to want Angel to get as far from me as he can."
" I directed all of you to sit in specific positions because of your own special abilities or as in Cordelia's case, her relationship with Angel." She had been walking back and forth in front of them until now. She stopped in front of Angel but spoke to Conner and Gunn.
"Do you know why I asked you two to sit on either side of him during these sessions?" Connor and Gunn looked at each other and just shrugged.
"No." Gunn said.
Dr. Martin backed away and returned to her seat. She looked at everyone in the room.
"Each of you will have an important part to play in Angel's redemption. That is why each of you is here. Over the past several years you have all come together to create a close knit family of friends. You help each other when the going gets tough. Does everyone understand why Angel has the abilities that he has. By abilities I mean his strength, the ability to see in the dark, his heightened sense of smell and so forth?"
"He's a Vampire." Cordelia said.
"Can you elaborate on that further Wesley?" Dr. Martin asked him.
"When a person is bitten by a Vampire and sires them by making them drink their blood the victim dies. At least that is what is basically known by everyone. What actually happens though is the victims soul leaves their body and a demon is called by the Vampires blood to take over the victims body. The demon is the one that has the superhuman strength, his heightened sense of smell, his superhuman ability to hear over great distances and his ability to see in the dark all come from the demon. In Angels case his demon perverted the name that his sister called him and took the name of Angelus. What was unusual for Angel was that the Gypsy curse called his soul back so that Angel and the demon Angelus resided in the same body. In doing this Angel would remember everything that Angelus did and has to constantly fight for control of his own body."
At that time Dr. Martin took over again and directed herself to Connor and Gunn again.
"Do you understand now why you both are on either side of him."
"Yes, we are the strongest and we will have a better chance of controlling him if Angelus should win control."
"Yes, that is exactly why. But do you understand why he might run?" Although she was talking to Gunn and Connor she was looking at Lorne. Lorne gave a sign that he thought Angel was going to leave any second.
Dr. Martin got up and knelt down in front of Angel and put both of her hands on his.
"You must understand Angel that you are going to have to be stronger then you've ever had to be before." Everyone was now looking at Angel. Sweat was pouring down the side of his face which was an important sign because Angel was normally cold to the touch. This told her why Lorne thought he could run at anytime. He was engaged in a mighty battle inside, and how Angel spent eternity depended on his winning the war. It was expected that he would lose a few battles but he had to win the war.
Angels eyes were closed as he put all of his mind into keeping control. After a few minutes he opened them again and looked at her. He looked down at his hands and saw that his hands were bleeding. He had balled his hands into a fist so tightly that his nails had punctured his skin. He saw that both of Dr. Martin's hands were on his. Angel looked into her eyes and just said "thank you."
"Would you take Angel and wash the blood from his hands. I don't think he can do that for himself right now." Cordelia got up and said she would take care of him.
"No Cordelia, I need to talk to the rest of you right now. Fred would you take care of Angel please? And take him to the big kitchen."
Fred got up and went to Angel. He seemed to be in a daze so she took his arm and guided him to the big kitchen where she could clean his hands. She knew Dr. Martin wanted her to go to the big kitchen so that Angel wouldn't hear what they were saying.
"I want to explain myself to all of you in that I will frequently ask everyone if you understand something. It's not that I think your ignorant or uneducated but when something happens people perceive it in different ways. I want to make sure that you perceive it in the same way that I do and unless I ask you I don't know if we are driving on the same road. Now let me start out with what just happened with Angel. What do you think of it. "
Gunn looked at Wesley and Cordelia. Since they didn't say anything he spoke up.
"We all look up to Angel so much that it's scary seeing him like that. I guess we all kind of see him as indestructible. It's like when you see your old man get hurt or die. You don't really think of them as human like you are. Angel always just gets over it like nothing happened. But this, this is different."
"I believe their was a time not to long ago when Angel fired everyone and he was going through some hard times trying to deal with Darla. If you think about it you'll understand why he did it. He didn't want you to see him like he is now. It's like I said before, Angel is going to need all of your support and understanding. Right now though he is in a battle with Angelus instead of Darla. It's important that Angel wins these battles and eventually the war. "
"How do we know Angel won?" Gunn asked.
Dr. Martin pointed to Lorne.
"That's why Lorne is where he is. He would let us know. When I saw Angel reacting as he was I looked at Lorne and he gave me the signal to let me know he thought Angel might run. Which would mean that Angelus was in control. That's why I came over to Angel and put my hands on him. You saw how he was better able to control himself and somehow I gave him the strength to win this battle with Angelus. The human touch can be very powerful."
As she leaned back in her chair she saw Angel and Fred coming back. Angel had a small towel rapped around each hand that had soaked up the blood. Dr. Martin knew that Angel healed fast so she wasn't concerned. She looked at her watch and asked if anyone would like to take a 15 to 20 minute break or if they would like to stop for the night and continue tomorrow at 10 am. Everyone wanted to continue tonight.
They each got up to take a bathroom break since they had been at it since 7pm and it was now 9pm. When Cordelia came back she saw Angel still sitting in his chair. As far as she knew he never had to relieve himself. Like everything else about Angel the way his body functioned was a mystery also.
"I think Angel should have some of that nice warm blood you always make for him." Dr. Martin said to Cordelia.
"Would you like some Angel? I can add a little zing to it by adding some hot sauce."
"That sounds good Cordy. Thank you."
Dr. Martin followed her into the small kitchen. She grabbed a burrito with some rice and beans and warmed them up in the microwave while watching Cordelia prepare the pigs blood. She asked if they had bottled water. After Cordelia gave her the water she put the mug of blood in the microwave for 10 seconds and took it out and stirred it then put it back in for another 10 seconds. When she took it out of the microwave to put some hot sauce in it to give it some flavor Dr. Martin put her hand on Cordelia's arm.
"Wait a second Cordelia, let me put something in it to make him sleep tonight. Tomorrow morning I am going to give you instructions on how I want you to start preparing his blood."
When Cordelia looked at her with a worried look on her face Dr. Martin quickly added "these are the instruction given to me and I am told they came directly from St. Michael himself."
After hearing that Cordelia was visibly more relaxed. By the time Dr. Martin was finished with her quick meal Cordelia was finished warming Angels mug of blood up to 98 degrees. It always took a long time to warm the blood up because it had to be done slowly and stirred often so that it wouldn't cook.
They both returned to the group but before they got there she whispered to Cordelia to make sure Angel drank all of it.
"Don't worry about that he knows what will happen if he doesn't. In some ways he's more afraid of me then he is of Angelus." she laughed and just gave the mug to Angel along with a kiss on his forehead. He smiled at her and thanked her. He was in full control now and felt cold to the touch which was a good sign that they could continue.
Everyone else was already sitting. Connor had opened a can of Pepsi, Gunn had a Root Beer and the rest had either tea or bottled water.
Dr. Martin began once again. "Starting tonight Los Angeles will be quiet for the next two months. This is a promise from St. Michael, but remember the operative word here is quiet not dead."
Gunn had a big smile on his face. "Vacation."
"I don't think you'll be thinking that after two months." Dr. Martin said to Gunn.
"Connor did you know that you have your own chapter in the Watchers Chronicles and it's from reading these reports that I have learned a great deal about you and how you came into existence."
"I thought Wesley was an ex-Watcher. Who is writing this stuff?" Connor started to get agitated. This was the first time Connor spoke and he showed how fast his inherited Irish temper quickly came to the surface.
"I am submitting reports to the council each month." Wesley said. "Each time I submit a report I am paid $100 and it helps to supplement my income. Angel of course knows all about this."
Connors temper started to flare as he stood up and Dr. Martin moved to diffuse it.
"Connor" she called to him but he was still looking at Wesley. Both Wesley and Angel had stood up, ready for trouble from him.
"Connor, please.....sit down." This time Connor sat down and cooled down.
"Why were you so angry Connor?"
"I didn't like the fact that Wesley was reporting to someone about me when I didn't know about it."
"Connor, you were a baby at the time. To tell you the truth I did tell you about it but you didn't understand what I was saying so I talked to your father about it."
Connor was quiet for a minute then he started laughing at what Wesley said.
"Im sorry Wesley. All I can say is it's my fathers fault."
"How is it my fault?" Angel asked.
"You're the one that gave me this fiery Irish temper." They all had a good laugh at that because it was so true. If Angel made mistakes it was when he let his temper get the better of him.
"I know that you were raised in the Catholic Church Angel but did you have Connor baptized?"
"Yes we did. About 15 days after he was born Cordelia took him to church and he was baptized with Fred and Gunn as his Godparents. That was the first time I ever regretted not being able to go into a church for mass."
Dr. Martin stood up and once again started pacing back and forth.
"Tell me, and I'm opening this to everyone, why do you think Vampires are so afraid of the Catholic Church?"
Gunn was raising his hand like a little kid in school.
"Because if they touch anything it will burn them."
"Yes that's true but why does it burn them?" Dr. Martin was trying to get them to think more deeply into the reason. No one answered. So she turned to Angel and asked him another question.
"When Angelus was in control did he ever kill a religious person and by that I mean someone dressed as a religious person and were you could identify them as such?"
"I can't say with 100% certainty but I would say no."
"Why?" she asked.
"Like Gunn said I would get burned."
"Once again. Why?"
"It's because of the battle between good and evil. It's the goods sword or way of protecting all that belongs to God."
Dr. Martin then turned to Wesley.
"How would you define it Wesley?"
"I agree with Angel it's Gods way of protecting them."
Dr. Martin returned to her chair and looked at Angel.
"Angel do you believe you are evil?"
Everyone was quiet while patiently waiting for Angels answer. Angel bent forward and was rubbing his right thumb into his left hand. He was obviously rubbing it very hard because you could see the skin on the back of his hand moving back and forth.
"Yes, I am." He finally answered.
"Why do you think that your evil?" She asked in a low voice because she didn't want to break the moment. She also noticed that his left hand was starting to bleed. He was literally tearing his hand where he had previously dug his own nails in his hands. When she saw the blood dropping to the floor she realized that Angel had worked himself into a trance like state. Dr. Martin carefully stood up and quietly walked over to Angel and sat on the coffee table in front of him. He continued to look down at his hands and rubbing his left palm. The blood continued to flow but more freely now. She was afraid she would break his trance if she touched him.
"Angel why do you think you are evil?" she asked once again.
"I've killed hundreds of people. I've tortured people before I drained them of their blood. I tortured Drusilla's family in front of her until she lost her mind and then I turned her. I killed Jenny and didn't even bother to take her blood. I was already full from two previous killings."
There was now a widening pool of blood on the floor.
Dr. Martin turned and looked at Cordelia and signaled for her to come over quietly. As Cordelia stood up and started for Angel the Doctor held her hand up to make her stop.
"Angel". She wanted to see if he would stop and look at her. A few seconds passed and he looked at her but continued to rub his hand. She lightly put her hand on his arm.
"Angel you are not evil. Angelus is the one that did those terrible things. Do you understand. That was Angelus and not Angel. Angelus is the demon that makes your body do those things, not Angel the Vampire with a soul."
Angel looked at her, searching her eyes for something that would tell him that this was the truth and not just what he was longing to hear. Within the next minute he stopped rubbing his hand and began to shake. He lowered his head and started to cry uncontrollably. Dr. Martin let Cordelia go to him. Cordelia wrapped her arms around him and just let him cry.
Everyone had been watching Angel. Gunn had gone to Fred when he saw that she was crying to. Wesley and Lorne just lowered there heads and if you looked closely you could see tears falling down there faces. Connor was staring at Angel, his father. He had never seen him like this. None of them had. Angel was always the strongest, emotionally as well as physically. It was a shock to see him so vulnerable.
Dr. Martin looked at every ones reaction to what had happened. She realized now how much they all loved this man.
The drug and herbs that she had put into his drink had now started to take over. Angel started to fall asleep in Cordelia's arms. She got up and placed him back against the chair. She turned to Gunn and Connor and asked them both to help her take Angel to his bed. They each grabbed one of his arms and carried him to the elevator and then to his room. Cordelia went in front of them and turned a light on in his room and pulled the covers down. She told them to take Angels clothes off and place him in the bed. Cordelia went to get the first aid kit to take care of his hand. By the time she got back they had him in bed with the covers tucked under his arms. Cordelia looked at his hand. The bleeding had stopped. She placed a towel under his hand and poured hydrogen peroxide in it while forcing his hand to form a cup so that the peroxide would have time to work. She wrapped his hand then and put everything away. She came back to him and kissed him on the forehead and turned the lights out. Before going downstairs she took a minute to go into the bathroom and get her own crying under control.
Cordelia walked back down the stairs. Without saying a word she walked over to Dr. Martin and just stood in front of her. Lorne had started towards Cordelia as soon as he saw her standing in front of the Doctor. Her aura was red hot. He had also called out to Wesley at the same time hoping that he could get to her before she did anything. But it was too late. Lorne called out to her.
"Cordelia no."
Cordelia look at the Doctor for a moment then slapped her as hard as she could. She had put so much force behind it that the poor Doctor had fallen side ways onto Gunn and Fred and knocked them down as well.
Wesley grabbed both of her arms and pulled them back so that she couldn't try it a second time. They could all see that she was so furious that she couldn't respond to them. Gunn helped Fred and Dr. Martin up.
"Are you alright Dr. Martin?" Fred said as she pulled her hair back so she could check the doctors face. Cordelia had left an imprint of her hand on her face that was probably going to turn black and blue.
"Why did you let that happen? You saw how he was tearing his hand up. Why did you do nothing to stop him? Hasn't he suffered enough?" Cordelia was crying as she yelled at Dr. Martin. Wesley let go of her arms so he could turn her around and hugged her. Cordelia just continued to cry and after a few minutes was able to get control of herself again.
"Cordelia, Dr. Martin would never purposely hurt Angel or let him hurt himself to the point of irreparable damage. You know how fast he heals. Angel was doing that to himself in order to keep himself from leaving. Couldn't you see that he was going into a trance like state so that he could stay. You've seen how hard it is on him when Angelus exerts pressure on him. The more he rubbed his hand the better able he was able to control Angelus. Now then Cordelia I think you owe Dr. Martin an apology."
Cordelia looked like a little girl who had just been reprimanded for doing something wrong. She approached Dr. Martin.
"I'm sorry Dr. Martin. Please forgive me. I shouldn't have done that."
"All is forgiven Cordelia. I'm telling you now though that this won't be the last time that you'll want to do that." Dr. Martin turned to the rest as well.
"This is only the beginning and I know that it will get worse before I am able to accomplish my mission. The more Angelus hears the more he will fight Angel for control of his body. I knew this was coming and I wanted Angel to get a good nights sleep. That's why I drugged him. If I don't drug him to induce a deep sleep then Angelus would keep him awake all night trying to get him to run or else make him believe that it was all his fault and that I'm lying."
"Wait a minute are you telling us that Angelus may come back if Angel loses control or the battle as you call it?" Gunn asked.
"No, but he will get him to run. That is why I have you and Connor sitting on either side of him to stop him." Dr. Martin put her hands on Cordelia's arms and made her look at her.
"Cordelia you must understand that Angel must go through this in order for him to continue in his role of Champion. St. Michael the Archangel, who is God's champion is Angels guardian angel. He took over as his guardian angel when the Gypsies cursed him and brought his soul back. He could see how sometimes Angel loses control and Angelus makes him do and say things that he wants."
"When did that happen?" Cordelia asked.
"Remember when he fired everyone and Darla started to exert her influence on him and they eventually had sex. That happened because Angels mind was to weary from constantly fighting Angelus, his demon, and he finally gave in to what Angelus wanted. For awhile Angels mind could rest. He didn't have to fight Angelus or Darla's torturing him in his dreams anymore. Remember how he would look so tired all of the time before he fired all of you? That was because his mind was always working. It never got to rest. Our bodies are rested after only a few hours. Our minds are what needs at least six hours of complete rest. During that time Angels mind wasn't even getting an hour of rest before Darla and Angelus would start influencing his dreams. Normally we dream for a short time after we fall asleep and before we wake. But Angels dreams continued all through the time he was sleeping. He finally gave in because he was tired. I don't intend for that to happen again. I gave him the drugs so that he would get the rest he needs and also when he is in a deep sleep Angelus can't talk to him because his brain is essentially shut down.
"How do you know such minute detail of what happened?" Wesley asked.
"Remember what I said earlier when I first was explaining what I'm doing here. I received all of my information from Sr. Margaret and she was told and shown everything that happened by St. Michael the Archangel who is also Angels guardian angel."
It was now 12 midnight and everyone looked pretty tired. Dr. Martin was still on Eastern Standard Time and so for her it was actually 3 am in the morning.
"Why don't we call it a day and get a good nights sleep." As everyone said good night and started to go upstairs Dr. Martin called out to Cordelia.
"Cordelia, could you wait a minute please?" Cordelia came back and sat down and Dr. Martin sat on the coffee table.
"I want you to do something for me tonight. Tonight I want you to go and sleep next to Angel. I know that you and Angel are in love."
"Dr. Martin we can't ever make love because of the Gypsy curse." Cordelia said as she started to cry. After what happened this evening her emotions were constantly at the surface.
"Cordelia all I want you to do is lie down beside him. If you think that you two can't control yourselves then sleep with your clothes on and on top of the sheets. But if you think you can control the situation then take everything off and lie beside him. I want you to remind him of what he is fighting for. Because if we are successful then you and Angel will have your night of perfect happiness without Angelus ever taking over again."
"How can you be sure? What if we think he's okay and we try having sex and Angelus comes back. How can we be 100% sure." Cordelia was practically yelling at the Doctor while crying all of the time.
"Cordelia listen to me." Dr. Martin waited a few minutes until she could get control of herself. She gave her some kleenex that she had in her pocket. She waited for her to wipe her eyes and blow her nose.
"Now do you think you can listen to me calmly?"
"Yes, I think so. I'm sorry." She said as she wiped her face again.
"Do you believe me when I say that the PTB's boss has sent me to help all of you?"
Cordelia was hesitant but then answered. "Yes I believe you now. I didn't at first but I believe you now."
"Then I am asking you to believe me when I say that I have been told that you and Angel will be given this gift if he makes all of the right decisions and that is why I want him to see you as the light at the end of the tunnel. Because in order to get to the end of that tunnel he is going to suffer a lot more. Always keep in mind that Angelus will be constantly talking to him, telling him that he is evil and reminding him of each and every person that he has killed and how he killed each of them. When Angelus sees that we are winning he will probably bring out the big guns so to speak. Do you know what that will be Cordelia?" Cordelias head was down and she had her hands covering her face.
"Yes I do. It will be the fact that Kathy, his little sister, was the second person he killed and that he killed Jenny and almost killed Buffy."
"Yes, that is what I think also. Before that happens though we have to convince Angel and make him understand that Angel, the man, had died and his soul was not in him when the demon Angelus killed and tortured all those people. The only thing that Angel is guilty of is living the life he did before he became a Vampire and after he was cursed with his soul again. I believe though Cordelia that the coming days will be almost as hard on you as they are on Angel. Do you think you can be strong enough to withstand the coming days?"
Cordelia wiped her face again, pushed her hair behind her ears again and took a deep breath.
"Yes I believe I can. I love Angel and I would go to hell and back for him. Thank you for talking to me about this Dr. Martin."
They both got up and Cordelia hugged her and then turned to go up to Angels bedroom. She quietly turned the door knob to Angels bedroom and went in. She was being as careful as she could because the old door knobs in the Hyperion tended to squeek a lot when they were handled. She turned and looked to see if Angel was still asleep. That was hard to tell since he didn't breath. What Cordelia was really doing was trying to decide what she would do. She asked herself, did she have it in her to control Angel and herself from going to far. Could she give him at least a few moments of happiness without letting Angelus take control. She had been standing at the window with the drapes wide open, thinking. She thought to herself, yes I've done it several times before. She closed the drapes being careful that no light could possibly get in. She went to the other side of the be and carefully removed all of her clothes and put them over the back of the chair that was in the corner. She wanted to take a shower first because she was hurting all over. She didn't realize that almost all evening her muscles had been kept tight while she went through all of the emotions that were being squeezed out of her. She hadn't felt this sore since a couple of months ago when she had been laid up with the flu for a whole week.
After 2 weeks Angel had come knocking at her door at 6 am. When she pretended not to hear him he quietly slipped inside. She knew he had come in because she had peeked at him with one eye. She closed her eye again when he turned back to her and came to the bed. He just stood over her watching her breathing. He knew she was awake because he could hear her heart beating faster then if she was sleeping. Cordelia knew what he had in mind for her today because he had his sweat pants on and a sleeveless t-shirt. Cordelia continued to pretend she was sleeping by turning on her back and pretended to snore a little. Before she knew it Angel had started to tickle her mercilessly. She was laughing so hard she almost couldn't catch her breath. All the time she was saying "stop, stop I'll get up." But Angel didn't stop fast enough so she pulled him down on top of her. She had meant to pull him to the side and then push him onto the floor. But the position he was in felt so right that she put her arms around his neck and pulled his head down into a kiss. She loved the gentle way that he started to kiss her and how he let it progress slowly. She thought no wonder he told his father that he wouldn't have to worry about where he was going to sleep at night. He probably had them taking a number. This time though he had stopped them from going to far. He spanked her behind with a loud slap which drew a loud "OWE, what did you do that for?" Cordelia said as she rubbed her bottom.
"That's for trying to get out of your training with me today." He got up and pulled the covers off of her completely. Lucky for him she had been wearing pajamas instead of just her birthday suit like she sometimes did when it was hot. It was now Fall and the nights were cooling down.
When they got down to the basement they found Gunn already there working out with the punching bag. By the time Angel finally let her stop exercising she was so exhausted she could barely make it up the stairs and into the shower. She remembered just standing there like she was now, letting the hot water run over her sore muscles.
When she had come out of the bathroom rubbing her hair with one of Angels large white bath sheet towels she could see that he was still in a deep sleep. He was still in the exact same position as when she came in. Cordelia finished drying her hair and ran a comb through it. She turned the light off and went back out into the bedroom, walked to the bed and removed the towel she had wrapped around her. She lifted the covers and slipped in beside Angel. She didn't feel the coldness of his body because she was still warm from the hot shower. As soon as her head hit the pillow she fell asleep.
TBC....................