Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Anime Craze! I don't own any anime or Whose Line. I only own Christopher Julius (my character) and Gamerctm (me).
Voice: Good evening and welcome to "Whose Line is it Anyway!, Halloween Style!" On tonight's show, {cut to C.J., who's wearing a vampire costume.} I vant to suck your blood. Christopher Julius! {cut to Yolei (from Digimon.), who's wearing a witch's costume.} I get you and your little dog. Yolei! {cut to a hooded person in a black cloak.} {Gamer speaks a fake chant.} {person lifts off the hood exposing he's Hiei.} Hiei! And. {cut to Kenshin who's wearing a mad scientist costume.} It's alive! ALIVE! Kenshin! {cut to Gamer, who's in the audience and wearing a werewolf costume.} And I'm your host, Gamer! Lets have a spooky time! {walks to his desk.} Welcome to Whose Line is it Anyway. The show where everything's made up and the points don't matter.
Yolei: That's a pretty realistic costume. Your face is so hairy.
Gamer: About that, I haven't shaved in two days. {audience laughs.} But enough about that, lets go to our first game, Hollywood Director! This is for everyone. {the performers walk on stage.} C.J., Yolei, and Kenshin are going to act out a scene. Hiei, the director will interrupt and tell them to act it out with a different style that are on these cards. {hands Hiei the cards.} The scene is. {looks at his card.} Dr. Frankenstein, who is Kenshin, and his monster, who is C.J., is bringing to life the monster's bride, who is Yolei. And Hiei is the director, whenever you're ready.go!
{Yolei is standing still with her eyes closed. Kenshin is looking at her.}
Kenshin: {looks at C.J.} Can't you run any faster, monster? If that generator doesn't run, we'll never bring her to life!
C.J.: {starts running in place.} {monster like voice.} Shouldn't we wait for a thunderstorm? That might be easier.
Kenshin: I thought you were wanted her right now.
C.J.: Got a point there. {starts running faster.} Must.bring.bride.to.life.Got.to.talk.this.way. {audience laughs.}
{Yolei twitches around like she's being electrocuted. After a few seconds she stops and opens her eyes.}
Kenshin: {looks at her.} She alive! ALIVE!!!
{C.J. looks at her. Yolei looks at him.}
Yolei: {screams when she sees C.J.} AHH!!! {looks at Kenshin.} AHH!!! {looks at her hands.} AHH!!!
Kenshin: Apparently the lady is sugar-high! {audience laughs.} {Hiei walks on stage.}
Hiei: {annoyed} Cut! Cut! Cut! {looks at C.J.} I don't want to say your performance was pathetic. it wasn't good enough to be that! {audience laughs.} {mimicking C.J.} Must.talk.like. What were you thinking?
C.J.: I thought.
Hiei: Shut up! You weren't thinking! {audience laughs. Looks at all 3 of them.} We need to do this another way. {pulls out a card.} Do it like a fast-paced game show! {audience laughs.} Make my 400+ fan girls happy. Action! {walks off stage.}
Kenshin: {to C.J.} Welcome to "Get a Life!" You are just one question. Don't stop running! {C.J. starts running in place quickly.} One question from your prize! Are you ready?
C.J.: Yeah!
Kenshin: You sure?
C.J.: Yeah!
Kenshin: You sure?
C.J.: Yeah!
Kenshin: You sure? {audience laughs.}
C.J.: {shouting.} Read me the question!!!
Kenshin: Alright! The question is. {quickly.} "What is the correct answer to this question?
C.J.: BUZZ! {quickly.} The correct answer to that question is the correct answer to that question! {audience roars with laughter.}
Kenshin: BLING! BLING! BLING! {quickly.} That is correct! The correct answer to that question is the correct answer to that question. YOU WIN!!! {audience cheers.} Tell im' what he's won!
Yolei: {quickly.} You won sweet and beautiful me! I will be your bride, 'til death do us part! As long as you die first! {audience laughs.} I will scream and claw at you all the time, but you'll get used to it!
C.J.: {walks up to Yolei.} This is the happiest day of my life!
Yolei: {looks at C.J.} AHH!!! {Audience laughs and cheers. Hiei comes back on stage.}
Hiei: Cut! Cut! Cut!
Yolei: How did I do?
Hiei: You were great.
Kenshin: How did I do?
Hiei: You were great, too.
C.J.:: How 'bout me?
Hiei: Shut up! {audience laughs.} That wasn't the best way. We need. {looks at a card.} Something for the kids. Do it.like munchkins! {audience roars with laughter.} Action! {walks off stage. The performers get on there knees.}
Kenshin: {high pitched munchkin voice.} We must bring her to life! {audience laughs.}
C.J.: {starts running on his knees. The audience laughs and cheer.} {munchkin voice.} Follow the yellow-brick road! Follow the yellow-brick road!
Kenshin: {munchkin voice.} We must sing her awake! {signing in the voice.} Ohhhhh. Ding-dong! She'll come to life! {audience laughs.}
C.J.: {same voice.} Who'll come to life?
Kenshin: {same voice.} She'll come to life! {Yolei opens her eyes and looks at C.J.}
Yolei: {screams in a high pitched voice.} AHH!!!
Kenshin: CRACK! {acts like he's taking off a pair of glasses.} Hmm. {audience laughs. Hiei walks on stage.}
Hiei: Cut! Cut! Cut!
C.J.:{munchkin voice.} Well? {gets up.} {normal voice.} Sorry. I was still in munchkin mode.
Hiei: You sounded better that way, Now, we need something else. We need. {looks at a card.} comedy! Do it like insult comics! {audience laughs.} Look! {points to the audience.} They're already laughing! Action! {walks off stage.}
Kenshin: {to C.J.} You're slower than yo' mama!!! {audience laughs.}
C.J.: {Dennis Leary's voice.} She just stitched up dead body parts?! I'm not sleepin' {points to Yolei} with that!!! {audience roars with laughter.}
Yolei: {screams at C.J.} You're uglier now than you was when you were IN PIECES!!! {audience laughs.}
C.J.: YO' MAMA!!!
Kenshin: Yeah! YO' MAMA!!! {Hiei walks on stage.}
Hiei: Cut! Cut! {BUZZ} {BUZZ} {BUZZ} {the audience cheer as the performers go to their seats.}
Gamer: That was great! Well, usually we give out points, but since this is Halloween, I'm giving out. {Hiei crosses his fingers. Gamer pulls out a pillowcase.} CANDY!
Hiei: Yes! {audience cheers.}
Gamer: {sticks his hand in the bag and throws a handful of candy at the performers. They all catch some.} Enjoy!
Hiei: {eating a Snickers candy bar.} I think I like this show.
{Yolei is eating a Smarties and Kenshin is eating some M&Ms.}
C.J.: {he pours a whole box of lemon-heads in his mouth.} Damn! {his face scrunches up from the sour taste.}
Gamer: You guys ready for the next game?
C.J.: {puckered up from the taste.} Yeah. {audience laughs.}
Gamer: {laughs.} Lets go to our next game, Duet! This is for C.J. and Hiei! {audience cheers as they come on stage. C.J. puts a stage in the middle.} You guys are gonna sing a song in a special style to a person from the audience. But we already chose the person. Come on out!
{a teenage girl appears on the stool.}
C.J.: {after seeing the girl.} Whoa! Where'd you come from?!
Gamer: Guys. This is Miyu, The Vampire Princess. {audience cheers as Hiei and C.J. shake hands with her.} You've probably seen her show so you'll sing to her using her name and her show in the style of. {reads his card.} Rock! {audience cheers.} So when the music starts, go! {loud rock music starts playing. Hiei and C.J. act like they're playing guitars.}
C.J.: YEAH! {singing.} There is a vampire princess, her name is Miyu! If you're a shinma, {points to the audience.} she'll hunt after you!
Hiei: {singing.} She doesn't fly or float, or turn into mist. She's not a regular vampire, but she's the best on the list!
C.J.: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! {the audience, Miyu and the performers applaud and cheer.}
Hiei: {starts doing riffs on his "guitar".} Vampire Princess!
C.J.: {singing.} Miyuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu! When you walk in the night, never fear. Shinma will be stopped by her, you bet! But if her eyes are gold, you better cover your neck! {audience cheers and Miyu laughs.}
Hiei: Cover your neck! {singing.} She can turn invisible. That the best of luck! When it comes to blood, she thinks that it sucks! {audience and Miyu laugh.}
C.J.: Don't try to stop her with a cross!
Hiei: Not a cross!
C.J.: Holy Water won't work!
Hiei: Never the water!
C.J.: She don't turn to stone in daylight!
Hiei: Daylight! Not a stone!
C.J.: And garlic. it stinks! {holds his nose.}
Hiei: Garlic stinks! She's the vampire that'll always last! Dracula? She can kick his ass! {audience laughs.}
C.J.: Vampire!!! Princess!!!
Hiei and C.J.: MIYU!!! {music stops. The audience and Miyu applaud.} {BUZZ}
{Miyu gets up and shakes hands with Hiei and C.J.}
Gamer: {pulls out the bag.} Take whatever you want Miyu! {Miyu puts her hand in the bag and takes some candy. She then walks to a seat in the front row.} You too, guys! {Hiei and C.J. run up and takes two hands full of candy each and walk back to their seats.} Well, while you guys eat your candy, I'd like to give a special Happy Birthday shout-out to my little sister, Jennifer, who just turned 13 this week. {audience cheers and applauds.} Just think, I use to aggravate her when she was a child. Now I can aggravate her as a teen! {audience laugh.} {looks at Hiei and C.J. There are candy wrappers all over the floor.}
Hiei: Lets go to the next game. I want more candy!
Gamer: Don't worry about the mess. Union guys are screaming "Don't touch it!!!" Lets move to our next game, Questions Only! {audience cheers as the performers come on the stage.} The object of this game is our performers have to act out a scene speaking only in questions. Since its Halloween, we gave the scene a Halloween style. The scene is, going into a haunted house. So whenever your ready, take it away. {C.J. walks to the right off stage. Hiei, the left. Yolei and Kenshin are on stage.}
Yolei: Did you hear that?
Kenshin: Hear what?
Yolei: You didn't hear it?
Kenshin: Do I need to?
Yolei: Wasn't that the howl of 300 pound, 6 foot, ugly, hairy bat with 8 eyes, bad breath, a horrible screech and was flying over our heads at about 70 miles per hour. {audience starts to laugh and cheer.} seeking its prey near the swamp adjacent to the graveyard about 3 miles south of this old abandon house owned by the ghost of a hideous vampire? {audience cheer and applaud.}
Kenshin: {pause} Could you repeat that? {audience laughs.}
Yolei: I.no. {BUZZ} {walks off stage as the audience laugh a little. C.J. walks on stage.}
Kenshin: You own this house?
C.J.: Who's asking?
Kenshin: Didn't you see my mouth move?
C.J.: You some sorta wise guy?
Kenshin: Do you own the house?
C.J.: Don't you know I'm just a plumber?
Kenshin: Who lives here, then?
C.J.: Can't you read? It says plumber! {runs his finger across the top corner of his shirt.}
Kenshin: You don't know who lives here?
C.J.: {runs his finger across the corner again.} Didn't I say I'm just a plumber? {audience laughs.}
{Kenshin pauses. He walks off stage.} {BUZZ} {audience laugh and applaud. Hiei walks on stage.}
Hiei: Who owns this place? {audience laughs.}
C.J.: For the last time! I'm just a. Dammit!!! {BUZZ} {audience laughs as he walks off stage. Yolei takes his place.}
Yolei: Where'd the plumber go? {audience laugh and cheer.}
Hiei: Do you know who I am?
Yolei: {gasp} Are you the ghost?
Hiei: {raises his hood.} {spooky voice.} Why don't you leave now?
Yolei: Why should I?
Hiei: Don't you know this house is haunted?
Yolei: By who?
Hiei: {pause} {lowers his hood.} I don't know. {BUZZ} {walks off stage. Kenshin takes his place.}
Kenshin: Do you seek the ghost?
Yolei: Do I?
Kenshin: Do you now where to look?
Yolei: Should I check the bathroom?
Kenshin: Would you believe the ghost has a very weak bladder? {audience laughs.}
Yolei: {pause.} I should go. {walks off stage.} {BUZZ} {C.J. takes her place.}
Kenshin: Are YOU the vampire?
C.J.: Am I?
Kenshin: {points at his shirt.} Doesn't it say "Vampire" on the corner of your shirt? {audience laughs.}
C.J.: {looks at the corner.} You know what? I does! {BUZZ} {BUZZ} {BUZZ} {audience cheers as the performers return to their seats.}
Gamer: We'll have more Whose Line is it Anyway right after this!
}}commercial break{{
{cut to the stage. The audience is applauding. C.J. is in his seat, holding in his left hand a toy caged skeleton.}
Gamer: Welcome back to "Whose Line is it Anyway!" The show where everything's made up and the points don't matter.}
Toy: {C.J. waves his hand in front of it.} {spooky voice.} Happy Halloween!
Gamer: You like that?
C.J.: Sure do!
Toy: {C.J. waves his hand in front of it, again.} Treat or Treat! Give me lots of candy!
Gamer: Do it one more time.
Toy:{C.J. waves his hand in front of it, one more time. Bad to the Bone starts playing.} On the day that I was born! Nurses all gathered 'round!
C.J.: {singing along.} Gazed at the wide wonder! Of the joy that they found! {audience cheers.} Head nurse spoke up! Said leave this one alone! She could tell right away! That I was bad to the bone!
Gamer: Alright, let's move onto, Hey You Down There! This is for C.J., Hiei, and Kenshin. {they come to the stage.} C.J. and Hiei are gonna to act out a 50s information film scene, and Kenshin will be off stage as the voice over narrator, prompting them to do something. Since this is Halloween, you two will be doing a How to Treat or Treat information film. So whenever you're ready, go! {peppy music starts playing.}
Kenshin: {off-screen.} Hey you down there! {Hiei and C.J. look around for the voice.} Up here!!! {Hiei and C.J. look up and act shocked.} No, I'm not God. {audience laughs. C.J. and Hiei goes on there knees and bow up and down to the voice.} Hey! Get up! {they get up.} I'm just a dis-figured mysterious voice. {C.J. and Hiei nod their heads.} I'm gonna teach you how to Trick or Treat! Looks like you already got your costumes. {Hiei and C.J. look at their outfits.} So know we're ready to practice Trick or Treating. C.J., act like you're holding a bowl of candy. {C.J. does that.} Hiei. How do you get candy from him? {Hiei looks at C.J. and raises his index finger and thumb and points it to C.J. like a gun. C.J. quickly raises his arms.} That's not right! C.J., show him how to get candy. Hiei, hold the bowl. {Hiei does as told. C.J. fakes punches Hiei in the eye and takes the "bowl" and runs. The audience laughs.} No! That not way! If you want candy, just say, "Trick or Treat!" Got it? {Hiei and C.J. nod their heads.} Alright, go out the door. You're ready for candy. {they walk around the stage.} There's a house! It has candy! {C.J. and Hiei face the audience.} Remember what to do? {They nod their heads.} Okay! Knock on the door. {C.J. pretends to knock on a door.} Someone's answering. They open the door and. shut it in your face! {C.J. and Hiei's smiles fade.} Looks like they don't have any candy. What are you going to do now? {C.J. and Hiei point their fingers toward the audience a out like they're shouting by moving their mouths. The audience laughs.} No! Don't shout obscenities to the house. {Hiei is stomping the ground.} Don't crush the pumpkins! {C.J. reaches for the fly of his pants.} HEY!!! HEY!!! HEY!!! {C.J. stops and the audience goes wild with laughter. Gamer is also laughing hysterically.} C.J., You don't {laughs.} You don't relieve yourself on the front door. {audience laughs and applauds.} You go to the next house! {Hiei and C.J. walk around for a while.} Another house. {they face the audience again, C.J. knocks on the door.} Someone is coming! {Hiei and C.J. are smiling.} It's a lady with a huge plastic candy bowl! She put something in your bags! {C.J. and Hiei look at their "bags."} She gave you. apples! {C.J. and Hiei's smiles fade.} Looks like no candy. What do you do now? {Hiei walks to the back of the stage and comes back. He's pretending to hold a small bag.} What's in the bag? {C.J. takes the "bag" and pretends to light it with a lighter. He sets down in front of the door. The audience laughs.} Was that a flaming bag of doggy doo-doo? {C.J. and Hiei run around.} Ohh, you two. That wasn't nice. {Hiei and C.J. pretend to laugh. They look to the right.} That's a empty house. There no can. {Hiei and C.J. walk to the right.} What are you doing? {C.J. pretends to pick up a rock. He throws it to the right.} You smashed the window! {Hiei and C.J. crawl into the "window"} Where are you going? {they come out like they're both carrying a heavy object.} Put that TV back! {audience laughs. Hiei and C.J. run away.} {BUZZ} {BUZZ} BUZZ}
Gamer: {as the performers return to their seats.} {laughing.} That was great! Give them a hand for that one! {the audience applauds.} {still laughing.} Oh my God. that was so funny! Hey this house don't have any candy, lets take the TV! {audience laughs.} Oh man. I liked when you were about to pee on the door. That was funny.
C.J.: That's the way I used to do it. If the house was empty, you tell the other kids by takin' a whiz on the front door. {audience laughs.}
Gamer: {reaches into the bag of candy and throw two handfuls at the performers.} You deserve this guys! {the performers grab some candy.} Let go to a game called, Sound Effects! {audience cheers.} This is for Yolei and Kenshin. {goes into the audience as the performers come on stage. Gamer goes to the top row.} {to the people in the seats.} You are?
Oak: Professor Samuel Oak.
Gamer: {to the person next to him.} And you are?
Delila: Delila Ketchum.
Gamer: Congratulations! You've been chosen for our next game! {audience applauds and Oak and Delila follow Gamer to the stage.} Kenshin, this is Professor Oak.
Kenshin: How's it going? {shakes hands with Oak.}
Gamer: Yolei, this is Delila Ketchum.
Yolei: How do you do? {shakes hands with Delila.}
Gamer: Now the way this game works, Kenshin and Yolei are going to act out a scene. Professor Oak and Delila will, when prompted to, provide the sound effects. Oak will do the sound effects for Kenshin and Delila for Yolei. {walks to his desk and reads a card.} The scene is, Kenshin and Yolei are Trick or Treaters who get lost in the woods. And Oak and Delila will provide the sound effects. Go!
Kenshin: Hand me a egg, real quick. I wanna nail that house! {audience laughs.}
Yolei: {pretends to hand Kenshin a egg.} Here you go.
Kenshin: {to the house.} Give me a apple, will you? {throws the egg.}
Oak: Crack!
Kenshin: Apparently, I didn't throw it hard enough! {looks on the ground. The audience laughs.}
Yolei: Watch me! {throws a egg. Nothing happens.} I missed. Lets go somewhere else.
Delila: Crack!
Kenshin: There it is! {audience laughs.}
Yolei: That house was farther than I thought!
Kenshin: Anything from that house? {points to the back.}
Yolei: No candy.
Kenshin: Excuse me. {reaches for his zipper. The audience laugh.} Uh! It seems to be stuck!
Oak: Ziiiip!
Kenshin: Be right back. {turns around, facing his back to the audience. They laugh and cheer hysterically. Oak and Delila are laughing, too. He turns around.} Nothing! Guess I didn't have to go.
Yolei: You know. The way you were laughing back there, you'd think you were doing something else. {audience and Gamer laughs.} If you know what I mean.
Kenshin: Is that a forest? {points to the right.}
Yolei: If we go through it, we'll end up at. {pause.} Well, lets go! {they walk around until they stop in the middle of the stage.} That sounds like a owl.
Delila: Hoo.hoo.hoo.
Yolei: And a the wind is blowing.
Delila: {slight blowing.}
Yolei: Is that a leprechaun?! {audience laughs.}
Delila: I'm a leprechaun! A leprechaun! {audience laughs.}
Yolei: He wants us to know what he is!
Kenshin: Listen! It sound like a.
Oak: Grrrrrrrrrr.
Kenshin: It's a vacuum cleaner! {audience laughs.}
Yolei: We better run! {they start running in place.}
Oak and Delila: .pant.uh. hah..hah.
Yolei: Stop! {they all stop.} Listen to that sound! Is that a werewolf?
Delila: Grrrrrr. reow.
Kenshin: It's far away!
Oak and Delila: GRRRRRRRR. GROWL.
Kenshin: {shouting.} THERE'S A WHOLE PACK OF THEM! {audience laughs.} THEY'RE CLOSE!!!
Delila: Snarl!
Yolei: We're surrounded! What can we do?
Kenshin: Wait a minute! Werewolves can only walk around on a full-moon, right?
Yolei: Yes!
Kenshin: I'll blow up the moon!!! {audience laugh.} That God I'm wearing my DBZ outfit! {looks at the ceiling. He holds out his hand.} I'll charge up!
Oak: {slowly} Woooooooooooo.
Yolei: That'll take forever! I better help. {looks at the ceiling and holds out her hand.}
Delila: Shoo...shoo.shoo.shoo.shoo. {audience laughs.}
Kenshin: On the count of three, fire your energy! 1-2-3!
Oak and Delila: KA-BOOOM!!!
Yolei: Someone destroyed the moon before us. {BUZZ} {audience laughs and cheers.}
Gamer: We'll be right back with more Whose Line and find out who the winner is. Don't go away!
}commercial break{{
{scene fades in. The audience is applauding. C.J., Gamer, Hiei, and Kenshin are standing on the stage in a row.}
Gamer: Welcome back to Whose Line! Tonight's winner. Yolei! {Yolei is at the desk applauding.} An the rest of us has to do a game called, Irish Drinking Song! {the audience cheer.} We are going to make up a Irish drinking song, singing one line at a time. And what are we singing about, Yolei?
Yolei: The Halloween party Irish drinking song!
Gamer: The Halloween party Irish drinking song! Let's go! {piano music starts playing.}
All: Ohhhh. Ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-di!
C.J.: I went to Halloween party!
Gamer: I was happy as can be!
Hiei: It was the best there was!
Kenshin: I got drunk you see!
C.J.: I filled up on candy!
Gamer: I filled up on beer!
Hiei: I got hit by a car!
Kenshin: I went as a deer! {audience laughs.}
All: Oh. Ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-di!
Gamer: The music was a-loud!
Hiei: I went on the dance floor!
Kenshin: Everyone laughed at me!
C.J.: I peed on the front door! {audience laugh and cheer.}
Gamer: {laughing.} Boy, how embarrassing!
Hiei: I didn't care!
Kenshin: I just wanted to have fun!
C.J.: I leaked like a bear! {audience laughs.}
All: Oh. Ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-di!
Hiei: It got darker outside!
Kenshin: I was pretty scared!
C.J.: We went out the house!
Gamer: Tempers started to flare!
Hiei: People wanted to stay inside!
Kenshin: People wanted out!
C.J.: I got hit in the face!
Gamer: A leprechaun knocked me out! {audience laughs.}
All: Oh. Ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-di!
Kenshin: Now for the costume contest!
C.J.: I was gonna win!
Gamer: No one's costume was like mine!
Hiei: It was made of tin!
Kenshin: I won first place!
C.J.: I don't mean to sound rude!
Gamer: My suit was the best!
Hiei: I went as a nude! {audience laugh and cheer.}
All: Oh. Ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-di! Oh. Ide-ide-ide-ide {ending.} Di-de-di- de-DIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!! {music stops and the audience cheers.}
Gamer: That's all for "Whose Line is it Anyway!" Happy Halloween!!!
{scene fades out.}
Anime Craze! I don't own any anime or Whose Line. I only own Christopher Julius (my character) and Gamerctm (me).
Voice: Good evening and welcome to "Whose Line is it Anyway!, Halloween Style!" On tonight's show, {cut to C.J., who's wearing a vampire costume.} I vant to suck your blood. Christopher Julius! {cut to Yolei (from Digimon.), who's wearing a witch's costume.} I get you and your little dog. Yolei! {cut to a hooded person in a black cloak.} {Gamer speaks a fake chant.} {person lifts off the hood exposing he's Hiei.} Hiei! And. {cut to Kenshin who's wearing a mad scientist costume.} It's alive! ALIVE! Kenshin! {cut to Gamer, who's in the audience and wearing a werewolf costume.} And I'm your host, Gamer! Lets have a spooky time! {walks to his desk.} Welcome to Whose Line is it Anyway. The show where everything's made up and the points don't matter.
Yolei: That's a pretty realistic costume. Your face is so hairy.
Gamer: About that, I haven't shaved in two days. {audience laughs.} But enough about that, lets go to our first game, Hollywood Director! This is for everyone. {the performers walk on stage.} C.J., Yolei, and Kenshin are going to act out a scene. Hiei, the director will interrupt and tell them to act it out with a different style that are on these cards. {hands Hiei the cards.} The scene is. {looks at his card.} Dr. Frankenstein, who is Kenshin, and his monster, who is C.J., is bringing to life the monster's bride, who is Yolei. And Hiei is the director, whenever you're ready.go!
{Yolei is standing still with her eyes closed. Kenshin is looking at her.}
Kenshin: {looks at C.J.} Can't you run any faster, monster? If that generator doesn't run, we'll never bring her to life!
C.J.: {starts running in place.} {monster like voice.} Shouldn't we wait for a thunderstorm? That might be easier.
Kenshin: I thought you were wanted her right now.
C.J.: Got a point there. {starts running faster.} Must.bring.bride.to.life.Got.to.talk.this.way. {audience laughs.}
{Yolei twitches around like she's being electrocuted. After a few seconds she stops and opens her eyes.}
Kenshin: {looks at her.} She alive! ALIVE!!!
{C.J. looks at her. Yolei looks at him.}
Yolei: {screams when she sees C.J.} AHH!!! {looks at Kenshin.} AHH!!! {looks at her hands.} AHH!!!
Kenshin: Apparently the lady is sugar-high! {audience laughs.} {Hiei walks on stage.}
Hiei: {annoyed} Cut! Cut! Cut! {looks at C.J.} I don't want to say your performance was pathetic. it wasn't good enough to be that! {audience laughs.} {mimicking C.J.} Must.talk.like. What were you thinking?
C.J.: I thought.
Hiei: Shut up! You weren't thinking! {audience laughs. Looks at all 3 of them.} We need to do this another way. {pulls out a card.} Do it like a fast-paced game show! {audience laughs.} Make my 400+ fan girls happy. Action! {walks off stage.}
Kenshin: {to C.J.} Welcome to "Get a Life!" You are just one question. Don't stop running! {C.J. starts running in place quickly.} One question from your prize! Are you ready?
C.J.: Yeah!
Kenshin: You sure?
C.J.: Yeah!
Kenshin: You sure?
C.J.: Yeah!
Kenshin: You sure? {audience laughs.}
C.J.: {shouting.} Read me the question!!!
Kenshin: Alright! The question is. {quickly.} "What is the correct answer to this question?
C.J.: BUZZ! {quickly.} The correct answer to that question is the correct answer to that question! {audience roars with laughter.}
Kenshin: BLING! BLING! BLING! {quickly.} That is correct! The correct answer to that question is the correct answer to that question. YOU WIN!!! {audience cheers.} Tell im' what he's won!
Yolei: {quickly.} You won sweet and beautiful me! I will be your bride, 'til death do us part! As long as you die first! {audience laughs.} I will scream and claw at you all the time, but you'll get used to it!
C.J.: {walks up to Yolei.} This is the happiest day of my life!
Yolei: {looks at C.J.} AHH!!! {Audience laughs and cheers. Hiei comes back on stage.}
Hiei: Cut! Cut! Cut!
Yolei: How did I do?
Hiei: You were great.
Kenshin: How did I do?
Hiei: You were great, too.
C.J.:: How 'bout me?
Hiei: Shut up! {audience laughs.} That wasn't the best way. We need. {looks at a card.} Something for the kids. Do it.like munchkins! {audience roars with laughter.} Action! {walks off stage. The performers get on there knees.}
Kenshin: {high pitched munchkin voice.} We must bring her to life! {audience laughs.}
C.J.: {starts running on his knees. The audience laughs and cheer.} {munchkin voice.} Follow the yellow-brick road! Follow the yellow-brick road!
Kenshin: {munchkin voice.} We must sing her awake! {signing in the voice.} Ohhhhh. Ding-dong! She'll come to life! {audience laughs.}
C.J.: {same voice.} Who'll come to life?
Kenshin: {same voice.} She'll come to life! {Yolei opens her eyes and looks at C.J.}
Yolei: {screams in a high pitched voice.} AHH!!!
Kenshin: CRACK! {acts like he's taking off a pair of glasses.} Hmm. {audience laughs. Hiei walks on stage.}
Hiei: Cut! Cut! Cut!
C.J.:{munchkin voice.} Well? {gets up.} {normal voice.} Sorry. I was still in munchkin mode.
Hiei: You sounded better that way, Now, we need something else. We need. {looks at a card.} comedy! Do it like insult comics! {audience laughs.} Look! {points to the audience.} They're already laughing! Action! {walks off stage.}
Kenshin: {to C.J.} You're slower than yo' mama!!! {audience laughs.}
C.J.: {Dennis Leary's voice.} She just stitched up dead body parts?! I'm not sleepin' {points to Yolei} with that!!! {audience roars with laughter.}
Yolei: {screams at C.J.} You're uglier now than you was when you were IN PIECES!!! {audience laughs.}
C.J.: YO' MAMA!!!
Kenshin: Yeah! YO' MAMA!!! {Hiei walks on stage.}
Hiei: Cut! Cut! {BUZZ} {BUZZ} {BUZZ} {the audience cheer as the performers go to their seats.}
Gamer: That was great! Well, usually we give out points, but since this is Halloween, I'm giving out. {Hiei crosses his fingers. Gamer pulls out a pillowcase.} CANDY!
Hiei: Yes! {audience cheers.}
Gamer: {sticks his hand in the bag and throws a handful of candy at the performers. They all catch some.} Enjoy!
Hiei: {eating a Snickers candy bar.} I think I like this show.
{Yolei is eating a Smarties and Kenshin is eating some M&Ms.}
C.J.: {he pours a whole box of lemon-heads in his mouth.} Damn! {his face scrunches up from the sour taste.}
Gamer: You guys ready for the next game?
C.J.: {puckered up from the taste.} Yeah. {audience laughs.}
Gamer: {laughs.} Lets go to our next game, Duet! This is for C.J. and Hiei! {audience cheers as they come on stage. C.J. puts a stage in the middle.} You guys are gonna sing a song in a special style to a person from the audience. But we already chose the person. Come on out!
{a teenage girl appears on the stool.}
C.J.: {after seeing the girl.} Whoa! Where'd you come from?!
Gamer: Guys. This is Miyu, The Vampire Princess. {audience cheers as Hiei and C.J. shake hands with her.} You've probably seen her show so you'll sing to her using her name and her show in the style of. {reads his card.} Rock! {audience cheers.} So when the music starts, go! {loud rock music starts playing. Hiei and C.J. act like they're playing guitars.}
C.J.: YEAH! {singing.} There is a vampire princess, her name is Miyu! If you're a shinma, {points to the audience.} she'll hunt after you!
Hiei: {singing.} She doesn't fly or float, or turn into mist. She's not a regular vampire, but she's the best on the list!
C.J.: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! {the audience, Miyu and the performers applaud and cheer.}
Hiei: {starts doing riffs on his "guitar".} Vampire Princess!
C.J.: {singing.} Miyuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu! When you walk in the night, never fear. Shinma will be stopped by her, you bet! But if her eyes are gold, you better cover your neck! {audience cheers and Miyu laughs.}
Hiei: Cover your neck! {singing.} She can turn invisible. That the best of luck! When it comes to blood, she thinks that it sucks! {audience and Miyu laugh.}
C.J.: Don't try to stop her with a cross!
Hiei: Not a cross!
C.J.: Holy Water won't work!
Hiei: Never the water!
C.J.: She don't turn to stone in daylight!
Hiei: Daylight! Not a stone!
C.J.: And garlic. it stinks! {holds his nose.}
Hiei: Garlic stinks! She's the vampire that'll always last! Dracula? She can kick his ass! {audience laughs.}
C.J.: Vampire!!! Princess!!!
Hiei and C.J.: MIYU!!! {music stops. The audience and Miyu applaud.} {BUZZ}
{Miyu gets up and shakes hands with Hiei and C.J.}
Gamer: {pulls out the bag.} Take whatever you want Miyu! {Miyu puts her hand in the bag and takes some candy. She then walks to a seat in the front row.} You too, guys! {Hiei and C.J. run up and takes two hands full of candy each and walk back to their seats.} Well, while you guys eat your candy, I'd like to give a special Happy Birthday shout-out to my little sister, Jennifer, who just turned 13 this week. {audience cheers and applauds.} Just think, I use to aggravate her when she was a child. Now I can aggravate her as a teen! {audience laugh.} {looks at Hiei and C.J. There are candy wrappers all over the floor.}
Hiei: Lets go to the next game. I want more candy!
Gamer: Don't worry about the mess. Union guys are screaming "Don't touch it!!!" Lets move to our next game, Questions Only! {audience cheers as the performers come on the stage.} The object of this game is our performers have to act out a scene speaking only in questions. Since its Halloween, we gave the scene a Halloween style. The scene is, going into a haunted house. So whenever your ready, take it away. {C.J. walks to the right off stage. Hiei, the left. Yolei and Kenshin are on stage.}
Yolei: Did you hear that?
Kenshin: Hear what?
Yolei: You didn't hear it?
Kenshin: Do I need to?
Yolei: Wasn't that the howl of 300 pound, 6 foot, ugly, hairy bat with 8 eyes, bad breath, a horrible screech and was flying over our heads at about 70 miles per hour. {audience starts to laugh and cheer.} seeking its prey near the swamp adjacent to the graveyard about 3 miles south of this old abandon house owned by the ghost of a hideous vampire? {audience cheer and applaud.}
Kenshin: {pause} Could you repeat that? {audience laughs.}
Yolei: I.no. {BUZZ} {walks off stage as the audience laugh a little. C.J. walks on stage.}
Kenshin: You own this house?
C.J.: Who's asking?
Kenshin: Didn't you see my mouth move?
C.J.: You some sorta wise guy?
Kenshin: Do you own the house?
C.J.: Don't you know I'm just a plumber?
Kenshin: Who lives here, then?
C.J.: Can't you read? It says plumber! {runs his finger across the top corner of his shirt.}
Kenshin: You don't know who lives here?
C.J.: {runs his finger across the corner again.} Didn't I say I'm just a plumber? {audience laughs.}
{Kenshin pauses. He walks off stage.} {BUZZ} {audience laugh and applaud. Hiei walks on stage.}
Hiei: Who owns this place? {audience laughs.}
C.J.: For the last time! I'm just a. Dammit!!! {BUZZ} {audience laughs as he walks off stage. Yolei takes his place.}
Yolei: Where'd the plumber go? {audience laugh and cheer.}
Hiei: Do you know who I am?
Yolei: {gasp} Are you the ghost?
Hiei: {raises his hood.} {spooky voice.} Why don't you leave now?
Yolei: Why should I?
Hiei: Don't you know this house is haunted?
Yolei: By who?
Hiei: {pause} {lowers his hood.} I don't know. {BUZZ} {walks off stage. Kenshin takes his place.}
Kenshin: Do you seek the ghost?
Yolei: Do I?
Kenshin: Do you now where to look?
Yolei: Should I check the bathroom?
Kenshin: Would you believe the ghost has a very weak bladder? {audience laughs.}
Yolei: {pause.} I should go. {walks off stage.} {BUZZ} {C.J. takes her place.}
Kenshin: Are YOU the vampire?
C.J.: Am I?
Kenshin: {points at his shirt.} Doesn't it say "Vampire" on the corner of your shirt? {audience laughs.}
C.J.: {looks at the corner.} You know what? I does! {BUZZ} {BUZZ} {BUZZ} {audience cheers as the performers return to their seats.}
Gamer: We'll have more Whose Line is it Anyway right after this!
}}commercial break{{
{cut to the stage. The audience is applauding. C.J. is in his seat, holding in his left hand a toy caged skeleton.}
Gamer: Welcome back to "Whose Line is it Anyway!" The show where everything's made up and the points don't matter.}
Toy: {C.J. waves his hand in front of it.} {spooky voice.} Happy Halloween!
Gamer: You like that?
C.J.: Sure do!
Toy: {C.J. waves his hand in front of it, again.} Treat or Treat! Give me lots of candy!
Gamer: Do it one more time.
Toy:{C.J. waves his hand in front of it, one more time. Bad to the Bone starts playing.} On the day that I was born! Nurses all gathered 'round!
C.J.: {singing along.} Gazed at the wide wonder! Of the joy that they found! {audience cheers.} Head nurse spoke up! Said leave this one alone! She could tell right away! That I was bad to the bone!
Gamer: Alright, let's move onto, Hey You Down There! This is for C.J., Hiei, and Kenshin. {they come to the stage.} C.J. and Hiei are gonna to act out a 50s information film scene, and Kenshin will be off stage as the voice over narrator, prompting them to do something. Since this is Halloween, you two will be doing a How to Treat or Treat information film. So whenever you're ready, go! {peppy music starts playing.}
Kenshin: {off-screen.} Hey you down there! {Hiei and C.J. look around for the voice.} Up here!!! {Hiei and C.J. look up and act shocked.} No, I'm not God. {audience laughs. C.J. and Hiei goes on there knees and bow up and down to the voice.} Hey! Get up! {they get up.} I'm just a dis-figured mysterious voice. {C.J. and Hiei nod their heads.} I'm gonna teach you how to Trick or Treat! Looks like you already got your costumes. {Hiei and C.J. look at their outfits.} So know we're ready to practice Trick or Treating. C.J., act like you're holding a bowl of candy. {C.J. does that.} Hiei. How do you get candy from him? {Hiei looks at C.J. and raises his index finger and thumb and points it to C.J. like a gun. C.J. quickly raises his arms.} That's not right! C.J., show him how to get candy. Hiei, hold the bowl. {Hiei does as told. C.J. fakes punches Hiei in the eye and takes the "bowl" and runs. The audience laughs.} No! That not way! If you want candy, just say, "Trick or Treat!" Got it? {Hiei and C.J. nod their heads.} Alright, go out the door. You're ready for candy. {they walk around the stage.} There's a house! It has candy! {C.J. and Hiei face the audience.} Remember what to do? {They nod their heads.} Okay! Knock on the door. {C.J. pretends to knock on a door.} Someone's answering. They open the door and. shut it in your face! {C.J. and Hiei's smiles fade.} Looks like they don't have any candy. What are you going to do now? {C.J. and Hiei point their fingers toward the audience a out like they're shouting by moving their mouths. The audience laughs.} No! Don't shout obscenities to the house. {Hiei is stomping the ground.} Don't crush the pumpkins! {C.J. reaches for the fly of his pants.} HEY!!! HEY!!! HEY!!! {C.J. stops and the audience goes wild with laughter. Gamer is also laughing hysterically.} C.J., You don't {laughs.} You don't relieve yourself on the front door. {audience laughs and applauds.} You go to the next house! {Hiei and C.J. walk around for a while.} Another house. {they face the audience again, C.J. knocks on the door.} Someone is coming! {Hiei and C.J. are smiling.} It's a lady with a huge plastic candy bowl! She put something in your bags! {C.J. and Hiei look at their "bags."} She gave you. apples! {C.J. and Hiei's smiles fade.} Looks like no candy. What do you do now? {Hiei walks to the back of the stage and comes back. He's pretending to hold a small bag.} What's in the bag? {C.J. takes the "bag" and pretends to light it with a lighter. He sets down in front of the door. The audience laughs.} Was that a flaming bag of doggy doo-doo? {C.J. and Hiei run around.} Ohh, you two. That wasn't nice. {Hiei and C.J. pretend to laugh. They look to the right.} That's a empty house. There no can. {Hiei and C.J. walk to the right.} What are you doing? {C.J. pretends to pick up a rock. He throws it to the right.} You smashed the window! {Hiei and C.J. crawl into the "window"} Where are you going? {they come out like they're both carrying a heavy object.} Put that TV back! {audience laughs. Hiei and C.J. run away.} {BUZZ} {BUZZ} BUZZ}
Gamer: {as the performers return to their seats.} {laughing.} That was great! Give them a hand for that one! {the audience applauds.} {still laughing.} Oh my God. that was so funny! Hey this house don't have any candy, lets take the TV! {audience laughs.} Oh man. I liked when you were about to pee on the door. That was funny.
C.J.: That's the way I used to do it. If the house was empty, you tell the other kids by takin' a whiz on the front door. {audience laughs.}
Gamer: {reaches into the bag of candy and throw two handfuls at the performers.} You deserve this guys! {the performers grab some candy.} Let go to a game called, Sound Effects! {audience cheers.} This is for Yolei and Kenshin. {goes into the audience as the performers come on stage. Gamer goes to the top row.} {to the people in the seats.} You are?
Oak: Professor Samuel Oak.
Gamer: {to the person next to him.} And you are?
Delila: Delila Ketchum.
Gamer: Congratulations! You've been chosen for our next game! {audience applauds and Oak and Delila follow Gamer to the stage.} Kenshin, this is Professor Oak.
Kenshin: How's it going? {shakes hands with Oak.}
Gamer: Yolei, this is Delila Ketchum.
Yolei: How do you do? {shakes hands with Delila.}
Gamer: Now the way this game works, Kenshin and Yolei are going to act out a scene. Professor Oak and Delila will, when prompted to, provide the sound effects. Oak will do the sound effects for Kenshin and Delila for Yolei. {walks to his desk and reads a card.} The scene is, Kenshin and Yolei are Trick or Treaters who get lost in the woods. And Oak and Delila will provide the sound effects. Go!
Kenshin: Hand me a egg, real quick. I wanna nail that house! {audience laughs.}
Yolei: {pretends to hand Kenshin a egg.} Here you go.
Kenshin: {to the house.} Give me a apple, will you? {throws the egg.}
Oak: Crack!
Kenshin: Apparently, I didn't throw it hard enough! {looks on the ground. The audience laughs.}
Yolei: Watch me! {throws a egg. Nothing happens.} I missed. Lets go somewhere else.
Delila: Crack!
Kenshin: There it is! {audience laughs.}
Yolei: That house was farther than I thought!
Kenshin: Anything from that house? {points to the back.}
Yolei: No candy.
Kenshin: Excuse me. {reaches for his zipper. The audience laugh.} Uh! It seems to be stuck!
Oak: Ziiiip!
Kenshin: Be right back. {turns around, facing his back to the audience. They laugh and cheer hysterically. Oak and Delila are laughing, too. He turns around.} Nothing! Guess I didn't have to go.
Yolei: You know. The way you were laughing back there, you'd think you were doing something else. {audience and Gamer laughs.} If you know what I mean.
Kenshin: Is that a forest? {points to the right.}
Yolei: If we go through it, we'll end up at. {pause.} Well, lets go! {they walk around until they stop in the middle of the stage.} That sounds like a owl.
Delila: Hoo.hoo.hoo.
Yolei: And a the wind is blowing.
Delila: {slight blowing.}
Yolei: Is that a leprechaun?! {audience laughs.}
Delila: I'm a leprechaun! A leprechaun! {audience laughs.}
Yolei: He wants us to know what he is!
Kenshin: Listen! It sound like a.
Oak: Grrrrrrrrrr.
Kenshin: It's a vacuum cleaner! {audience laughs.}
Yolei: We better run! {they start running in place.}
Oak and Delila: .pant.uh. hah..hah.
Yolei: Stop! {they all stop.} Listen to that sound! Is that a werewolf?
Delila: Grrrrrr. reow.
Kenshin: It's far away!
Oak and Delila: GRRRRRRRR. GROWL.
Kenshin: {shouting.} THERE'S A WHOLE PACK OF THEM! {audience laughs.} THEY'RE CLOSE!!!
Delila: Snarl!
Yolei: We're surrounded! What can we do?
Kenshin: Wait a minute! Werewolves can only walk around on a full-moon, right?
Yolei: Yes!
Kenshin: I'll blow up the moon!!! {audience laugh.} That God I'm wearing my DBZ outfit! {looks at the ceiling. He holds out his hand.} I'll charge up!
Oak: {slowly} Woooooooooooo.
Yolei: That'll take forever! I better help. {looks at the ceiling and holds out her hand.}
Delila: Shoo...shoo.shoo.shoo.shoo. {audience laughs.}
Kenshin: On the count of three, fire your energy! 1-2-3!
Oak and Delila: KA-BOOOM!!!
Yolei: Someone destroyed the moon before us. {BUZZ} {audience laughs and cheers.}
Gamer: We'll be right back with more Whose Line and find out who the winner is. Don't go away!
}commercial break{{
{scene fades in. The audience is applauding. C.J., Gamer, Hiei, and Kenshin are standing on the stage in a row.}
Gamer: Welcome back to Whose Line! Tonight's winner. Yolei! {Yolei is at the desk applauding.} An the rest of us has to do a game called, Irish Drinking Song! {the audience cheer.} We are going to make up a Irish drinking song, singing one line at a time. And what are we singing about, Yolei?
Yolei: The Halloween party Irish drinking song!
Gamer: The Halloween party Irish drinking song! Let's go! {piano music starts playing.}
All: Ohhhh. Ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-di!
C.J.: I went to Halloween party!
Gamer: I was happy as can be!
Hiei: It was the best there was!
Kenshin: I got drunk you see!
C.J.: I filled up on candy!
Gamer: I filled up on beer!
Hiei: I got hit by a car!
Kenshin: I went as a deer! {audience laughs.}
All: Oh. Ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-di!
Gamer: The music was a-loud!
Hiei: I went on the dance floor!
Kenshin: Everyone laughed at me!
C.J.: I peed on the front door! {audience laugh and cheer.}
Gamer: {laughing.} Boy, how embarrassing!
Hiei: I didn't care!
Kenshin: I just wanted to have fun!
C.J.: I leaked like a bear! {audience laughs.}
All: Oh. Ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-di!
Hiei: It got darker outside!
Kenshin: I was pretty scared!
C.J.: We went out the house!
Gamer: Tempers started to flare!
Hiei: People wanted to stay inside!
Kenshin: People wanted out!
C.J.: I got hit in the face!
Gamer: A leprechaun knocked me out! {audience laughs.}
All: Oh. Ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-di!
Kenshin: Now for the costume contest!
C.J.: I was gonna win!
Gamer: No one's costume was like mine!
Hiei: It was made of tin!
Kenshin: I won first place!
C.J.: I don't mean to sound rude!
Gamer: My suit was the best!
Hiei: I went as a nude! {audience laugh and cheer.}
All: Oh. Ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-ide-di! Oh. Ide-ide-ide-ide {ending.} Di-de-di- de-DIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!! {music stops and the audience cheers.}
Gamer: That's all for "Whose Line is it Anyway!" Happy Halloween!!!
{scene fades out.}