Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket. It's a shame....really.

Easily Amused : Family Is Satan's Fruitcake

"I'll meet you over there." Those four words, plus a contraction, were probably the best words spoken from my mouth since the day I told the perverted college guy across the street to do the world a favor and fuck off. Granted the latter of the two wouldn't result in a punishment so harsh, that my first kiss was delayed by a week. If it hadn't been for that stupid cuss word, Johnny Martin would've taken me to the seventh grade dance and would've ultimately kissed me. But no. My mouth had to get the better of me. But these words were different. I felt no hatred or anger, but pure and delightful bliss.
"Promise?" Shigure and I paused for a moment in front of the hotel.
"Promise." I had never been so sure of anything else before in my life. In all honesty, I had no idea how we even made it to the lobby. But the moment caught up with us as a taxi pulled up for him. He regrettedly pulled his hand away from my own and stepped into the automobile. I sighed as the car sped off but as soon as I was out of sight range, I began to jump and down like a preteen on speed. You'd swear that I had never been touched by a man before. I raced back up to my room, throwing my robe and childish pajamas to the side and reaching for a t-shirt and a pair of jeans. As soon as I tossed on my jacket I turned to the door, only to have my father block my exit. Damn it all!! His smirk was making me sick by the minute, for I knew what he had planned. He thought that because I was in a hotel room he paid for, that that automatically made me his property.
"Where ya going at this hour?" I dug my hands into the pockets of my jean jacket and shifted my weight. Please don't make me late. Please don't make me late. Please don't make me late. Or better yet, please go away. Please go away. Please go away.
"Out. I couldn't sleep." He crossed his arms over his chest. Oh God, he knows!! Parents must be given that sixth sense at the hospital or something.
"Ah. I hate it when that happens." What's this now? Was this some kind of trick or something? I know that he knows that I know what he doesn't want me to know so he's going to use what he knows to get back at what I know. No!!! "I saw Shigure in the hall awhile ago. He was giving back Sage's coat. She must've left it over at his house or something." Ah-ha!!! Wait, a minute. Just, rewind this horror flick for a moment. Did my ears just fail me (please let them have failed me), or did I hear right? Shigure was returning a jacket. My father continued. "Yeah, those two seem to be pretty chummy. Hey, didn't you have a thing for the writer?" I didn't exactly know how wide my mouth was, but I was pretty sure it was big enough to let a horse climb through.
I just couldn't believe that my own flesh and blood had just made that kind of accusation. Family's like that though. I'm beginning to wonder if family is Satan's fruitcake. You don't actually want them but they manage to pop up unexpectedly. And sometimes, they're really nasty, but you end up keeping it around until it's old. Or you get a good one and you eat it all up before you ever get the chance to share it. But this, this was even too harsh for my own brain to comprehend. How could....no. Shigure wouldn't do that to me. Right?
"No." My father quirked a fuzzy eyebrow at me.
"Oh? So you didn't have a thing for him?" I shook my head, releasing a few angry tendrils of tawny hair.
"I mean, no, Shigure wouldn't have done that." Who exactly was I trying to prove that to? I quickly pushed past him and ran towards the elevator, telling myself over and over that what he said wasn't true. Sure, it would answer the question of why he was there in the first place. But he said all those things to me and he had to have meant it. He just had to.

I reached the door of the Sohma house, only to have no one answer my loud knocks. This was odd, considering the fact that Shigure and I had just parted not even thirty minutes ago. Yes, I ran. I have this weird thing with foreign vehicles. Don't ask. I gasped as a cold hand wrapped itself around my mouth and pulled me into the brush. I could only pray that I hadn't fallen into the deadly hands of Akito. I could only handle so many injuries within a certain timespan. I struggled for a moment, answered with being held down. This guy was strong. Strong enough to control my sharp movements at least. Well, that scratches Akito. So then that leaves Hatori, Kyou, Yuki, or Ayame. So many possiblilities and yet none seemed to...
"Shh....just hold still for a second." Shigure! I relaxed within his supposed death grip. He arched his neck over the bush and finally dragged me up off the ground. I tried to open my mouth to protest his strange ways of greeting women, but I was roughly pulled by the sleeve of my jacket towards the back of the house. Shigure...sweety....you're really cute and all but next time inform me when you want to incorporate James Bond into your sexual games. We rounded the corner and scurried into the Sohma house with a little less than a creak of the door.
"Shigure!!" Tohru's voice echoed throughout the hall as the writer pushed me behind him, away from view. Several pairs of feet scrambled up beside her own, and I suddenly knew why he was hiding me from everyone. It's not very often he gets a few hours of privacy. "We were all worried when you disappeared! Is everything okay?" I almost felt guilty about this.

"Actually, i'm a bit lightheaded. I think I just need to take a long nap." He motioned for me to move with him towards his bedroom. There were a few agreements from the rest of the clan and then there was silence. Home free!! That is, until my rump met the stout legs of a stranger. I proceeded to turn around at a quick pace so that my face wouldn't land in the middle of Shigure's back. Low and behold - Hatori. I could feel my cheeks turn about a bajillion shades of red before Shigure also turned around. "Hatori! What a pleasant surprise!! Didn't know you were here!" Hatori's face was stern but suddenly softened as he glanced down at me.
"Just keep the noise down. And don't forget about your deadline, Shigure. Your poor editor might kill you or herself if you miss it." Well that was odd. I didn't get very much time to ponder Hatori's sudden kindness for Shigure's lips were already making a hasty trail down my neck while his hands fidgeted with my jacket.
"I feel like i'm sixteen again." His voice was a bit muffled by my skin but I could hear him perfectly fine. We somehow managed to make it into his room.
"It was only a three years ago for me.." He abruptly stopped the light pecks on the neck and furrowed his brow.
"I thought you were 18." I smiled up at him, refusing to embrace him for fear of his curse. But oh how I wish I could.
"Only until Friday night. " The kissing continued until I slipped on the edge of the blanket and landed smack dab on the mattress. How ironic. Shigure was hovering over me in an instant while I was trying my best to not laugh at my clumsiness. It wasn't until he rolled over and bumped his head on the wooden headboard that I burst into a fit of giggles. He was grinning as well, rubbing his head from the rude impact. I laid a delicate kiss on his noggin. It was too much for me. I pushed myself onto my side, never realizing just how small his bed actually was. I grabbed for something to pull myself up with as I descended off the mattress. Much to Shigure's dismay, it was his shirt that I grabbed. We both fell into a heap of disoriented clothing and bodies. I made a mad dash for the bed once more, only to have a long arm wrap around my waist and pull me back down to the floor.
"I give up. If this where it's intended to happen then so be it." I could hear the aggrivation in his voice so I gave in, my body slowly sliding back down to the ground.

Wednesday
 Sunrise is perhaps the best time of all. I hadn't touched the man next to me once unless it was with my mouth. Don't worry folks, I was never one for details. But not once did I trust myself to hug him or bring him closer to me because of the fact that he might turn into a slobbering mutt. Not that he didn't drool in his sleep, but at least he was human while doing it. I sighed and wrapped myself up into a tighter ball, away from the writer. I wanted nothing more than to curl up next to him but the lingering thought of Akito stained my mind and just knowing that Shigure hadn't told him anything was unsettling. I rolled over to stare up at the ceiling, catching the glaring Akito at the end of the bed, holding a dagger that I could only guess was meant for me. I went to scream but I had already been struck by the great blade. Shigure....

I woke up screaming his name. Sweat drenched my face and I feared that this was just the torture before actually dying. That there was someone even more cruel than Akito who would push me into a realm where i'd keep waking up in Shigure's arms and die by Akito's hand. It was still sunrise and amber rays began to warm my cold skin. No blood. It was all a dream. Just a horrible, horrible dream. I brought my sheet clad knees up to my chest and rested my head on the boney body parts. For the most part, I had woken up just like in my dream. I was regretting the fact that I hadn't embraced Shigure at all during the night. I felt a shift of weight on the mattress, yeah we somehow made it back up there, and figured that I caused Shigure to wake up. I shivered a little as his fingers graced my bare back. It wasn't a bad touch. It was comforting, just a bit shocking to my freezing body. His lips were now tracing the path he made with his fingers.
"NOW tell me you'll have better lays in America." I laughed softly, a little surprised that he remembered my tempermental remark.
"Don't get full of yourself..." He smiled against my shoulder before popping his head up.
"So THERE'S the beauty mark I missed!" Strange. I didn't even remember telling him that he forgot the stupid thing in his portrait.
Now would be a good time to be non allergic to cigarette smoke. In almost every movie, you'll find someone smoking in bed after a wild night of sex. It's practically the law that you have to smoke afterwards. I don't know why, though. I mean, no offense to smokers, but i'd rather wake up to the smell of pancakes or strawberries, not nicotine. Maybe it's just me, I don't know. But it felt right to light up about now. Shigure was rubbing smooth circles at the small of my back. A girl could get used to this. And then the light kisses on my shoulder returned. A girl could REALLY get used to this. But what was the point if we couldn't even hug each other? My eyes clouded over with unshed tears before I whimpered out loud.
"Hey, what's wrong? I thought you wanted this." The tears fell freely. Man, I can be such a wuss sometimes. But I think I deserve some affection!!!
"I diiiiiid." In case you're wondering, I cry like I was an extra for Lucille Ball. Except that I had no hunky Cuban, just a hot Japanese man who did wonders to a girl's reproductive system. Right. No details. Last thing I need is to tell my wonderful night to the world and end up in a sex scandal worthy of Bill Clinton, Pamela Anderson, or even Paris Hilton. Well okay, Paris' wasn't that scandalous. Even heiresses need their booty. Shigure tugged at my chin, trying to get me to look at him. Of course, I didn't give in that easily. What if he was even cuter with bed head? Then what?! It'd make my situation ten times worse is what!! I finally turned towards him.
"I don't regret this, Dusty. From day one I wanted this to happen and now that it has, i'll do anything to keep it. You have no idea what you do to me." Sweet words, but I was still skeptical. You say this now, Shigure. But wait until I hit forty. Then everything goes downhill. Literally. My chest won't stay like this forever. I lowered my head, ashamed of my tears. But he picked it back up in one swift motion. "I mean it Dusty! Dammit, I love you!!" Oh....joy!!! If there was any point in my life that I was ever called bitchy or mean or stubborn or even remotely referred to as The Grinch, then it was this one moment that made my heart grow ten times bigger. It was ten times, right? I practically tackled the poor sap and climbed on top of him. Note that I had no perverted intentions whatsoever. I leaned down so that my hair showered us and lowered my lips so close to his that ....well....they were close.
"I love you too!!!" It was meant to be a lusty, meaningful whisper. I so failed. But my chest felt tight and I thought that if I didn't yell it out, i'd burst. Yet I still couldn't embrace him...

We parted at noon, for I knew that somewhere down line, Patricia might get worried and call for the F.B.I. or something. Notice I didn't mention my father. I was still pissed at what he said to me the night before. Okay, I was ROYALLY pissed. But my mood was higher than a stoner on April 20th. Don't doubt my knowledge of potheads, for I used to have a crush on one. Granted, I don't think he ever remembered my name, but I was young and naive. I climbed into the elevator, wrapping myself in the emotion I felt. But as I neared my room I feared the worst. For in front of me, stood two brute looking men. They were either here to kill me or protect me. But I had no idea what I needed protection for. Son of a fruitloop!! They were here to kill me then!! What the fudge did I ever do anyway? Except for vandalizing my principal's car, lusting after many men, threatening people in public, kicking the mayor's son in the groin....oh buffalo. They were here because of the college guy I cussed at when I was in seventh grade. Damn it all!! My father met me at the doorway, a simper permanently pasted on his face. I just wanted to smack it off.
"After your little escapade with the writer last night, I thought it best if you remain under house arrest for the time being. At least until you fly back to New Orleans Saturday." What?!! My eyes widened as one man picked me up to put me in my room. I kicked and screamed, but to no avail. They closed the door behind them, leaving me to my isolation. Idiots!! They obviously don't know a popular rock climber when they see one. I ran to the patio door. All I had to do was shimmy down the rain gutter before and....two more men waved at me from the patio. Curses!!!! Uh-huh!!! I told you all that there was a reason I didn't like my kinfolk!! I told you!! But did you believe me?!! No! I knew he was dispicable!! I knew it!!! I plopped down on my bed. There had to be another way out of this....

A/N: Expect another chapter by tonight....hey, I was bored...