Yeah, went to the dentist and now I can't talk. So you receive a chapter instead.
Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket. Sad but true....
Easily Amused: Like A Fly On The Wall
I was in a complete state of awe and wonder. I was more than capable of breaking into song and dancing like an idiot in the streets. I was free! And I was going to see Shigure!! What more could a girl ask for? Well, a shopping spree, my own private butler, and Jim Belushi as a father. I guess i'd have to wait for Christmas for those. Damn. But like I was saying, I was utterly happy. In any moment i'd toss the umbrella out and begin to dance in the rain. But the rain was terribly cold so I decided against it. Besides, I don't need to get sick on my birthday. I was a little disappointed in the fact it was raining. I mean, is it so much to ask for a clear night on my birthday? Apparently it is. I paused before the front door of the Sohma house, gathering up a look of shock. I figured that maybe they were throwing a surprise party. The door opened with great ease, yet no lights flickered and no one was popping up to yell out a 'SURPRISE!!'. Maybe it was in a different room.
I tiptoed down the many halls, calling out for someone to show themself. In all honesty, a dark house in the rain just doesn't settle well with me. At any moment, a Freddy Kruger or psycho killer dude in a clown mask would pop out and either tear my new shirt to shreds or kill me with a cotton candy gun. Hey! It can happen! Obviously nobody else has seen 'Killer Clowns From Outer Space'. Rent it. It's a friggin classic. I managed to make it to the kitchen and grabbed the first weapon available : a chopstick. Mental post-it: Ask Shigure to invest in sharper utensils. But this would have to do for now. Besides, I read somewhere that you could kill a person with a toothpick in 250 ways. A chopstick is just a really big toothpick. Almost. I checked out every room except one and that was Akito's room. A room I had pledged to stay away from as long as possible or until I reached the possiblity of suicide. And suicide never did settle well with me. I stuck my hand inside and blindly swung the chopstick around like an idiot. When I hit nothing in a two feet radius, I let my legs follow my arms inside the room.
It was dark inside. That was probably the first thing I noticed. The second thing I noticed was the tiny dark lump on the far left wall. After a great mental debate between the cricket and Kenny Rogers, I headed towards the object. What I found was quite disturbing. Laying before me in a bloody heap, was a crumbled bird. I yelped in shock. What the hell was going on?! In two seconds flat, my question was answered by a butcher knife thrust into the wall beside my head. What the fudge?! Who threw that?! And where did they find it because I thought I searched the entire kitchen!! I slowly turned towards the knife thrower and found a small figure walking out of the shadows. Please don't let it be Akito. Please don't let it be Akito. Please don't let it be Akito. I watched the thin man stalk towards me and just as the lightning relfected upon his pale skin, I made a desperate attempt for my life with the chopstick. Akito! Damn it all! That's just my luck!!
"Get away from me Akito! I mean it! There are 250 ways to kill you with this thing!" However, my mind was coming up blank. I mean, really. It's a chopstick. I could shove it down his throat or pierce his eye or drown it in cyanide, if I knew where the cyanide was. But I doubt I could get close enough to actually stab him. The demented soul rushed at me, the insanity coulding his eyes. I barely made it out of his grasp by rolling to the side. Perhaps Lady Luck was indeed on my side for I had rolled to the side of the room with the door. I quickly made an attempt to run to the front door for an escape, but to no avail. In front of me was a puddle from the umbrella I had brought with me and my shoes were never that good with slippery surfaces. I went crashing down, face first and ending with a trickle of blood running down my lip from wear my teeth bit down too hard. I winced in pain but found myself in more trouble than a cut mouth. Akito was descending upon me, but I was in too much pain to run. I crawled to the room beside the puddle, which happened to lead to the porch, and began to throw things in Akito's path. But he had the upperhand.
I pulled myself into a tight ball as found a walking stick laying in his path. This wouldn't be good. Maybe I could laugh about it later on in life if I survived this. I cringed as the first blow was delivered to my ribs. I don't think i'll ever be able to laugh after this. Again and again, horrid blows were brought down on my body. I lost feeling after the tenth or eleventh hit. The sick bastard then snaked his fingers around my neck and slammed my body against the wall, knocking the air out of me. It hurt to breathe and I was slowly losing conciousness as his grip tightened. So much for Lady Luck. Dumb tramp!!
"I will not let another LaFayette destroy this family!!!" My head hurt and it was obvious that the rest of my birthday night would be spent in the hospital after this little violent episode.
"What...are you....talking...about?" My voice was strained by each syllable. My body began to slide up the wall and I soon found myself towering over the Sohma by a good foot.
"It was YOUR ancestor, Sabrina, who wreaked havoc on the Sohma family. It started with her handmaiden's visit. Two of the Sohma cousins fought for the wench and Sabrina stepped in. She begged the handmaiden to continue on with the triangle for Sabrina feared that one might end his life. But the girl chose anyway and the one cousin DID end his life. Sabrina mourned for the Sohma family, for even she had fallen for the head of the Sohma household. But he had taken ill after the death of his dear family member. Sabrina then sent out the curse. Nobody would be able to experience the heartbreak of love and the head of the household would always feel Sabrina's pain. Like I do. And now another LaFayette has entered this house with the same intentions!!" Interesting enough. But my dear Akito, that would break the rules of Sabrina's curse.
"That....doesn't...make sense." His eyes widened as my declaration. Hell, I shocked my own self sometimes. But the shock wore off as I felt the power of his infamous backhanded slap.
"I know my family better than you!!" No, you don't. If that was the case, you'd know how much it hurts them to not be able to embrace someone they love intimately. I struggled to find my voice beneath his grasp.
"You failed...to mention....the dark force. Sabrina...wanted to...end the suffering. Not draw.....it out. It just....happened that way." Obviously, Nana's translation left out some important facts. But the French are like that, I suppose.
"Akito!! Let her go!!" Shigure? Akito glared at his flesh and blood before tossing me into the writer's arms, thus changing him into the mutt. I, however, collapsed at his feet. I was too tired to move and too hurt to try. There was a soft touch of a cold nose followed by a sweet nudge. I groaned and patted the ground in hopes of finding a bundle of fur. And when I did, I smiled. Partially because he was real and there was a chance that I could make it out of this with all my limbs in tact. The black pooch graciously licked the blood from the corner of my mouth and turned towards my attacker, bearing the sharps canines and a growl worthy of Cerberus himself. But I didn't want Shigure to tear Akito to shreds, no matter how much he hurt me. This was what Sabrina was trying to get rid of and I wouldn't allow her work to go down the drain like last Friday's bean dip. With my last bit of strength, I reached out for the writer turned dog and laced my arm around the furry mammal so that my head rested on his back. He was quite comfy as an animal, I might add.
"No more of this...please..." I'm pretty sure he had turned back to a human by then, for I felt myself being lifted up. I'm not that sure because my eyes were crunched shut in an effort to block this situation out entirely. I'm also not sure if the man was still naked. There was a navy blue kimono hanging on the wall when I walked in so it's very possible that he put that on. I don't know. My head hurt too much recount my level of pervertedness. Though it could've very well brought me out of my pain.
"This ends here, Akito." That's right Shigure. Admit you love me to him and then take me to a damn hospital so they can knock some morphine into me. Anything to get rid of this pain.
"You do realize that if you admit love right now, she will always be in danger. I will not have her in the Sohma family!!!" Can you believe this guy? He's worse than a mother in law. You know the saying ' a woman's greatest wish is that her husband will be like his mother and her greatest fear is that she'll be like hers''? Well mine's a little different. A woman marrying into the Sohma family's greatest wish is that their curse will be broken and her worst fear is that she will wake up to a crazed Akito with a butcher knife in his hand that will send you to an unsympathetic Dr. Hatori who warned you in the first place not to fall in love. Listen to your doctors, kids. They usually know what they're talking about. Wait, Shigure! Why aren't you saying anything? "That's right. You can't say it, can you? Pathetic!" Shigure!! Shigure.....Shi....And that was it. I was out like Tim the Tool Man Taylor's Christmas light special.
Maybe if Dusty had held on a bit longer, she would've heard the determined Sohma profess that love she craved for. Maybe if Shigure had been a bit quicker, he could've done it ahead of time before she became victim to unconciousness. Either way, Dusty would wake up feeling rejected and betrayed by the one she cared for most. Life is such a bitch...
For the love of Ramen noodles, turn off the white!! I'm not friggin dead yet!! Wait, am I? I quickly pinch my arm and squeal in delight when I feel the the twinge of pain. Argh! But the whiteness!! It's a good thing I wasn't dead, otherwise i'd be calling up that cute little bald guy off 'Surprise By Design'. I mean, why does Heaven have to be so white. I'm particular of the color blue myself. Why can't St. Peter dress in a cobalt toga instead of the bland white. I scrunch my nose up and realize that I am a self proclaimed mummy. But on a good note: I wasn't dressed in white. It was a pinkish color. I'm not too pure to be pink.
"Glad to see you're up." Patricia!!? I sit up too hastily and a sharp pain shoots up my ribs. The perky redhead was by my side in an instant and slowly pushing me back down. "I didn't mean to startle you. You've been out for two days now." Wow, two days? Do you know how much sweet lovin I could've gotten in two days. Yeah, I don't know either.
"That's...a long time." Patricia sat on the side of my hospital bed and began to pick at her shirt.
"Shigure has been the most worried. Your heart stopped for thirty seconds when they first brought you here. I thought his heart had stopped beating too." Whoa whoa whoa whoa!! I was technically dead for thirty seconds?! That is the shiznites!! Dammit! I didn't even get God's autograph!! Or Jesus'!! I don't know though, with me being in Japan, I might've been sent to Buddah. I would've been happy with an autographed statue or something. I glanced up at the ceiling with a sly smile. Where are you Buddah? Elighten me dangit!!! Drop some of the wisdom on me with your John Hancock!! Now, I don't know if the wisdom dropped on me but I figured if I use Eastern religion mixed with western science and political slang, Buddah and I could meet at some kind of crossroad and reach an understanding.
I didn't say much to Patricia after that. It was nice that she had come but I couldn't let go of the fact that Shigure would still turn into a dog. He had the perfect chance! It made me giddy though to know how worried he was over me. Of course, the numerous monitors weren't doing much for me either. They just reminded me of that sex machine in the adult novelty store. I see i'm going to have to buy just to get it out of my head. Stupid machine. It was later that the doctor came in and explained that it was okay for me to travel as long as I didn't do any strenuous activities. Hint hint, wink wink. Speaking of strenuous activities, where was Shigure anyway. Maybe he'd like to come along? Bigger hint hint, wink wink and throw in a nudge nudge for good measure. I surprised myself by jumping up everytime the door opened to my room. The first time it had been Patricia with my clothes. The second time, was Elijah with my bags and the third time was my father and a nurse with a wheelchair. Sadly, no Shigure.
It was time to finally leave and I wished upon everything holy that the writer would come for me and sweep me off my feet. This was supposed to be a romance! I was supposed to climb onto the escalator and meet Shigure at the top for a flight stopping kiss, just like in 'Cruel Intentions'. But I climbed that stupid escalator and was more afraid that it would suck up my untied shoelaces then seeing Shigure at the top. But no one was waiting for me. I boarded the plane on the brink of tears. I thought that people who loved each other would do anything to see that person. My belief in every Julia Roberts movie was now running low. It didn't always end in a happy ending. There was no Richard Gere in a limo with roses. Now, all I had left to look forward to was a week in bed being pampered with cable and soup. There would also be alot of friends coming over and Nana and Pops would probably make a grand entrance. I just didn't understand it. He said he loved me. So why was I boarding the plane alone?
Shigure leaned against the railling and watched the plane take off with a little more than a small sigh. He felt bad and honestly regretted not seeing Dusty off. But he couldn't let another brutal attack fall upon her. It was best for everyone if he just let her go.
"Idiot." Shigure turned his head to meet the firey eyes of Kyou. "You're just going to let her leave aren't you?"
"Yes. Yes I am. It's best for her." The cat was followed by the doctor of death himself, Hatori.
"Then you obviously don't know her that well." Shigure's patience was growing thin. Sure, his friend was the one who had kept her alive during the first day, but it was none of his business if he let Dusty go or not. Kyou stuffed his hands into his pockets and smirked slightly.
"You know, not that it's relevant or anything but if you wanna love her, hold her, squeeze her, but don't tease her....then you got to, got to, got try ta little tenderness. A bright woman once told me that." Shigure sighed once more and smiled.
"Dusty told you that...."
"Yeah...nothing relevant ever comes out of her mouth...."
A/N: Have no fear! There will be fluff! And I know the curse explaination didn't make sense, but it will!! So no worries!