Paper Connection
By Cold-Zephyr
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst/Drama
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Description: -slash- Shawn Michaels receives a heartfelt and painful letter in his locker as the Backlash PPV ends, and finds out a lot of things he should've known before. It's no longer a one-shot, R and R please...
A/N: Chapter 4 is kind of short, but I promise you there's a lot more to follow! Really! Anyway, here goes...
-----
Chapter 4: I'm Fine, I Guess
The Raw airing for the night was long since over, and Shawn Michaels was the only one left in the locker room. He twirled the white rose Bret had sent him between his fingers, gazing at it vacantly before setting it aside and grabbing a pen and paper, now ready to write his reply to Bret Hart once again.
-
Dear Bret,
Hope you were watching Raw this week. Yes, that is indeed the white rose you gave me pinned to my shirt, which means yes, I do want to be your friend more than anything. Well, almost anything.
Okay, I'll be honest with you. As much as I want to be perfectly happy with finally being friends with you, I won't deny my inner longing for something...more. Damn it, Bret, I'm not looking for a fucking pen pal here! Can't you see? When will you ever get it into your head that I am damned crazy in love with you? The feelings I have for you are leaving me on the brink of insanity, god damn it! I'm lonely, Bret...I need you.
Not like I'll ever be seeing you again, ever, in my lifetime. It's so sad...knowing that I'm gonna end up all alone on my deathbed, while the love of my life is all the way in fucking Canada, probably feeling the same way I do. Lonely. Empty. Incomplete. And there's nothing either one of us can do about it, 'cause we never even tried.
So you wanna know how I'm doing, huh? Well, I guess I'll go with "fine," as I'm already pretty used to dragging through the shit of everyday life as an empty shell of a man. I'll break down the important happenings of this week so that you can better understand exactly what I mean when I say "fine."
Some fans in the crowd razzed me a bit over in the England house show. A mild "you screwed Bret" chant was directed at me. It's really pissing me off. The female fans in the audience softened the blow a bit, though. I can always count on 'em screaming fangirls to save the day for HBK. Hunter jumped me from behind again on Raw, the fucking bastard. I'll be sure to beat his ass bloody in the June Bad Blood PPV, so I hope you'll be watching. And I'm not exactly sure, but I think Chris Benoit was hitting on me backstage. Ugh. And did you see how that pervert pulled my tights down on national television a few weeks ago? The nerve! I wasted no time brushing him off, though. I know I'm way too hung up on you to even try with anyone else, especially not with Benoit. That man gives me the creeps. Needless to say, you were on my mind the whole week long. And beyond my own control, you always will be for a long time to come, I'm sure of that.
Yep, my standard for "fine" has lowered considerably these past few weeks.
I'm not ever gonna get over my feelings for you, Bret, so I won't even bother trying. Since there's not much I can do about, well, us, I suppose I'll try to shelve the loneliness aside for now and settle for the next best thing, which of course, is friendship. The emptiness won't get better, but hey, I'll be..."fine." Life from this point is bittersweet at best.
I really hope you write me back, Bret, I'm looking forward to hearing from you. Though only on paper, I cherish our little connection, and I'm glad we're keeping in touch.
Yours,
Shawn
-
Guilt mixed with amusement as Bret finished reading Shawn's letter. Deep in his heart, even Bret knew that friendship wouldn't be enough for either one of them. But what could he possibly do about it?
Although the general tone of the letter was rather sad, Shawn Michaels somehow always found a way to make Bret smile, which is one of the reasons why Bret fell for him in the first place.
-----
Stay tuned! More soon, I hope. 'Till next time, this is Cold-Zephyr signing out.
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst/Drama
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Description: -slash- Shawn Michaels receives a heartfelt and painful letter in his locker as the Backlash PPV ends, and finds out a lot of things he should've known before. It's no longer a one-shot, R and R please...
A/N: Chapter 4 is kind of short, but I promise you there's a lot more to follow! Really! Anyway, here goes...
-----
Chapter 4: I'm Fine, I Guess
The Raw airing for the night was long since over, and Shawn Michaels was the only one left in the locker room. He twirled the white rose Bret had sent him between his fingers, gazing at it vacantly before setting it aside and grabbing a pen and paper, now ready to write his reply to Bret Hart once again.
-
Dear Bret,
Hope you were watching Raw this week. Yes, that is indeed the white rose you gave me pinned to my shirt, which means yes, I do want to be your friend more than anything. Well, almost anything.
Okay, I'll be honest with you. As much as I want to be perfectly happy with finally being friends with you, I won't deny my inner longing for something...more. Damn it, Bret, I'm not looking for a fucking pen pal here! Can't you see? When will you ever get it into your head that I am damned crazy in love with you? The feelings I have for you are leaving me on the brink of insanity, god damn it! I'm lonely, Bret...I need you.
Not like I'll ever be seeing you again, ever, in my lifetime. It's so sad...knowing that I'm gonna end up all alone on my deathbed, while the love of my life is all the way in fucking Canada, probably feeling the same way I do. Lonely. Empty. Incomplete. And there's nothing either one of us can do about it, 'cause we never even tried.
So you wanna know how I'm doing, huh? Well, I guess I'll go with "fine," as I'm already pretty used to dragging through the shit of everyday life as an empty shell of a man. I'll break down the important happenings of this week so that you can better understand exactly what I mean when I say "fine."
Some fans in the crowd razzed me a bit over in the England house show. A mild "you screwed Bret" chant was directed at me. It's really pissing me off. The female fans in the audience softened the blow a bit, though. I can always count on 'em screaming fangirls to save the day for HBK. Hunter jumped me from behind again on Raw, the fucking bastard. I'll be sure to beat his ass bloody in the June Bad Blood PPV, so I hope you'll be watching. And I'm not exactly sure, but I think Chris Benoit was hitting on me backstage. Ugh. And did you see how that pervert pulled my tights down on national television a few weeks ago? The nerve! I wasted no time brushing him off, though. I know I'm way too hung up on you to even try with anyone else, especially not with Benoit. That man gives me the creeps. Needless to say, you were on my mind the whole week long. And beyond my own control, you always will be for a long time to come, I'm sure of that.
Yep, my standard for "fine" has lowered considerably these past few weeks.
I'm not ever gonna get over my feelings for you, Bret, so I won't even bother trying. Since there's not much I can do about, well, us, I suppose I'll try to shelve the loneliness aside for now and settle for the next best thing, which of course, is friendship. The emptiness won't get better, but hey, I'll be..."fine." Life from this point is bittersweet at best.
I really hope you write me back, Bret, I'm looking forward to hearing from you. Though only on paper, I cherish our little connection, and I'm glad we're keeping in touch.
Yours,
Shawn
-
Guilt mixed with amusement as Bret finished reading Shawn's letter. Deep in his heart, even Bret knew that friendship wouldn't be enough for either one of them. But what could he possibly do about it?
Although the general tone of the letter was rather sad, Shawn Michaels somehow always found a way to make Bret smile, which is one of the reasons why Bret fell for him in the first place.
-----
Stay tuned! More soon, I hope. 'Till next time, this is Cold-Zephyr signing out.