Hai: Yes, or right.
Okaa-san: Mother
Otou-san: Father
-chan: A friendly suffix to address children or female friends. Indicates equal or lower social standing.
-sama: Lord or Lady
-hime: Princess
Nii-chan: Elder brother
Chapter Thirteen:
Mitsukai awoke to the sound of childish humming, and the scent of burnt toast. Mama always burnt the toast and she thought for a brief moment she was home. She blinked bleary, gold eyes at the small girl sitting on the edge of the bed. The child was contently playing with a worn doll. It appeared to be the same hyperactive child, from the other morning.
"Tsuki-chan?" Mitsukai asked uncertainly in a slightly raspy voice. She was almost certain that was the name Sesshoumaru called the child.
Tsuki gasped and smiled, her soft eyes meeting Mitsukai's brighter. The child's eyes were strange despite their normal hue. Tsuki's eyes were a solid chocolate brown, with almost no visible white. The pupils, unlike Mitsukai's animal like slits, were round and dilated.
"Mitsukai-chan!" Tsuki cried happily dropping the tattered doll on the blanket in her excitement.
She crawled on all fours until her small face was inches from Mitsukai's. She then covered her mouth with her free hand and peered at the older girl with wide, apologetic eyes.
"Sorry, Mitsukai-chan," she whispered in an exaggerated tone. "Tsuki forgot to be quiet so that Mitsukai-chan could rest. But Mitsukai-chan woke up, so Tsuki thinks, maybe, it's okay."
Mitsukai nodded slowly unsure what to answer. She was unused to having conversations with anyone except for family. Tsuki grinned and ran a chubby finger long one of the stripes that marked Mitsukai's cheek. "Mitsukai has pretty stripes." She mused half to herself. "like Sesshoumaru-sama."
She gave a small downtrodden sigh and continued, "Tsuki wants stripes too."
"Sesshoumaru has stripes?"
"Sesshoumaru-sama," Tsuki corrected as she retrieved her doll. The child looked thoughtful and bit her lower lip cutely. "Though Sesshoumaru-sama is Mitsukai-chan's otou-san, so Tsuki thinks it's okay for Mitsukai not to call Sesshoumaru-sama, Sesshoumaru-sama," she said with a small smile obviously pleased with her own reasoning.
Mitsukai licked her lips and her heart hammered in her chest. Does everyone know but me? But then it can't be true, he's not that much older than I am. Sesshoumaru did resemble her a great deal or rather she resembled him. In her sixteen years of life she had never seen another person with silvery hair and golden eyes. Sesshoumaru, looked different than she. He looked, she realized with a pang of something she could not name, almost normal. She wished she could as well.
There were many questions floating through her mind. They seemed to compound daily. Questions that demanding answers but, none would be given. Arguments erupted, when she was very young, bitter verbal battles, between her uncle and mother. Souta demanded, that Mama tell her the truth. What was the truth? That she was some creature, a monster cloaked in almost human flesh?
She was a monster; her actions were proof of that fact. She had butchered a man, tore him to pieces, when she could have simply fled. She had relished the sensation of flesh tearing beneath her claws and his screams of terror. It was only when he had stopped screaming, she realized the horror of her actions. Guilt over her actions had begun eating away at her; she would often see her victim's face in her dreams.
That last second of utter panic before his life was snuffed out, played in her nightmares. She was only guilty of defending herself, or so her mother had claimed. The matter was closed and not to be spoken of again. Mitsukai obeyed her mother's wishes, even as she felt as though she were being ripped apart inside. She was not a good person, and she was not normal, despite her mother's protestations. Mama cries so much and it's all because of me.
Mitsukai swallowed a whimper, as her stomach violently cramped. She bit her lip, and swallowed the bile rising in the back of her throat. When she awoke she felt almost well, though still slightly weak, and now she was, once again, wracked with pain. A pang of disappointment filled her; she would likely spending the rest of the day in bed. Mitsukai sighed despairingly and rubbed small circles on her belly.
She was pulled from her thoughts by a childish giggle. Schooling her face into almost normal lines, though unable to hide the pain in her eyes, she flashed the child a questioning gaze. Tsuki grinned while manipulating her doll's arms so that the toy clapped.
"Mitsukai-chan was thinking!" Tsuki said with utmost certainty and tapped her forehead for emphasis. Mitsukai's eyes narrowed and she huffed in annoyance. "Don't be mad, Mitsukai-chan. Sesshoumaru-sama makes that same face when he's thinking. That's how Tsuki knows."
Mitsukai scowled and continued to nurse her abdomen. She ignored the chatter child and stared up at the ceiling. A fan rotated lazily against it's the ceilings pale peach surface. The walls were painted to match the ceiling and were stenciled with sage colored ivy. The bed linens matched the walls perfectly. It was a lovely room, complete with a hardwood floor and tasteful furniture. If nothing else, Sesshoumaru had great taste in interior decorating.
She returned her attention to Tsuki seemingly oblivious she was being ignored. Her speech patterns were strange and rather annoying. Especially considering Mitsukai's, now splitting headache.
"Why do you keep talking like that?" Mitsukai snapped, a bit harsher than she intended.
Tsuki set the doll in her lap and tilted her head as if pondering something of great importance. "Tsuki talks, like Tsuki," the girl replied with a shrug.
"Why don't you speak like a normal person?" Mitsukai snarled in irritation. Tsuki blinked at her in confusion. Mitsukai sighed while rubbing her temple and explained, "Like me?"
Tsuki seemed to consider for a moment, then she pursed her lips and asked, "Then who would Mitsukai-chan talk like?"
Mitsukai sighed in defeat. Well that settled that. She turned her head to one side and peered out the bedroom window. The sky was slate gray and a harsh breeze blew through the trees. It would rain today; she could smell it in the air. Despite her headache, she felt restless. She turned her attention to the little girl practically sitting on top of her. After Mitsukai made several abortive attempts at speech, Tsuki stopped her random chatter abruptly and made an inquiry,
"Nii-chan says Tsuki, talks too much but Tsuki doesn't think so. What does Mitsukai-chan think? Or should Tsuki call Mitsukai-chan, Mitsukai-sama?"
Mitsukai propped herself in her elbows and frowned. Why would she call me Mitsukai-sama and for that matter why does she call Sesshoumaru, Sesshoumaru-sama? "Tsuki," she began but was interrupted by the child's downtrodden sigh.
"Tsuki is so confused," the child admitted shaking her heard and began to run her little fingers through Mitsukai's silvery hair carefully untangling any knots she found. She wished she remembered to bring her brush from home. If she had it, she could fix Mitsukai's beautiful hair.
"Mitsukai is confused too," Mitsukai said with a small quirk of lips. She winced when the child, pulled a bit too hard on a stubborn knot. Gently untwining her hair from Tsuki's grasp, Mitsukai pulled the silken mass in two hands and allowed it to cascade down her back. Sitting up completely, she leaned against the headboard, and regarded the small girl that gazed at her, with barely concealed adoration. Tsuki smiled once more and returned her attention to the battered doll.
"Tsuki?" she repeated as she continued to comb her fingers through her hair. She loathed having messy hair.
"Hm?" the little girl answered as she began redressing her doll.
"Why do you think Sesshoumaru..er -sama is my otou-san?" Mitsukai asked carefully.
"Mitsukai-chan looks like Sesshoumaru-sama," Tsuki said simply, not taking her eyes from her task.
Mitsukai nodded, the resemblance was undeniable. There were a lot of people who resembled one another, that did not make them family. "He can't be," Mitsukai stated logically. "At most he's twenty or twenty one."
Tsuki tilted her head sideways and nodded sagely, "Tsuki thinks that's old." The child shrugged and without taking a breath launched into another tirade of questions, "How old is Mitsukai-chan? Tsuki thinks Mitsukai-chan is pretty. Does Mitsukai-chan have any brothers or sisters? Tsuki has three big brothers. They don't like Tsuki too much, but Tsuki doesn't mind."
"Why don't they like you?" Mitsukai wondered, her voice colored with sympathy.
Tsuki sighed the sigh of martyrs and replied, "Tsuki has a different Mama, than Tsuki's brothers."
Mitsukai nodded in sympathy. "Juri-san is your okaa-san?" she asked conversationally.
Tsuki grinned and shyly nodded. Mitsukai managed a faint smile and asked, "What do you know about Sesshoumaru?"
Tsuki brightened visibly and beamed. It was obvious just from her expression, that she adored him. "Sesshoumaru-sama," Tsuki corrected sternly. "Is the best person in the whole world."
"You really like him, huh?" Mitsukai replied stating the obvious. Tsuki nodded in response and began rocking the doll in her lap. "What else?" Mitsukai prodded. If Tsuki knew Sesshoumaru perhaps she knew what he or they were.
"Umm..Sesshoumaru-sama is the umm.," she stopped and stuck her tongue out cutely as if thinking. Remembering she grinned, and exclaimed pridefully, "Sesshoumaru-sama is the teriyaki of the western lands."
Mitsukai looked at the girl in complete bafflement. "Um. Teriyaki of the western lands?" she repeated slowly not completely sure she heard correctly.
Tsuki nodded vigorously in agreement then clapped her hands happily. "That means Mitsukai-chan is a princess," she explained proudly.
"Of what?" Mitsukai asked with a sarcastic snort. "The Ramen providence?" She sighed inwardly; she should have known not, to interrogate a six year old for pertinent information.
Tsuki's eyes narrowed, obviously offend, and she hugged her doll. "Mitsukai-hime is making fun of Tsuki. Tsuki doesn't think that's very nice," Tsuki chided with a pout.
Mitsukai sighed for the twentieth time since she awoke and said, "Mitsukai is sorry."
Tsuki grinned all hurt feelings, having disappeared as suddenly as they came. She patted the elder girl's hand. "Tsuki forgives Mitsukai-hime."
Mitsukai smiled faintly and shifted on the bed. Idly she wondered where Sesshoumaru or her mother could be. She also wondered why she was stuck with the delightfully annoying Tsuki. "So Sesshoumaru, he's the um.. Teriyaki of the western lands," Mitsukai reaffirmed, skepticism evident in her voice. She would continue to question the girl; after all she had nothing better in which to do.
"Hai," the child answered once again preoccupied with her doll.
"And I'm a princess," she repeated slowly waiting for the child's answer.
"Hai," answered Tsuki then looked up at Mitsukai quizzically. "Where else does Mitsukai-hime have stripes?" she asked innocently as she blinked her brown eyes.
The question caught Mitsukai, completely off guard, and she blushed crimson. "I'm not telling," she murmured stiffly and crossed her arms protectively over her chest.
Tsuki pouted and crawled into the elder girl's lap. Mitsukai looked away in silent refusal.
"Please, Mitsukai-chan." Tsuki pleaded as she caged the elder girl's face in her small hands attempting to turn her gaze forward. "Tsuki really wants to know!"
"No," Mitsukai answered firmly, her cheeks a blazing crimson. There was no amount of pleading in the world that could sway Mitsukai, into disclosing their location. It was just too embarrassing.
"Please?" the little girl pleaded.
"No!"
Tsuki sighed and pouted, "Tsuki wishes she had stripes."
Mitsukai looked stricken and whispered softly, "No, you don't." Her bottom lip trembled ever so slightly. She would give anything to look normal, to be normal. Little Tsuki had no idea, what it was like to be different. Then again, perhaps she did. Her golden eyes appeared unfocused, staring ahead at nothing.
"Tsuki wants to know where else Mitsukai-chan has stripes!" the child huffed stubbornly, completely ignoring the elder girl's protests.
Mitsukai closed her eyes slowly as her stomach lurched. "Why?" she almost gasped, and reopened her eyes.
"Because..umm.. Tsuki wants to know!" was the child's demanded huffily. According to Tsuki her desire was reason enough.
Mitsukai, 'hmphed,' and replied sardonically, "Just because you want it, doesn't mean you're going to get it."
Tsuki scowled and shook her doll menacingly, "Mitsukai-hime is a meanie!"
Mitsukai snorted and returned her attention to the window. The barest hint of rain pattered on the windows and the sky was filled with thick dark clouds. Whatever storm was brewing would be fierce. Annoyed she flicked her eyes to the small girl still, shooting daggers at her. It was none of her business where her stripes where. Though part of Mitsukai knew there was no harm in telling.
She smirked and replied in a bored tone, "You're an annoying brat." Inwardly she knew it was pitiful picking on a small child, but the devil inside would not allow the argument to simply drop.
"You're a bad puppy and you have fleas!" Tsuki screeched and socked Mitsukai in the arm. The child stuck out her tongue and ran from the room leaving a bewildered Mitsukai.
"Oh yeah! Well, it takes one to know one!" Mitsukai retorted to the child's fleeing form. Mitsukai smirked, inordinately pleased with herself.
"A bad puppy with fleas?" Mitsukai repeated to herself as she settled down on the bed. She peered up at the ceiling fan as it twirled lazily against the ceiling. "Okay then."
Yawning sleepily she stretched, tensing her body into one long line. She felt slightly guilty about picking on Tsuki, but it was not the girl's business where her markings where located. They were personal. Briefly she considered chasing the child down, if for nothing else to teach her some insults that were actually insulting. She was stirred from her musing by someone affectionately tucking a lock of her hair behind one ear.
The scent of rose oil drifted to her nose and instantly she knew the identity of the person.
"Mommy," she greeted, with a faint smile. She came back.
"Hey sweetie," her mother replied affectionately and placed the tray she had been carrying down on the nightstand. "How do you feel?" Kagome asked seriously, as she stroked her daughter's cheek.
Mitsukai grinned and replied, "I beat up a six year old." She frowned inwardly at the unfathomed pride she felt over her victory.
"That's my girl," Kagome answered wryly. The bed shifted under Kagome's light weight as she sat down beside Mitsukai.
Kagome gazed down at her daughter. It did not seem all that long ago that she was a tiny child. She could remember with utmost clarity the day she was born.
The agonizing pain she had felt seemed infinite. She had felt as if she was being torn apart from the inside out. Which had not been too far from the truth.
Despite the long and agonizing labor the Mitsukai had been tiny, fitting almost perfectly in her grandfather's cupped hands. Kagome had passed near the end of delivery, but had awoken soon after. When she gazed downward she saw her child, latched contently to a breast. It was then that Kagome had smiled, for the first time, in nearly a year.
She had examined every inch of the new life she held in her arms. Mitsukai's skin had been pale, but pink from the birthing and her ears pointed. Her heart sank, but never the less the smile, had never wavered. It was when her daughter's tiny-clawed hand had wrapped around her finger, that cruel realization returned.
Her precious, angelic little daughter had been born with claws, stripes and the slit pupils of a youkai. She had known the infant would not be human, but had not prepared herself for the sight that greeted her. Optimism was the crutch of fools; there was nothing that could have made the situation 'alright.'
Kagome was still uncertain who had started crying first, she or her baby. The infant Mitsukai's wail was more of a high-pitched whimper, than crying. She had once heard a small dog make near the exact same sound. The new mother Kagome drew a shuddering breath and thrust the newborn infant away from her.
"Mama?" Mitsukai whispered frightened by the sudden sadness filling her mother's being.
Kagome shook her head, chasing the memory from her mind, and smiled down at her daughter. Everything would be fine now, it had to be.
"Do you want to eat something?" she asked while stroking her daughter's clammy cheek.
Mitsukai's skin was ashen and her eyes dulled. She looked worse now, than she had just yesterday. Mitsukai swallowed hard and shook her head in refusal.
"Sweetie," Kagome said in a firm but affectionate tone. "You need to eat."
"I'm not hungry," Mitsukai answered almost tearfully. A peal of thunder echoed through the room causing her to jump. She threw her arms around her mother and forcibly pulled her to lie beside her.
"Misty-chan?" Kagome whispered both concerned and frightened, over her daughter's odd behavior.
"What am I?" Mitsukai whispered into her mother's shoulder and tightened her grip.
Kagome struggled and found herself stuck fast in her daughter's iron grasp. Even ill Mitsukai was many times stronger than she. "Mitsukai." she stated firmly. Let me go!"
Mitsukai obeyed, but kept her face buried into her mother's shoulder. Mama had Sesshoumaru's scent all over her. Mitsukai sighed and relaxed as her mother began combing through her hair. When she next spoke her voice was soft and filled with pleading. "Please tell me."
"Sesshoumaru and I want to tell you together, Misty-chan," her mother explained, silently praying she would be satisfied.
"You mean my father?" Mitsukai almost sneered, her voice muffled behind Kagome's shoulder. Her mother did not answer, but went very still and began to cry. So it is true. She nuzzled her mother's neck apologetically, pleased when her mother finally calmed.
"Where is everyone?" Mitsukai asked changing the subject. She had one answer and realized there was, someone who knew the rest. That someone was would likely be more than willing to tell her.
Kagome sniffed and wiped her eyes on the heels on her hands. "Sesshoumaru has a meeting with his publisher and Juri-san had to run home for a moment. Kagome smiled faintly and continued. "So it's just you and me."
"Okay," Mitsukai answered with a small smile, thinking on what she would do the moment her mother left her alone. "Can I take a bath?" she said in a mock pleading tone.
"It's storming outside Misty-chan," Kagome said with an apologetic frown.
"I'll be quick," Mitsukai pleaded earnestly. "I just want to wash my hair."
Kagome sighed and rolled her eyes playfully. "You and your hair," she said in mock annoyance and tussled her daughter's silvery mane. She smiled and pecked her daughter's cheek, "I'll run you a bath."
Mitsukai smiled, but it did not quiet reach her eyes. "Thanks Mama."
Kagome walked quickly down the hall and into the large master bathroom. She leaned against the wall as the tub filled with warm water and rich bubbles. Mitsukai knew Sesshoumaru was her father. That knowledge should have made informing Mitsukai, of her heritage, simpler. Yet, it did not. How could she explain that Mitsukai was a youkai and that she, Kagome had always known? Worse, would Mitsukai forgive her for keeping that knowledge a secret? Kagome did not know, and was unwilling to risk her own child's spite.
Satisfied with the amount of water in the tub and that the bathroom itself was warm enough Kagome left the bathroom.
"Mitsy-chan, your bath is ready," Kagome called as she walked down the hall. She frowned when she received no reply.
"Sweetheart?" Kagome called softly, thinking perhaps Mitsukai had dozed off.
She froze when she entered Mitsukai's room. The bed was empty and the curtains billowed in the wide-open window. Mitsukai was nowhere to be found.