Chapter Two:
The
Doughnut Shop
After a few hours of head banging to their favorite bands... the three main Bishounen decide to go to Abbe's Doughnuts and get something to eat, calling up Sano (their drummer), Vincent (back-up vocals and keys), and Mobias... partially to make fun of... partially to make Aud cry....
Seph: talking to old woman that runs the doughnut shop You got any glazed doughnuts...?
Old Woman: looks Nope.
Seph: How 'bout Jelly doughnuts...?
Old Woman: looks back Uh-un.
Seph: Ya got any Bavarian Cream Filled doughnuts...?
Old Woman: looks Sorry... fresh out.
Seph: getting ticked off Fine! Got any of those pink frosted doughnuts with yellow sprinkles?!
Old woman: checks again.................. Wait a minute... I'll go check... slowly walks to the back, taking at least two minutes per step
Seph: getting incredibly annoyed, starts tapping foot and looking at his imaginary wrist-watch.
Meanwhile... Kenshin and the rest of the guys... and Aud... All sat outside at a small and dark black table, hidden from the sun light...
Kenshin: looks to Aud What do you suppose is taking him so long...?
Aud: glances over and sees Seph inside, tapping his foot impatiently as he waited for the old woman to make it past the register I think he might have angered the old lady that runs the place...
Razzy: What a berk... Even I wouldn't anger an old granny... It's just... not right.
Vincent: What a jerk! I bet he wouldn't act like that if it was his mother!
Sano: You are right... takes out a silver flask and swigs down a very large swig of Sake Seph is a major Mama's boy...
Everyone: raises glass of Champagne which they got from God knows where Here, here!
Seph: glances out the corner of his eye as everyone but Razzy takes a drink from their Champagne What the...?
Mobias: stares at hands I don't know why you would compare ME, of all people, to that... that girl you call Aud. Her hands are nowhere near as beautiful as mine, and she is nowhere near as smart...!
Kenshin: cradles Aud in his arms You are right about being smarter than her... But you are SO wrong about the hand thing! I mean... really...! You've got friggin oven mitts for hands you nasty homo!
Aud: sniffles and nods head Uh-huh...
Kenshin: And what's more... Your name is Mobias...! You are Mobias! Mobias! Mobias! Mobias!
Aud: curls more into Kenshin, breaking out into more tears
Kenshin: Sorry Aud... Not you... It... Over there...! points and hisses
Aud: sticks tongue out at the huge-handed freak
Razzy: points and laughs Ha! You got told by a red head!
Sano: already incredibly drunk from too many random swigs from many different flasks passes out
Vincent: And not just any red head... oh no... But Kenshin... what is this world coming to...?
Kimuri: pops out of nowhere A really friggen creepy one for that fact.
Kenshin: Kimuri?! drops Aud out of his arms
Aud: falls to floor Ahhhhh!!!! crash
Kenshin: What the heck are you doing here you friggen idiot?!
Kimuri: looks around and takes Mobias's seat I probably just came for the free doughnuts... probably also for the entertainment.
Kenshin: pulls Aud up and to his side Greaaaaaaat.... rolls eyes
Kimuri: looks to Aud And also to annoy Aud... seeing as I'm her new bishounen...
Kenshin: WHAT?!
Aud: Uhhh... I can explain...
Kenshin: DO so!
Aud: I would... but I cant.... Not here... not now... not ever.
Razzy: Berks...
Kimuri: smiles stupidly Ya know you love me Aud...
Aud: eye twitches
Kimuri: Admit it... ya love me.
Aud: eye twitches again
Kimuri: reaches across table and grabs Aud's hand, smiling even stupider... if possible I love you...
Aud: smiles Why Kimuri... I never knew you could be so sweet...
Kenshin: jaw drops But... You... YOU LOVE ME!!!!!!!
Kimuri: Ha! No... not anymore Kenny-boy... She has fallen for the awesome long purple hair and scythe-wielding higher demon... and not a stupid redheaded, reverse-blade using human! HA! HA-HA!
Kenshin: growls some incoherent Japanese curse under his breath
Kimuri: kisses Aud's hand A rose would smell as sweet, or some other thing like that... grins
Aud: blushes
Kenshin: tempted to draw his Sakabatou and turn Kimuri into a reverse blade shish kabob
Kimuri: ready to fight to the death over Aud
Aud: a bit creeped out that the two bishounen were about to be at each other's throats.
Vincent: Great... Two idiots fighting over an even bigger idiot... What a fight this will be...
Razzy: Yeah! Its gonna be great! grabs a tub of popcorn-flavored souls and plops down on a couch that just appeared from who knows where
Vincent: sighs Oh well... it will be amusing while we wait for Seph... goes ands sits on the couch next to Razzy goes to take a handful of the "popcorn"
Razzy: hisses and covers the tub of souls Mine!!!! scootches to the edge of the couch away from Vincent
Vincent: sighs again and takes out a large soda I just wish Seph would hurry up...
Back inside the doughnut shop... We find Seph about ready to whip out a pistol and shoot either himself or the old woman, struggling to decide which one needed to be put out of their misery more...
Old woman: almost past the cash register
Seph: reaches into black trenchy and fiddles around with the pistol taking it out a bit, and then putting it back, taking it out a bit, and then putting it back again
Old woman: keels over
Seph: lets go of the pistol and looks over the counter at the old woman Ma'am...? Umm... Excuse me...? Hello...?! jumps over the counter and pokes at the old woman Hello...? Are you dead...?
Old woman: deflates
Seph: Ewww... pokes again at the sack of deflated skin Hey...! Cool! This is fun...! pokes it a few more times pokes Heh-heh-heh... pokes Heh-heh-heh. looks around Hmmm... picks up the skin and puts it on his head I am Cannibal! Here me roa-
Sano: finally has regained consciousness steps into shop blink blink
Seph: whips the old woman's deflated skin off You didn't see or hear anything, I swear you didn't!
Sano: Uhh... ok... I... didn't...?
Seph: kicks the skin aside Exactly.
Sano: a bit disgusted So Seph... where's the doughnuts... We're all waitin'
Seph: can smell the fresh baked doughnuts in the room only a few feet away C'mon Sano, the goods are right in the room next to us!
Sano: Uhhh... all right...?
So, Seph and Sano go into the room. In it, they were surrounded by innumerable amounts of various kinds of doughnuts. Sano grabbed a handful of a certain type of doughnut and looked around for something to put them in.
Sano: Seph...! Where's the bags and boxes and crap?!
Seph: looks around Hmmm... idea pops into head Wait right here! runs out of room
Sano: Seph! But- oh, never mind... continues piling the doughnuts into his arms
Seph: jumps back into the room with something on his shoulder
Sano: What the heck is that?!
Seph: spreads the thing out across a table
Sano: sees the distinct color and wrinkles of an old lady that had been conveniently shaped into a draw-string bag Seph... that's nasty...
Seph: snaps death glare towards Sano No Sano... It's not nasty... It's... useful...
Sano: shrugs I guess your right.... fills the old woman bag with hundreds of dollars worth of doughnuts We don't have to pay for this crap do we...?
Seph: No Sano, no we don't.
Sano: grins and slings the "granny bag" over his shoulder Groovy does peace sign
Seph: does peace sign back Verizon.
Sano: Yup...
Both step outside to find Kenshin and Kimuri standing in front of each other slapping at each other's hands...
Seph: looks to Razzy Lemme guess... Kenshin found out about Kimuri being Aud's new Bishounen... Right...?
Razzy: nods Mm-hmm. takes a fistful of souls and devours them
Vincent: completely bored, looking still at Kenshin and Kimuri Did you guys remember to say thank you to the poor old lady inside?
Sano: looks at the bag over his shoulder Uhhh...
Seph: puts hand over Sano's mouth Of course we did!
Vincent: not paying much attention at all to them Good...
Razzy: totally sucked into the fight C'mon Kimuri! Don't be a whimp! Hit him back!
Kimuri: She's mine!!!!
Kenshin: slapping vigorously No Kimuri! She's mine!!!
Suddenly, Lizz and Em walk in.
Lizz: Aud... what'd you do now?
Aud: Nothing...!
Em: She's lying Lizz.
Lizz: I know Em... I know.
Em: She should be punished for her lies.
Lizz: Yes... Yes she should. whips out box of J.D. chocolates and hands a handful of gold ones to Em Here Em... Eat up.
EM: tears into chocolate, foaming at the mouth
Lizz: taunts Aud by eating them slowly in front of her Man these things are good... Want some more Em...?
Em: rips the box out of Lizz's hands and opens her mouth wider than Aud and Lizz thought was possible, pouring all the J.D into her mouth
Lizz: tears in eyes What...what are you doing Em...? That's my J.D....!
Em: foaming more at mouth, can smell the Sake on Sano's breath jumps him and steals all 57 of his "secret" flasks
Sano: My Sake! My whiskey! My vodka!
Vincent: That's not vodka... that's moonshine...
Sano: Er, yea... My moonshine!
Em: opens them all and dumps them into her mouth,
Sano: cries and mourns the loss of his alcohol.
Lizz: still crying because she only had one of the J.D.'s Em! Calm down!
Aud: crying because she didn't have any of the J.D.'s
Kenshin & Kimuri: still slapping and fighting
Razzy: turns to Vincent Pathetic humans.
Vincent: I agree...
Seph: grabs the granny bag from Sano and sits next to Vincent and Razzy Doughnuts...?
Vincent: shrugs and pulls a Rum doughnut out of the bag Dude... What the heck is up with that bag...? It's all cold... and wrinkly... and... OH MY GOD YOU MURDERED THE OLD LADY!!!
The
Doughnut Shop
After a few hours of head banging to their favorite bands... the three main Bishounen decide to go to Abbe's Doughnuts and get something to eat, calling up Sano (their drummer), Vincent (back-up vocals and keys), and Mobias... partially to make fun of... partially to make Aud cry....
Seph: talking to old woman that runs the doughnut shop You got any glazed doughnuts...?
Old Woman: looks Nope.
Seph: How 'bout Jelly doughnuts...?
Old Woman: looks back Uh-un.
Seph: Ya got any Bavarian Cream Filled doughnuts...?
Old Woman: looks Sorry... fresh out.
Seph: getting ticked off Fine! Got any of those pink frosted doughnuts with yellow sprinkles?!
Old woman: checks again.................. Wait a minute... I'll go check... slowly walks to the back, taking at least two minutes per step
Seph: getting incredibly annoyed, starts tapping foot and looking at his imaginary wrist-watch.
Meanwhile... Kenshin and the rest of the guys... and Aud... All sat outside at a small and dark black table, hidden from the sun light...
Kenshin: looks to Aud What do you suppose is taking him so long...?
Aud: glances over and sees Seph inside, tapping his foot impatiently as he waited for the old woman to make it past the register I think he might have angered the old lady that runs the place...
Razzy: What a berk... Even I wouldn't anger an old granny... It's just... not right.
Vincent: What a jerk! I bet he wouldn't act like that if it was his mother!
Sano: You are right... takes out a silver flask and swigs down a very large swig of Sake Seph is a major Mama's boy...
Everyone: raises glass of Champagne which they got from God knows where Here, here!
Seph: glances out the corner of his eye as everyone but Razzy takes a drink from their Champagne What the...?
Mobias: stares at hands I don't know why you would compare ME, of all people, to that... that girl you call Aud. Her hands are nowhere near as beautiful as mine, and she is nowhere near as smart...!
Kenshin: cradles Aud in his arms You are right about being smarter than her... But you are SO wrong about the hand thing! I mean... really...! You've got friggin oven mitts for hands you nasty homo!
Aud: sniffles and nods head Uh-huh...
Kenshin: And what's more... Your name is Mobias...! You are Mobias! Mobias! Mobias! Mobias!
Aud: curls more into Kenshin, breaking out into more tears
Kenshin: Sorry Aud... Not you... It... Over there...! points and hisses
Aud: sticks tongue out at the huge-handed freak
Razzy: points and laughs Ha! You got told by a red head!
Sano: already incredibly drunk from too many random swigs from many different flasks passes out
Vincent: And not just any red head... oh no... But Kenshin... what is this world coming to...?
Kimuri: pops out of nowhere A really friggen creepy one for that fact.
Kenshin: Kimuri?! drops Aud out of his arms
Aud: falls to floor Ahhhhh!!!! crash
Kenshin: What the heck are you doing here you friggen idiot?!
Kimuri: looks around and takes Mobias's seat I probably just came for the free doughnuts... probably also for the entertainment.
Kenshin: pulls Aud up and to his side Greaaaaaaat.... rolls eyes
Kimuri: looks to Aud And also to annoy Aud... seeing as I'm her new bishounen...
Kenshin: WHAT?!
Aud: Uhhh... I can explain...
Kenshin: DO so!
Aud: I would... but I cant.... Not here... not now... not ever.
Razzy: Berks...
Kimuri: smiles stupidly Ya know you love me Aud...
Aud: eye twitches
Kimuri: Admit it... ya love me.
Aud: eye twitches again
Kimuri: reaches across table and grabs Aud's hand, smiling even stupider... if possible I love you...
Aud: smiles Why Kimuri... I never knew you could be so sweet...
Kenshin: jaw drops But... You... YOU LOVE ME!!!!!!!
Kimuri: Ha! No... not anymore Kenny-boy... She has fallen for the awesome long purple hair and scythe-wielding higher demon... and not a stupid redheaded, reverse-blade using human! HA! HA-HA!
Kenshin: growls some incoherent Japanese curse under his breath
Kimuri: kisses Aud's hand A rose would smell as sweet, or some other thing like that... grins
Aud: blushes
Kenshin: tempted to draw his Sakabatou and turn Kimuri into a reverse blade shish kabob
Kimuri: ready to fight to the death over Aud
Aud: a bit creeped out that the two bishounen were about to be at each other's throats.
Vincent: Great... Two idiots fighting over an even bigger idiot... What a fight this will be...
Razzy: Yeah! Its gonna be great! grabs a tub of popcorn-flavored souls and plops down on a couch that just appeared from who knows where
Vincent: sighs Oh well... it will be amusing while we wait for Seph... goes ands sits on the couch next to Razzy goes to take a handful of the "popcorn"
Razzy: hisses and covers the tub of souls Mine!!!! scootches to the edge of the couch away from Vincent
Vincent: sighs again and takes out a large soda I just wish Seph would hurry up...
Back inside the doughnut shop... We find Seph about ready to whip out a pistol and shoot either himself or the old woman, struggling to decide which one needed to be put out of their misery more...
Old woman: almost past the cash register
Seph: reaches into black trenchy and fiddles around with the pistol taking it out a bit, and then putting it back, taking it out a bit, and then putting it back again
Old woman: keels over
Seph: lets go of the pistol and looks over the counter at the old woman Ma'am...? Umm... Excuse me...? Hello...?! jumps over the counter and pokes at the old woman Hello...? Are you dead...?
Old woman: deflates
Seph: Ewww... pokes again at the sack of deflated skin Hey...! Cool! This is fun...! pokes it a few more times pokes Heh-heh-heh... pokes Heh-heh-heh. looks around Hmmm... picks up the skin and puts it on his head I am Cannibal! Here me roa-
Sano: finally has regained consciousness steps into shop blink blink
Seph: whips the old woman's deflated skin off You didn't see or hear anything, I swear you didn't!
Sano: Uhh... ok... I... didn't...?
Seph: kicks the skin aside Exactly.
Sano: a bit disgusted So Seph... where's the doughnuts... We're all waitin'
Seph: can smell the fresh baked doughnuts in the room only a few feet away C'mon Sano, the goods are right in the room next to us!
Sano: Uhhh... all right...?
So, Seph and Sano go into the room. In it, they were surrounded by innumerable amounts of various kinds of doughnuts. Sano grabbed a handful of a certain type of doughnut and looked around for something to put them in.
Sano: Seph...! Where's the bags and boxes and crap?!
Seph: looks around Hmmm... idea pops into head Wait right here! runs out of room
Sano: Seph! But- oh, never mind... continues piling the doughnuts into his arms
Seph: jumps back into the room with something on his shoulder
Sano: What the heck is that?!
Seph: spreads the thing out across a table
Sano: sees the distinct color and wrinkles of an old lady that had been conveniently shaped into a draw-string bag Seph... that's nasty...
Seph: snaps death glare towards Sano No Sano... It's not nasty... It's... useful...
Sano: shrugs I guess your right.... fills the old woman bag with hundreds of dollars worth of doughnuts We don't have to pay for this crap do we...?
Seph: No Sano, no we don't.
Sano: grins and slings the "granny bag" over his shoulder Groovy does peace sign
Seph: does peace sign back Verizon.
Sano: Yup...
Both step outside to find Kenshin and Kimuri standing in front of each other slapping at each other's hands...
Seph: looks to Razzy Lemme guess... Kenshin found out about Kimuri being Aud's new Bishounen... Right...?
Razzy: nods Mm-hmm. takes a fistful of souls and devours them
Vincent: completely bored, looking still at Kenshin and Kimuri Did you guys remember to say thank you to the poor old lady inside?
Sano: looks at the bag over his shoulder Uhhh...
Seph: puts hand over Sano's mouth Of course we did!
Vincent: not paying much attention at all to them Good...
Razzy: totally sucked into the fight C'mon Kimuri! Don't be a whimp! Hit him back!
Kimuri: She's mine!!!!
Kenshin: slapping vigorously No Kimuri! She's mine!!!
Suddenly, Lizz and Em walk in.
Lizz: Aud... what'd you do now?
Aud: Nothing...!
Em: She's lying Lizz.
Lizz: I know Em... I know.
Em: She should be punished for her lies.
Lizz: Yes... Yes she should. whips out box of J.D. chocolates and hands a handful of gold ones to Em Here Em... Eat up.
EM: tears into chocolate, foaming at the mouth
Lizz: taunts Aud by eating them slowly in front of her Man these things are good... Want some more Em...?
Em: rips the box out of Lizz's hands and opens her mouth wider than Aud and Lizz thought was possible, pouring all the J.D into her mouth
Lizz: tears in eyes What...what are you doing Em...? That's my J.D....!
Em: foaming more at mouth, can smell the Sake on Sano's breath jumps him and steals all 57 of his "secret" flasks
Sano: My Sake! My whiskey! My vodka!
Vincent: That's not vodka... that's moonshine...
Sano: Er, yea... My moonshine!
Em: opens them all and dumps them into her mouth,
Sano: cries and mourns the loss of his alcohol.
Lizz: still crying because she only had one of the J.D.'s Em! Calm down!
Aud: crying because she didn't have any of the J.D.'s
Kenshin & Kimuri: still slapping and fighting
Razzy: turns to Vincent Pathetic humans.
Vincent: I agree...
Seph: grabs the granny bag from Sano and sits next to Vincent and Razzy Doughnuts...?
Vincent: shrugs and pulls a Rum doughnut out of the bag Dude... What the heck is up with that bag...? It's all cold... and wrinkly... and... OH MY GOD YOU MURDERED THE OLD LADY!!!