Some times when me and Sam get into arguments its my fault. I'll get sick of signing and wish he would write. Or when I get mad that he won't come out to his parents. Sometimes its his. Mad that I'm a singer, that we can't share some things the frustration he feels. Sometimes it that he gets mad when I slack off in school saying that I'm wasting my life. I can't make it on talent alone.

Normally we don't fight much, so it was a big surprise for me when he got mad at me for wanting to join the GSA. Both of us are out to the school as well as my mom. I didn't even ask him to join me. Well I might have hinted that it would have been nice, but I didn't ask.

Sam flipped out. He started to sign, the realized that he didn't have the words to say what he wanted to. His hands were held out in front of his chest, open, the fingers lightly spread and curled. His face looked shocked, he'd never had something he couldn't sign. Never had something his language couldn't supply him.

"What?" I asked my hands signing it gently, my entire frame questioning. My face looked worried, I'd never seen Sam so helpless.

"If I go to a G-S-A then they'll know" Sam looked so sad that I for a second I forgot all my anger at him and had an overwhelming urge to hug him.

"Know your Gay" He said, not able to look me in the eye.

"AND YOU'RE NOT!" I yelled, Sam cringed as I realized that for the first time I had yelled at him, Yelling not signing. It scared me, made me feel foolish. Of course in our school every hearing kid got impatient and said something without signing it. But I'd been so good at it. Never knowing how they could forget. I laughed at them, but now I knew, sign would always be a second language never the one I thought with, always a new thing to my mind and when I would be the most needing to communicate with Sam I might not be able too.

"What?" Sam asked looking pathetic, my hands were held up by my face, the palms open, pointing at him. "What?" He asked more worried, wanting to know, to gain entry to the things that I was obviously learning.

"You aren't gay?" I asked, letting my mind leave the revelations to later. "Is that what you mean?"

"I am!" Sam said quickly "I just don't want my parents to know!"

"Why not?"

"Because they hate gays!" Sam snapped his hand movements quick "I thought I told you that!"

"But you'd be out! No more hiding or worrying!"

"I'd be out yes! Kicked out!"

"You could live with me and my mom!" My mother opened up our small house to my friends who needed it when I was in the seventh grade, when my best friend at the time was being teased ruthlessly by her step brother and needed a place to stay while negotiations at home took place. The tradition had continued when we moved.

"You're mom doesn't know sign!"

"I don't see why it matters if I join."

"Because if they know you're gay then they'll hate you and tell me not to ever hang out with you!"

"So you're ashamed of me!"

"Never!"

"You seem like you are!"

Sam looked like I had slapped him. "Alec, I couldn't ever be ashamed of you" He said his hands soft Gently he touched my chin "And I'm not ashamed of us." He kissed me lightly "I just don't want my parents to know. Maybe I can tell them later, when I'm not so dependant on them." I know what he means. His parents pay for translators, they pay for a lot of things, and he loves them.

"Sam" I whisper then blush "Sorry" I sign. It strikes me again that we have this block in front of us. "S-A-M" I start "I don't" I realized I don't have the words, in sign or speaking. This is too big to convey in a language. I pull him to me in a tight hug kissing below his ear whispering against his skin "I love you" My lips brushing against his skin.

Our relationship isn't perfect. We get into fights. We argue. I don't know what silence sounds like. His family will never approve of what we are. But I will say that we do love each other. And that's worth more then any fight can cost.

Authors notes: Aww! So cuute!