Chapter 6: The Window to the Soul
(It's strange to be an outsider in your own body. I look out the windows that are called my eyes and see the sunrise over the hell that is Simulacrum. We are about a mile away and I can STILL see that damn city, it's that big! When Granny told me about it, I thought to myself "Ah, it ain't going to be so bad." But now… I shudder when I see the empty and cold stone buildings, it feels as if they are tugging at my soul. Roka wants to stop before we get to Simulacrum, he says he wants to take a bath. And here I was thinking that HE was the anxious one. Well, color me surprised, so I guess even Roka has his scruples about dirtiness!)
Roka watched as the reflection of the sunrise turned the water red and then a slight gold color. He smiled, he had always like watching the sunrise when his wife was still alive. His smile twitched into a snarl, every time he thought about Mila he was hit by a wave of emotions and had to compose himself promptly. It would not serve him well to lose to himself AND his disgusting son!
He killed her, the little bastard! His stupidity shamed her and she killed herself after giving birth to Shane. Yes, she slit her wrist one day and…
(Foolish man, why are you deluding yourself this way. YOU killed her with your own hands and you are blaming GALLOWS for a crime he did not commit! You are the bad guy here, not your son!)
Roka flinched at the voice in his head and snarled a little, he wasn't supposed to be hearing voices!
Rsalis! Shouldn't you be with your "vessel" right now? I am not your little puppet, Gallows is, so leave me be and mind your own damn business!
(Roka, you are the most idiotic man I have ever met, and that is saying a lot! You are currently possessing my vessel, and if I so desired, I could kill him and trap your soul in his body for eternity!)
Roka shuddered at the concept of being trapped in Gallows' body, but nonetheless, he was curious as to why Rsalis HADN'T killed Gallows in order to stop him.
Why don't you kill Gallows and myself then? I mean, you are quite capable of it.
To this inane question, Rsalis chuckled mirthfully and Roka felt a stab of pain at the base of his skull.
(Don't tempt fate my friend. The only reason I let you two live is because Gallows has someone he needs to protect. I think that deep down you understand his need to protect the ones that he loves.)
Roka sighed a little and submerged his head in the warm water, causing Gallows to see the world through watery vision. After about half a minute, Roka's head broke the surface and he rubbed his face thoroughly.
Why did I kill her? I don't remember that part anymore..
(Because you felt that she was suffering after she gave birth to Shane. It wasn't that you were evil, it was just that you could not stand to see the woman that you loved suffer…. You turned evil when you sold your soul…)
Roka shook his head violently and stood up, ignoring the cool breeze that tickled his expose body. He closed his eyes and banged his head with his fist, surprising both himself and Gallows.
(Hey now, that's cold! Put me back in the water, I hate being cold and wet, it makes my..)
(Gallows, I don't want to hear it. Roka is kind of losing his mind right now, it probably would be a good idea to calm him down don't you think?)
Gallows nodded his head in agreement and fought the urge to force Roka back down into the water.
(What can I do to help?)
(Talk to him. That's all I can say on the matter.)
(But he hates me, I can't just walk up and talk to him! I'm having a hard enough time keeping MY sanity, and now you want me to help keep Roka's?!)
(Gallows, stop underestimating yourself! You are a lot smarter than people give you credit for. I will put Roka to sleep, invade his dreams and talk to him there!)
(Y'know, it sucks being a stranger in my own body…)
(It'll all be over soon… One way or another.)
Gallows shivered and felt a wave of sleepiness tug at his mind.
I killed her… no… GALLOWS killed her.. he….
Roka felt his legs turn rubbery and he sank back into the pool of water, his eyes rolling back into his head and then closing.
All his fault…
Roka opened his eyes and looked around at the surreal dreamscape with confusion and a little bit of fear. A fine fog floated eerily above the reddened ground and dead leaves scuttled over his bare feet. He knelt down and picked up some dirt, noting the moist and sticky consistency of it. With a worried frown, he let the dirt fall from his shaky hand and watched with grim amazement as it turned to blood.
(Everything I touch…) Roka stood up, shaking his head a little as he did so.
" Hello?" said Roka, looking around for a sign of life. In response to his question, a mournful wind howled, pushing the fog aside to reveal a grave. Roka gasped and walked slowly to the grave sight and rubbed the dirt off of the cold stone slab. A hot tear rolled down his face as he read the inscription.
"Here lies Mila Carradine, loving wife and mother. May Rsalis' gentle hand lead you safely home."
He touched the grave with a sigh and longed for his wife with a passion that he had long since forgot.
"I miss her too." Said a soft voice behind him, he stood up and whirled around, facing a mirror version of himself. Gallows smiled a little and walked up to Roka without a hint of animosity. Roka glared at him and then turned his back on his son. Gallows ignored the rude gesture and walked up beside him, looking down at his mother's grave.
" What are you doing here, you incompetent fool? " snarled Roka, trying his best to hide the sadness that darted around in his eyes. Gallows laughed a little and scratched the back of his head.
"Well, I was hoping that I would hear mother's voice today. I guess that she's confused about having TWO incompetent Gallows' running around. Why don't you change into who you really are, that way she can see your face and not my ugly one?"
Roka snickered at his son's comment and rubbed the dirt off of his hands.
"I don't remember how I look. Do you honestly think that I like looking like you? Ha! You are too funny! You are so hideous and stupid, I am surprised that Halle did not kill you out of general principal!"
laughed Roka, turning his head toward Gallows and giving him a cruel smile, his golden eyes flickering with amusement. Gallows smiled a meaningful but slightly sarcastic smile back at the golden eyed demon.
"Yeah, I bet you were a knock out, huh?" inquired Gallows, still smiling a meaningful smile.
" I have no desire to discuss such issues with you, you incompetent dog.." replied Roka, looking away from Gallows with disdain. Gallows sat down in front of his mother's grace and closed his eyes, his lips moving in a silent prayer. Roka looked at his son with a mixture of pity and loathing.
Is he mocking me? Why is he here anyway? To spite me? To remind me of why I loathe him so much?
"What are you doing? Praying for intelligence? If so, don't expect to get a response, the Guardian Lords don't care much for losers."
Gallows said nothing but opened his eyes and looked at Roka angrily, causing Roka to flinch a little.
I have never seen that look in his eyes before. He almost seems EVIL! Maybe I did a better job than I thought… Maybe I have corrupted his soul beyond repair!
(Maybe, but is that what you really want?)
But of course! He RUINED my life with his existence, he…
"Do you know how hard it was to lie to my brother?" whispered Gallows, his caustic voice breaking Roka's thoughts and causing him to look at his son with surprise.
"What?" rasped Roka, tugging at his hair with annoyance. Gallows closed his eyes and took a step closer.
"I had to lie to my little brother about you…. And…" he opened his eyes and clenched his fist, his blue eyes glowing with silent fury. "What you did to mother."
"…. How did you..? " stuttered Roka, completely knocked off guard by Gallows' harsh words.
"I saw you that night. I watched as you shoved a pillow over her face and slit her wrist to make it look like suicide. You thought that you had it all planned out, you had even wrote a suicide note mimicking her handwriting. But, there was one detail you forgot… and that was me." Said Gallows, his eyes narrowing into glowing slits. Roka snarled and grabbed Gallows by the hair, Gallows laughed and kicked him in the stomach. Winded, Roka fell backwards and doubled over in pain. Gallows walked over to him and looked down at his panting form. Roka looked up at Gallows, his eyes full of anger and pain.
"Why.. why did you not stop me?" panted Roka, slowly straightening up, his eyes still on his son. Gallows snorted and took a couple of steps back, allowing his "old man" some breathing room.
"How the hell was I supposed to stop you? You were bigger than me at the time if I recall correctly.."
"You KNEW and you just let it slide?! Some son YOU are, you could have screamed for help or tried to fight me off.. But you just stood there and watched me off….." Roka sprang at Gallows with a snarl, Gallows sidestepped his lunged and brought his elbow down on his father's back as hard as he could. Roka's face slammed into the ground and the coppery taste of blood filled his mouth quickly.
"I was not the coward. You were the one that acted out of fear and self pity! Stop blaming me for your shortcomings and act like a damn MAN for once in your life!" spat Gallows, looking at Roka heatedly. Roka lifted his head and spat out a burst of blood and a couple of his teeth.
"I… She was suffering… I…" started Roka, pushing himself to his hands and knees slowly. Gallows grabbed him by his arm and pulled him quickly to his feet. Roka nearly fell again and Gallows steadied him. Roka looked up at his son with confusion and then spitefully pulled away, spitting in Gallows' face as he did so. Gallows laughed and wiped the spit off of his face, and looked at Roka with a mixture of amusement and loathing. Roka straightened his back and glared at Gallows balefully.
"You understand nothing, you fool! She was suffering everyday, she was….."
"Aware that you were cheating on her…" finished Gallows angrily, clenching his fist and glaring at Roka. Roka gasped at Gallows' statement and quickly rose to his feet, shaking with fury and fear. Gallows watched with amusement as his father tried to piece together his stuttered defense.
" I..I NEVER cheated on Mila…She… she meant EVERYTHING to me!"
Gallows closed his eyes tightly, trying his best to push away the rage that he felt.
" Oh really? Then why did Mila find you in bed with Laraina's mother?" asked Gallows quietly, his smooth voice dripping with over two decades of venom. Roka was at a lost for words, he was beaten and he was aware of that . Roka looked at Gallows with an emotionless face and empty eyes, his hand reaching for the dagger that was strapped to his belt. Gallows noticed his movement and grabbed the dagger on HIS belt.
"You really don't want to do that…" snickered Gallows, holding the ceremonial dagger in front of him in a ready stance. Roka mirrored his son's stance and smiled at Gallows caustically.
"You won't win…You.."
"BOSS, SOMEONE IS COMING!" thundered a voice from the sky. Roka smiled as their surroundings slowly faded away. Gallows sheathed his dagger and cursed inwardly, he had been so CLOSE!
(Damn Rlaza! I had completely forgot about him!… Rsalis, I'm sorry that I screwed this one up..)
(You did not screw anything up. I, myself, did not take Rlaza's presence into account. It is I who should be apologizing, not you.)
Hm. You and Rsalis are SO amusing! Really, the little graveyard scene was SUPERB! I really liked that dark and brooding touch!
(Shit…. The wind bag is back…) Gallows comment was answered with an enraged roar.
Shut up, Gallows. You are the cause of all of my problems! You… you and your idiocy KILLED MY WIFE! She's DEAD, she won't be coming back…..
(Amazing, he doesn't even remember what he and I spoke of..) thought Gallows to Rsalis, using the wavelength that was just below Roka's waking perception.
(His mind AND soul are gone now. It is too late for him… and possibly for you…)
Gallows sighed, closed his eyes, and rubbed his temples with exasperation.
(If you must kill me to end his tyranny, so be it. I just want to keep Virginia safe.)
(… Your dedication to Virginia is touching, that is why I am so hesitant to make a rash and final decision. I have an idea, it is a long shot, but it just might work…)
(I'm all about long shots! What's the plan?)
(After I tell you this, I want you to enter Virginia's dreams and tell her how you feel and what needs to be done on her behalf.)
Gallows nodded and listened intently to what Rsalis had to say.